She looked up at the floating halo of light. The world surrounded by smoke gradually faded. Beyond her fading consciousness, a faint singing voice was heard. It was a melody she had heard somewhere before.
Thalia, who had been listening to the melody resonating like a slow current, unconsciously hummed the lyrics. However, only a cracked, metallic sound escaped from her throat. It felt as if the surrounding air had transformed into a sticky liquid and clung to her airway.
Thalia, gasping for breath with difficulty, soon lowered her eyelids. Immediately, a pitch-black abyss swallowed her whole. After drifting in the darkness for some time, engulfed in a helplessness that felt as if her limbs were melting, a sudden, heavy shock struck.
Thalia instinctively flinched. She wanted to open her eyes to see what had happened, but her eyelids would not budge. She struggled to twist her body to escape the crushing pressure.
Just then, strong pressure was applied to her solar plexus, and a nauseating feeling welled up inside her. She instinctively pulled her head to the side. At the same time, a bitter liquid gushed up from deep within her throat.
“Ugh...!"
Thalia clutched her convulsing abdomen and coughed repeatedly like a spasm. The dark red liquid that poured out of her mouth created an ugly stain on the carpet. As she looked down at it with blurry eyes, a low sob suddenly burrowed into her hazy consciousness.
Thalia slowly turned her gaze. Before she knew it, she was sprawled beneath the bed. Her confused expression lasted only a moment, as she spotted a large shadow cast over her head and froze, all movement. A massive beast was leaning its head over the nape of her neck, its huge body trembling slightly.
Thalia, slowly blinking her trembling eyelids, soon raised her hand and grasped the wolf's head. The direwolf then raised its head and looked down at her. As she stared blankly at the ashen face—as if seeing it for the first time in decades—hot liquid suddenly poured down onto her forehead. It was only a few seconds later that she realized it was tears. Hot tears streamed ceaselessly from the wolf's silver-blue eyes, stained with pain.
Thalia felt a chill run down her spine as she gently rubbed the wolf's cheek with her thumb. However, no matter how much she wiped it away, the tears showed no signs of stopping.
Thalia struggled to open her cracked lips.
"... Don't cry."
For some reason, those words seemed to make the wolf suffer even more. The wolf, his eyes contorted, buried his head in the nape of her neck.
Thalia, who had been staring blankly at the ceiling for a while, soon raised her heavy arm and gently patted Khan's back. She could feel his irregular heartbeat clearly beneath her palm. Suddenly, a low sob escaped her lips.
"...Don't cry, Khan. I was wrong."
The tears she thought had already dried up moistened her eyes once again. She squeezed out her remaining strength and hugged Khan tightly.
"...I was really wrong.”
The wolf, too, burrowed deeper into her embrace. Feeling the rough, panting breath soaking her neck, Thalia squeezed her eyes shut.
" I won't leave you alone again."
The wolf growled, trembling violently with its stiff, emaciated body. At the sight of Khan writhing in agony, a crack appeared in her heart that had been frozen solid. Feeling her blurry vision gradually clearing, she pressed her cheek against the wolf's forehead.
As if waking from a long and sorrowful dream, an inexplicable grief surged through her. Swallowing the tears that threatened to burst forth, Thalia cupped Khan's face in her hands and lifted it toward her. Her reflection filled his blue eyes, scattered with silver fragments. They were filled with nothing but herself. At the look that seemed to regard her as his entire world, a burning passion welled up inside her chest.
Thalia let out a long, trembling breath.
There is someone who loves her more than anything in this world.
Therefore, she decided to live a little longer.
***
Before we knew it, the long and chaotic summer had passed, and the season of the wind was just around the corner.
Thalia carefully draped the thick brush over her shoulders and took a deep breath.
The humid air of midsummer had vanished without a trace, and the scent of dry, clear meadows filled the castle.
Thalia, who had been sitting on the windowsill gazing at the hills and fields fading to a light brown, soon lowered her gaze. As if waiting for her eyes to fall, the direwolf lying on the floor suddenly lifted its head and pricked up its ears. Thalia reached out, gently stroked Khan's head, and rose from her seat to leave the room.
After her confinement, which had lasted for several weeks, was lifted, Thalia began to freely roam the castle grounds with Khan every morning and evening. Although not only the nobles residing in Raedgo Castle but even the servants would cast disapproving glances at her, she did not pay much attention to it.
She poured all her heart into caring for Khan, as if to compensate for the neglect she had caused him. She applied ointment to his broken toenails and cracked soles, which were a result of the rampage he had caused while confined, and carefully groomed his dull, gray fur, while also having the servants bring him fatty meat to feed him herself.
However, Khan was reluctant to eat. It seemed he had been quite shocked by the sight of her lying unconscious while under the influence of drugs.
To appease the wolf, who paid his full attention solely to her every move, Thalia tried her best to appear as normal as possible. When it was time to eat, she would sit at the table and force herself to eat, and on nice days, she would go out into the garden to enjoy a walk. Sometimes, she would take Khan to the grave of the dead child to spend some peaceful time.
Perhaps due to such efforts, Khan gradually regained his former self. As if deciding that he no longer needed to monitor her all day, there were times when he would suddenly disappear, leaving her behind while she was fast asleep.
Her heart sank when she first saw Khan's empty seat, but she relaxed when he returned as if nothing had happened and stuck close to her side.
Khan will not leave her.
Even when she tried to abandon him in a cruel way, Khan loved her unconditionally. He watched over her pain, sorrow, and suffering from the closest proximity, sharing every moment with her. Now, Khan had become a being to her who held a meaning beyond the reincarnation of a dead child. Whenever she leaned against Khan to fall asleep, she could forget all her torment.
Pushing the reality surrounding her to the far side of her consciousness, she immersed herself solely in the time she spent with Khan. It felt as though nothing could hurt her as long as she remained within his blue eyes. Whenever she was lost in such tranquility, Tiuran’s words would often come to mind: that even the most piercing pain gradually wears away with the passage of time, eventually shrinking to a bearable size.
Will the towering peak I am feeling right now also fade away someday?
It felt like she could endure it no matter how long it took until all the pain dulled, as long as Khan was by jer side.
Thalia affectionately stroked Khan, who was following her like a shadow, and stepped out of the castle.
Chilly air flowed through the wide-open space. She slowly looked around the garden and backyard, which seemed to have been completely empty in just a few days.
Since Barcas had set out on another expedition, Raedgo Castle had become noticeably quiet. Perhaps because a large number of soldiers had left the castle, even the usually noisy parade ground seemed enveloped in silence. Thalia looked up at the castle walls and soon began walking along the path.
Just then, a loud noise was heard from the direction of the castle gate. Thalia looked puzzled as she watched a group of servants hurrying across the garden.
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