ICTV - Chapter 119
I change The Villain
Soon, a faint voice was heard.
"Lady Pale, can I come in?"
"Come in."
The door opened and Iris quietly stuck her head out. I gestured. After a while, Iris sat down next to me and started drinking warm milk.
"I'm afraid to be alone again today. I'm sorry."
"No, it's okay."
However, Iris repeatedly apologized to me.
"I'm really sorry."
"..."
Iris is a really warm-hearted and quick-witted child. Iris is really innocent of anything, but she can't seem to let go of her guilt because there's no one around to teach her. I remembered myself crouching around like a criminal on a day when I had done nothing wrong.
I called Iris.
"You know, Iris."
"Yes, My Lady."
"As you know I will be returning to the mansion soon. Do you want to go then too?"
"Yes?"
Iris looked blankly at me. I grinned, and Mouchet looked at us both and suddenly asked.
"Young Lady, can I go play with Taksha later?"
"Of course."
"..."
Iris pursed her lips and then lowered her head. And she spoke in a trembling voice.
"...I want to go out and play together."
"Yes. Let's play together."
I hugged them tightly, and the two children also hugged me tightly.
The three looked at each other and smiled brightly.
***
Mera got out of the carriage carrying a simple baggage. And then I, holding my weasel Belle in my arms, got off the carriage with Belial's support.
Servants and maids all cheered.
"Finally, the Lady is back!"
"Miss, welcome back!"
Becky held a fist full of rose petals and scattered them in the air. Rika, standing next to him, was even wiping away her tears.
"I'm so glad you came back safely!"
"Thanks guys."
"I'm sure only good things will happen to you two now!"
I and Belial entered the mansion with everyone's blessings. Beryl and Taksha were waiting inside the mansion. Taksha spread his arms and cried out.
"Welcome home, Lady!"
"I'm glad you still look healthy, Taksha."
Beryl bowed his head to Belial.
"Are you here?"
"Yes."
Belial said to Beryl.
"I think you can start speaking more comfortably now, older brother."
"I can't do that because there is a difference in status."
Belial spoke firmly.
"No, please make yourself comfortable."
"..."
Beryl, who was staring at Belial, soon closed his eyes.
"If you say so. I can't do it. Don't say anything else later."
"Do I look like that type of person? I'm sad, brother."
My eyes widened as I saw the two exchanging friendly words.
Beryl said as she roughly stroked my head.
"Our parents are waiting. Go up."
"Yes, brother."
Belial went up the stairs. I quickly smoothed out my messy hair and looked at Beryl again.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
"Because it's fascinating."
"Your face is the most amazing. What are you talking about?"
"What?"
Beryl smiled and put his arm around my shoulder.
"Good job."
I nodded.
"Brother too."
"Let's talk while Duke Serenity, or rather Belial, talks to our parents."
"Okay, then. Taksha, take Belle to my room."
"Yes, Miss."
The two moved to Beryl's room.
Beryl said as he placed Mont Blanc in front of me
"I also had something to do while you were away."
"What is it?"
Beryl took a sip of tea.
"Kedis's younger sister. Judith confessed to me."
"... Yes?"
Beryl said as he put down his teacup.
"After all, I told Kedis outright that we were not friends."
"Ah."
I sighed involuntarily. It's something I've always said before, but it probably has a different meaning this time.
"How did you do it?"
"Of course I refused. But she said she wouldn't give up."
"..."
"But you know, I have no intention of getting married."
"So, are you worried?"
"No."
Beryl shook his head.
"Maybe he will find out someday. " Something doesn't go as planned."
Beryl glanced at me
"I found out right away."
"..."
Beryl looked down at the round cake on the table.
"Do you remember that?"
"What?"
"We ordered and ate a piece of cake at a cafe."
"Of course, I remember."
Beryl burst out laughing.
"How funny it was to see such a dazed child only sparkle in front of something to eat."
"..."
"I thought about it then. Oh, this kid is going to be in big trouble if he is left alone. I thought he was just a kid who could barely act as a person if you chased him around and took care of him."
Beryl smiled faintly as he rested his chin.
"But when did you grow up so much?"
"..."
"Rather, you have grown to the point where you have to take care of me. Oh, my pride is hurt. I can't believe I'm being overtaken by a pumpkin like you."
Beryl joked for no reason. I covered my eyes with my furtive fingers. Beryl said to me.
"You will do well no matter which path you choose. Because my only sister has changed surprisingly."
"...Brother."
Beryl said, patting me on the shoulder.
"Congratulations on your wedding."
I couldn't bear it anymore. There was no benefit in covering my eyes with my hands. Tears ran down my cheeks. I had no choice but to speak.
"It's not the time to talk about other people's in-laws."
"What?"
"When did you change like that. ?"
Brother Beryl said as he took a bite of cake.
" I know I do not know. I thought I would stay the same forever."
"..."
"Now, let's eat cake. The chef came here after a long time and made a lot of things you like."
I nodded, cut a small piece of cake, and put it in my mouth. But my throat was so tight that it didn't go down well. I was chewing on the cake, then suddenly called out to Beryl.
"Brother."
"Why."
I said, my eyes still filled with tears.
"Please take care of me even after I get married."
"I will."
At the end of that answer. Beryl smiled so brightly that his eyes could not be seen.
***
There are days like that in life. There are times when you repeat the same daily life like a treadmill and think, 'Ah, why do I live?' or 'Is it okay to keep living like this?'
Even though I'm breathing, there are definitely moments where I can't breathe and my chest feels extremely tight, as if I'm underwater.
If someone asks me what to do when something like that happens, I honestly don't know.
But what is clear is that as much as I wonder why I live, as much as there are moments when my heart feels frustrated.
There were definitely moments when I felt fortunate to be alive and moments when my heart fluttered. Moments that are trivial but so happy and impossible to give up.
If you think that if there are bad moments, there will always be good moments, dark thoughts will disappear before you know it and you will have some strength to move forward again.
What do you do when there are no happy moments that come to mind?
Just make it right away. Each in their own way.
"I'm going to try writing again."
"Really?!"
Violet was startled. I spoke again.
"I'm a little embarrassed to say this in front of an author who has officially published something, but I'm going to try writing."
"Hey, don't you remember what I said?"
Violet said.
"I heard your writing is really interesting. If a writer who has even published an article says it's fun, then you too have potential."
"... Thank you. But I don't write to publish like I used to."
Violet's eyes widened.
"So what are you aiming for?"
"..."
I shook my head.
"Doesn't exist."
"No?"
"Yes. None."
When I was in school, I wrote to win awards, get published, and gain recognition from others, but I don't want to do that anymore. For the first time in my life, I want to write without a goal.
"I'm not going to think about momentum, probability, or anything like that. I'll just scribble whatever I want to write."
Violet said in a slightly regretful tone.
"Then you won't show it to me?"
"Huh, sorry."
"Hey, why are you sorry that you don't want to show your post? I told you, you have so many things to feel sorry for."
"Is it?"
Violet and I looked at each other and laughed.
"How are you doing these days?"
"I'm still chasing deadlines. Ah, Just a little more writing and it's complete. Let's go on a trip as soon as we finish the manuscript. Your brother and Arshan went on a trip last week. I'm dying of envy."
"But they also took Taksha, Iris, and Mouchet. It must be hectic taking care of three children."
"No, they are both of the same mental age as the kids, so they will be having fun."
"Well, I can't argue with that."
The two neatly ate the remaining cake and stood up. Violet asked as she went to get into the carriage.
"Are you ready for the wedding?"
Comments
Post a Comment