IYDGMYD - Chapter 43



'I just closed my eyes for a moment and opened them again!'

I was shocked to see that everyone's seat was neatly organized except for mine.

It seemed like everyone had been up for quite some time, as there was not even a hint of sleepiness on their faces.

Even the knights had already finished preparing to depart and were eating.

I slept very late.

'When on earth did I fall asleep?'

I was surprised once by the fact that I slept so deeply, and twice by the fact that I slept for the first time in a long time without even a dream, let alone a nightmare.

But the most surprising part was that I was sleeping in the middle of people eating.

While I was sleeping with my legs stretched out, people were sitting in a circle around me and eating.

So it was like sleeping on the table.

“Why didn’t anyone wake me up?”

I asked Lamia with resentment.

She was lying next to me, drinking the leftover meat soup from yesterday.

Lamia answered calmly, munching on food.

“Oh, you’re awake? You were sleeping soundly, so the Marquis told me not to wake you.”

“Even so, you should have woken me up properly...!”

Then the chief's wife offered me a bowl of soup.

"Did you sleep well? Come on, have a bowl of soup. A hearty bowl of soup will give you the energy to move around all day."

I took the bowl without thinking.

The Utar people seemed to have no problem eating with a late sleeper like me in the middle of the table.

But Callius's men buried their faces in the bowls to avoid eye contact with me.

One of them accidentally made eye contact with me and burst out laughing, which was a huge hit.

“Pfft! Gulp! Gulp! Cough!”

I grinned and looked for Callius with my eyes.

Callius, who had been eating and talking with the chief across from me, only then noticed that I was up and smiled.

I glared and expressed my dissatisfaction.

But, as if he was interpreting my expression, he smiled gently and nodded.

'I can't even chase after him to find out why he embarrassed me by telling Lamia not to wake me up.'

With a tearful face, I asked Lamia with a glimmer of hope.

“I didn’t talk in my sleep, did I?”

Lamia blinked widely as she stuffed her cheeks with meat and chewed.

“You were talking in your sleep.”

Then, as if it were no big deal, she offered me a meal.

“Try it. The soup is so warm, it feels like all the fatigue has melted away.”

Callius, Lamia, and the people I trust here are all so indifferent!

I whispered, lowering my voice as much as possible.

“How did I sleep talk?”

“You were snoring a little. I guess you were tired.”

“I snored?”

“Yes.”

I touched my forehead in shame.

Actually, I wanted to tear my hair out, but I couldn't embarrass myself any further in front of so many people.

Lamia patted my shoulder heartily.

"Hey, why are you so embarrassed about something like that? You don't even snore. Not many people will hear you."

"Really...?"

I felt a little relieved.

Lamia urged.

“Eat quickly. If you eat well, your nose will clear up.”

“...!”

It was clear she was teasing me. When I glared at her, her face sullen and upset, Lamia chuckled playfully.

But that was already in the past.

With a sigh, I gave up and drank the soup.

I have to eat in front of people with my face still unwashed.

'Your hair must be messy too.'

I pulled the hood of my leather jacket down low.

The soup tasted like leftovers from yesterday, but contrary to my expectation that it would taste less delicious, it tasted richer and more flavorful today than yesterday.

It was a hearty taste that seemed to give me strength for the day, just like the chief's wife said.

***

After dinner, while everyone was cleaning up, I was served breakfast by the maids in a corner of the ker.

The Uttar children sat around me, keeping their distance, and watched me.

They whispered something among themselves, perhaps curious that I was getting ready to leave, and some of the children among them, still not good at controlling the volume of their voices, could clearly hear the conversation.

“I guess the Princess doesn’t know how to wash her face by herself.”

“I can wash my face by myself.”

“Shh. That’s because she's a Princess. Princesses don’t usually wash their faces alone.”

“Why?”

It was a very pure and curious conversation.

I didn't feel any ill will, but it felt a little strange.

I felt like my life habits, which I had been taught my whole life to be right and had never questioned, were being denied.

I'm a little discouraged.

"You think kids like that can wash their faces on their own? I've never washed my face on my own before..."

Even though I was looked down upon and abused, there was always a servant there to help me wash my face.

Even when my lip was split open by the Viscount Pelsus, I endured the maid's rough hands and washed my face.

I thought it was natural for it to be that way because I had lived that way.

But as I listened to the children's conversation, I wondered for the first time why I had never thought of washing my face by myself.

'There's no law that says a Princess can't wash her face alone.'

Vanessa frowned and tried to shoo the children away, perhaps annoyed by their chattering.

“You rude bastards! What dare you do in front of Her Highness the Princess?”

I beckoned Vanessa over.

“Leave it alone, Vanessa.”

"But those kids are mocking Your Highness, the Princess. And calling you a Princess is insulting. They deserve a good beating."

"There's nothing wrong with what the children said. And they just don't know the difference between a Princess and a Royal Princess."

I scolded Vanessa while the other maids combed my hair.

"You must know that, but your actions are excessive. If you act so immaturely toward children, what will people think of me?"

“...”

Vanessa, who had been hearing unpleasant things from me since yesterday, glared at me coldly.

“I will report this matter in detail to Her Majesty the Empress.”

“If you do that, she’ll be disappointed and think you’re even making useless reports.”

I didn't support it but accepted it.

I was now unhesitating in my dealings with Vanessa, having judged her to be unworthy of being watched and closely watched.

"You're so foolish, and your actions are so obvious. Kavala doesn't trust people like that."

I was keeping an eye on the other two maids, Vanessa and Lamia.

Vanessa pouted and stepped back at my words.

The balance of power between Vanessa and me had shifted in my favor, and the other two maids, sensing that Lamia had also joined me, were now slowly watching me.

'One of them is just pretending to be naive. Maybe both of them are.'

It was quite tiring to be wary of the people around you.

The Uttar children, having seen me try to stop Vanessa from chasing them away, now approached me with more confidence.

One of the children, who had been staring intently at the maids as they stroked my hair and even put on my cloak, bravely asked.

“Can’t the Princess dress herself?”

I spoke honestly to the child.

“I’ve never done that before.”

"Why?"

I asked back with a slightly bitter smile.

“Well, why?”

An unexpectedly surprising answer came from the child.

“Isn’t it because the Princess just wants to sit still?”

“You just want me to sit still?”

“Yes! If the Princess just sits there quietly and looks pretty without doing anything, wouldn’t these older sisters be comfortable?”

The child pointed to my maids.

“If the Princess moves around on your own and gets dirty, these older sisters will have to wash you again and dress you again.”

The child sighed deeply.

"I wish my younger sibling would just stay still. He's not good at anything, but he keeps trying to do everything. That makes it hard for me."

"So?"

"Yes. But Mom keeps saying my little brother should do his share, too. But sometimes it's just too much of a hassle to have to clean up after him."

It felt like I'd been hit in the head.

The child was right.

If I had tried to do things and learn things on my own, Andrea would have found it increasingly difficult to control me as I grew up.

To sit still and be pretty without doing anything.

Just making me fools who can be used for their own pleasure.

I realized from the child's words that this was exactly what Andrea and Viscount Pelsus had wanted.

I lamented my foolishness in thinking that the royal family should at least treat me, the Princess, with the minimum level of respect, just because of the royal family's prestige.


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