Episode 17. A Mess?!
It hadn't been long since the carriage left Valois Manor. Outside the window, the noble district toward the Imperial Palace unfolded. As the afternoon drew to a close, long shadows were cast over the street.
Lanterns began to light up one by one. The carriage was silent. The Duke of Ashford sat opposite him with his eyes closed. Leon couldn't tell if he was tired or deep in thought. His father had always been like that. Even with his eyes closed, no one could tell what was happening inside.
Leon looked out the window. The street passed by. But the street didn't register in his eyes. Something else was on his mind. Leon tried to erase it. While looking out the window, while organizing the conversation they had in the study today. The Golden Lion Merchant Guild. The Empress. The Imperial Sword. He had to think about these things. These were the important ones.
How the Duke of Ashford should move, how far the Imperial Palace could verify, and how to cooperate with the Valois family. But something else kept intruding on his mind. What a mess. Leon recalled that word again. The moment the tea spilled onto his thigh, the words that came out of her mouth. Hard words to believe had come from a noble princess sprang out as if nothing had happened. And before Leon could even deal with them, the hem of her skirt came. Quickly. Without hesitation.
Tap, tap. Leon tried to erase that sensation. It wouldn't go away. It wasn't even over the sleeve. This time, the hem of her skirt touched his thigh directly. To be precise, it was over his pants. A skirt over his pants. Yet, that pressure, that warmth, would not disappear from Leon's mind. Leon looked out the window. Why is she doing this? He thought to himself. What this woman had done was absurd. Where in the world is there a Princess who wipes the thigh of the heir to the Empire's most powerful ducal family with her skirt?
Common sense dictated. Yet, that absurdity did not make Leon uncomfortable. The fact that it didn't make him uncomfortable was what was unpleasant. Rather, it was more uncomfortable that the action felt so natural. As if that were just how she was supposed to be. As if it were only natural to wipe it with the nearest cloth when tea spills. Leon looked at his thigh. It was already completely dry. Yet, why did it still feel as if he could sense warmth from it?
Leon shifted his gaze to the window. "What a mess." He heard those words again. The Duke of Ashford, who was sitting across from him with his eyes closed, knew that Leon was frozen inside the carriage. Though his eyes were closed, he was not sleeping. He could sense, without even opening his eyes, his son looking out the window, stopping, stopping, looking out the window again, and stopping. He could also sense that his son's ears were still slightly red.
The Duke of Ashford waited a moment before opening his eyes. Leon was looking out the window. The Duke said.
"You said you wanted to break off the engagement, so I let you."
Leon turned his head. The Duke looked at Leon and said.
"Does it come back to you?"
Leon looked at his father for a moment. His gaze was calm. It was not a judgmental look. It was simply a questioning look. It had been like that for a long time. The Duke of Ashford was not someone who forced answers upon his son. He was someone who asked and waited. Leon turned his gaze back to the window and spoke.
"It's not that I just thought of it again."
"Then."
Leon chose his words for a moment before speaking.
"It seems Serena has become a completely different person since the broken engagement."
The Duke remained silent.
"She isn't the person I knew. No, I'm not sure if she was the person I knew from the beginning."
Leon continued.
"She is so different that it is hard to believe the Serena I saw during the engagement and the Serena over there right now are the same person."
"How?"
Leon thought for a moment. It was strangely difficult to put into words how she was different.
"Before, whenever I was nearby, she would always be either nervous or pushy. But now, she seems like someone who doesn't care whether I'm there or not. She thinks about how the food was made while eating, and thinks about the usefulness of lavender in the kitchen while looking at the garden."
The Duke said.
"And."
"And she said, 'This is a mess."
The Duke paused briefly before speaking, "What do you mean?"
"That's what she said when I spilled the tea."
The Duke looked at Leon. Leon spoke while looking out the window.
"For such words to come out of the mouth of a noble princess. And so casually. They just came out. Without a hint of surprise."
The Duke remained silent for a moment. Leon continued.
"It's not that I'm thinking about it again. But I'm just curious because it feels like she's become a stranger I don't know."
The noble district passed by outside the window. Leon finished speaking while watching it. Just curious. After the words left his lips, Leon briefly wondered if it was true. Was he curious? Or something else? Was there something else hidden within that mere curiosity? He couldn't quite distinguish.
Leon tried to let those thoughts drift out the window. The carriage fell silent again. Streetlights outside were turning on one by one. Duke Ashford glanced at Leon's profile. His son was looking out the window. His face was expressionless. However, the Duke knew. That when this child had no expression, it was the time he was thinking the most. It had been like that since he was young. He had grown up without learning how to express his emotions outwardly. He knew that it was partly his own fault. The Ashford family was just that kind of family. A family that teaches firmness and composure, believing that revealing emotion is a weakness. But today. As he boarded the carriage, his son's ears were red. The Duke saw it.
Then he looked at Siegfried. As Siegfried stood by the footrest outside the carriage, their eyes met. Siegfried nodded very slightly, almost imperceptible. Then he grinned. Receiving that smile, the Duke turned his gaze back into the carriage. Leon was still looking out the window. The Duke glanced at his profile and smiled quietly. Leon hadn't noticed it because he was gazing out the window. The Duke closed his eyes again.
As the carriage sped along, Leon retraced his steps back to today. Tea time in the garden. Serena, sitting opposite him, looked at the lavender flowerbed and said, "I planted lavender. It serves as a herb and smells nice." It still felt strange that those words had come from Serena's lips. The Serena Leon knew was not someone who viewed the garden with such eyes. She saw it as an object of appreciation, not as something useful. Yet, this woman plants lavender while thinking about using it in the kitchen. And she reads the ledgers. They say that if you manage a household, you must look at the ledgers. That saying felt so natural. As if she had lived that way her entire life.
Leon recounted those conversations one by one, wondering when Serena had changed. There were rumors that it was right after the broken engagement. There were also claims that it was when the family began to decline. Whichever it was, he could not know what the trigger was. There wasn't always a reason for a person to change. Sometimes they just changed for no reason. But it was rare to see someone change to this extent.
Leon looked out the window and thought. There was something Serena had said earlier at tea time. "Does seeing me make you uncomfortable?" she asked when Leon replied that it would be a lie to say he was comfortable. "Then, Young Master, you must have something to hide. Is it because you broke off the engagement?" Those words struck a chord with Leon. Yet, it was accurate. If Leon had something that made him uncomfortable, it was likely that very thing. It was Leon who had announced the cancellation of the engagement.
When Serena had yelled at him in public, Leon took it as an insult to himself and decided to break off the engagement. And now. That same Serena was wiping Leon's thigh with her skirt. "You aren't very wet." She had become someone who would say that and put down the teapot as if nothing had happened.
Leon looked out the window, then looked at his thigh. It was completely dry. But why did it still feel like he could sense warmth here? As soon as Leon realized that thought was crossing his mind, he abruptly turned his gaze out the window. What a mess. That word came to mind again. Leon rolled the word around in his head. It was a remark made by a noble princess. And in front of the heir to the Empire's most powerful ducal family. Without even blinking. A word that had reflexively spewed out the moment the tea spilled. He should have been offended. Even without bringing up the dignity of the nobility, it was a situation where she should have at least been surprised, flustered, or apologized. Yet, after spitting out that word, Serena immediately began wiping it with her skirt.
The sequence. Leon thought. The sequence was strange. Without fluster, without apology, without explanation. She just moved on to the resolution. Wiping it because it was wet, and wiping it with her skirt because it was the closest cloth available-that was all. It was as if she were treating a completely different person.
Leon had said that earlier; Serena did not react at all upon hearing those words. She simply looked at the flowerbed. She looked at the lavender seedlings. That lack of reaction made Leon even more uncomfortable. A lack of reaction meant she didn't care. The point was that no matter what Leon said or how he looked at it, it didn't matter to Serena. That was it.
Leon thought about why that made him uncomfortable. In the past, Serena would react whenever Leon said something. Whether positive or negative. She was self-conscious when Leon was nearby. That sometimes made Leon uncomfortable, but at least she knew he was there. Now, Serena seemed to not care whether Leon was there or not. Even if Leon spoke curtly, or asked if she was trying to flirt with him. She would drink tea, look at the flowerbeds, or talk about the ledgers. She just did her own thing: "You bark, I do my job." That phrase came to mind again.
Leon recalled the moment he heard it. Serena had spoken in a low, almost muttering tone. It was a monologue. But Leon heard it. And as if trying to explain something, she suddenly mimicked barking with her own mouth and laughed. She laughed. At Leon. That laugh was brief, but it was genuine. It wasn't a forced laugh. It was just the laughter of someone who found the situation amusing. When Leon saw that laughter, he felt something stop. In his mind. Just for a brief moment.
Leon looked out the window and felt his ears burning again. He covered his ears with his hands. They were cold. His hands were cold. His ears were hot. Leon lowered his hands. Why am I acting like this? He thought that to himself again. They said it was curiosity. That was the right word. He was curious about how Serena Valois could have changed so much. It was nothing more than that.
She was his ex-fiancée. It was already over. He was simply curious. Leon reached that conclusion and looked out the window. The carriage sped away. His ears were still slightly hot. Leon ignored it.
Before the carriage stopped, the Duke of Ashford opened his eyes and spoke.
"Leon."
Leon looked at his father. The Duke said.
"That princess in the study today."
"Yes."
"She read the ledgers quite fast."
Leon was silent for a moment, then spoke.
"She did."
"And I saw everyone freeze when the Golden Lion Merchant Guild was mentioned. She was the only one who remained calm."
Leon recalled that scene. He was right. When the name Golden Lion Merchant Guild was mentioned in the study, Edward froze, Claude slowly set down his ledger, and Leon himself tightened his grip. Serena was the one who had brought up that name. And she organized the documents. The Duke said.
"Where did that Princess find that out?"
Leon said.
"I don't know. I think she traced it back by analyzing the ledgers brought from the estate."
"The Princess of Valois?"
"That family went to the estate themselves. They found the real ledgers in the warehouse."
The Duke looked thoughtful for a moment.
"There are more than a few things that have changed."
Leon did not answer. The carriage came to a complete stop. The door opened. Siegfried was waiting outside. The Duke got out first and looked at Siegfried. Siegfried silently asked the Duke.
"How was it?"
The Duke looked at Siegfried and smiled. Siegfried received that smile, and his eyes widened. The Duke was already walking into the mansion. Leon got out of the carriage and looked at Siegfried.
"What is it?"
Siegfried quickly composed his expression.
"Nothing, Young Master."
"What did Father say?"
"Nothing."
Leon looked at Siegfried. Siegfried wore the exact same expression as his father, looking most like the Duke. Expressionless, calm, and staring straight ahead. Leon looked at Siegfried one more time before walking into the mansion.
Watching Leon's retreating figure, Siegfried took out his notebook and jotted it down. The Young Master covered his ears with his hands. Inside the carriage. I saw it with my own eyes. This was truly the first time he had seen something like this.
Then, pausing briefly, he added. "The Young Master said he was curious."
The difference between being curious and being something else is just a sheet of paper, but it seems the Young Master hasn't seen that paper yet. Siegfried closed his notebook. And as he followed him into the mansion, he muttered quietly.
"It won't take long, Young Master."
It was a remark no one heard.
[Siegfried's Internal Report Episode 17]
Visited Valois Manor today.
Report 1: Princess Valois told Duke Ashford, "No news is good news, as for me, I'm still the same." The Duke chuckled. It was the first time I had seen the Duke smile today.
Report 2: There was a meeting in the study. The Golden Lion Merchant Guild. The merchant guild of the Empress's family. Princess Valois mentioned that name. While the study fell silent, the Princess organized her documents. She is a strange person.
Report 3. The Young Master had tea time with Princess Valois in the garden. I watched from behind a tree. A lady-in-waiting named Lucy was also behind the same tree. We were each taking notes in our notebooks when our eyes met.
Report 4: The young lady spilled the tea. She said, "What a mess." Then she wiped it up with her skirt. The young master's ears turned red. In the ten years I have been by his side, I have never seen his ears turn red. Today is the first time.
Report 5: During the carriage return, the young master covered his ears with his hands. Alone inside the carriage. I saw it with my own eyes. This, too, is the first time. The young master told his father. He said it wasn't that he was thinking about it again. He said he was just curious because she felt like a stranger; he's curious.
I have been by the young master's side for ten years. The young master has never said that he is curious about anyone. Not once. Not enemies, not allies, not colleagues. To say one is curious means to care. To say one cares is more than that.
The young master still hasn't been able to see that single piece of paper. It doesn't seem like it will take long.
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