IHMED - Chapter 29 < I Want to Sleep with Him >
Having An Enemy's Baby
'Why is your face like that?'
The light in her eyes was familiar as if he had seen it before.
Kaian was sure he saw it somewhere.
As he searched his memory, he remembered the morning after she came to the castle, when she was caressing her share of tombstones in the castle catacombs.
Claudel seemed very moved and placed her hand on her heart and looked at him with a happy expression.
“The Duke is a truly wonderful person.”
Kaian's eyes widened at the unexpected words.
“Much more than I thought.”
“More than you thought?”
Meanwhile, she was curious about what she originally thought of him.
Claudel covered her cheek with her hand as if embarrassed, but answered his question.
“I think the Duke knows. You wouldn’t have heard good things about Temnes from Valmonde.”
"Hmm."
It was the same way that Rowen couldn't say anything good about Vermont, so when she said that out loud, Kaian had nothing to say.
“But the Duke is a great person.”
"Why?"
“You are ruling over such a large land.”
Claudel's eyes crossed the low fence of the garden cafe and scanned the crowded shopping district.
“You’re only five years older than me. Even when I turn 25, I can’t even imagine ruling over such a large territory.”
“That’s because I was trained as a successor.”
“Learning isn’t everything.”
It wasn't a big deal, but Kaian felt like his ears were itching. Still, he didn't hate the positive things she said about him. Never.
“It’s truly wonderful that someone like the Duke has the will to save anyone, even for no reason.”
"Is it?"
"Sure. Most nobles exploit the people of the territory but do not regard them as the same people.”
Claudel added as if she missed it.
“You might not think very well of it. The Duke of Vermont is also a pretty good Lord to the people of the territory. During the ten years of drought, almost no taxes were collected.”
Kaian felt strange.
Kaian was very upset when he heard the same answer after Claudel saved him and got seriously injured.
However, when the childish answer he gave back was unexpectedly generous, he felt like he had done something for nothing.
“Excuse me.”
"Yes."
When she got up from her seat, the storemaid took one of the boxes and handed it to Claudel.
It seemed like she had carefully selected and ordered something earlier and was planning to take it with her.
“I will help.”
"It's okay. I can do this too.”
Claudel, who looked up at the woman holding the box with both hands and matched her stride as if she had noticed her, smiled brightly.
Looking at the lips drawing a fine line, Kaian felt something urgent.
'Did I smell too many roses?'
It felt like something had gone wrong in his head.
Upon my return to Rowan Castle, Hannah greeted me.
"Lady! Did you have a good time?”
"Huh."
Hanna, who had been wearing Valmonde-style clothes, was also wearing a cool Rowen-style dress. When it came time to put together my clothes, Kaian had told her to bring a few clothes, so she diligently took care of her share and Hannah was truly the best among her maids.
“What is this?”
When Hanna asked, my eyes lit up.
“What? Take a guess.”
“If I guess correctly, will you give it to me?”
“Hehe.”
I, who couldn't wait to hear guess, quickly untied the ribbon and lifted the lid of the box.
“Wow. It's pretty.”
Inside, the pretty little dessert I had eaten at the cafe earlier was on a tiered wooden tray.
“Where did you buy this?”
“Come here. Let’s sit down and eat.”
“I’ll bring the tea quickly.”
Hannah quickly went to the castle kitchen and brought the tea.
As she gently steeped the tea leaves in hot water, the room was filled with a fragrant and sweet smell.
The smell of tea brewed and the smell of cookies covered with sugar, lemon juice, and vanilla.
Hannah munched on the dessert I brought, took a sip of tea, and gave me a thumbs up.
"It's good. Umm. Where have you been today?”
“The Duke bought me some jewelry.”
“Jewels?”
Hannah's eyes widened.
"Ha. Good for you. I must have made a mistake when loading the luggage, but the dress box was a bit flimsy, and the jewelry was nowhere to be seen, so I was worried about whether I should send a telegram to Valmonde.”
I hid my bitter feelings.
Hannah does not know that the Duke of Vermont sent me to Temnes with my empty body because he thought I would die.
Now, Hannah knew that I was sick with Herzol and that I had married off to an enemy family like a sacrificial lamb, but if she found out that I had not even brought a proper wedding gift for that reason, Hannah would have been furious.
Since it was my job to calm and appease Hannah, not the Duke of Vermont, who was the cause of this situation, I kept my mouth shut.
“But you’ve been at the jewelry store that long? Did you buy a lot?”
"No, yes. Oh, no.”
When I answered vaguely, Hannah tilted her head.
I wasn't there long, but I bought a lot, and it wasn't from a jewelry store, but from somewhere else.
“I bought the jewelry quickly.”
“Is there anything you liked?”
"Yes."
Even now that I thought about it again, I wanted to bite my tongue for telling everyone that it's was pretty.
Now I seemed to know Kaian's methods.
He was so outspoken that I felt like I could never respond half-heartedly when he spoke.
In any case, it was an established fact that my personal finances were now empty and would not live up to the reputation of the Duchess of Temnes, so I decided to be grateful that he cared about my dignity in this way.
The ancestral Duchess of Temnes is the flower of Oberon's kingdom. Because she is Princess Elise, one of the twin Princesses that the late King cherished and loved.
The previous Duchess, whom I might be compared to, was so enormous that I was very worried.
“Have you tried it? Did you choose something that suits you well?”
In fact, I almost answered 'Yes, no, yes' again, but I decided to change my mind.
“After buying jewelry, I went to a cafe. It was called the Garden Cafe and it was a very pretty place.”
“Garden cafe? Well...I can’t imagine.”
"Right? There are a lot of roses in bloom, and they set up a table among the flower bushes in the garden and sit and drink tea.”
“Wow. Are there that many flowers?”
"Yes."
I was excited to talk about the sincere response of the northerner from Valmonde.
“Hannah, I wish you had gone with me too.”
"No way. What are you saying? You should enjoy a private date with My Lord.”
"Date?"
My eyes widened.
“A date?”
Looking at me like that, Hannah laughed.
"Isn't it a date if a man buys you a gift and a gentleman escorts you for a walk, have tea, and talk together?”
"Ah...?”
Was it something like that? So we weren't just shopping for jewelry?
I also knew what a date was.
Hannah said that the maids in the castle read it from time to time, and I borrowed a thin book that I thought was interesting. The story was mainly about a Young Lady who had just made her debutante and her love affair with a handsome nobleman.
“A date is when a man asks a woman out before going on a date, right?”
Kaian made no such request at all.
Hannah swallowed the dessert she was chewing and said.
“Well, you’re already married and living in the same house, so there’s no need to make an appointment to set a date and time.”
"Date. It’s my first time.”
The corners of MY eyes lowered slightly.
“I didn’t know it was a date. I’m out of my mind.”
"No way. All you had to do was make a big mistake. It might have been better not to worry about it is your first date.”
"Is it?"
“If you are too conscious and nervous, you will only make mistakes.”
Hannah comforted Claudel.
“My Lord, he's very smitten with you. He will take you to a better place soon.”
“Is that so?”
"Sure."
My heart pounded.
'What if it's not a date?'
Once my heart started fluttering, I didn't know how to calm down.
A day spent at Rowen Castle. The day quickly became stable.
My recovery was also resilient, and I regained my former health faster than when I first started living here.
But late at night.
I was lying in bed with my eyes open because I couldn't sleep.
My illness worsened and I lost consciousness, but after taking the medicine that Kaian had saved me, I got better.
For a while, I ate and slept well.
However, my body was revived enough to recover and allow me to breathe, but now insomnia began again.
“It’s the third day.”
It had been exactly three days since I had not slept.
In the past, I wasn't feeling well and lay down in my pajamas even during the day.
Moreover, before it was discovered that I had Herzol, I was injured while hunting a crocodile and had to stay in bed to recuperate, so even if I couldn't sleep at night, I could at least take a nap if Hannah comforted me and put me to sleep during the day.
However, these days, I have meals with Kaian during the day, see doctors, practice dancing, and get my leg treated at the same time, so I don't have time to nap.
My body, which had been recovering beautifully by gaining weight, felt like it was starting to lose weight again after not sleeping well for a few days.
"Ha."
I let out a long sigh.
During my sleepless nights, the only thoughts that came to my mind were sad and painful memories.
The sight of the village in the forest, which was like a nest that had comfortably held me and Hannah, who were like baby birds when we were small, burning as if it had become a huge bonfire.
'Mom! Mom!'
How did I know?
After the fire goes out, I will never see my mom again.
I cried and stretched out my hand toward the red-hot flame, instinctively calling out to my mother over and over again.
‘Claudel, let's go.'
'Dad, no, mom! I have to go with my mom.'
Evan picked up Claudel, who was crying.
'Mommy's not here.'She won't be avoiding it.'
'Mister... My mom, dad, and my younger brother too?'
As he searched his memory, he remembered the morning after she came to the castle, when she was caressing her share of tombstones in the castle catacombs.
Claudel seemed very moved and placed her hand on her heart and looked at him with a happy expression.
“The Duke is a truly wonderful person.”
Kaian's eyes widened at the unexpected words.
“Much more than I thought.”
“More than you thought?”
Meanwhile, she was curious about what she originally thought of him.
Claudel covered her cheek with her hand as if embarrassed, but answered his question.
“I think the Duke knows. You wouldn’t have heard good things about Temnes from Valmonde.”
"Hmm."
It was the same way that Rowen couldn't say anything good about Vermont, so when she said that out loud, Kaian had nothing to say.
“But the Duke is a great person.”
"Why?"
“You are ruling over such a large land.”
Claudel's eyes crossed the low fence of the garden cafe and scanned the crowded shopping district.
“You’re only five years older than me. Even when I turn 25, I can’t even imagine ruling over such a large territory.”
“That’s because I was trained as a successor.”
“Learning isn’t everything.”
It wasn't a big deal, but Kaian felt like his ears were itching. Still, he didn't hate the positive things she said about him. Never.
“It’s truly wonderful that someone like the Duke has the will to save anyone, even for no reason.”
"Is it?"
"Sure. Most nobles exploit the people of the territory but do not regard them as the same people.”
Claudel added as if she missed it.
“You might not think very well of it. The Duke of Vermont is also a pretty good Lord to the people of the territory. During the ten years of drought, almost no taxes were collected.”
Kaian felt strange.
Kaian was very upset when he heard the same answer after Claudel saved him and got seriously injured.
However, when the childish answer he gave back was unexpectedly generous, he felt like he had done something for nothing.
“Excuse me.”
"Yes."
When she got up from her seat, the storemaid took one of the boxes and handed it to Claudel.
It seemed like she had carefully selected and ordered something earlier and was planning to take it with her.
“I will help.”
"It's okay. I can do this too.”
Claudel, who looked up at the woman holding the box with both hands and matched her stride as if she had noticed her, smiled brightly.
Looking at the lips drawing a fine line, Kaian felt something urgent.
'Did I smell too many roses?'
It felt like something had gone wrong in his head.
***
Upon my return to Rowan Castle, Hannah greeted me.
"Lady! Did you have a good time?”
"Huh."
Hanna, who had been wearing Valmonde-style clothes, was also wearing a cool Rowen-style dress. When it came time to put together my clothes, Kaian had told her to bring a few clothes, so she diligently took care of her share and Hannah was truly the best among her maids.
“What is this?”
When Hanna asked, my eyes lit up.
“What? Take a guess.”
“If I guess correctly, will you give it to me?”
“Hehe.”
I, who couldn't wait to hear guess, quickly untied the ribbon and lifted the lid of the box.
“Wow. It's pretty.”
Inside, the pretty little dessert I had eaten at the cafe earlier was on a tiered wooden tray.
“Where did you buy this?”
“Come here. Let’s sit down and eat.”
“I’ll bring the tea quickly.”
Hannah quickly went to the castle kitchen and brought the tea.
As she gently steeped the tea leaves in hot water, the room was filled with a fragrant and sweet smell.
The smell of tea brewed and the smell of cookies covered with sugar, lemon juice, and vanilla.
Hannah munched on the dessert I brought, took a sip of tea, and gave me a thumbs up.
"It's good. Umm. Where have you been today?”
“The Duke bought me some jewelry.”
“Jewels?”
Hannah's eyes widened.
"Ha. Good for you. I must have made a mistake when loading the luggage, but the dress box was a bit flimsy, and the jewelry was nowhere to be seen, so I was worried about whether I should send a telegram to Valmonde.”
I hid my bitter feelings.
Hannah does not know that the Duke of Vermont sent me to Temnes with my empty body because he thought I would die.
Now, Hannah knew that I was sick with Herzol and that I had married off to an enemy family like a sacrificial lamb, but if she found out that I had not even brought a proper wedding gift for that reason, Hannah would have been furious.
Since it was my job to calm and appease Hannah, not the Duke of Vermont, who was the cause of this situation, I kept my mouth shut.
“But you’ve been at the jewelry store that long? Did you buy a lot?”
"No, yes. Oh, no.”
When I answered vaguely, Hannah tilted her head.
I wasn't there long, but I bought a lot, and it wasn't from a jewelry store, but from somewhere else.
“I bought the jewelry quickly.”
“Is there anything you liked?”
"Yes."
Even now that I thought about it again, I wanted to bite my tongue for telling everyone that it's was pretty.
Now I seemed to know Kaian's methods.
He was so outspoken that I felt like I could never respond half-heartedly when he spoke.
In any case, it was an established fact that my personal finances were now empty and would not live up to the reputation of the Duchess of Temnes, so I decided to be grateful that he cared about my dignity in this way.
The ancestral Duchess of Temnes is the flower of Oberon's kingdom. Because she is Princess Elise, one of the twin Princesses that the late King cherished and loved.
The previous Duchess, whom I might be compared to, was so enormous that I was very worried.
“Have you tried it? Did you choose something that suits you well?”
In fact, I almost answered 'Yes, no, yes' again, but I decided to change my mind.
“After buying jewelry, I went to a cafe. It was called the Garden Cafe and it was a very pretty place.”
“Garden cafe? Well...I can’t imagine.”
"Right? There are a lot of roses in bloom, and they set up a table among the flower bushes in the garden and sit and drink tea.”
“Wow. Are there that many flowers?”
"Yes."
I was excited to talk about the sincere response of the northerner from Valmonde.
“Hannah, I wish you had gone with me too.”
"No way. What are you saying? You should enjoy a private date with My Lord.”
"Date?"
My eyes widened.
“A date?”
Looking at me like that, Hannah laughed.
"Isn't it a date if a man buys you a gift and a gentleman escorts you for a walk, have tea, and talk together?”
"Ah...?”
Was it something like that? So we weren't just shopping for jewelry?
I also knew what a date was.
Hannah said that the maids in the castle read it from time to time, and I borrowed a thin book that I thought was interesting. The story was mainly about a Young Lady who had just made her debutante and her love affair with a handsome nobleman.
“A date is when a man asks a woman out before going on a date, right?”
Kaian made no such request at all.
Hannah swallowed the dessert she was chewing and said.
“Well, you’re already married and living in the same house, so there’s no need to make an appointment to set a date and time.”
"Date. It’s my first time.”
The corners of MY eyes lowered slightly.
“I didn’t know it was a date. I’m out of my mind.”
"No way. All you had to do was make a big mistake. It might have been better not to worry about it is your first date.”
"Is it?"
“If you are too conscious and nervous, you will only make mistakes.”
Hannah comforted Claudel.
“My Lord, he's very smitten with you. He will take you to a better place soon.”
“Is that so?”
"Sure."
My heart pounded.
'What if it's not a date?'
Once my heart started fluttering, I didn't know how to calm down.
***
A day spent at Rowen Castle. The day quickly became stable.
My recovery was also resilient, and I regained my former health faster than when I first started living here.
But late at night.
I was lying in bed with my eyes open because I couldn't sleep.
My illness worsened and I lost consciousness, but after taking the medicine that Kaian had saved me, I got better.
For a while, I ate and slept well.
However, my body was revived enough to recover and allow me to breathe, but now insomnia began again.
“It’s the third day.”
It had been exactly three days since I had not slept.
In the past, I wasn't feeling well and lay down in my pajamas even during the day.
Moreover, before it was discovered that I had Herzol, I was injured while hunting a crocodile and had to stay in bed to recuperate, so even if I couldn't sleep at night, I could at least take a nap if Hannah comforted me and put me to sleep during the day.
However, these days, I have meals with Kaian during the day, see doctors, practice dancing, and get my leg treated at the same time, so I don't have time to nap.
My body, which had been recovering beautifully by gaining weight, felt like it was starting to lose weight again after not sleeping well for a few days.
"Ha."
I let out a long sigh.
During my sleepless nights, the only thoughts that came to my mind were sad and painful memories.
The sight of the village in the forest, which was like a nest that had comfortably held me and Hannah, who were like baby birds when we were small, burning as if it had become a huge bonfire.
'Mom! Mom!'
How did I know?
After the fire goes out, I will never see my mom again.
I cried and stretched out my hand toward the red-hot flame, instinctively calling out to my mother over and over again.
‘Claudel, let's go.'
'Dad, no, mom! I have to go with my mom.'
Evan picked up Claudel, who was crying.
'Mommy's not here.'She won't be avoiding it.'
'Mister... My mom, dad, and my younger brother too?'
'Then.'
That's when I made eye contact with Hannah, who was being held in Evan's other arm.
I stretched out my hand and took Hannah's hand in mine.
Just like that, Evan ran down the forest path with the young children in his arms and escaped the forest fire.
Why did he lie?
He could never argue.
Even though ten years have passed, I have not forgotten that moment at all.
I stayed up all night, reliving the night when the fire was burning hundreds or thousands of times.
As the days passed, I found it difficult to bear it.
Clink.
While eating with Kaian, I dozed off and the fork fell from my hand onto the plate with a loud sound.
“Why are you doing this? Where does it hurt?”
When I came to my senses, I was in Kaian's arms.
He raised his eyebrows angrily and was gently tapping my cheek.
But now I know.
That man's expression is not an angry face.
Even if he doesn't speak kindly to me, he is paying close attention to my needs.
“I have a favor to ask.”
“What please?”
So the words suddenly came out of my mouth.
“I want to sleep with you every day.”
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