Episode 147. Their Way of Marriage (1)
17. Their Way of Marriage.
On the way back from meeting the Marchioness of Miliora in the South, the scenery outside the carriage window felt unfamiliar.
It wasn't because I was traveling this road for the first time, but because the person I was now, the person I had just passed, wasn't the same. It wasn't because Prince Kydel and I had begun a completely new relationship. It was because a more important, fundamental, and immense change was taking place within me.
It made me no longer the same Lorisha I used to be.
"Lorisha. I want you. I want only you. I want you to know that. I want you to believe me."
Prince Kydel's voice would whine from the depths of my heart, rise into my head, and fill me from there.
Then it would descend back into my heart, sleep, and then come back to life in the quiet of the night when no one was around.
I finally realized what words I had been longing to hear. Words I had never heard before, words I hadn't even realized I wanted to hear.
For example, someone wants me, or wants me to believe them, or loves me...
I learned that from him.
The man who sleeps with his head resting on my shoulder will never know how long his words echo in my soul.
He has never experienced a life deprived of such words.
So I won't tell him that those confessions thundered through the sky in my heart, that joy rained down through the dazzling rays of light.
And I will hold onto that secret and cherish it in my heart for the rest of my life, striving to reflect even a fraction of it back to him.
That was the best I could do as a newbie in love. Real-world problems will inevitably assault us, but now that I know he finds them ridiculous, I've decided to close my eyes tightly.
What will happen when I do...? I've decided to be ambitious for myself.
Maybe once in my life, I can do that. By the side of this man named Locard Kydel.
When we arrived at Kydel's residence and went to the Duke's study, the Duke was burning something like a letter in the fireplace.
Prince Kydel cleared his throat to distract him and said,
"Father, I'm back."
"..."
The Duke narrowed his eyes, stared at us for a moment, and then said,
"You two seem a bit different."
He had the discerning eye of an eagle.
I averted my gaze for a moment, but Prince Kydel smirked. It was clearly a suspicious smile.
"Is that so?"
I held my breath and gently tugged at my collar, but Prince Kydel continued to smile.
"The Marchioness is pregnant. The Marquis and the Marchioness are very close."
"That is a joyous matter. Please report it to His Majesty the Emperor."
"Yes, Father."
One of his hands was already patting the strap on my chest.
“Your Excellency? No, that’s not it...!”
It was late morning. Even though I was half awake, I didn’t open my eyes. It was partly because I was still a little half-asleep, and partly because I didn't want the lingering feeling of last night's afterglow, still lingering beneath my skin, tickling my entire being. This fatigue, the kind only he could give, was so strange and special. It was so utterly drowsy and sweet, I didn't feel guilty about staying up late in bed.
When I felt that he and I were one, when that lingering feeling blended with the morning sunlight, it felt like the world I knew had vanished.
When I opened my eyes, I was convinced that a world of complete happiness, safety, and complete lack was waiting for me.
I heard Prince Kydel, who had risen first, reading the accumulated letters at the table. The letters had piled up from his trip to the south, nearly filling a basket.
I squinted my eyes, peeked at him, and quickly closed them when I saw his body exposed through his loosely draped robe.
My face flushed again, my heart pounding, and I didn't know what to do with myself.
I heard him sigh softly. The worries of the world had come to this room. I hated those letters.
Most of them were invitations, letters demanding his time in some way.
The start of the academy, the all-night honeymoon, and the Crown Prince's assistant. He felt like ten bodies were not enough.
"Grand Duke Clemento's birthday party. His ninety-seventh birthday party? I've heard since I was little that he's been preparing for this as if it were his last."
Grand Duke Clemento was now the Emperor's uncle. Ninety-seven years old? For a member of the imperial family who had endured such a great tragedy, it was certainly an impressive longevity.
But honestly, I wasn't particularly impressed by the longevity of His Majesty the Emperor's uncle, so I closed my eyes tightly and pretended to sleep.
Prince Kydel said calmly,
"I know you're awake. You've been squinting at me for a while now."
"..."
"If you're really asleep... can I wake you up in my own way?"
I heard the rustle of his robe as he rose from the sofa. My eyes snapped open.
"Wake up, even if we make eye contact, you'll try to pounce on me!"
"Exactly."
He walked slowly, a crooked smile on his face. How could he have such a lecherous look in his eyes? Every time I saw him, I felt a pang of dread.
I quickly slid out of bed, threw on my robe, and ran to the door.
He let out a disbelieving.
"Ha!"
Anyway, thanks to my decisive decision, our mornings were more or less as usual.
As I dressed neatly and headed to the dining room, Prince Kydel arrived, also looking dapper. We stared at each other, chuckling as we recalled what had just happened.
The Duke, the last to arrive, spoke monotonously, seeing us.
“Lorisha. Your father-in-law is a widower.”
“Yes.”
The Duke, always extremely neat and dignified, waved his hand in the air, as if he couldn’t believe what he’d just said.
“No, you’re giving me that look in front of me... Haa, enough. Let’s eat.”
“I-I’m sorry...”
The Duke looked off into space, and I lowered my head, staring at the edge of the tablecloth, embarrassed, speechless.
But Prince Kydel leaned in innocently and whispered,
“Lorisha, my father is jealous of us.”
“Your Excellency!”
I was so overcome with emotion that I ended up pinching his thigh. Prince Kydel’s face hardened before a subtle, crooked smile broke into a sly grin.
I blushed bright red. Now, no matter what I did, he would react in a lewd way.
What was I going to do, suddenly acting like a newlywed couple in front of the Duke?
Duke Kydel stared at his son and me for a moment, then shook his head.
“It seems you enjoyed your trip south.”
Prince Kydel then stared at me intently and smiled.
“Yes, Father.”
My face flushed even more, and I lowered my eyes to check Duke Kydel’s reaction, but the Duke stared at me. The Duke said calmly,
“Locard’s mother, who went before, woke up late. She struggled to change that habit for years. It won’t happen quickly, so don’t push yourself too hard.”
“Thank you for your understanding.”
I said in a small voice, like an ant, and began eating. While Duke Kydel’s consideration was truly appreciated, I still had a hard time adjusting to the idea of a family that didn’t hate me or want to kick me out.
This was something I had to learn from the beginning, feeling like a baby.
Looking at the exquisitely handsome man sitting next to me, I felt like everything would be alright.
I wouldn't run away anymore. If I had to fight, I would fight by his side.
The Duke said to Prince Kydel,
"You will attend Grand Duke Clemento's birthday party in my stead. A secret envoy is expected from Smilean, and His Majesty has ordered the messengers to attend."
"Yes, Father."
I swallowed the food I had been chewing, feeling unnecessarily nervous. I couldn't tell the Duke whether he trusted me or ignored me, for he was so calmly revealing such confidential information in front of me.
Anyway, judging by the arrival of a secret envoy, it was clear that various negotiations between the two countries were in the final stages ahead of His Highness the Crown Prince's wedding.
This is how the royal wedding was revealed to be more of a transaction than a marriage.
"Lorisha, do you have anything to tell your father?"
"No, Your Excellency. Thank you."
I answered bashfully and continued eating.
I had to go see the Count sometime. Can I let him know that I was much happier than before...
As I thought to myself, my face flushed, and Prince Kydel glanced at me.
But I continued eating in silence.
17. Their Way of Marriage.
On the way back from meeting the Marchioness of Miliora in the South, the scenery outside the carriage window felt unfamiliar.
It wasn't because I was traveling this road for the first time, but because the person I was now, the person I had just passed, wasn't the same. It wasn't because Prince Kydel and I had begun a completely new relationship. It was because a more important, fundamental, and immense change was taking place within me.
It made me no longer the same Lorisha I used to be.
"Lorisha. I want you. I want only you. I want you to know that. I want you to believe me."
Prince Kydel's voice would whine from the depths of my heart, rise into my head, and fill me from there.
Then it would descend back into my heart, sleep, and then come back to life in the quiet of the night when no one was around.
I finally realized what words I had been longing to hear. Words I had never heard before, words I hadn't even realized I wanted to hear.
For example, someone wants me, or wants me to believe them, or loves me...
I learned that from him.
The man who sleeps with his head resting on my shoulder will never know how long his words echo in my soul.
He has never experienced a life deprived of such words.
So I won't tell him that those confessions thundered through the sky in my heart, that joy rained down through the dazzling rays of light.
And I will hold onto that secret and cherish it in my heart for the rest of my life, striving to reflect even a fraction of it back to him.
That was the best I could do as a newbie in love. Real-world problems will inevitably assault us, but now that I know he finds them ridiculous, I've decided to close my eyes tightly.
What will happen when I do...? I've decided to be ambitious for myself.
Maybe once in my life, I can do that. By the side of this man named Locard Kydel.
***
When we arrived at Kydel's residence and went to the Duke's study, the Duke was burning something like a letter in the fireplace.
Prince Kydel cleared his throat to distract him and said,
"Father, I'm back."
"..."
The Duke narrowed his eyes, stared at us for a moment, and then said,
"You two seem a bit different."
He had the discerning eye of an eagle.
I averted my gaze for a moment, but Prince Kydel smirked. It was clearly a suspicious smile.
"Is that so?"
I held my breath and gently tugged at my collar, but Prince Kydel continued to smile.
"The Marchioness is pregnant. The Marquis and the Marchioness are very close."
"That is a joyous matter. Please report it to His Majesty the Emperor."
"Yes, Father."
"Isn't Lorisha suffering from the aftereffects?"
"No, Duke. Thanks to your concern, I returned safely."
"That's fortunate. Go and rest."
When we returned to the room, Prince Kydel wrapped his arm around me and hugged me.
“My Lorisha, aren’t you feeling a bit under the influence? Then, would it be okay if I push myself a little harder?”
He wasn’t asking for my permission. He buried his nose in the nape of my neck, deliberately brushing his lips against mine as he spoke.
The soft skin tickled and burned, sending shivers down my spine.
I gently twisted my neck and said,
“I-I lied. I’m under the influence. I’m so tired I could die. If you think about it, wouldn’t you be feeling the same way, Your Excellency?”
“Oh, my poor wife...”
I groaned involuntarily. Who knew “wife” could be such a chilling word?
“Your Excellency, you must be very tired too...”
“What should I do? It seems like I’m responsible for the fatigue... How can I take responsibility...?”
"No, Duke. Thanks to your concern, I returned safely."
"That's fortunate. Go and rest."
When we returned to the room, Prince Kydel wrapped his arm around me and hugged me.
“My Lorisha, aren’t you feeling a bit under the influence? Then, would it be okay if I push myself a little harder?”
He wasn’t asking for my permission. He buried his nose in the nape of my neck, deliberately brushing his lips against mine as he spoke.
The soft skin tickled and burned, sending shivers down my spine.
I gently twisted my neck and said,
“I-I lied. I’m under the influence. I’m so tired I could die. If you think about it, wouldn’t you be feeling the same way, Your Excellency?”
“Oh, my poor wife...”
I groaned involuntarily. Who knew “wife” could be such a chilling word?
“Your Excellency, you must be very tired too...”
“What should I do? It seems like I’m responsible for the fatigue... How can I take responsibility...?”
One of his hands was already patting the strap on my chest.
“Your Excellency? No, that’s not it...!”
***
It was late morning. Even though I was half awake, I didn’t open my eyes. It was partly because I was still a little half-asleep, and partly because I didn't want the lingering feeling of last night's afterglow, still lingering beneath my skin, tickling my entire being. This fatigue, the kind only he could give, was so strange and special. It was so utterly drowsy and sweet, I didn't feel guilty about staying up late in bed.
When I felt that he and I were one, when that lingering feeling blended with the morning sunlight, it felt like the world I knew had vanished.
When I opened my eyes, I was convinced that a world of complete happiness, safety, and complete lack was waiting for me.
I heard Prince Kydel, who had risen first, reading the accumulated letters at the table. The letters had piled up from his trip to the south, nearly filling a basket.
I squinted my eyes, peeked at him, and quickly closed them when I saw his body exposed through his loosely draped robe.
My face flushed again, my heart pounding, and I didn't know what to do with myself.
I heard him sigh softly. The worries of the world had come to this room. I hated those letters.
Most of them were invitations, letters demanding his time in some way.
The start of the academy, the all-night honeymoon, and the Crown Prince's assistant. He felt like ten bodies were not enough.
"Grand Duke Clemento's birthday party. His ninety-seventh birthday party? I've heard since I was little that he's been preparing for this as if it were his last."
Grand Duke Clemento was now the Emperor's uncle. Ninety-seven years old? For a member of the imperial family who had endured such a great tragedy, it was certainly an impressive longevity.
But honestly, I wasn't particularly impressed by the longevity of His Majesty the Emperor's uncle, so I closed my eyes tightly and pretended to sleep.
Prince Kydel said calmly,
"I know you're awake. You've been squinting at me for a while now."
"..."
"If you're really asleep... can I wake you up in my own way?"
I heard the rustle of his robe as he rose from the sofa. My eyes snapped open.
"Wake up, even if we make eye contact, you'll try to pounce on me!"
"Exactly."
He walked slowly, a crooked smile on his face. How could he have such a lecherous look in his eyes? Every time I saw him, I felt a pang of dread.
I quickly slid out of bed, threw on my robe, and ran to the door.
He let out a disbelieving.
"Ha!"
Anyway, thanks to my decisive decision, our mornings were more or less as usual.
As I dressed neatly and headed to the dining room, Prince Kydel arrived, also looking dapper. We stared at each other, chuckling as we recalled what had just happened.
The Duke, the last to arrive, spoke monotonously, seeing us.
“Lorisha. Your father-in-law is a widower.”
“Yes.”
The Duke, always extremely neat and dignified, waved his hand in the air, as if he couldn’t believe what he’d just said.
“No, you’re giving me that look in front of me... Haa, enough. Let’s eat.”
“I-I’m sorry...”
The Duke looked off into space, and I lowered my head, staring at the edge of the tablecloth, embarrassed, speechless.
But Prince Kydel leaned in innocently and whispered,
“Lorisha, my father is jealous of us.”
“Your Excellency!”
I was so overcome with emotion that I ended up pinching his thigh. Prince Kydel’s face hardened before a subtle, crooked smile broke into a sly grin.
I blushed bright red. Now, no matter what I did, he would react in a lewd way.
What was I going to do, suddenly acting like a newlywed couple in front of the Duke?
Duke Kydel stared at his son and me for a moment, then shook his head.
“It seems you enjoyed your trip south.”
Prince Kydel then stared at me intently and smiled.
“Yes, Father.”
My face flushed even more, and I lowered my eyes to check Duke Kydel’s reaction, but the Duke stared at me. The Duke said calmly,
“Locard’s mother, who went before, woke up late. She struggled to change that habit for years. It won’t happen quickly, so don’t push yourself too hard.”
“Thank you for your understanding.”
I said in a small voice, like an ant, and began eating. While Duke Kydel’s consideration was truly appreciated, I still had a hard time adjusting to the idea of a family that didn’t hate me or want to kick me out.
This was something I had to learn from the beginning, feeling like a baby.
Looking at the exquisitely handsome man sitting next to me, I felt like everything would be alright.
I wouldn't run away anymore. If I had to fight, I would fight by his side.
The Duke said to Prince Kydel,
"You will attend Grand Duke Clemento's birthday party in my stead. A secret envoy is expected from Smilean, and His Majesty has ordered the messengers to attend."
"Yes, Father."
I swallowed the food I had been chewing, feeling unnecessarily nervous. I couldn't tell the Duke whether he trusted me or ignored me, for he was so calmly revealing such confidential information in front of me.
Anyway, judging by the arrival of a secret envoy, it was clear that various negotiations between the two countries were in the final stages ahead of His Highness the Crown Prince's wedding.
This is how the royal wedding was revealed to be more of a transaction than a marriage.
"Lorisha, do you have anything to tell your father?"
"No, Your Excellency. Thank you."
I answered bashfully and continued eating.
I had to go see the Count sometime. Can I let him know that I was much happier than before...
As I thought to myself, my face flushed, and Prince Kydel glanced at me.
But I continued eating in silence.
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