Episode 165. Let's Get a Divorce
Olivia slept soundly without dreaming. When she woke up, it was pitch black.
As her eyes adjusted to the darkness, Olivia slowly rose to her feet. Getting up was extremely slow due to the overwhelming pain.
Olivia lit a lamp to brighten the room, then walked toward the bookshelves that densely filled the wall. Everything on the shelves was related to Olivia: her diaries, textbooks, awards, essay collections, and so on.
The bookshelf was in this spot even when her grandmother was alive, and it was filled with her things.
Olivia took out a book she could grab.
It was a diary. She flipped through it casually and read the page that came up.
[...Today was so hard at school. Nicholas keeps making things up and tormenting me.]
She could feel the girl's anger in the tightly pressed handwriting.
[Commoner girl, commoner girl! Guys like Nicholas seem to think my name is Commoner Girl. I was so angry that I asked him if he happened to know the meaning of the word 'Republic'.]
As Olivia turned a few more pages like that, the emotions contained in the writing changed.
[I feel so good! The grades came out today, and I got first place! Nicholas, who used to look down on me and ignore me like that, couldn't say a word. Mr. Neil quietly called me over and gave me a pen set as a gift. He told me that I can become a great adult and that I should continue to study just like this!]
Olivia slowly rolled the name she hadn't seen in a long time around in her mouth, then took out a stack of diaries and sat on the sofa.
As she turned the pages one by one, before she knew it, her time had flowed back to that period.
Each and every one of those pages was young Olivia's time.
Young Olivia lived fiercely. She never lived a wasted life, not even for a single moment.
Olivia turned another page, holding back the tears that threatened to well up.
However, there was a short piece of writing there that was not hers. Olivia tilted her head closer to the diary.
Olivia held her breath when she saw the elegant handwriting with slightly curved ends.
[My dear granddaughter, Olivia. I wanted to give you only the best, and I came here thinking this was the best I could offer... but sometimes I wonder if this choice was right.]
Olivia's eyes turned red at the words carefully written by the wrinkled old woman.
[It's really hard, isn't it?]
Olivia covered her mouth. She felt like she was going to die, drowning in the pouring tears.
[I am always sorry. But I believe that you will become a person who stands firm. I believe that you will become someone who has won the freedom to shape your life as you please. And I am always praying that you become such a person.]
“Ah, Grandma...”
Olivia eventually buried her face in her diary.
[I love you. From the beginning to the end of the universe. And... I am always, endlessly sorry.]
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry...”
I loved you too.
Then...
Olivia absolutely could not stay like this, so she stood up. Then, hastily dressed, she went outside.
“Your Highness?!”
As she left the room and walked down the hallway, Mrs. Betty came rushing out from somewhere. However, Olivia opened the front door and went outside even faster. She was that fast, even though she was in a state where she could barely walk.
Her grandmother is also buried in the place where the remains of her parents and grandfather, brought from Herod, are interred.
'I have to meet them.'
When she stepped into the desolate garden with that single-minded determination, a person was standing under the faint moonlight. Olivia stopped in her tracks and gazed at him.
Brilliant blonde hair like the moon illuminating the pitch-black night, eyes like pretty jewels that are too dim to see, a person she misses even while looking at them.
But holding the stake named love...
My Cruel Salvation, Noah.
"I believe you will become someone who has won freedom."
Tears dropped with a thud, making a path.
"Olivia."
He paused for a moment, then rushed over. And before she could do anything, he embraced her.
The bodies pressed against each other were firm and hot, and the hand embracing her back felt like a powerful barrier incomparable to anything in the world.
Was that why I loved him?
Tears kept flowing down. Tears seeped through the gaps in her teeth.
"Noah."
"Yes."
“I guess I...”
How irresponsible to desire such solid protection like a barrier so desperately.
However,
I am always praying that you become that kind of person.
I don't think it can be the peace you wished for.
She keenly felt his body stiffen against hers. Before she could hear his flustered voice, Olivia whispered.
“Let’s... get a divorce.”
It was a path he had run on out of fear.
Noah could not possibly stay seated because he was afraid of Olivia, who had been pushing him away. After waking up, she had changed into a completely different person.
She didn't even try to face him, nor did she smile.
"I love you."
The moment she whispered love felt like a fantasy.
So late at night, he fled the mansion like a madman and ran blindly along a long road. And at the end of that road, he experienced the world collapsing once again.
“Let’s... get a divorce.”
Ansen Wilhelm's curse-like words came to mind.
In the end, it seems she has no intention of forgiving him.
Olivia pushed his frozen heart away. Pushed back by a sliver of strength, Noah stared blankly at Olivia.
Even though she had lost weight and looked haggard, she was beautiful.
Dark eyes filled with intelligence, large, round eyes that curve downward when smiling, a moderately prominent nose, and red, plump lips.
...But that is not all.
"Because you are you, ever since that autumn night, I... you..."
“I made a promise to His Majesty. If he helps me regain my lost rights, I will take responsibility for constructing Herod’s independent Magic Dome.”
"Olivia."
“The Magic Dome in the name of the Duke of Rosemond..."
"Look at me."
Olivia, who had been speaking while staring blankly at the darkness, slowly turned her head.
His eyes, like a wisp of deep autumn, were clouded in disarray. Yet, even as she looked at him like that, Olivia hurled cruel words at him.
“Once all of that is over...”
"No."
"Let's get a divorce."
"No."
Something lukewarm ran down his cheek, but Noah did not notice. The blowing wind whipped sharply at his hair, but he could feel nothing.
“No, Liv.”
He was afraid that there would no longer be love in the eyes of the woman who had become his world before he knew it.
Her hair was the sky and earth that cast his world, her laughter was the water that kept him alive, and the love she whispered was the air that filled his world.
His cruel salvation finally withdrew its gaze from him and moved toward the darkness.
Noah followed her, holding his breath in a hurry.
“Where are you going?”
“...”
Noah could no longer bear it and hugged Olivia from behind as she walked toward the cold darkness.
“Liv, please...”
“Let me go. I... I’m going to see Grandma.”
“Let’s go together. Wherever you go, whatever you do, I won’t tell you not to do it. In return, I’ll go with you. No, let me go with you.”
Noah released his arm and clutched Olivia's cold hand.
Olivia stared down at his large hand.
His hand, which had felt stronger than anything in the world, was trembling very slightly.
The place where her grandmother was buried was a cemetery owned by a small church on the outskirts of Pulder. The remains of her parents and grandfather, brought from Herod, were also buried there.
The priest on duty at the cathedral greeted the late-night visitors with a calm demeanor. He did not recognize Olivia and Noah, appearing as if he had completely severed ties with the secular world. After all, who would have expected Herod's Prince and Princess to arrive at such an hour?
The cemetery was located on a low hill behind the cathedral.
Lanterns were hanging here and there, but they were worse than having no lights at all. Fortunately, it was a bright moonlit night, so the graveyard was clearly visible.
Noah was restless, worried that Olivia might collapse.
However, Olivia, who had not fully recovered, was exerting an unusual amount of strength. Slowly, but without ever resting.
For some reason, that sight was heartbreaking.
"Could we stop by Roswell?"
"With what were you making such a suggestion to me?"
"Do you really have to stop by there? There isn't much to see."
He wondered how she felt when he heard his answer.
Eventually, she stopped in front of a flat tombstone. Noah's gaze turned downward.
The names of four people were engraved vertically on a tombstone lying flat on the ground.
Hamill Marx. James Marx. Sylvia Marx. Susanna Liberty.
As if carved last, only Susanna's name had a different indentation.
Noah's gaze slid down to the name. Below the name, the following words were engraved.
[I love you, Olivia.]
It must have been the grandmother's consideration, worried that her young granddaughter would be upset.
Olivia stared blankly at the tombstone for a moment, then slowly sank. She knelt on the cold ground and leaned her upper body over the tombstone. Then, lying face down, she quietly embraced the tombstone.
It seems that her parents passed away around this time as well.
Somewhere on the boundary between winter and spring.
Olivia pressed her cheek against the tombstone and whispered.
“Mom, Dad, Grandpa, Grandma. I’m here.”
You probably aren't here anymore, but still... I'm here.
Noah was not the Noah Margot knew.
His attitude and behavior were no different. The etiquette, ingrained in him as naturally as breathing, made it appear that way.
Nevertheless, he seemed as if he were standing on the edge of a cliff. Or like a faded, fallen leaf barely clinging to the tip of a dry branch.
He declined dinner and holed up in his room. Then, late at night past midnight, he suddenly stormed out of the mansion.
Startled, Margot ran out, but Noah had already vanished, and not even his shadow was visible.
Where could he have gone?
After Noah disappeared, Margot could not fall asleep at all.
After pacing the room for a long time, listening to the sounds of the silent darkness, a faint light came in without a sound.
In the unusually pale dawn, just as Margot stopped her weary steps and gasped for a long breath.
The sound of the mansion's heavy door opening was heard.
Margot ran to the window in one swift motion. And when she looked out, she let out a sigh without realizing it.
"Ah..."
Margot's eyes flickered. Even from a distance, she could feel that Noah Astrid was nothing but a shell.
Margot ran down the hallway without even thinking to button her gown. When she passed the grand landing and reached the entrance, Noah was standing there motionless.
"Noah."
“...”
“Noah...”
“...”
His eyes, once firm with pride despite their weariness, had lost their light, and his broad shoulders, which had always appeared strong, looked merely empty like the massive tombs of Eastern Kings.
Olivia slept soundly without dreaming. When she woke up, it was pitch black.
As her eyes adjusted to the darkness, Olivia slowly rose to her feet. Getting up was extremely slow due to the overwhelming pain.
Olivia lit a lamp to brighten the room, then walked toward the bookshelves that densely filled the wall. Everything on the shelves was related to Olivia: her diaries, textbooks, awards, essay collections, and so on.
The bookshelf was in this spot even when her grandmother was alive, and it was filled with her things.
Olivia took out a book she could grab.
It was a diary. She flipped through it casually and read the page that came up.
[...Today was so hard at school. Nicholas keeps making things up and tormenting me.]
She could feel the girl's anger in the tightly pressed handwriting.
[Commoner girl, commoner girl! Guys like Nicholas seem to think my name is Commoner Girl. I was so angry that I asked him if he happened to know the meaning of the word 'Republic'.]
As Olivia turned a few more pages like that, the emotions contained in the writing changed.
[I feel so good! The grades came out today, and I got first place! Nicholas, who used to look down on me and ignore me like that, couldn't say a word. Mr. Neil quietly called me over and gave me a pen set as a gift. He told me that I can become a great adult and that I should continue to study just like this!]
Olivia slowly rolled the name she hadn't seen in a long time around in her mouth, then took out a stack of diaries and sat on the sofa.
As she turned the pages one by one, before she knew it, her time had flowed back to that period.
Each and every one of those pages was young Olivia's time.
Young Olivia lived fiercely. She never lived a wasted life, not even for a single moment.
Olivia turned another page, holding back the tears that threatened to well up.
However, there was a short piece of writing there that was not hers. Olivia tilted her head closer to the diary.
Olivia held her breath when she saw the elegant handwriting with slightly curved ends.
[My dear granddaughter, Olivia. I wanted to give you only the best, and I came here thinking this was the best I could offer... but sometimes I wonder if this choice was right.]
Olivia's eyes turned red at the words carefully written by the wrinkled old woman.
[It's really hard, isn't it?]
Olivia covered her mouth. She felt like she was going to die, drowning in the pouring tears.
[I am always sorry. But I believe that you will become a person who stands firm. I believe that you will become someone who has won the freedom to shape your life as you please. And I am always praying that you become such a person.]
“Ah, Grandma...”
Olivia eventually buried her face in her diary.
[I love you. From the beginning to the end of the universe. And... I am always, endlessly sorry.]
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry...”
I loved you too.
Then...
Olivia absolutely could not stay like this, so she stood up. Then, hastily dressed, she went outside.
“Your Highness?!”
As she left the room and walked down the hallway, Mrs. Betty came rushing out from somewhere. However, Olivia opened the front door and went outside even faster. She was that fast, even though she was in a state where she could barely walk.
Her grandmother is also buried in the place where the remains of her parents and grandfather, brought from Herod, are interred.
'I have to meet them.'
When she stepped into the desolate garden with that single-minded determination, a person was standing under the faint moonlight. Olivia stopped in her tracks and gazed at him.
Brilliant blonde hair like the moon illuminating the pitch-black night, eyes like pretty jewels that are too dim to see, a person she misses even while looking at them.
But holding the stake named love...
My Cruel Salvation, Noah.
"I believe you will become someone who has won freedom."
Tears dropped with a thud, making a path.
"Olivia."
He paused for a moment, then rushed over. And before she could do anything, he embraced her.
The bodies pressed against each other were firm and hot, and the hand embracing her back felt like a powerful barrier incomparable to anything in the world.
Was that why I loved him?
Tears kept flowing down. Tears seeped through the gaps in her teeth.
"Noah."
"Yes."
“I guess I...”
How irresponsible to desire such solid protection like a barrier so desperately.
However,
I am always praying that you become that kind of person.
I don't think it can be the peace you wished for.
She keenly felt his body stiffen against hers. Before she could hear his flustered voice, Olivia whispered.
“Let’s... get a divorce.”
***
It was a path he had run on out of fear.
Noah could not possibly stay seated because he was afraid of Olivia, who had been pushing him away. After waking up, she had changed into a completely different person.
She didn't even try to face him, nor did she smile.
"I love you."
The moment she whispered love felt like a fantasy.
So late at night, he fled the mansion like a madman and ran blindly along a long road. And at the end of that road, he experienced the world collapsing once again.
“Let’s... get a divorce.”
Ansen Wilhelm's curse-like words came to mind.
In the end, it seems she has no intention of forgiving him.
Olivia pushed his frozen heart away. Pushed back by a sliver of strength, Noah stared blankly at Olivia.
Even though she had lost weight and looked haggard, she was beautiful.
Dark eyes filled with intelligence, large, round eyes that curve downward when smiling, a moderately prominent nose, and red, plump lips.
...But that is not all.
"Because you are you, ever since that autumn night, I... you..."
“I made a promise to His Majesty. If he helps me regain my lost rights, I will take responsibility for constructing Herod’s independent Magic Dome.”
"Olivia."
“The Magic Dome in the name of the Duke of Rosemond..."
"Look at me."
Olivia, who had been speaking while staring blankly at the darkness, slowly turned her head.
His eyes, like a wisp of deep autumn, were clouded in disarray. Yet, even as she looked at him like that, Olivia hurled cruel words at him.
“Once all of that is over...”
"No."
"Let's get a divorce."
"No."
Something lukewarm ran down his cheek, but Noah did not notice. The blowing wind whipped sharply at his hair, but he could feel nothing.
“No, Liv.”
He was afraid that there would no longer be love in the eyes of the woman who had become his world before he knew it.
Her hair was the sky and earth that cast his world, her laughter was the water that kept him alive, and the love she whispered was the air that filled his world.
His cruel salvation finally withdrew its gaze from him and moved toward the darkness.
Noah followed her, holding his breath in a hurry.
“Where are you going?”
“...”
Noah could no longer bear it and hugged Olivia from behind as she walked toward the cold darkness.
“Liv, please...”
“Let me go. I... I’m going to see Grandma.”
“Let’s go together. Wherever you go, whatever you do, I won’t tell you not to do it. In return, I’ll go with you. No, let me go with you.”
Noah released his arm and clutched Olivia's cold hand.
Olivia stared down at his large hand.
His hand, which had felt stronger than anything in the world, was trembling very slightly.
The place where her grandmother was buried was a cemetery owned by a small church on the outskirts of Pulder. The remains of her parents and grandfather, brought from Herod, were also buried there.
The priest on duty at the cathedral greeted the late-night visitors with a calm demeanor. He did not recognize Olivia and Noah, appearing as if he had completely severed ties with the secular world. After all, who would have expected Herod's Prince and Princess to arrive at such an hour?
The cemetery was located on a low hill behind the cathedral.
Lanterns were hanging here and there, but they were worse than having no lights at all. Fortunately, it was a bright moonlit night, so the graveyard was clearly visible.
Noah was restless, worried that Olivia might collapse.
However, Olivia, who had not fully recovered, was exerting an unusual amount of strength. Slowly, but without ever resting.
For some reason, that sight was heartbreaking.
"Could we stop by Roswell?"
"With what were you making such a suggestion to me?"
"Do you really have to stop by there? There isn't much to see."
He wondered how she felt when he heard his answer.
Eventually, she stopped in front of a flat tombstone. Noah's gaze turned downward.
The names of four people were engraved vertically on a tombstone lying flat on the ground.
Hamill Marx. James Marx. Sylvia Marx. Susanna Liberty.
As if carved last, only Susanna's name had a different indentation.
Noah's gaze slid down to the name. Below the name, the following words were engraved.
[I love you, Olivia.]
It must have been the grandmother's consideration, worried that her young granddaughter would be upset.
Olivia stared blankly at the tombstone for a moment, then slowly sank. She knelt on the cold ground and leaned her upper body over the tombstone. Then, lying face down, she quietly embraced the tombstone.
It seems that her parents passed away around this time as well.
Somewhere on the boundary between winter and spring.
Olivia pressed her cheek against the tombstone and whispered.
“Mom, Dad, Grandpa, Grandma. I’m here.”
You probably aren't here anymore, but still... I'm here.
***
Noah was not the Noah Margot knew.
His attitude and behavior were no different. The etiquette, ingrained in him as naturally as breathing, made it appear that way.
Nevertheless, he seemed as if he were standing on the edge of a cliff. Or like a faded, fallen leaf barely clinging to the tip of a dry branch.
He declined dinner and holed up in his room. Then, late at night past midnight, he suddenly stormed out of the mansion.
Startled, Margot ran out, but Noah had already vanished, and not even his shadow was visible.
Where could he have gone?
After Noah disappeared, Margot could not fall asleep at all.
After pacing the room for a long time, listening to the sounds of the silent darkness, a faint light came in without a sound.
In the unusually pale dawn, just as Margot stopped her weary steps and gasped for a long breath.
The sound of the mansion's heavy door opening was heard.
Margot ran to the window in one swift motion. And when she looked out, she let out a sigh without realizing it.
"Ah..."
Margot's eyes flickered. Even from a distance, she could feel that Noah Astrid was nothing but a shell.
Margot ran down the hallway without even thinking to button her gown. When she passed the grand landing and reached the entrance, Noah was standing there motionless.
"Noah."
“...”
“Noah...”
“...”
His eyes, once firm with pride despite their weariness, had lost their light, and his broad shoulders, which had always appeared strong, looked merely empty like the massive tombs of Eastern Kings.
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