(82) Why am I (1)
Once Cyrus's journey with his companions was decided, the people of Maho Castle became busy. They worked frantically until late at night, packing their belongings and selecting their companions.
After a stormy hour had passed and everyone had gone to bed, Cyrus secretly went to Louis's room. Louis was just getting ready for bed when she sensed her master's presence and stood up.
Cyrus emerged from the shadows and approached Louis.
"Tomorrow..."
Louis listened to Cyrus' instructions with a serious expression.
After Cyrus finished speaking, Louis's expression was filled with questions, but she answered without asking any questions.
“I will follow your orders, my lord.”
Cyrus left Maho Castle, escorted by many people.
Cyrus, seated atop a black horse and escorted by the twin knights, Rihan and Ratello, rode without a backward glance. He didn't see those who were seeing him off, but Cyrus's eyes gleamed with a ferocity uncharacteristic of someone visiting someone he longed for.
Three days after leaving Maho Castle, an eagle flew in and landed on Cyrus' shoulder. Cyrus untied the paper tied to the eagle's ankle.
The knights swallowed dryly as they watched Cyrus' expression darken as he read the letter.
Even after reading the entire letter, Cyrus remained silent for a moment. Various emotions flashed across his pale face, then vanished.
Soon, Cyrus spoke calmly, his usual expressionless, doll-like appearance showing no emotion.
“We’ve filtered out the chaff. Let’s go back.”
The officials were stunned by the fact that the Northern Lord, whom they had expected to return months later, had returned to Maho Castle less than a week after his departure. Cyrus wasn't the type to act without reason.
As soon as Cyrus returned to Maho Castle, he summoned his subjects, from his prime minister, Duke Tessio Hern, to Marquis Hymel Brown, the royal household's butler.
Cyrus, seated on his throne, gazed blankly at the courtiers standing before him, their breath held in their lord's gaze.
Why does our lord look so upset?
Although curious, no one dared to open their mouths.
Cyrus, who had been glaring at his subjects for a while, smiled coldly, leaned back, and crossed his legs. His red lips parted, and a cold voice flowed out.
"It seems like some people here are quite taken aback by my presence. Your hearts must be pounding, aren't you?"
The subjects were bewildered, not knowing what their lord was saying. Except for one.
“This time, you must be wondering why the Northern Lord, who should have died, is sitting there in perfect health.”
Margrave Krona Hibben, Minister of the Imperial Household, opened his mouth cautiously.
"Your Excellency, what do you mean? Why would we wish for your death?"
“Marquis Hibben, how did you know I was going to the East?”
“Of course, you’re going through the city of Levnan, which is an easy route..."
The other ministers' eyes wavered. They knew that Cyrus was heading to the East by another route.
A few people, who had belatedly noticed Cyrus's thoughts, widened their eyes. The corners of Cyrus's mouth quirked up in a cold smile.
"There are many ways to get to the East. You probably knew I was taking one of them. Since I'm not going to fight there, I'll probably bring a small escort and won't be so guarded. You probably thought this would be a great opportunity to take my head."
Cyrus slowly got up.
"You must have been anxious, since I said I'd be leaving the very next day. You must have contacted them without even considering it, and they wouldn't have had time to think long before setting up an ambush..."
Cyrus slowly descended the platform and turned to his subjects.
"But the ambushers wouldn't have known. My knights were lying in wait on every road leading to the East last night."
Cyrus stopped before the Marquis of Brown. His red eyes rested on the Marquis' kind face.
“Isn’t that so, Marquis?”
The Marquis of Brown forced a smile, the corners of his mouth twitching.
“What do you mean, Your Excellency...”
"You knew I was going through Whirl Canyon, didn't you? I came to see you last night and told you I was going through Whirl Canyon."
Cyrus held the collar of Marquis Brown's uniform with both hands and smoothed it out. While Cyrus's hands were on him, the Marquis Brown remained breathless.
"Why didn't you at least talk to someone before you took on such a big task, Marquis? Then they'd know I was taking a different route. Oh, and you were in such a hurry to leave the next day, you couldn't do that?"
The Marquis of Brown fell to his knees.
“Your Excellency, I do not know what you are talking about.”
Cyrus looked down at Marquis Brown, who was speaking earnestly, with dark, sunken eyes.
The days spent with the Marquis Brown came to mind, and he felt a pang of frustration.
Cyrus barely suppressed the urge to get angry, yell, and shake him by the collar.
That won't do. If you show yourself being swayed by emotions in front of your subjects, it's over.
“You may not know, but I know.”
At the frosty voice, Marquis Brown seemed to have foreseen his future and jumped to his feet. He pulled out the dagger he had been hiding in his bosom and lunged at Cyrus.
Cyrus easily dodged the blow and subdued Marquis Brown. As he was caught and fell, Cyrus stomped hard on his back.
The Marquis of Brown cried out while lying face down.
“Cyrus! Have you forgotten what I did for you?”
Cyrus roughly grabbed the Marquis's hair, causing his neck to snap back.
“Did you really want this seat?”
“Ugh...”
Cyrus gave a cold look to Marquis Brown, whose neck was bent and unable to answer properly, and then gave an order.
“Kill them. Don’t leave anyone who follows Brown’s name behind.”
Only then did the Marquis Brown's venomous face crumble. He clung to Cyrus's leg.
"Your Excellency. Your Excellency, please... please spare my children. They don't know anything, Your Excellency. Don't you know how much they respect you?"
The Marquis of Brown's eldest son was a knight of the Royal Guard, and his second son was a royal secretary, and whenever he saw Cyrus, he would greet him with a bright smile.
“They don’t know anything now, but soon they will know everything.”
Cyrus showed no sign of any emotion.
“They will try to avenge their father, just like I did.”
"Oh, no. No. Didn't they swear allegiance to Your Excellency? They would never betray Your Excellency. Please, they..."
"Marquis."
Cyrus cut him off, as if he didn't want to hear any more.
“Didn’t you also swear allegiance to me?”
The knights seized the Marquis of Brown's arms on either side. He glared at Cyrus with his piercing eyes and cursed him.
Cyrus watched Marquis Brown being dragged away for a moment, then turned around.
The courtiers who had been watching in a daze followed Cyrus. Cyrus spoke.
“I want to be alone.”
At those words, everyone stopped walking.
Cyrus walked down the long hallway, feeling like he was walking on a blade.
Memories of the Marquis Brown and his family were laid out on a sharp blade. Blood flowed with every step. Unseen by anyone, blood wrapped itself around Cyrus's ankles.
Cyrus stopped walking and looked out the window.
The snow-covered peak of Mount Graten came into view. Looking at the azure sky above, he remembered the blue eyes that had always stared back at him so serenely. Her hair, as beautiful as the sky on a fine day, and her voice, as clear and refreshing.
-“Your Excellency is truly dignified.”
He remembered what had made him laugh, but he couldn't laugh as heartily as he had then.
Are you proud? No. I'm still afraid. That my younger self, having lost my parents and being chased, would turn me cruel.
I was curious.
What would you say if I said something like that? Would you say I'm still dignified? Or would you be disappointed in me?
Why am I thinking of you now?
As Cyrus clenched and unclenched his fist, the emotions that had been on his face vanished.
He walked towards his office, expressionless as always, the unshaken monarch of the North.
Ariana opened her eyes.
She has nightmares every night.
Everything that is happening now is a dream, and in reality, it is a nightmare that she's still the bastard of Duke Bronte.
Every time she woke up from a terrible nightmare, she couldn't tell what was a dream and what was reality. She looked around with blurry eyes, confirmed she was still in the East realm, and only then could she breathe a sigh of relief.
‘Half a year has already passed...’
Eight months have passed since she died and came back to life.
She was resurrected in February 210, arrived in the East around April, became Ariana White in June, and now it is October.
Ariana's first party as a Princess went off without a hitch, and nothing threatened her for months after that.
Isaac, who visited the East, was focusing on Sini's treatment, and Andrei, who was friendly to Ariana, left after only staying for a few days, saying something had come up in the North.
Isaac's treatment was effective, and Sini's condition was gradually improving. The bent bones were almost completely straightened, and her eyes, which had previously been unable to perceive light, were now able to withstand bright light without any discomfort.
The White family was still kind to Ariana, and Ariana had grown accustomed to accepting their kindness.
The tutors, the employees, and even Geor, who taught Ariana swordsmanship, were all kind to Ariana.
Yet, Ariana's soul still lingered in the past. Those terrible days clung to her like a tick, refusing to budge.
Ariana put on her gown and left the room. She quietly descended the stairs and headed toward the garden.
The October night was chilly, but the clear night sky was densely packed with stars, making it incredibly beautiful.
Ariana walked along a long path between flower beds and arrived at the central garden. Someone had already arrived there.
“Isaac.”
Isaac, who had been blankly staring up at the sky at Ariana's call, suddenly stood up and waved his hand loudly.
“Princess!”
Now, she's tired of changing that title, so she just let it be, but every time she was called 'Princess Consort', Cyrus came to mind, and she felt bad.
"What brings you here at this hour? Can't you sleep? I have some sleeping pills."
Seeing Isaac smile brightly calmed her mind, which had been agitated by the nightmare.
“I don’t want to take medicine. I’ll get some fresh air, and then I’ll feel sleepy.”
"Yes, it's not good to take medicine too often. Then would you like to walk together?"
Ariana wanted to be alone, but she thought walking with Isaac would be fine. Isaac is a cheerful person, and just being with him makes her feel good.
Once Cyrus's journey with his companions was decided, the people of Maho Castle became busy. They worked frantically until late at night, packing their belongings and selecting their companions.
After a stormy hour had passed and everyone had gone to bed, Cyrus secretly went to Louis's room. Louis was just getting ready for bed when she sensed her master's presence and stood up.
Cyrus emerged from the shadows and approached Louis.
"Tomorrow..."
Louis listened to Cyrus' instructions with a serious expression.
After Cyrus finished speaking, Louis's expression was filled with questions, but she answered without asking any questions.
“I will follow your orders, my lord.”
***
Cyrus left Maho Castle, escorted by many people.
Cyrus, seated atop a black horse and escorted by the twin knights, Rihan and Ratello, rode without a backward glance. He didn't see those who were seeing him off, but Cyrus's eyes gleamed with a ferocity uncharacteristic of someone visiting someone he longed for.
Three days after leaving Maho Castle, an eagle flew in and landed on Cyrus' shoulder. Cyrus untied the paper tied to the eagle's ankle.
The knights swallowed dryly as they watched Cyrus' expression darken as he read the letter.
Even after reading the entire letter, Cyrus remained silent for a moment. Various emotions flashed across his pale face, then vanished.
Soon, Cyrus spoke calmly, his usual expressionless, doll-like appearance showing no emotion.
“We’ve filtered out the chaff. Let’s go back.”
***
The officials were stunned by the fact that the Northern Lord, whom they had expected to return months later, had returned to Maho Castle less than a week after his departure. Cyrus wasn't the type to act without reason.
As soon as Cyrus returned to Maho Castle, he summoned his subjects, from his prime minister, Duke Tessio Hern, to Marquis Hymel Brown, the royal household's butler.
Cyrus, seated on his throne, gazed blankly at the courtiers standing before him, their breath held in their lord's gaze.
Why does our lord look so upset?
Although curious, no one dared to open their mouths.
Cyrus, who had been glaring at his subjects for a while, smiled coldly, leaned back, and crossed his legs. His red lips parted, and a cold voice flowed out.
"It seems like some people here are quite taken aback by my presence. Your hearts must be pounding, aren't you?"
The subjects were bewildered, not knowing what their lord was saying. Except for one.
“This time, you must be wondering why the Northern Lord, who should have died, is sitting there in perfect health.”
Margrave Krona Hibben, Minister of the Imperial Household, opened his mouth cautiously.
"Your Excellency, what do you mean? Why would we wish for your death?"
“Marquis Hibben, how did you know I was going to the East?”
“Of course, you’re going through the city of Levnan, which is an easy route..."
The other ministers' eyes wavered. They knew that Cyrus was heading to the East by another route.
A few people, who had belatedly noticed Cyrus's thoughts, widened their eyes. The corners of Cyrus's mouth quirked up in a cold smile.
"There are many ways to get to the East. You probably knew I was taking one of them. Since I'm not going to fight there, I'll probably bring a small escort and won't be so guarded. You probably thought this would be a great opportunity to take my head."
Cyrus slowly got up.
"You must have been anxious, since I said I'd be leaving the very next day. You must have contacted them without even considering it, and they wouldn't have had time to think long before setting up an ambush..."
Cyrus slowly descended the platform and turned to his subjects.
"But the ambushers wouldn't have known. My knights were lying in wait on every road leading to the East last night."
Cyrus stopped before the Marquis of Brown. His red eyes rested on the Marquis' kind face.
“Isn’t that so, Marquis?”
The Marquis of Brown forced a smile, the corners of his mouth twitching.
“What do you mean, Your Excellency...”
"You knew I was going through Whirl Canyon, didn't you? I came to see you last night and told you I was going through Whirl Canyon."
Cyrus held the collar of Marquis Brown's uniform with both hands and smoothed it out. While Cyrus's hands were on him, the Marquis Brown remained breathless.
"Why didn't you at least talk to someone before you took on such a big task, Marquis? Then they'd know I was taking a different route. Oh, and you were in such a hurry to leave the next day, you couldn't do that?"
The Marquis of Brown fell to his knees.
“Your Excellency, I do not know what you are talking about.”
Cyrus looked down at Marquis Brown, who was speaking earnestly, with dark, sunken eyes.
The days spent with the Marquis Brown came to mind, and he felt a pang of frustration.
Cyrus barely suppressed the urge to get angry, yell, and shake him by the collar.
That won't do. If you show yourself being swayed by emotions in front of your subjects, it's over.
“You may not know, but I know.”
At the frosty voice, Marquis Brown seemed to have foreseen his future and jumped to his feet. He pulled out the dagger he had been hiding in his bosom and lunged at Cyrus.
Cyrus easily dodged the blow and subdued Marquis Brown. As he was caught and fell, Cyrus stomped hard on his back.
The Marquis of Brown cried out while lying face down.
“Cyrus! Have you forgotten what I did for you?”
“I remember. I wrote it down in big letters so I wouldn't forget.”
“Did you really want this seat?”
“Ugh...”
Cyrus gave a cold look to Marquis Brown, whose neck was bent and unable to answer properly, and then gave an order.
“Kill them. Don’t leave anyone who follows Brown’s name behind.”
Only then did the Marquis Brown's venomous face crumble. He clung to Cyrus's leg.
"Your Excellency. Your Excellency, please... please spare my children. They don't know anything, Your Excellency. Don't you know how much they respect you?"
I know.
“They don’t know anything now, but soon they will know everything.”
Cyrus showed no sign of any emotion.
“They will try to avenge their father, just like I did.”
"Oh, no. No. Didn't they swear allegiance to Your Excellency? They would never betray Your Excellency. Please, they..."
"Marquis."
Cyrus cut him off, as if he didn't want to hear any more.
“Didn’t you also swear allegiance to me?”
The knights seized the Marquis of Brown's arms on either side. He glared at Cyrus with his piercing eyes and cursed him.
Cyrus watched Marquis Brown being dragged away for a moment, then turned around.
The courtiers who had been watching in a daze followed Cyrus. Cyrus spoke.
“I want to be alone.”
At those words, everyone stopped walking.
Cyrus walked down the long hallway, feeling like he was walking on a blade.
Memories of the Marquis Brown and his family were laid out on a sharp blade. Blood flowed with every step. Unseen by anyone, blood wrapped itself around Cyrus's ankles.
Cyrus stopped walking and looked out the window.
The snow-covered peak of Mount Graten came into view. Looking at the azure sky above, he remembered the blue eyes that had always stared back at him so serenely. Her hair, as beautiful as the sky on a fine day, and her voice, as clear and refreshing.
-“Your Excellency is truly dignified.”
He remembered what had made him laugh, but he couldn't laugh as heartily as he had then.
Are you proud? No. I'm still afraid. That my younger self, having lost my parents and being chased, would turn me cruel.
I was curious.
What would you say if I said something like that? Would you say I'm still dignified? Or would you be disappointed in me?
Why am I thinking of you now?
As Cyrus clenched and unclenched his fist, the emotions that had been on his face vanished.
He walked towards his office, expressionless as always, the unshaken monarch of the North.
***
Ariana opened her eyes.
She has nightmares every night.
Everything that is happening now is a dream, and in reality, it is a nightmare that she's still the bastard of Duke Bronte.
Every time she woke up from a terrible nightmare, she couldn't tell what was a dream and what was reality. She looked around with blurry eyes, confirmed she was still in the East realm, and only then could she breathe a sigh of relief.
‘Half a year has already passed...’
Eight months have passed since she died and came back to life.
She was resurrected in February 210, arrived in the East around April, became Ariana White in June, and now it is October.
Ariana's first party as a Princess went off without a hitch, and nothing threatened her for months after that.
Isaac, who visited the East, was focusing on Sini's treatment, and Andrei, who was friendly to Ariana, left after only staying for a few days, saying something had come up in the North.
Isaac's treatment was effective, and Sini's condition was gradually improving. The bent bones were almost completely straightened, and her eyes, which had previously been unable to perceive light, were now able to withstand bright light without any discomfort.
The White family was still kind to Ariana, and Ariana had grown accustomed to accepting their kindness.
The tutors, the employees, and even Geor, who taught Ariana swordsmanship, were all kind to Ariana.
Yet, Ariana's soul still lingered in the past. Those terrible days clung to her like a tick, refusing to budge.
Ariana put on her gown and left the room. She quietly descended the stairs and headed toward the garden.
The October night was chilly, but the clear night sky was densely packed with stars, making it incredibly beautiful.
Ariana walked along a long path between flower beds and arrived at the central garden. Someone had already arrived there.
“Isaac.”
Isaac, who had been blankly staring up at the sky at Ariana's call, suddenly stood up and waved his hand loudly.
“Princess!”
Isaac called Ariana “Princess” when people were around, but when they were alone, he always called her “Princess Consort.”
"What brings you here at this hour? Can't you sleep? I have some sleeping pills."
Seeing Isaac smile brightly calmed her mind, which had been agitated by the nightmare.
“I don’t want to take medicine. I’ll get some fresh air, and then I’ll feel sleepy.”
"Yes, it's not good to take medicine too often. Then would you like to walk together?"
Ariana wanted to be alone, but she thought walking with Isaac would be fine. Isaac is a cheerful person, and just being with him makes her feel good.
In previous chapters, I translated Cyrus's subordinates' address to Ariana as 'Duchess', from now on i will change it to 'Princess Consort.'
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