Be more desperate than anyone else to get a chance (2)
“Nadia, how old am I?”
“You’re twenty years old. Why do you keep asking me that?”
At the age of twenty, one year before execution.
It's not that I was lucky to survive, it's that I came back in time.
As I habitually pinched my arm, pain spread through my skin.
'It's not a dream.'
How did I get this lucky? I'm a sinner.
Nadia gently took my hand and pulled it down.
“Oh my, why does my Lady keep acting like this?”
Nadia is the nanny's daughter and she and I grew up like sisters.
Looking back, the person who truly cared about me was Nadia.
The person who silently watched over me as I lost my eyesight and became more sensitive, and the person who lost her life trying to escape me from prison with my brothers, was Nadia.
Not the only girl I thought was my friend.
Why didn't I know that back then?
It's not like I lost my hearing just because I couldn't see.
“Oh my, you’re red. What is this on your beautiful skin? You should pinch me instead... Huh?”
As I hugged Nadia, she stopped breathing, her voice full of worry.
“Oh, Miss?”
"Sorry."
“Huh? Oh, no, it’s not something you should feel sorry about...”
“I won’t make excuses for forgetting how precious you are. Thank you for being there for a difficult person like me.”
Nadia's eyes, which had been blank, quickly became moist.
She swallowed her tears several times, wiped her eyes with her sleeve, and spoke in a lively voice.
“You’re not being picky, you’re just hurt. When you’re hurt, even the slightest touch hurts. It’s wrong to accuse someone of being picky when they’re screaming in pain.”
“I am sensitive, you know.”
“That’s because you’re just staying at home. If you go out and get some fresh air, you’ll feel better.”
Since I lost my sight, I rarely went out.
I didn't want to be seen groping around with a cane.
I was afraid that I would walk around without knowing what was on my face or that my dress was dirty.
So when I was told to go out, I took it as nagging, thinking that they were teasing me.
“Yeah, I’ll go out more often from now on.”
“Thank you for your kind words. Now, close your eyes. I will put a wet towel on you.”
Nadia untied the lace and placed a wet cloth over my eyes.
The cool air cooled the heat in my eyelids.
I closed my eyes calmly and concentrated.
'I can't see anything.'
As expected, I couldn't see the future. I couldn't even feel the unique feeling of buoyancy that came whenever I used my power.
Instead of regaining my sight, I lost my powers. But I know the future.
So am I the 'first walker'?
'That can't be true.'
But it doesn't matter, right?
In the burning land of death, I prayed earnestly.
If given another chance, I would like to be born as an umbrella. To protect my family from getting a single drop of rain and then be lightly abandoned.
So if I could put the future I ruined back on the right track.
So, as long as I could atone for those who were sacrificed because of me, everything else was fine.
This must be the reason why I went back in time.
'I have to hide the fact that I have regained my sight for the time being.'
Because eyesight is the proof of power.
At least until a new 'first walker' appears, I must act as a guardian.
That way, my choices will be empowered.
'Let's finish with the Third Prince for now.'
Even though he was someone I loved so much, I was not emotionally shaken at all. I wasn't even angry.
I risked my life for such a worthless emotion.
I laughed bitterly and then sat up abruptly.
“Oh my, that’s a surprise! Miss, what’s wrong?”
“No... I just suddenly remembered something.”
There was one more thing that absolutely had to be done.
Please don't die
The man who gave me cool water in the land of the dead and hoped for me to live.
My benefactor who watched over me during my last moments.
I have to find him.
And I have to give him everything I have.
'But how do I find him?'
I don't know anything about my benefactor...
At that moment, a knock on the door, and the maid announced the visitor.
“Miss, Lady Sierra Coelho has come to visit.”
“Bring her in.”
As soon as I finished speaking, Nadia naturally covered my eyes with lace.
Again, again, again.
The sound of high heels came closer. The sweet smell of perfume wafted in through the open door.
Then, through the delicate lace, a woman with red hair and a pure white face appeared.
“Millenia! Today I...”
She was walking quickly towards me, but when she saw Nadia, she raised her eyebrows.
“Oh, Nadia is here too? Excuse me, can I have a glass of water?”
Sierra has never treated Nadia rudely before.
So I was thankful and happy for Sierra.
Because I thought she respected my request to treat Nadia like my sister.
Without even realizing that his sweet voice, like cotton candy, had an extremely arrogant and irritable expression.
As I stared at her face in amazement, Nadia silently poured her some water.
'So this isn't the first or second time this has happened.'
Sierra held her glass of water elegantly and looked down at Nadia.
“Could you please step aside? We have something important to discuss.”
“Miss, I’ll be outside.”
"Yes."
As Nadia stepped away, Sierra collapsed down next to me.
Whoosh, the scent of perfume wafted in strongly.
“Do you know how ridiculous things were for me today? You know that dress I told you about last time? Ibida stole it! I wanted it so badly!”
Obviously, she knew that I had collapsed while fasting, but she didn't say a word of concern for me.
“Nadia, how old am I?”
“You’re twenty years old. Why do you keep asking me that?”
At the age of twenty, one year before execution.
It's not that I was lucky to survive, it's that I came back in time.
As I habitually pinched my arm, pain spread through my skin.
'It's not a dream.'
How did I get this lucky? I'm a sinner.
Nadia gently took my hand and pulled it down.
“Oh my, why does my Lady keep acting like this?”
Nadia is the nanny's daughter and she and I grew up like sisters.
Looking back, the person who truly cared about me was Nadia.
The person who silently watched over me as I lost my eyesight and became more sensitive, and the person who lost her life trying to escape me from prison with my brothers, was Nadia.
Not the only girl I thought was my friend.
Why didn't I know that back then?
It's not like I lost my hearing just because I couldn't see.
“Oh my, you’re red. What is this on your beautiful skin? You should pinch me instead... Huh?”
As I hugged Nadia, she stopped breathing, her voice full of worry.
“Oh, Miss?”
"Sorry."
“Huh? Oh, no, it’s not something you should feel sorry about...”
“I won’t make excuses for forgetting how precious you are. Thank you for being there for a difficult person like me.”
Nadia's eyes, which had been blank, quickly became moist.
She swallowed her tears several times, wiped her eyes with her sleeve, and spoke in a lively voice.
“You’re not being picky, you’re just hurt. When you’re hurt, even the slightest touch hurts. It’s wrong to accuse someone of being picky when they’re screaming in pain.”
“I am sensitive, you know.”
“That’s because you’re just staying at home. If you go out and get some fresh air, you’ll feel better.”
Since I lost my sight, I rarely went out.
I didn't want to be seen groping around with a cane.
I was afraid that I would walk around without knowing what was on my face or that my dress was dirty.
So when I was told to go out, I took it as nagging, thinking that they were teasing me.
“Yeah, I’ll go out more often from now on.”
“Thank you for your kind words. Now, close your eyes. I will put a wet towel on you.”
Nadia untied the lace and placed a wet cloth over my eyes.
The cool air cooled the heat in my eyelids.
I closed my eyes calmly and concentrated.
'I can't see anything.'
As expected, I couldn't see the future. I couldn't even feel the unique feeling of buoyancy that came whenever I used my power.
Instead of regaining my sight, I lost my powers. But I know the future.
So am I the 'first walker'?
'That can't be true.'
But it doesn't matter, right?
In the burning land of death, I prayed earnestly.
If given another chance, I would like to be born as an umbrella. To protect my family from getting a single drop of rain and then be lightly abandoned.
So if I could put the future I ruined back on the right track.
So, as long as I could atone for those who were sacrificed because of me, everything else was fine.
This must be the reason why I went back in time.
'I have to hide the fact that I have regained my sight for the time being.'
Because eyesight is the proof of power.
At least until a new 'first walker' appears, I must act as a guardian.
That way, my choices will be empowered.
'Let's finish with the Third Prince for now.'
Even though he was someone I loved so much, I was not emotionally shaken at all. I wasn't even angry.
I risked my life for such a worthless emotion.
I laughed bitterly and then sat up abruptly.
“Oh my, that’s a surprise! Miss, what’s wrong?”
“No... I just suddenly remembered something.”
There was one more thing that absolutely had to be done.
Please don't die
The man who gave me cool water in the land of the dead and hoped for me to live.
My benefactor who watched over me during my last moments.
I have to find him.
And I have to give him everything I have.
'But how do I find him?'
I don't know anything about my benefactor...
At that moment, a knock on the door, and the maid announced the visitor.
“Miss, Lady Sierra Coelho has come to visit.”
“Bring her in.”
As soon as I finished speaking, Nadia naturally covered my eyes with lace.
Again, again, again.
The sound of high heels came closer. The sweet smell of perfume wafted in through the open door.
Then, through the delicate lace, a woman with red hair and a pure white face appeared.
“Millenia! Today I...”
She was walking quickly towards me, but when she saw Nadia, she raised her eyebrows.
“Oh, Nadia is here too? Excuse me, can I have a glass of water?”
Sierra has never treated Nadia rudely before.
So I was thankful and happy for Sierra.
Because I thought she respected my request to treat Nadia like my sister.
Without even realizing that his sweet voice, like cotton candy, had an extremely arrogant and irritable expression.
As I stared at her face in amazement, Nadia silently poured her some water.
'So this isn't the first or second time this has happened.'
Sierra held her glass of water elegantly and looked down at Nadia.
“Could you please step aside? We have something important to discuss.”
“Miss, I’ll be outside.”
"Yes."
As Nadia stepped away, Sierra collapsed down next to me.
Whoosh, the scent of perfume wafted in strongly.
“Do you know how ridiculous things were for me today? You know that dress I told you about last time? Ibida stole it! I wanted it so badly!”
Obviously, she knew that I had collapsed while fasting, but she didn't say a word of concern for me.
She just keeps complaining.
“So when I protested, you know what she said? He said, ‘Young Lady, do you have money to buy a dress?’ That’s what she said! It’s okay to ignore people!”
Thump!
“So when I protested, you know what she said? He said, ‘Young Lady, do you have money to buy a dress?’ That’s what she said! It’s okay to ignore people!”
Thump!
Sierra roughly put down her glass of water.
The hand waving of the fan becomes faster as the fever rises. The red hair that was styled nicely flutters.
“Haa, Millenia, how long must I live being ignored like this? I’m dying from frustration!”
Since I lost my sight, my hearing and sense of smell have become abnormally sensitive. I can smell things that other people can't, and I can tell people apart by their footsteps. But somehow, even after I regained my sight, it seemed to be the same.
The smell of Sierra's perfume made my stomach turn.
“Sierra.”
“You think so too? Wasn’t Ibida very rude to me?”
“Sit away.”
“Huh? What are you talking about? Were you thinking of something else?”
As she said that, Sierra pinched the back of my hand.
The moment her nails touched my skin, goosebumps appeared.
I couldn't stand it any longer so I jumped up.
"Why?"
“Your perfume smells terrible.”
“How much does this perfume cost to say something like that? I’m telling you, you’re being picky.”
As I walked slowly to the window, holding my cane, Sierra followed me, chattering.
“Do you know what it’s like at the boutique? She spends money like a vulgar nouveau riche. She buys things that don’t suit her, but she buys them without thinking.”
I opened the window wide. Only then could I breathe.
“Isn’t that a little funny? Your family is the richest in the empire, so I don’t understand why she brags about her money.”
She was venting her frustration and shook my arm gently while making a nasal sound.
“So, can you say something to Ibida?”
Ibida Claster. We were close friends when we were young, but we drifted apart due to some incident.
'I couldn't stand Sierra's anger anymore, so I said something to Ibida and we ended up having a falling out.'
It was the same for not only Ibida but also other people.
I thought we were definitely close, but when I looked back at some point, we had grown distant.
“You should also consider that you have become neurotic. Who else but me would please you? It is only natural that well-raised young ladies would avoid you.”
The hand waving of the fan becomes faster as the fever rises. The red hair that was styled nicely flutters.
“Haa, Millenia, how long must I live being ignored like this? I’m dying from frustration!”
Since I lost my sight, my hearing and sense of smell have become abnormally sensitive. I can smell things that other people can't, and I can tell people apart by their footsteps. But somehow, even after I regained my sight, it seemed to be the same.
The smell of Sierra's perfume made my stomach turn.
“Sierra.”
“You think so too? Wasn’t Ibida very rude to me?”
“Sit away.”
“Huh? What are you talking about? Were you thinking of something else?”
As she said that, Sierra pinched the back of my hand.
The moment her nails touched my skin, goosebumps appeared.
I couldn't stand it any longer so I jumped up.
"Why?"
“Your perfume smells terrible.”
“How much does this perfume cost to say something like that? I’m telling you, you’re being picky.”
As I walked slowly to the window, holding my cane, Sierra followed me, chattering.
“Do you know what it’s like at the boutique? She spends money like a vulgar nouveau riche. She buys things that don’t suit her, but she buys them without thinking.”
I opened the window wide. Only then could I breathe.
“Isn’t that a little funny? Your family is the richest in the empire, so I don’t understand why she brags about her money.”
She was venting her frustration and shook my arm gently while making a nasal sound.
“So, can you say something to Ibida?”
Ibida Claster. We were close friends when we were young, but we drifted apart due to some incident.
'I couldn't stand Sierra's anger anymore, so I said something to Ibida and we ended up having a falling out.'
It was the same for not only Ibida but also other people.
I thought we were definitely close, but when I looked back at some point, we had grown distant.
“You should also consider that you have become neurotic. Who else but me would please you? It is only natural that well-raised young ladies would avoid you.”
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