IELNDMH - Chapter 47 < She's Not the Rebecca Back Then >
I Ended Up Living Up Next Door With My Ex-Husband
“Lillian’s heart, what is that?”
Rebecca's eyes didn't even waver the slightest bit.
“For me too... Can you tell me?”
Meanwhile, Cedric was inwardly embarrassed by the situation.
'I can't believe Rebecca directly mentioned Lillian's heart.'
As their marriage continued, Cedric thought she was pretending not to know about Lillian's heart.
And when Rebecca's attitude changed after the divorce, he attributed it to the fact that she had finally given up on winning Lillian's heart.
'Otherwise, no matter how much her affections have cooled... There's no way she could divorce the man she was once so madly obsessed with.'
But now, Rebecca was acting like someone who really didn't know what the object was.
Is that all she is?
Her next words were enough to surprise Cedric once more.
“Duke Bold has threatened me several times. He said I had to get it from you.”
“.... !”
A huge ripple rose above Cedric's blue eyes.
Rebecca trying to gain the power to control himself with his imprint.
And Duke Bold, who is trying to use his daughter to get Lillian's heart.
That was the fundamental reason why Cedric resented and stayed away from Rebecca throughout his marriage.
But I can't believe she so calmly admits that fact.
Rebecca, who was staring at Cedric's frozen face from his shock, eventually let out a soft laugh.
“Contrary to what you know, the relationship between father and daughter is not very good.”
“...”
“No, actually, it’s hard to even see us as father and daughter. My father just sees me as a tool to use to satisfy his greed.”
“That means… … .”
Could it be that all of that was something she had no choice but to do due to pressure from her father?
When that thought occurred to him, Rebecca in front of him began to look different once again.
He only thought that she was a woman who combined her power with her father to take advantage of him.
So he resented and hated her for all those years.
'But in fact, if Rebecca had been living a lonely life, being neglected by both her father and me, her husband....'
A tingling sensation slowly spread at the entrance to his heart.
While his wife was being treated so harshly by the man who was her father, what did he do?
He cruelly threw her out again and again.
The invisible door of the heart.
As if he was punishing her, he pushed her out that door and completely ignored her.
He was always there, so how did Rebecca feel when she was left alone?
“....”
When he finally reversed his stance and tried to gauge his feelings, he could not bear to speak after that.
She lives a life where no one wants her and she has nowhere to rely on.
The desperate feeling of having no choice but to drink the sea water over and over again, despite knowing that it would eventually kill her.
All the emotions she must have felt later became a dagger and sharply cut through Cedric's heart.
That little woman, how did she survive that long and terrible time of loneliness?
It felt like if he separated his lips even just a little bit, a wet noise that wasn't like him would come out.
He thought as he cleared his throat which kept getting tight.
Her actions were dismissed as obsession and evil.
Maybe all of that...
It may have been her desperate cry for someone to look at her properly.
Rebecca, who waited endlessly for an answer that never came back, eventually became twisted and broken.
'... If only I had reached out my hand first then.'
The person he was back then, who never once looked back at her.
Now, his indifference has started to hurt himself to the point where his bones ache.
Then it became even more difficult to break the silence.
It was because he felt guilty even casually speaking to her.
There was silence between the two for a while.
Rebecca's voice finally broke the silence.
“Of course, I guess you can’t tell me.”
At that calm tone, Cedric slowly lifted his head and looked at her again.
And he barely managed to get the bird off his lips.
“It’s not like that.”
“....”
“… … I just realized too late that I had never looked at you properly before.”
Rebecca, who was looking at him quietly, slowly opened her mouth again.
“But you still can’t see me properly.”
The way she said that was so kind that it felt cold.
“Maybe I just wanted to win your heart back,”
Rebecca continued, smiling softly.
“... It will just be a passing wind for a moment.”
“Rebecca, it’s not like that… … .”
"Alright. Why is a woman who acts like she can't live without you like this? She suddenly lets go of her hand and you feel empty. It's a shame...”
"....”
“Well, just a light shaking.”
Rebecca cut off Cedric's words and spoke decisively.
As if he couldn't bear this moment otherwise.
Cedric was resentful of Rebecca for denying his feelings.
But he also knew that even the slightest disappointment he felt for Rebecca was shameless.
In the end, his true feelings are being denied....
He will be punishing himself for not responding to her feelings in the end.
“I couldn’t be with you until the end, but I was still grateful for inviting me today.”
“Rebecca....”
“I’ll just go now.”
With those words, Rebecca stood up from her seat.
Cedric also got up after her, but was unable to catch Rebecca as she left, shaking his head resolutely.
She walked away for a long time.
“...In fact."
Rebecca's red shoes paused in front of the door.
“The ‘heart’ you want back is no longer here.”
“....”
“So even if you wanted to give it back, I can’t.”
Behind Rebecca's shoulder, where she slightly lowered her head, she seemed to be able to hear the sound of his self-deprecation.
“Because now I... I'm not the same Rebecca she was back then.”
***
At the same time, the Twins Princess’ parlor.
After finishing dinner, Bianca was leaning on the sofa and reading her book.
No, strictly speaking, she just had her eyes fixed on the book.
Her sheet of paper never went over. Bianca repeatedly flopped down on the sofa and sat up again.
Her nanny, looking at Bianca like that, giggled softly.
“Princess, are you having trouble concentrating?”
"Huh? Ugh, hehe....”
Bianca closed her book discreetly and glared at her nanny with her round eyes.
“Nanny, what are His Highness the Grand Duke and Her Highness the Grand Duchess talking about right now?”
Bianca's cheeks were flushed as she asked that question.
The nanny twitched her nose, thinking Bianca was cute, and answered.
“You asked that question a few minutes ago. And a few minutes before that, and a few minutes before that.”
"Oh! I did, that's right...”
“You too, Princess. Do you really like Her Highness that much?”
“...Yes, very, very much.”
It was at that time that Bianca smiled with her eyes.
A maid hurried into the drawing room.
“Princess, it seems that Her Highness has now returned to the Dark Mansion!”
"Already?"
Bianca asked, tilting her head.
'The nanny said that the happier the two spend, the longer Her Majesty will stay here? Could it be that the two of them fought again...?'
Bianca, continuing her thoughts, stuck out her lower lip and then slapped it vigorously.
“Nanny, I have to go see His Highness the Grand Duke now!”
It was too early for her to be disappointed.
Bianca ran straight toward the room Cendric was in.
When they finally entered the Great Battle, Cedric welcomed Bianca as always.
However, Bianca immediately noticed that her brother's complexion was darker than usual.
“Your Highness the Grand Duke, I can’t believe it again... Did you have a fight with Her Highness?”
Cedric shook his head in response to Bianca's worried question.
“... No, not really.”
Bianca was glad to hear that he didn't fight.
Bianca let out a short sigh of relief and continued speaking again.
“Then why... ?”
In response to the cautious question, Cedric only let out a deep sigh.
Seeing him like that, anxiety slowly returned to Bianca's heart.
"If... Her Highness doesn’t want to come back here?”
“....”
Cedric's silence was long.
Although Bianca was young, she could tell that his silence meant positivity.
In the end, the child had no choice but to go into battle with her shoulders slumped.
She held on to his nanny's hand and trudged back to her room for a long time.
"Nanny...”
Bianca looked up at the nanny with a downcast face.
Tears began to well up in the child's big eyes.
“Is there really no way to make their relationship better, Nanny?”
“Princess...”
“The only family I have is His Highness the Grand Duke and Her Highness The Grand Duchess....”
Thick teardrops fell down Bianca's cheeks as she cried.
The nanny quickly took the crying child into her arms and began to soothe her.
“Our Princess has been very upset, hasn’t she? I know, this nanny knows everything about our Princess.”
The nurse soothed Bianca with her skill, as she always did.
She patted the child's small back and stroked her still fluffy white forehead.
However, this time, the child's tear glands did not dry up at all.
For a long time. Finally, the nanny came up with a good idea and slowly opened her mouth.
“Princess, I have a good idea.”
"Huh... ?”
Bianca hastily wiped her reddened eyes with the hem of her sleeve and looked up at the nanny.
The nanny smiled softly as she looked at the child, whose round eyes were shining with curiosity as if asking when she had cried.
“Actually, there was a story I heard recently at the Dark Mansion, and it was....”
***
Meanwhile, Cedric remembered Bianca's back and let out a long sigh.
The sight of that little child slumping her shoulders and walking away.
Today alone, for the second time in a row, Cedric was faced with a back that he didn't want to see, and he was just distraught.
'The 'heart' you want to get back is no longer here. Because now I... I'm not the same Rebecca I was back then.'
As her last words came to mind, his feelings became even more painful.
Of course, he knew that Rebecca no longer loved him.
But hearing the story directly from her was more painful than he thought.
'I feel like hell... Rebecca must have felt this thousands or even tens of thousands of times because of me.'
When he thought about it like that, the pain he felt right now felt somewhat justified.
At that moment, Manakin's sad voice passed through Cedric's mind while he was trying to soothe his aching stomach.
'You idiot, you can catch her now.'
Cedric let out a faint smile.
'At that time, I approached Rebecca several times and promised myself that I would soothe her broken heart, but now I was heartbroken over rejection just once.'
Moreover, he didn't expect Rebecca's rejection.
Even though he couldn't do that today, he will go all the way until one day his true feelings reach her.
A resolution.
While doing something similar, he looked at the dark mansion out of habit.
But later, Cedric painfully regretted this moment, which he had promised to do later.
One morning, shortly after discovering that Rebecca had secretly left the castle.
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