EIITB - Chapter 12 < Because It Can't Mean Anything >
Even If It Is Trampled And Broken
She thought it was a big deal myself. Step by step, she reveals what she's been thinking and explains everything to make him understand, but it's not enough...
Because she was so anxious, she kept
omitting explanations.
"Duke, I mean..."
Hestia swallowed her dry saliva and looked at Aslan's back. The back of his neck was stiffer than before. She kept hearing rough friction sounds coming from his hand, which was wearing a gauntlet, and it gave her goosebumps.
"'Really..."
After silence, a sound like the howl of an animal came out to Aslan. Then, at some point, his body suddenly lost its strength. Aslan vomited out the arsenic he had contained.
"It's a useless story."
Aslan slowly turned around again. Aslan's face, looking at Hestia, seemed to have lost all strength for some reason. A crack appeared on his face, filled with contempt. Hestia paused for a moment at the sight of the wounded man's face peeking through them.
"It was a complete waste of time."
Leaving only those barely audible words behind, Aslan turned around and left the throne room.
This time, unlike before, the speed was so fast that Hestia couldn't even stop him.
Hestia left alone in such an empty place, unconsciously relaxed her clenched lips. She got too emotional. She blamed herself.
No. If this continues, she will become engaged to Sir Stephan again. Aslan Kalati was a card that could not be given up. This was because he was the only man in this country whom both Yorgos and the temple could keep an eye on.
"It's my fault. I shouldn't have treated Aslan like that."
She shouldn't have done that, Hestia blamed herself. She knew it was a late regret, but she couldn't help but do it. Strangely, it was difficult to maintain composure in front of Aslan, as it was with other people.
As Aslan said, he was the one who had avoided him first, and it was difficult for him to tolerate her ignoring him again.
'Thank you for letting me live in an illusion for so long.'
Perhaps, the illusion was not his, but her own. Even if he acts cold now, if he ever sincerely reaches out his hand again, he will take it.
"You must be crazy."
She was confused and couldn't control her emotions. In the last moments of her life, her heart ached, she realized that there was a huge gap between his voice that called her and his current voice, which was full of hostility...
Her heart ached.
"Would you like to come to the welcome party?"
He had Yorgos's request, so he couldn't ignore it, but he was a man who didn't like such situations, so the chances of him attending seemed very low.
Her wet sigh escaped between her lips.
"Thought...... I have to think."
She had to quickly think of another way to meet him.
However, as always, it was not easy to push away the presence of Aslan that filled her mind.
***
Aslan entered his capital residence with a stern look on his face. All the employees trembled as they were faced with an unusual expression that looked as if they were going to slaughter anyone at any moment. The only ones who seemed sane on the outside were Robert, the butler, and Dean and Martin, the two lieutenants of the Black Lions who had served Aslan as his closest associates.
The three men quickly followed behind Aslan.
"Your Excellency, what happened? It's not even a royal palace. Now, please talk calmly! Did you, by any chance, did you say something absurd about a Saintess in the temple or royal palace?"
The deputies were already looking indignant as if they had been insulted to their faces.
"Stop it. Noisy."
Aslan used his hands to lightly bite those who followed him. The deputies, who understood that he wanted to be alone, stopped without making a sound and did not follow him any further.
However, there was only one person, Robert, the butler of the Kalati Mansion, who steadfastly followed behind him and entered the room.
"Your Excellency, then what would you like to eat?"
"I have no idea. If I want to eat something, I'll call you back then."
"Yes, I understand. Then have a good rest."
Even though Aslan wasn't looking, the butler, who bowed towards him, quietly walked out of Aslan's room.
When he heard the door close behind him, Aslan threw away the helmet he was holding. It was the moment when the string of reason he was barely holding on to was suddenly broken.
The sound of a helmet falling to the floor was heard, followed by Asian's lips twisting.
"What? Marriage?"
The excitement never subsided. His wide ribcage rose and fell roughly and irregularly.
"How dare you...Tell me that."
Aslan quietly closed his eyes to calm his anger. As his anger subsided little by little, Hestia's face came to mind, as always.
This time, unlike usual, it was particularly clearer. This was because just a moment ago, he had seen her face right in front of him. Hestia has become a complete woman, unlike when she was younger.
Aslan was able to draw all the lines that made up that beautiful face in his mind as if he were a painter. As her color was added on top of the thin lines that looked as if they would crumble at any moment, Aslan felt a subtle heat gathering together.
"...You look like a damn woman."
Hot breath flowed out from between Aslan's lips along with a harsh curse. He will suffer endlessly through long, unfathomable nights. Hestia was neither a Princess nor a Saintess to Aslan.
Because she cannot mean anything, she is a woman who has taken on a greater meaning. She was just that.
He took off his heavy armor as if he was feeling stuffy, poured himself some whiskey, and lay down on the sofa.
What are all the Saintess and such? He knew full well that he was venting his anger, but if he didn't do that, he couldn't control the anger inside him, so Aslan wheezed. However, once Hestia took place in his head, he would not let it go easily.
Although he reason didn't want it, his instincts naturally reminded him of the past.
"I'm sure you've completely forgotten about that woman."
He said what he said a long time ago. And... A confession he never thought he would regret so much in his life.
Aslan's clenched teeth gained even more strength at the thought that the person who received it could not even remember it and that all his heart was left to his own.
"She's an irritating woman every time I see her."
But he gets angry when he doesn't see her again. He didn't know what to do with this contradictory feeling. Aslan wanted to relieve some of his frustration. The method that immediately came to mind was to cut down and eliminate the magical beasts like they did in the north, but it was an impossible task in the capital.
In the end, the only option he can take is solo drinking. Aslan gritted his teeth, opened the liquor cabinet, and took out a bottle of strong drink.
He emptied half of the contents of the bottle in one go, but he didn't feel intoxicated at all. Aslan realized that it was a futile effort and set down the bottle roughly.
"It would be better to just sleep."
He went straight to bed, lay down casually, and covered his eyes with his thick arms. Golden eyes disappeared under his eyelids, and his breathing slowly took his consciousness back to the past.
***
Memories wandered through the past. The first time Aslan met Hestia was 9 years ago, in 1090.
Yorgos, who suddenly ascended to the throne in December 1088, took Aslan, Duke of Kalati's only son, hostage the following year.
Aslan suddenly came to the capital alone and had no owner, so he had to live alone in an unused palace. A year of surviving alone in a place without his family, friends, subordinates, or anyone else.
The 15-year-old boy, who was living a life of surveillance in the name of protection, had no one who wanted to protect him or anyone who could take him by his side.
Just like the blood of the Duke of Kalati, Aslan was also a quiet person by nature.
"Aslan, don't trust anyone. The palace, and the new King, are faithless."
The day he left him here, his father, Wayne Kalati, left him a final message. Aslan used those words as his anchor and lived as breathlessly as possible in the royal palace.
However, Yorgos did not pay attention to him to the point where his warning was meaningless. Aslan continued to train. Because he had neither a sparring partner nor a teacher, he sometimes faced limitations, but he overcame them with sincerity. He was in the prime of his growth phase, growing day by day until his body was already comparable to that of an adult.
However, because he did not have much experience yet, sometimes certain emotions that he could not control on his own came up and tormented him.
This was especially true on days like today when the sounds of a noisy banquet were heard. For some reason, being in the room felt stuffy. So Aslan, who was taking a walk, gritted his teeth at some point. This was because the occasional sound of music or someone's voice laughing and talking kept digging into his ears even though he didn't want it to.
It was a very annoying noise to Aslan.
"You damn bastards."
Aslan swallowed his anger, clenching his fists so hard that the bones on the backs of his hands turned white. Even while they are having fun like that, my father, my subordinates, and my friends are all putting all their effort into slaying the demonic beasts that came over the mountain with winter. That is clearly pictured before my eyes.
"Everyone is having such a hard time, but they..."
And himself. A severe sense of helplessness swept over him, feeling that he was the only one trapped here and could not do anything. Aslan could not bear the feeling of self-destruction.
"I'm not doing anything."
Even if he clenches his fists, his disturbed mind cannot be controlled. For the first time since coming here, his eyes became watery.
"Whoa..."
It was when he could not overcome his worries and let out the deep sigh that he had always kept hidden inside his lips.
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