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Heiner's jaw tightened. He put down the ledger and pulled out a jewelry box. He had seen this box several times during their relationship. Heiner slowly opened it.
Contrary to expectations that it would contain the numerous jewels she owned, it was empty. Only a single diamond ring lay there.
It was their wedding ring.
Heiner stared blankly at it. A large diamond glittered in the darkness.
No other jewels were found in the room. This was the only one Annette currently possessed.
'On the day of the shooting, Annette said she disposed of some jewelry.'
But from what he heard, it wasn't much. So, that was all Annette had.
The amount of money she had disposed of wasn't that large, and since it was her maidenly hobby to change her jewelry, he didn't pay much attention to it.
But now that he thinks about it, it was just her organizing her belongings.
Heiner picked up the diamond ring with trembling hands.
“Where did the ring go?”
“I just took it off.”
"Just?"
“It’s meaningless now.”
Heiner looked down at his hand. Their wedding ring was still on his ring finger. He had never taken it off.
Even when he hated her deeply in his heart.
Even at times when he just wanted to kill her and feel at ease.
Even when he was making useless excuses to go to her room just to see her face.
Even when he spent countless nights loitering in the garden overlooking her room.
Heiner never took off this ring.
The woman lying on the bed, as if dead, was pale, but still beautiful.
With the constant care of her caregivers, Annette seemed no different than usual. She seemed ready to open her eyes at any moment if he called her, "Annette."
Heiner stared blankly at the bandage wrapped around her wrist. It seemed unusually thick on her small, thin arm.
He fiddled with the ring in his hand. He tried to put it back on, but it happened to be her left hand that was bandaged. She was also clenching her fist weakly.
It looked so precarious that he was afraid to touch it. Even if it meant simply putting a ring on it, he couldn't bring himself to touch it.
After much thought, Heiner finally put the ring back in his pocket.
The metal chair creaked. He leaned his elbows on his knees and stared intently at her face. The one he had been peeking at and yearning for for so long...
Old memories surged up like a fountain.
A little girl is sitting in the corner of a flower bed, sobbing sadly. She had a fine dress, long, neatly braided blonde hair, and glassy eyes.
“Annette.”
An opponent so dazzling and noble that just looking at him felt like a sin.
“I still... don’t know what to do.”
You're still not innocent. Even if you choose death, it doesn't replace your innocence.
So nothing is resolved between us.
If you wake up like this again, what on earth should I do?
Heiner clasped his hands together and rested his chin on them. His heart was so distraught that he could barely sit upright.
“When you wake up...”
His throat felt a little choked up. He took a shaky breath and struggled to continue speaking.
“Let’s go to Glenford.”
He couldn't say, "Let's go back to the happy times." He couldn't be sure everything would be better. He come too far for that.
“If you want to see the sea, I will let you see it.”
Nevertheless, Heiner said so.
“I’ll let you go where you want to go.”
If you want to ride a train, ride together. If you want to walk on the beach, walk together. If you want to see a painter's painting, see it together. If you want to pick up seashells on the beach, pick them up together.
“So come with me...”
Heiner reached out as if to touch her cheek. But his hand lingered in the air, unable to reach her, and he quickly withdrew.
He still hated her. He still couldn't forgive her. He still wanted revenge, and he still wanted to keep her by his side, miserable.
“So come with me.”
Nevertheless, Heiner said so.
It was the evening of the fourth day that Annette woke up.
Heiner, who was sitting by the bedside, flipping through the documents, keenly caught her slight movements. Her eyelashes and fingertips were fluttering delicately.
Heiner jumped up and said her name in a trembling voice.
“Annette?”
Her eyelids fluttered in response. Heiner immediately called the doctor.
“Annette, are you awake?”
Annette's eyes slowly opened. Her pupils were cloudy and unfocused. Heiner continued to speak, fearing that her eyes would close again.
“Can you hear me? Can you see me?”
Light slowly returned to her blue eyes. She blinked a couple more times. Heiner called her name again, his voice a mixture of relief and anxiety, desperate.
“Annette...!”
Annette's gaze, groping somewhere in the air, landed on him. For a moment, all her movements stopped. Her rough lips opened and closed again.
The next moment, Annette's eyes were filled with despair and discouragement.
The hands and shoulders that had been stretched out on the bed began to tremble slightly. Even the once calm breathing gradually quickened. Her eyes, moist with sadness like a young animal's, seemed to ask, "Why?"
Heiner was watching this series of changes without really noticing them.
The door burst open. Several nurses and a doctor rushed into the room. The doctor asked Heiner, who was standing at the bedside, for his understanding.
“I’ll check the patient’s condition.”
Heiner stood back, dumbfounded. He couldn't take his eyes off Annette's face as the doctor examined her.
Tears streamed down Annette's face. She shook her shoulders and sobbed in a hushed voice.
“Madam, would you please nod your head?... Madam, can you hear me? Could you please nod your head just once?”
The doctor's calm voice echoed in his head. Heiner clenched his fists, then relaxed them.
A blood-soaked bed. A body lying like a wax doll. Arms drooping. Hands rushing to administer first aid... It felt like that day was being replayed.
After performing some checks, the doctor approached Heiner.
"Well, she appears to be conscious, but her mind is quite unstable. I think we should let her rest for a while."
“...”
“...I... Commander. I think your wife needs some rest.”
Only then did Heiner turn his head creakingly toward the doctor. A belated reply flowed out.
“Oh, yes.”
“I think it would be better to leave the room empty and leave only one caregiver.”
"... Yes."
Heiner nodded, his face still stunned, even to himself. It took a few seconds for the doctor's words to sink in.
Annette was trembling, her eyes tightly shut. Tears streamed down her temples. She slowly turned around.
Even as the doctor left the room, Heiner continued to stare at her. Scenes of Annette's eyelids opening, her exposed pupils darkening, and tears welling up in her eyes played out over and over again.
A pale face gleamed through the narrowing gap in the doorway. Finally, the door closed completely. He leaned against the wall next to the door, his head slightly raised, his eyes closed. He was tired.
'I need to... talk to her.'
Even amidst the confusion, Heiner thought that. He didn't know where to start or how to proceed. He just had to do it.
He felt like he had a lot to say. He had a lot to ask and a lot to answer. She was mentally unstable... Yeah, it made sense, since she'd only just woken up.
Heiner was determined to talk to her, something he had been avoiding for a very long time.
Perhaps Annette regretted her suicide attempt. It must have hurt when she slit her wrists. She hated pain.
Pain isn't something you get used to. Heiner knew that all too well. A weak woman like her couldn't possibly endure it. Like her...
His thoughts, which had been branching out without any order, were disrupted.
A laugh escaped his lips. His large body, leaning against the wall, slid down. He lowered his head between his knees, clutching his hair with both hands as if tearing it.
He knew this was all stupid. He couldn't just turn things back to how they were just because Annette attempted suicide.
'But does that mean you want to keep pushing her into the abyss?'
He doesn't know.
In a situation where he himself couldn't come up with an answer, talking to Annette wouldn't make a difference.
It was also absurd to think that Annette might regret her suicide attempt. Heiner could read it all in her waking eyes.
Annette was in despair at being alive.
In the midst of everything being as unclear as fog, only that was certain.
That was the only reality left.
Contrary to expectations that it would contain the numerous jewels she owned, it was empty. Only a single diamond ring lay there.
It was their wedding ring.
Heiner stared blankly at it. A large diamond glittered in the darkness.
No other jewels were found in the room. This was the only one Annette currently possessed.
'On the day of the shooting, Annette said she disposed of some jewelry.'
But from what he heard, it wasn't much. So, that was all Annette had.
The amount of money she had disposed of wasn't that large, and since it was her maidenly hobby to change her jewelry, he didn't pay much attention to it.
But now that he thinks about it, it was just her organizing her belongings.
Heiner picked up the diamond ring with trembling hands.
“Where did the ring go?”
“I just took it off.”
"Just?"
“It’s meaningless now.”
Heiner looked down at his hand. Their wedding ring was still on his ring finger. He had never taken it off.
Even when he hated her deeply in his heart.
Even at times when he just wanted to kill her and feel at ease.
Even when he was making useless excuses to go to her room just to see her face.
Even when he spent countless nights loitering in the garden overlooking her room.
Heiner never took off this ring.
***
The woman lying on the bed, as if dead, was pale, but still beautiful.
With the constant care of her caregivers, Annette seemed no different than usual. She seemed ready to open her eyes at any moment if he called her, "Annette."
Heiner stared blankly at the bandage wrapped around her wrist. It seemed unusually thick on her small, thin arm.
He fiddled with the ring in his hand. He tried to put it back on, but it happened to be her left hand that was bandaged. She was also clenching her fist weakly.
It looked so precarious that he was afraid to touch it. Even if it meant simply putting a ring on it, he couldn't bring himself to touch it.
After much thought, Heiner finally put the ring back in his pocket.
The metal chair creaked. He leaned his elbows on his knees and stared intently at her face. The one he had been peeking at and yearning for for so long...
Old memories surged up like a fountain.
A little girl is sitting in the corner of a flower bed, sobbing sadly. She had a fine dress, long, neatly braided blonde hair, and glassy eyes.
“Annette.”
An opponent so dazzling and noble that just looking at him felt like a sin.
“I still... don’t know what to do.”
You're still not innocent. Even if you choose death, it doesn't replace your innocence.
So nothing is resolved between us.
If you wake up like this again, what on earth should I do?
Heiner clasped his hands together and rested his chin on them. His heart was so distraught that he could barely sit upright.
“When you wake up...”
His throat felt a little choked up. He took a shaky breath and struggled to continue speaking.
“Let’s go to Glenford.”
He couldn't say, "Let's go back to the happy times." He couldn't be sure everything would be better. He come too far for that.
“If you want to see the sea, I will let you see it.”
Nevertheless, Heiner said so.
“I’ll let you go where you want to go.”
If you want to ride a train, ride together. If you want to walk on the beach, walk together. If you want to see a painter's painting, see it together. If you want to pick up seashells on the beach, pick them up together.
“So come with me...”
Heiner reached out as if to touch her cheek. But his hand lingered in the air, unable to reach her, and he quickly withdrew.
He still hated her. He still couldn't forgive her. He still wanted revenge, and he still wanted to keep her by his side, miserable.
“So come with me.”
Nevertheless, Heiner said so.
***
It was the evening of the fourth day that Annette woke up.
Heiner, who was sitting by the bedside, flipping through the documents, keenly caught her slight movements. Her eyelashes and fingertips were fluttering delicately.
Heiner jumped up and said her name in a trembling voice.
“Annette?”
Her eyelids fluttered in response. Heiner immediately called the doctor.
“Annette, are you awake?”
Annette's eyes slowly opened. Her pupils were cloudy and unfocused. Heiner continued to speak, fearing that her eyes would close again.
“Can you hear me? Can you see me?”
Light slowly returned to her blue eyes. She blinked a couple more times. Heiner called her name again, his voice a mixture of relief and anxiety, desperate.
“Annette...!”
Annette's gaze, groping somewhere in the air, landed on him. For a moment, all her movements stopped. Her rough lips opened and closed again.
The next moment, Annette's eyes were filled with despair and discouragement.
The hands and shoulders that had been stretched out on the bed began to tremble slightly. Even the once calm breathing gradually quickened. Her eyes, moist with sadness like a young animal's, seemed to ask, "Why?"
Heiner was watching this series of changes without really noticing them.
The door burst open. Several nurses and a doctor rushed into the room. The doctor asked Heiner, who was standing at the bedside, for his understanding.
“I’ll check the patient’s condition.”
Heiner stood back, dumbfounded. He couldn't take his eyes off Annette's face as the doctor examined her.
Tears streamed down Annette's face. She shook her shoulders and sobbed in a hushed voice.
“Madam, would you please nod your head?... Madam, can you hear me? Could you please nod your head just once?”
The doctor's calm voice echoed in his head. Heiner clenched his fists, then relaxed them.
A blood-soaked bed. A body lying like a wax doll. Arms drooping. Hands rushing to administer first aid... It felt like that day was being replayed.
After performing some checks, the doctor approached Heiner.
"Well, she appears to be conscious, but her mind is quite unstable. I think we should let her rest for a while."
“...”
“...I... Commander. I think your wife needs some rest.”
Only then did Heiner turn his head creakingly toward the doctor. A belated reply flowed out.
“Oh, yes.”
“I think it would be better to leave the room empty and leave only one caregiver.”
"... Yes."
Heiner nodded, his face still stunned, even to himself. It took a few seconds for the doctor's words to sink in.
Annette was trembling, her eyes tightly shut. Tears streamed down her temples. She slowly turned around.
Even as the doctor left the room, Heiner continued to stare at her. Scenes of Annette's eyelids opening, her exposed pupils darkening, and tears welling up in her eyes played out over and over again.
A pale face gleamed through the narrowing gap in the doorway. Finally, the door closed completely. He leaned against the wall next to the door, his head slightly raised, his eyes closed. He was tired.
'I need to... talk to her.'
Even amidst the confusion, Heiner thought that. He didn't know where to start or how to proceed. He just had to do it.
He felt like he had a lot to say. He had a lot to ask and a lot to answer. She was mentally unstable... Yeah, it made sense, since she'd only just woken up.
Heiner was determined to talk to her, something he had been avoiding for a very long time.
Perhaps Annette regretted her suicide attempt. It must have hurt when she slit her wrists. She hated pain.
Pain isn't something you get used to. Heiner knew that all too well. A weak woman like her couldn't possibly endure it. Like her...
His thoughts, which had been branching out without any order, were disrupted.
A laugh escaped his lips. His large body, leaning against the wall, slid down. He lowered his head between his knees, clutching his hair with both hands as if tearing it.
He knew this was all stupid. He couldn't just turn things back to how they were just because Annette attempted suicide.
'But does that mean you want to keep pushing her into the abyss?'
He doesn't know.
In a situation where he himself couldn't come up with an answer, talking to Annette wouldn't make a difference.
It was also absurd to think that Annette might regret her suicide attempt. Heiner could read it all in her waking eyes.
Annette was in despair at being alive.
In the midst of everything being as unclear as fog, only that was certain.
That was the only reality left.
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