I don't remember exactly how I got into the underground waterway.
All I can recall is the sight of the hotel building's roof collapsing before my eyes, red flames bursting forth like a blooming flower. It was a stark contrast to the fireworks that adorned the sky. Unlike the fireworks that shot from below, illuminating the dark night sky and bringing joy, these blasts descended from the sky, blackening the ground and instilling despair.
I'd been swept away by the aftershock and hit my head. My ears were ringing, not in my head. The shock of the blast was so numbing that, even as I stared at the inferno engulfed in flames, I'd uttered transcendental sentiments like, "It's collapsing," and "People are falling." Despite witnessing undeniable misfortune, I felt no emotion. The behavioral guidelines I'd been trained to follow as a member of the royal family were completely lost. My hair had turned white, and I felt like a paper figure, led here by Johanna's hand. My head ached, and my skin prickled.
The place I was in was a place where construction on an underground subway had been halted due to the war. I spent a long time recalling this fact. It was dark and cold.
I hugged my knees, my body trembling.
“Princess, Prince. Open your mouths and cover your ears.”
As soon as Johanna finished speaking, a loud noise and vibration descended from the ground, shaking my entire body. I closed my eyes, lost in the unreality of time.
“Are you coming to your senses?”
When I opened my eyes again, Johanna, who was holding a sobbing Daniel, was looking at me with a worried expression. I must have lost consciousness. Her uniform coat was draped over my shoulders as I crouched down. I asked.
“Johanna, where did everyone go? Ted, Milia, Barbara...”
Johanna's eyebrows drooped sadly, forming a diagonal line. She seemed to be struggling with how to answer my question.
“...They’ll be okay.”
“No, I want to know where you went. We have to go back together.”
I was a little out of my mind. I kept repeating strange questions, like errors, until I suddenly came to my senses.
"Ah."
They were inside a bombed-out hotel building. I clutched my pounding head. The roar that had been crushing the city had suddenly quieted. The cries and groans of those taking refuge in the sewers were so bleak that I stood up, as if recoiling.
“Johanna. How long has it been?”
"It's been about three hours since you fainted, Princess. It's still too dangerous to go out."
Perhaps it was because I was so shocked that I lost my mind, but all I could think about was saving them. Their lives were in this world, not mine. Even if I died, there was still a slight chance I'd return to my original world. So, I had to save them.
“I’ll be back.”
“No, Princess! Come to your senses!”
She held me with one hand. She swayed back and forth, seemingly struggling to hold Daniel, but she refused to let go.
“I’ll be back soon. Wait here with Prince Hessen.”
“I’ll go myself, please stay here.”
Johanna clung to me, pleading, but I shook my head and insisted. Like a broken record player, I kept repeating that I'd be back. After a long struggle, she grabbed my shoulder, making it painful, and tried her best to persuade me.
“Princess Diana, you are the only heir to the throne.”
“So what? I have to bring them.”
"I'll go with you, too. You're my precious friend, Princess. Actually, this is the bigger reason for me."
Finally, Johanna, unable to break my stubbornness, smiled ruefully. She left Daniel in the care of a noblewoman sitting nearby and followed me. I walked through the musty underground passageway, emerging aboveground, and lost myself for a moment.
A completely different world unfolded before me than it had been just a few hours ago. A sharp, acrid air pierced me. My eyes stung, my skin tingled. The world, thick with black smoke, was as dark as an underground chamber, and the streets burned like dry logs in a furnace. Even in winter, a blazing heat surged from every corner. Sweat trickled down my back, and breathing became increasingly difficult. Johanna, holding my hand, led me to a nearby faucet, soaking a handkerchief and my uniform coat before handing them to me.
“The smoke is bad, and there are chemicals in the air, so you need to block it with this.”
I walked, wearing a wet coat and covering my nose and mouth, enduring the lingering toxic fumes and heat. The collapsed buildings were charred and hideous, their steel supports exposed and bent like taffy. Even the streetlights were all toppled. The sight of Loganfield, the beautiful capital of Medea, swept under the ravages of catastrophe was utterly disheartening.
“You’ll be okay, you’ll be okay.”
I muttered as if I was wishing, trying to ignore the bodies strewn along the roadside.
Occasionally, I saw corpses that seemed to be soldiers and police officers. I nearly fell several times, my legs giving out as I saw figures that looked like black charcoal but were presumed to be children. The pungent smell stung my nose, and I gagged when I realized it was the smell of burning people. Everything before my eyes was red and dark. Cars and carriages were ablaze. No matter where I looked, there was nothing untouched. Horses, engulfed in flames, tied to carriages, thrashed and screamed. Amidst the impassable flames, I heard screams and groans begging for help.
My nose was burning, and tears were streaming down my face. It was hard to breathe, but I groped my way back. I couldn't figure out where I was going. The signs were so warped and melted in the heat that I couldn't read them. I lost my way halfway through, but I found my way back by following what seemed to be a coffee shop that Noah and I frequented.
“Danger! There may be unexploded ordnance, so please go to a shelter immediately!”
Rescue workers and firefighters, pouring sand to extinguish the fire, shouted at us. I spotted the large bell from the church Dr. Rugen used to attend rolling on the floor. I knew we were almost there, so I quickened my pace. My throat ached. I stood dumbfounded before the charred remains of the collapsed building. Just moments ago, this had been the largest and most luxurious hotel in Medea. The bodies that had fallen to their deaths seemed relatively unharmed. The others were indistinguishable from human remains to charcoal.
“Barbara! Ted! Millia!”
Although there was absolutely no hope, I desperately called out to them, clinging to even a glimmer of hope. Johanna also tried to help me find them. I searched for a long time, but no survivors were visible. No answer came. As befitting a country with a rainy winter, the air was damp, as if rain were about to fall. Johanna's expression gradually darkened.
"Princess, they may have evacuated elsewhere, so let's go back now. The Frogen dropped a Moneta bomb, also known as Hellfire, along with high explosives. It won't go out until it's completely consumed, and if it comes into contact with water, the fire will spread even further and release additional toxic substances."
"I know."
That kind of thing happened where I lived, too. I answered nonchalantly and continued to look around without giving up.
Then, I spotted a woman's hand protruding from beneath the rubble. It was a pale hand, clutching a charred cloth. A bracelet, like mine, was wrapped around her wrist. Barbara's smile as she handed me the bracelet, saying it was a birthday present, made my blood run cold.
“Barbara?”
I reached out beneath the shattered remains of a pillar and called out her name. As soon as I felt the slightest twitch in my fingers, I quickly stood up.
“I found Barbara, Johanna!”
“Princess! Your hand hurts!”
I was foolishly trying to lift the heavy debris. Only after hearing Johanna's shriek did I realize the excruciating pain and pull my hand away. The marble was so hot I couldn't even touch it. My palms were red, as if I'd been burned. It was dizzyingly painful and stinging. Am I trapped in this blazing heat?
“She’s still alive. I think we need to lift her out.”
"Understood, Princess. I'll find something that can serve as leverage."
Johanna wedged a good piece of wood lying nearby under the pillar. Two people grabbed it and tried to lift it with all their might, but it wouldn't budge.
“Barbara, just hold on a second. I’ll get it out for you.”
I tried several times, but nothing worked. I tried to call for help, but there was no one around to help. Barbara, Milia, and Ted were likely down there, too. I gritted my teeth, unable to contain my helplessness and frustration.
“Why doesn’t it work?”
How can I endure this harsh reality, where miracles are unthinkable? Why does it show me a reality even more horrifying than the one I know?
A cold drop of water fell and flowed down my flushed cheek. The sky, indifferent, was pouring black rain. The flames grew fiercer and spread wider. The rain should have extinguished the fire, but it was spreading even wider. Whoever created this must be the devil. I wish that devil would burn to death in the eternal flames of karma. My head was spinning, and my breathing was suffocating. The pressure that was squeezing my lungs made my mind dizzy.
“Princess, we must escape before it rains more!”
I tried to hold Barbara's hand again, but I didn't feel the same faint movement as before. It felt utterly empty, like an empty shell, containing nothing.
“It can’t be done, it can’t be done. It can’t be done.”
When I came to, I was roughly digging the ground. Blood flowed from my broken fingernails, scraping the floor.
“We have to go quickly!”
Johanna, her nose pinched and coughing, grabbed my arm and forcibly pulled me up. I kept looking back, still held by her. The remaining supports, barely holding the building together, crumbled away. A blazing flame, so fierce it seemed like it would melt my corneas just by looking at it, raged. I muttered in despair, watching the raging inferno, threatening to engulf everything around me.
“We have to go together...”
There are people out there who were kind to me. I failed to save them. After all my will and thoughts to save them became meaningless, I became like an idiot, completely lost.
I felt no emotion. When I returned to the ruined Tempshire Palace after encountering the soldiers who had been searching for me, the pale Queen embraced me and took a long, deep breath. I still didn't cry.
Loganfield, the beautiful and sophisticated capital of Medea, was reduced to ruins, with few buildings remaining intact. Many people died, lost their families, and lost their homes. The survivors' primary task was to dig through the rubble to find the bodies. They prayed they were gone, but at least hoped to find traces of their loved ones so they could hold funerals.
The Tempshire Palace wasn't spared from the bombing either. The historic royal palace was destroyed, and the garden where Noah and I were married was charred to ash. The Queen and I moved to Blair Palace in Colin City, which was undamaged. Johanna and I received treatment for burns, respiratory therapy, and eardrum damage. Every breath I take, perhaps from the smoke and toxic fumes, feels like a prickling sensation in my lungs.
Fortunately, the others had fled to the bunker beneath the palace as soon as they heard the air raid warning, so they were safe. Henry said he had a hard time carrying Boaz as he tried to find me. Daniel said he was in a lot of pain from the shock of that day. I haven't slept properly since then. Strangely, I wasn't hungry. I wasn't sad, nor was I angry.
Was this the result of cornering Frogen and the war corporations? Or was it the retaliation of the capitalists who suffered losses? Was it a warning from the world to me, who was complacent and ignorant of a similar history? Whatever the reason, it feels like it's my fault.
I threw down the newspaper with the meaningless article about Ted and Milia, who died while rescuing people, receiving a promotion and a medal for their distinguished service, and fell into bed.
“Are you bored?”
I heard Ted's playful voice and hastily sat up. Barbara, Milia, and Ted were standing at the head of the bed, looking at me with their usual expressions. I shook my head in relief.
"No. We're all together, so how could we be bored? I just had a bad dream."
Milia looked worried.
“Princess, but alcohol and sleeping pills are not allowed.”
“Yes, Milia.”
I readily answered. Only then did she smile. Soon, Barbara's spirited voice was heard.
"I can't tell you how happy I am to be your friend, Princess. Stay healthy and well."
I asked them, who smiled affectionately, feeling strange.
“Where are you going?”
I opened my eyes with a start, feeling my entire body sink under the bed. I quickly tried to grasp reality. Boaz, who was curled up next to me, licked my cheek with a worried look. I hugged the back of his neck.
“Boaz, I couldn’t save them.”
I was back in a harsh reality that I wished was just a dream. My dear ones had died. A crushing sense of helplessness gripped me, and I realized it was too late. They were my friends, my precious people. They had been kind and gentle to my wary self. Whatever the reason, it didn't matter. Barbara had protected me, even when I was the target of criticism, and had even taken the time to vent her anger. Milia had worried about me, never taking vacation days, and always staying by my side. Ted had sacrificed his own sleep to spend time with me when I couldn't sleep. They always prioritized my heart and emotions, so they understood my sadness even when I smiled innocently.
It wasn't a favor I could take for granted simply because I was a Princess. I had once again made the mistake of losing something only to realize its value. Will all the kind and caring people leave, leaving only the devil behind?
“This world is hell.”
I felt like the world was turned upside down. I looked up at the high ceiling painting and locked eyes with the angel in it. I let out a silent scream.
All I can recall is the sight of the hotel building's roof collapsing before my eyes, red flames bursting forth like a blooming flower. It was a stark contrast to the fireworks that adorned the sky. Unlike the fireworks that shot from below, illuminating the dark night sky and bringing joy, these blasts descended from the sky, blackening the ground and instilling despair.
I'd been swept away by the aftershock and hit my head. My ears were ringing, not in my head. The shock of the blast was so numbing that, even as I stared at the inferno engulfed in flames, I'd uttered transcendental sentiments like, "It's collapsing," and "People are falling." Despite witnessing undeniable misfortune, I felt no emotion. The behavioral guidelines I'd been trained to follow as a member of the royal family were completely lost. My hair had turned white, and I felt like a paper figure, led here by Johanna's hand. My head ached, and my skin prickled.
The place I was in was a place where construction on an underground subway had been halted due to the war. I spent a long time recalling this fact. It was dark and cold.
I hugged my knees, my body trembling.
“Princess, Prince. Open your mouths and cover your ears.”
As soon as Johanna finished speaking, a loud noise and vibration descended from the ground, shaking my entire body. I closed my eyes, lost in the unreality of time.
“Are you coming to your senses?”
When I opened my eyes again, Johanna, who was holding a sobbing Daniel, was looking at me with a worried expression. I must have lost consciousness. Her uniform coat was draped over my shoulders as I crouched down. I asked.
“Johanna, where did everyone go? Ted, Milia, Barbara...”
Johanna's eyebrows drooped sadly, forming a diagonal line. She seemed to be struggling with how to answer my question.
“...They’ll be okay.”
“No, I want to know where you went. We have to go back together.”
I was a little out of my mind. I kept repeating strange questions, like errors, until I suddenly came to my senses.
"Ah."
They were inside a bombed-out hotel building. I clutched my pounding head. The roar that had been crushing the city had suddenly quieted. The cries and groans of those taking refuge in the sewers were so bleak that I stood up, as if recoiling.
“Johanna. How long has it been?”
"It's been about three hours since you fainted, Princess. It's still too dangerous to go out."
Perhaps it was because I was so shocked that I lost my mind, but all I could think about was saving them. Their lives were in this world, not mine. Even if I died, there was still a slight chance I'd return to my original world. So, I had to save them.
“I’ll be back.”
“No, Princess! Come to your senses!”
She held me with one hand. She swayed back and forth, seemingly struggling to hold Daniel, but she refused to let go.
“I’ll be back soon. Wait here with Prince Hessen.”
“I’ll go myself, please stay here.”
Johanna clung to me, pleading, but I shook my head and insisted. Like a broken record player, I kept repeating that I'd be back. After a long struggle, she grabbed my shoulder, making it painful, and tried her best to persuade me.
“Princess Diana, you are the only heir to the throne.”
“So what? I have to bring them.”
"I'll go with you, too. You're my precious friend, Princess. Actually, this is the bigger reason for me."
Finally, Johanna, unable to break my stubbornness, smiled ruefully. She left Daniel in the care of a noblewoman sitting nearby and followed me. I walked through the musty underground passageway, emerging aboveground, and lost myself for a moment.
A completely different world unfolded before me than it had been just a few hours ago. A sharp, acrid air pierced me. My eyes stung, my skin tingled. The world, thick with black smoke, was as dark as an underground chamber, and the streets burned like dry logs in a furnace. Even in winter, a blazing heat surged from every corner. Sweat trickled down my back, and breathing became increasingly difficult. Johanna, holding my hand, led me to a nearby faucet, soaking a handkerchief and my uniform coat before handing them to me.
“The smoke is bad, and there are chemicals in the air, so you need to block it with this.”
I walked, wearing a wet coat and covering my nose and mouth, enduring the lingering toxic fumes and heat. The collapsed buildings were charred and hideous, their steel supports exposed and bent like taffy. Even the streetlights were all toppled. The sight of Loganfield, the beautiful capital of Medea, swept under the ravages of catastrophe was utterly disheartening.
“You’ll be okay, you’ll be okay.”
I muttered as if I was wishing, trying to ignore the bodies strewn along the roadside.
Occasionally, I saw corpses that seemed to be soldiers and police officers. I nearly fell several times, my legs giving out as I saw figures that looked like black charcoal but were presumed to be children. The pungent smell stung my nose, and I gagged when I realized it was the smell of burning people. Everything before my eyes was red and dark. Cars and carriages were ablaze. No matter where I looked, there was nothing untouched. Horses, engulfed in flames, tied to carriages, thrashed and screamed. Amidst the impassable flames, I heard screams and groans begging for help.
My nose was burning, and tears were streaming down my face. It was hard to breathe, but I groped my way back. I couldn't figure out where I was going. The signs were so warped and melted in the heat that I couldn't read them. I lost my way halfway through, but I found my way back by following what seemed to be a coffee shop that Noah and I frequented.
“Danger! There may be unexploded ordnance, so please go to a shelter immediately!”
Rescue workers and firefighters, pouring sand to extinguish the fire, shouted at us. I spotted the large bell from the church Dr. Rugen used to attend rolling on the floor. I knew we were almost there, so I quickened my pace. My throat ached. I stood dumbfounded before the charred remains of the collapsed building. Just moments ago, this had been the largest and most luxurious hotel in Medea. The bodies that had fallen to their deaths seemed relatively unharmed. The others were indistinguishable from human remains to charcoal.
“Barbara! Ted! Millia!”
Although there was absolutely no hope, I desperately called out to them, clinging to even a glimmer of hope. Johanna also tried to help me find them. I searched for a long time, but no survivors were visible. No answer came. As befitting a country with a rainy winter, the air was damp, as if rain were about to fall. Johanna's expression gradually darkened.
"Princess, they may have evacuated elsewhere, so let's go back now. The Frogen dropped a Moneta bomb, also known as Hellfire, along with high explosives. It won't go out until it's completely consumed, and if it comes into contact with water, the fire will spread even further and release additional toxic substances."
"I know."
That kind of thing happened where I lived, too. I answered nonchalantly and continued to look around without giving up.
Then, I spotted a woman's hand protruding from beneath the rubble. It was a pale hand, clutching a charred cloth. A bracelet, like mine, was wrapped around her wrist. Barbara's smile as she handed me the bracelet, saying it was a birthday present, made my blood run cold.
“Barbara?”
I reached out beneath the shattered remains of a pillar and called out her name. As soon as I felt the slightest twitch in my fingers, I quickly stood up.
“I found Barbara, Johanna!”
“Princess! Your hand hurts!”
I was foolishly trying to lift the heavy debris. Only after hearing Johanna's shriek did I realize the excruciating pain and pull my hand away. The marble was so hot I couldn't even touch it. My palms were red, as if I'd been burned. It was dizzyingly painful and stinging. Am I trapped in this blazing heat?
“She’s still alive. I think we need to lift her out.”
"Understood, Princess. I'll find something that can serve as leverage."
Johanna wedged a good piece of wood lying nearby under the pillar. Two people grabbed it and tried to lift it with all their might, but it wouldn't budge.
“Barbara, just hold on a second. I’ll get it out for you.”
I tried several times, but nothing worked. I tried to call for help, but there was no one around to help. Barbara, Milia, and Ted were likely down there, too. I gritted my teeth, unable to contain my helplessness and frustration.
“Why doesn’t it work?”
How can I endure this harsh reality, where miracles are unthinkable? Why does it show me a reality even more horrifying than the one I know?
A cold drop of water fell and flowed down my flushed cheek. The sky, indifferent, was pouring black rain. The flames grew fiercer and spread wider. The rain should have extinguished the fire, but it was spreading even wider. Whoever created this must be the devil. I wish that devil would burn to death in the eternal flames of karma. My head was spinning, and my breathing was suffocating. The pressure that was squeezing my lungs made my mind dizzy.
“Princess, we must escape before it rains more!”
I tried to hold Barbara's hand again, but I didn't feel the same faint movement as before. It felt utterly empty, like an empty shell, containing nothing.
“It can’t be done, it can’t be done. It can’t be done.”
When I came to, I was roughly digging the ground. Blood flowed from my broken fingernails, scraping the floor.
“We have to go quickly!”
Johanna, her nose pinched and coughing, grabbed my arm and forcibly pulled me up. I kept looking back, still held by her. The remaining supports, barely holding the building together, crumbled away. A blazing flame, so fierce it seemed like it would melt my corneas just by looking at it, raged. I muttered in despair, watching the raging inferno, threatening to engulf everything around me.
“We have to go together...”
There are people out there who were kind to me. I failed to save them. After all my will and thoughts to save them became meaningless, I became like an idiot, completely lost.
I felt no emotion. When I returned to the ruined Tempshire Palace after encountering the soldiers who had been searching for me, the pale Queen embraced me and took a long, deep breath. I still didn't cry.
***
Loganfield, the beautiful and sophisticated capital of Medea, was reduced to ruins, with few buildings remaining intact. Many people died, lost their families, and lost their homes. The survivors' primary task was to dig through the rubble to find the bodies. They prayed they were gone, but at least hoped to find traces of their loved ones so they could hold funerals.
The Tempshire Palace wasn't spared from the bombing either. The historic royal palace was destroyed, and the garden where Noah and I were married was charred to ash. The Queen and I moved to Blair Palace in Colin City, which was undamaged. Johanna and I received treatment for burns, respiratory therapy, and eardrum damage. Every breath I take, perhaps from the smoke and toxic fumes, feels like a prickling sensation in my lungs.
Fortunately, the others had fled to the bunker beneath the palace as soon as they heard the air raid warning, so they were safe. Henry said he had a hard time carrying Boaz as he tried to find me. Daniel said he was in a lot of pain from the shock of that day. I haven't slept properly since then. Strangely, I wasn't hungry. I wasn't sad, nor was I angry.
Was this the result of cornering Frogen and the war corporations? Or was it the retaliation of the capitalists who suffered losses? Was it a warning from the world to me, who was complacent and ignorant of a similar history? Whatever the reason, it feels like it's my fault.
I threw down the newspaper with the meaningless article about Ted and Milia, who died while rescuing people, receiving a promotion and a medal for their distinguished service, and fell into bed.
“Are you bored?”
I heard Ted's playful voice and hastily sat up. Barbara, Milia, and Ted were standing at the head of the bed, looking at me with their usual expressions. I shook my head in relief.
"No. We're all together, so how could we be bored? I just had a bad dream."
Milia looked worried.
“Princess, but alcohol and sleeping pills are not allowed.”
“Yes, Milia.”
I readily answered. Only then did she smile. Soon, Barbara's spirited voice was heard.
"I can't tell you how happy I am to be your friend, Princess. Stay healthy and well."
I asked them, who smiled affectionately, feeling strange.
“Where are you going?”
I opened my eyes with a start, feeling my entire body sink under the bed. I quickly tried to grasp reality. Boaz, who was curled up next to me, licked my cheek with a worried look. I hugged the back of his neck.
“Boaz, I couldn’t save them.”
I was back in a harsh reality that I wished was just a dream. My dear ones had died. A crushing sense of helplessness gripped me, and I realized it was too late. They were my friends, my precious people. They had been kind and gentle to my wary self. Whatever the reason, it didn't matter. Barbara had protected me, even when I was the target of criticism, and had even taken the time to vent her anger. Milia had worried about me, never taking vacation days, and always staying by my side. Ted had sacrificed his own sleep to spend time with me when I couldn't sleep. They always prioritized my heart and emotions, so they understood my sadness even when I smiled innocently.
It wasn't a favor I could take for granted simply because I was a Princess. I had once again made the mistake of losing something only to realize its value. Will all the kind and caring people leave, leaving only the devil behind?
“This world is hell.”
I felt like the world was turned upside down. I looked up at the high ceiling painting and locked eyes with the angel in it. I let out a silent scream.
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