ATTNH - Chapter 5

- Episode 5

The King promised to visit in the near future and left Mont Palace.

Adelheid did not come out of the building for several days.

Naturally, Dominic also became alone. He was glad about it, and from now on, it was a book.

Dominic casually flipped through the book without much thought and paused.

The selected page was slightly crumpled as if it had been left open for a long time, and one paragraph had a straight underline.

[Because it is a regrettable era, I have seen and learned many things. In this age, there is oppression, violence, and loss. And there are submissive humans. However, no one has been granted the right to discuss the right and wrong of subjugation.]

Dominic stared at the sentences for a long time. He flipped through the pages one after another, skimming them.

Not long after, another underlined passage appeared.

[Only when infinite emptiness settles in does man realize the meaning of thought. Right and wrong both pursue a single purpose. To think. There is neither morality nor great cause in it.]

[Because it is a bare soul, it is pure; because it is a fragile being, it is essential. Sometimes, the insignificant and small are close to the archetype. Only when we reach that do we transcend death. Death is...]

[Everything is beautiful because it did not happen.]

Adelheid said that she does not enjoy reading.

Could the ladies-in-waiting freely enter and exit the study?

Dominic hesitated for a moment, then returned to the first page and began reading the text.

The more he looked at the meticulously drawn underlines and the comments attached next to them—though they were nothing more than a series of words—the more curious he became about the other person.

He was deeply focused when he heard footsteps at the entrance.

He took his eyes off the paper and turned his head. The person who entered asked cautiously.

"...Are you the captain?"

It was a voice he hadn't heard in a long time. And it wasn't a pleasant voice.

Adelheid's adornment, seen for the first time, seemed like it hadn't been done.

Because she always looked nearly perfect, even indoors when the King was not present.

The loosely tied blonde hair covered the chest, and some slightly tangled strands were tucked behind the ears.

The white dress with exposed shoulders looked somewhat disheveled.

Adelheid smiled, her eyes crinkling at the corners, as she watched Dominic, who was flustered by the unexpected uninvited guest.

"Long time no see."

"..."

“Did you disturb me?”

You interrupted. However, Dominic did not voice that thought. Instead, he chose to leave.

Just as he bowed and was about to naturally stand up from his seat, Adelheid's words stopped him.

"Why are you leaving? Just stay."

"...I was originally planning to go in now."

"Were you reading that?"

Adelheid ignored Dominic's words and mentioned the book he was holding.

Dominic answered by giving a vague nod. She laughed silently.

“Does it fit well?”

"... Yes."

"That doesn't really look like it."

Adelheid was right. In Dominic's view, *On Loss* was excessively pessimistic and cynical.

They disguised it with plausible sentences pretending otherwise, but stirred up and exposed the ugly inner nature of humanity.

He hated submission. He believed that the only thing in the world to which humans must submit was natural phenomena, and that in fact, even those must be resisted.

Dominic went through many things that seemed impossible.

Seemingly impossible training, seemingly impossible trials, seemingly impossible battles, seemingly impossible absolute power. And the slaying of the seemingly impossible dragon.

However, he did not submit to them. He finally saw it through and got what he wanted.

Submission was something only the weak did.

The only thing Dominic agreed with in this book was the single sentence, "Everything is beautiful because it did not happen."

“In what way is it bad?”

"It portrays humans... in a humiliating way."

"Humans are all inherently humiliated. There is no need to be humiliated because the situation does not allow it. It's just that there isn't any."

"..."

"Captain, have you never experienced a situation like that?"

"There are many. But I did not choose humiliation."

"Then that is the Captain's world. But my world isn't like the Captain's."

"There is no situation that must be humiliating unless it is for the sake of greater morality and values."

"Well, I don't know. How can you be sure of that?"

"They choose humiliation because they want to walk a more comfortable and better path."

"Even in a life-or-death situation?"

"There are many in the world who possess values more precious than life itself. For the thinking human being described in this book willingly walks the difficult path."

“I always think.”

Adelheid added.

"But it's humiliating."

Dominic wanted to refute it. Adelheid herself knows that her actions are humiliating; that too is part of a choice made for an easier and better path. That she chose humiliation to live, chose humiliation to gain status, and chose humiliation to be loved.

There were always options there, such as death, independence, or cutting off love.

It is said that Adelheid herself ruled out all those options and chose humiliation.

"Just because you don't know about something doesn't mean it doesn't exist in the world. My humiliation stems from what you do not know."

The reason Dominic could not say any of this was that Adelheid was calling his actions a humiliation.

She smiled as if she knew nothing of the world's hardships.

She walked as if she knew how to be loved, and spoke as if she were loved.

However, Adelheid was now calling all of it a humiliation. Dominic was confused.

Humiliation is not a difficult thing, but it was difficult to call insults a humiliation.

It was something he had thought about ever since they first met, but Adelheid's words had a strange quality that touched him.

It was the same now. Even though he didn't want to exchange a word with her, he had gotten swept up in the conversation and was having this kind of discussion. It was a topic he had never even imagined.

Dominic talked with her until late at night. He talked about war, about loss, about reason, and about all kinds of people who caused it.

It was rare for their positions to narrow, but Dominic had no choice but to admit it. Adelheid was a thinker.

"Learning and doing are different. Likewise, obedience and conformity are different. Since we do not know what our unthinking bodies are capable of, I simply do the best I can. Therefore, Captain, you cannot simply label my humiliation as a humiliation..."

She had contemplated deeply for a long time. She knew desire for satisfying pain much better than Dominic did.

Even in the parts Dominic could not agree with, her numerous struggles were visible.

That is why he could understand it even more. Why would someone who had contemplated so much choose humiliation?

After hesitating for a long time, Adelheid asked as if spitting out the words she had been holding back.

"Is the war completely over?"

Dominic was momentarily flustered. The end of the war was something even a child outside the castle knew.

However, Adelheid's face looked extremely serious.

“...It’s over. Quite a while ago.”

"I see..."

Didn't anyone tell her that the war was over?

No, putting aside whether they informed her or not, post-war Fenomes were literally in a festive mood.

There is no way they wouldn't know. They were simply immersed in the comfortable life inside the palace and unable to look outside. Did you not even think about it?

"...Do you have no intention of returning to Henburg?"

Even though it had fallen, Adelheid was a member of the royal family of Henburg.

However, she was living as the consort of an enemy nation. Regardless of the fact that Henburg was an enemy of Genomes, Dominic thought that she should at least have a minimum of pride as royalty.

If you are royalty, isn't it only right to dream of returning to your own country or to strive for the reconstruction of the nation?

Isn't it a humiliation in itself to live as the consort of the one who destroyed your country?

Adelheid smiled as if she knew what Dominic was thinking. She spoke in her usual coquettish voice.

“If I say this, the Captain will probably hate me, but...”

"..."

"I don't lie here."

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