The little devil who had been crying and whining for two weeks and driving people crazy was sleeping soundly, which was hard to believe.
"Sorry."
“No. It’s my job to look after Ian.”
Mrs. Howard, who denied the hardships of Amelia's absence, also lost some weight.
“Rather, I should say that I didn’t do my job properly.”
“What is that...”
“Since Ian was able to regain stability only by His Majesty the Emperor’s side, His Majesty kept him by his side.”
Mrs. Howard's face looked somewhat embarrassed as she spoke. She had been by his side all day, caring for him, yet Ian hadn't been able to find love for her. It was understandable.
“...”
But it wasn't Mrs. Howard's fault. It was simply that the child felt insecure and clung to the parent's side. Amelia knew this instinctively.
“Amelia.”
Amelia stopped patting Ian's chest at the sound of her voice calling her name. Her head naturally turned. The canopy had been tied to the bedpost, so she could see Ivan emerging from the side room. In front of everyone, she had handed Ian over like a burden, only to return to avoid the gaze of others.
“Ivan.”
The man approached without a sound, yet without hesitation, and reached out to Amelia's face. Without hesitation, she surrendered her face to his hand. Ivan's fingertips gently traced Amelia's cheek and jaw.
“What was it you said you would find out?”
Ivan asked. Amelia glanced at Ian, who was sound asleep, in case he woke up, and then got up from the bed. Ivan's arm naturally wrapped around Amelia's waist.
“...Did you read it all?”
Amelia asked cautiously. Ivan nodded in response.
“It’s all true.”
Amelia pressed her forehead against Ivan's chest and whispered softly. Perhaps because the only noise around her was the child's rasping breaths, even her small voice was clearly audible to Ivan.
"There were people in the basement who looked like me. The moment someone from outside came in, they were so terrified they couldn't even see me properly."
Ivan's shirt, which Amelia had grabbed, crumpled with a rustling sound.
“And Aaron...”
“...”
“He knew all about that past, too.”
Amelia muttered.
"It's not really a big deal. We've already mixed with other bloods, and maybe we've become strangers."
Every muttered laugh was met with a hollow laugh. Amelia half-giggled and pressed her forehead against Ivan's chest.
"Now I know for sure, Ivan. Sharing blood with a noble bloodline is nothing more than a fact."
Amelia said self-helpfully. It wasn't Ivan she blamed, but it was Ivan at the same time, for he too had refused to accept Ian as his child, and had even said that he might kill him one day.
"Sorry."
“No. It’s my job to look after Ian.”
Mrs. Howard, who denied the hardships of Amelia's absence, also lost some weight.
“Rather, I should say that I didn’t do my job properly.”
“What is that...”
“Since Ian was able to regain stability only by His Majesty the Emperor’s side, His Majesty kept him by his side.”
Mrs. Howard's face looked somewhat embarrassed as she spoke. She had been by his side all day, caring for him, yet Ian hadn't been able to find love for her. It was understandable.
“...”
But it wasn't Mrs. Howard's fault. It was simply that the child felt insecure and clung to the parent's side. Amelia knew this instinctively.
“Amelia.”
Amelia stopped patting Ian's chest at the sound of her voice calling her name. Her head naturally turned. The canopy had been tied to the bedpost, so she could see Ivan emerging from the side room. In front of everyone, she had handed Ian over like a burden, only to return to avoid the gaze of others.
“Ivan.”
The man approached without a sound, yet without hesitation, and reached out to Amelia's face. Without hesitation, she surrendered her face to his hand. Ivan's fingertips gently traced Amelia's cheek and jaw.
“What was it you said you would find out?”
Ivan asked. Amelia glanced at Ian, who was sound asleep, in case he woke up, and then got up from the bed. Ivan's arm naturally wrapped around Amelia's waist.
“...Did you read it all?”
Amelia asked cautiously. Ivan nodded in response.
“It’s all true.”
Amelia pressed her forehead against Ivan's chest and whispered softly. Perhaps because the only noise around her was the child's rasping breaths, even her small voice was clearly audible to Ivan.
"There were people in the basement who looked like me. The moment someone from outside came in, they were so terrified they couldn't even see me properly."
Ivan's shirt, which Amelia had grabbed, crumpled with a rustling sound.
“And Aaron...”
“...”
“He knew all about that past, too.”
Amelia muttered.
"It's not really a big deal. We've already mixed with other bloods, and maybe we've become strangers."
Every muttered laugh was met with a hollow laugh. Amelia half-giggled and pressed her forehead against Ivan's chest.
"Now I know for sure, Ivan. Sharing blood with a noble bloodline is nothing more than a fact."
Amelia said self-helpfully. It wasn't Ivan she blamed, but it was Ivan at the same time, for he too had refused to accept Ian as his child, and had even said that he might kill him one day.
"But I still can't forgive them. That doesn't give them the right to treat me like that."
“...”
"The Russell family has blossomed into glory with the lives of my blood relatives, no, my own bloodline. And yet, you dare say it's because I was born a sin."
But Amelia seemed unaware that she had stabbed Ivan's small conscience.
“We need an opportunity to invite them to dinner.”
“Why the invitation?”
“He asked me how I was going to kill you at the celebration where Ian became Crown Prince, and I told him I'd show him in front of everyone.”
She was just acting in harmony with Ivan and thinking of making the nobles believe her lies.
“Just give me a rough estimate. I’ll take that to the celebration party.”
“I thought you were going to cry.”
Ivan spoke abruptly, but honestly. It was a different topic from what they had originally discussed.
“...”
Amelia raised her head and met Ivan's gaze. Her eyes, sunken deeper than usual, perhaps due to the lack of light, held a clear sincerity.
“I don’t want to cry.”
So Amelia also honestly confessed her true feelings.
"For me, this isn't just about following your orders. It's about protecting Ian, and it's also about avenging the survivors, including myself. I've decided to do it."
“...”
“That’s why I don’t want to cry, Ivan.”
Amelia's lips curved into a soft smile. Of all the Amelias Ivan had ever seen, she looked the strongest.
Why?
That's why he kept finding Amelia annoying. She wasn't that kind of woman by nature. So what made her like that? A thought suddenly occurred to him. The ones who took the lion's share were, of course, the Russells and Aaron.
“I’m tired now. Let’s go to sleep, Ivan.”
Just as his thoughts were deepening, Amelia grabbed Ivan's hand and pulled him closer. Ivan, without hesitation, was drawn to Amelia's touch and lay down with Ian between them.
Amelia's words of exhaustion weren't a lie; she quickly began to breathe evenly. As if she'd said everything she needed to say to Ivan, and now she could rest.
“...”
Ivan, lying face down, stared blankly at the sleeping face. He had to leave soon anyway, so he couldn't sleep like Amelia. Then, the thoughts Amelia had interrupted began to swirl again.
The Duke of Russell and Aaron were the ones who ruined Amelia. But did they alone ruin her?
Amelia hadn't blamed him even before. But if he looks at the results, Ivan wasn't much different from the Duke of Russell, who had tried to control and exploit her life. Ivan's significance to Amelia was entirely due to her love for him. If it weren't for that feeling, Amelia wouldn't have forgiven him either.
Well then, he is no different from them.
At that moment, for the first time in his life, Ivan vaguely understood what self-loathing felt like.
***
He hadn't slept all night. Perhaps it was the unfamiliar feeling that had him feeling uneasy. Ivan sat on the windowsill, gazing outside, then turned his head toward the sound. Rodan had just entered the Emperor's office early, as usual.
“Rodan.”
As soon as he closed the door and entered the room, Rodan heard Ivan calling him, and he immediately looked at Ivan.
“I’m going to invite the nobles to dinner.”
“For dinner, you say?”
Rodan rolled his eyes at the sudden request. It was a difficult request to understand. Ivan had once refused to even have tea with the Duke of Russell and others. He probably thought he'd be so upset by them all that he wouldn't even be able to lift a spoon.
“If you ask me to lay the groundwork, I have to listen.”
Ivan added matter-of-factly, hoping to clear up his doubts.
"All right."
Rodan nodded, his face perceiving that Ivan's request stemmed from Amelia's request. However, he still seemed reluctant to accept Ivan's orders regarding Amelia. However, Rodan had a duty to assist Ivan.
“But, Your Majesty.”
And he had a duty to take care of things he had forgotten.
“It’s Miss Jane Clark’s birthday soon.”
"So?"
At Ivan's question, Rodan's face flashed with a faint contempt. His gaze seemed to ask, "How could you be so rude to someone who would become your wife?" Ivan chuckled briefly at his aide's rudeness.
“I’m just kidding. Just choose the gift appropriately and send it to me.”
"Yes."
As if he hadn't expected it, Rodan answered obediently. He sat down at the desk reserved for him and began to unfold the documents. The document at the top was the purchase deed for the mansion Ivan had ordered.
“Did you buy the mansion for Amelia to stay in?”
Ivan asked.
"We've made the purchase. However, despite the great location, the facilities are outdated and need improvement. We're currently looking into the areas that need improvement."
Rodan answered obediently. His face showed that he had long since abandoned any thought of stopping Ivan. He probably knew that was more convenient for him.
"Yes."
Ivan muttered, staring blankly down at the paper with the mansion's location and floor plan. He thought it would be a nice gift for Amelia's birthday.
Last night, Ivan, who had felt self-loathing for the first time, thought long and hard about whether he had any other options.
But the conclusion was the same. There was no other way. The fact that Ivan had intended to use Amelia from the beginning remained. Moreover, if he wanted to be different from the previous Duke of Russell, who had used and then abandoned his lover and child, he would have to face Amelia with dignity. But he couldn't.
Because Amelia could never be the woman Ivan wanted as a companion.
“It doesn’t matter how much it costs, just fix it so that there is no inconvenience.”
So, ultimately, all he could give Amelia was wealth. Even if that wasn't what she wanted, it was all he could offer.
“Would you like to give her a birthday present? Tell me the date, and I can make it happen...”
“...”
“I will look into it.”
He didn't know anything; that was all.
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