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The very next morning, Heiner came to Annette's room accompanied by his newly hired attending doctor. The doctor, who appeared to be in his mid-to-late forties, had a very friendly smile.
"Hello, ma'am. My name is Mila Lauren. I graduated from Verden University School of Medicine and worked as a specialist at Launceston Cross Hospital for 12 years. I promise to do my best."
“Oh, yes. I’m Annette...”
It felt strange to have Heiner's last name added to her own. Annette hesitated for a moment before adding,
“... Valdemar. Please take good care of me.”
In that fleeting moment, Heiner's strange gaze briefly touched hers, then fell away. Annette averted her eyes.
Mila Lauren, oblivious to this, simply smiled kindly and continued speaking.
"I've been informed of your previous situation. We will be especially careful to prevent drug abuse and overdose. By the way, Madam, I heard you received separate psychological counseling while hospitalized..."
“Yes, just a few times.”
“I don’t know much about that, so wouldn’t it be better to call a counselor?”
“If you wish, I can call the same counselor as at Luther Hospital.”
Suddenly, Heiner interrupted. Annette furrowed her brow in discomfort.
She didn't want to be treated as having a mental illness, even if it was just simple counseling.
Socially, seeking psychological counseling was never viewed favorably. While awareness of the issue has improved, it persists among the insular aristocracy.
A mental health condition could hinder marriage for the individual or their family. This was a significant issue, as most nobles engaged in politically motivated marriages.
Annette was an unusual case of love-marriage, but she embodied the mindset of the privileged class. Even now, with the decline of the aristocracy, this deeply ingrained mindset remains undeniable.
“I don’t need any advice.”
“Oh, ma’am, there’s no need to be nervous at all.”
Mila Lauren, who had previously served as the personal doctor to a noble family, noticed Annette's reluctance.
“Simple psychological counseling is almost mandatory in schools these days.”
“No, I really don’t need it.”
In fact, it was ridiculous to even bother with reputation at this point. Adding a rumor of mental illness to her already shaky reputation wouldn't change anything.
But Annette still hated it. She hated seeing people pretending to worry about the miscarriage, and she hated the idea of it being mentioned in the first place.
She wanted to live as if nothing had happened. As if she had never had children in the first place.
And above all...
“If you continue to defy me like this, I may have you locked up in a mental hospital for the rest of your life.”
Annette has been having doubts lately.
Maybe she's really crazy.
At some point, Annette began to feel as if her mind was floating, as if she were standing on the borderline between reality and dreams.
The feeling became worse when she was under pressure or stress.
She feared that if she received counseling, her condition would be exposed. Fearing that, Annette wasn't particularly cooperative with the counseling at Luther Hospital, and even lied about her answers.
"First of all, I understand what you mean, ma'am. But please take your time and think about it. I'll leave a consultation questionnaire here, so please fill it out when you have time."
Mila Lauren placed a few pieces of paper on the table, but Annette didn't even look at them.
As Heiner watched, Mila Lauren briefly checked her condition. Since she had already been examined at Luther Hospital, it was more of a formal examination.
"Well then, ma'am, if anything feels uncomfortable, please call me anytime. As I said, you must take only the prescribed amount of medication."
"Yes."
Mila Lauren left the room with a faint smile. Annette stared blankly at the back of her graying hair.
He was a gentle woman. With a degree from a prestigious university and twelve years of experience as a specialist, her skills were undoubtedly impressive. She was a doctor who felt it would be a waste to treat someone as mere as herself.
“Annette.”
Annette lifted her eyelids at the quiet call.
“Why are you refusing counseling?”
It was an expected question. An obvious one. In the past, she might have welcomed a sliver of his attention, but now it was all just a nuisance.
“I told you, it’s not necessary.”
"I understand the aristocrats' perception of psychological counseling, but how long are you going to be trapped by that tedious notion? It's not like I'm suggesting you seek counseling because you have a problem right now. Even if you do have a problem."
There was a pause. Heiner's face flickered faintly.
“...Even if there is a problem, you are just sick.”
“...”
“Like a cold, a headache, or something like that. You're just a little sick.”
"Well."
It just sounded funny to her.
“That doesn’t sound like something someone would say if they were going to lock me up in a mental hospital.”
Heiner's eyebrows twitched. He licked his lips and sighed.
“I didn’t know you... kept those words in mind.”
“Didn’t you say to keep it?”
“I only said that because you kept rebelling.”
"...Rebellion?"
Annette cut him off and asked him back. She couldn't help but chuckle.
“Did asking for a divorce seem like rebellion?”
“What I meant was that I didn’t mean it.”
“I'm not your subordinate.”
"Hello, ma'am. My name is Mila Lauren. I graduated from Verden University School of Medicine and worked as a specialist at Launceston Cross Hospital for 12 years. I promise to do my best."
“Oh, yes. I’m Annette...”
It felt strange to have Heiner's last name added to her own. Annette hesitated for a moment before adding,
“... Valdemar. Please take good care of me.”
In that fleeting moment, Heiner's strange gaze briefly touched hers, then fell away. Annette averted her eyes.
Mila Lauren, oblivious to this, simply smiled kindly and continued speaking.
"I've been informed of your previous situation. We will be especially careful to prevent drug abuse and overdose. By the way, Madam, I heard you received separate psychological counseling while hospitalized..."
“Yes, just a few times.”
“I don’t know much about that, so wouldn’t it be better to call a counselor?”
“If you wish, I can call the same counselor as at Luther Hospital.”
Suddenly, Heiner interrupted. Annette furrowed her brow in discomfort.
She didn't want to be treated as having a mental illness, even if it was just simple counseling.
Socially, seeking psychological counseling was never viewed favorably. While awareness of the issue has improved, it persists among the insular aristocracy.
A mental health condition could hinder marriage for the individual or their family. This was a significant issue, as most nobles engaged in politically motivated marriages.
Annette was an unusual case of love-marriage, but she embodied the mindset of the privileged class. Even now, with the decline of the aristocracy, this deeply ingrained mindset remains undeniable.
“I don’t need any advice.”
“Oh, ma’am, there’s no need to be nervous at all.”
Mila Lauren, who had previously served as the personal doctor to a noble family, noticed Annette's reluctance.
“Simple psychological counseling is almost mandatory in schools these days.”
“No, I really don’t need it.”
In fact, it was ridiculous to even bother with reputation at this point. Adding a rumor of mental illness to her already shaky reputation wouldn't change anything.
But Annette still hated it. She hated seeing people pretending to worry about the miscarriage, and she hated the idea of it being mentioned in the first place.
She wanted to live as if nothing had happened. As if she had never had children in the first place.
And above all...
“If you continue to defy me like this, I may have you locked up in a mental hospital for the rest of your life.”
Annette has been having doubts lately.
Maybe she's really crazy.
At some point, Annette began to feel as if her mind was floating, as if she were standing on the borderline between reality and dreams.
The feeling became worse when she was under pressure or stress.
She feared that if she received counseling, her condition would be exposed. Fearing that, Annette wasn't particularly cooperative with the counseling at Luther Hospital, and even lied about her answers.
"First of all, I understand what you mean, ma'am. But please take your time and think about it. I'll leave a consultation questionnaire here, so please fill it out when you have time."
Mila Lauren placed a few pieces of paper on the table, but Annette didn't even look at them.
As Heiner watched, Mila Lauren briefly checked her condition. Since she had already been examined at Luther Hospital, it was more of a formal examination.
"Well then, ma'am, if anything feels uncomfortable, please call me anytime. As I said, you must take only the prescribed amount of medication."
"Yes."
Mila Lauren left the room with a faint smile. Annette stared blankly at the back of her graying hair.
He was a gentle woman. With a degree from a prestigious university and twelve years of experience as a specialist, her skills were undoubtedly impressive. She was a doctor who felt it would be a waste to treat someone as mere as herself.
“Annette.”
Annette lifted her eyelids at the quiet call.
“Why are you refusing counseling?”
It was an expected question. An obvious one. In the past, she might have welcomed a sliver of his attention, but now it was all just a nuisance.
“I told you, it’s not necessary.”
"I understand the aristocrats' perception of psychological counseling, but how long are you going to be trapped by that tedious notion? It's not like I'm suggesting you seek counseling because you have a problem right now. Even if you do have a problem."
There was a pause. Heiner's face flickered faintly.
“...Even if there is a problem, you are just sick.”
“...”
“Like a cold, a headache, or something like that. You're just a little sick.”
Annette, unaware of it, smiled wryly.
It just sounded funny to her.
“That doesn’t sound like something someone would say if they were going to lock me up in a mental hospital.”
Heiner's eyebrows twitched. He licked his lips and sighed.
“I didn’t know you... kept those words in mind.”
“Didn’t you say to keep it?”
“I only said that because you kept rebelling.”
"...Rebellion?"
Annette cut him off and asked him back. She couldn't help but chuckle.
“Did asking for a divorce seem like rebellion?”
“What I meant was that I didn’t mean it.”
“I'm not your subordinate.”
“I have never treated you as an inferior.”
"Lie."
“You are the one who thinks of me like that.”
“...What are you talking about all of a sudden?”
Heiner immediately fell silent. An unnatural silence hung between them. Annette asked again.
“When did I ever think of you as inferior?”
“I always thought... that way.”
“I’ve never done that.”
“You did.”
“I never did that. What on earth are you talking about?”
Heiner stroked his lips with a tired expression. A large hand brushed it, and his face instantly returned to its usual impassive expression. It was a surprisingly rapid transformation.
“Let’s stop here. I didn’t mean to fight you.”
There had been countless conversations like this, cut off like this. But Annette didn't refute or add anything.
Dialogue is something we only attempt with those with whom we have a chance of restoring a relationship. In that sense, Heiner wasn't someone worthy of constructive dialogue.
Annette also wasn't thinking much about the future.
“...Please write this down and give it to the doctor.”
Heiner rested his finger on the counseling questionnaire for a moment before lifting it. Annette didn't look at it until the very end.
***
The midday sun streamed through the half-curtained window. Annette sat by the window, slowly tapping the window frame with her fingertips. A slow, rhythmic sound echoed dully.
Inside the residence, Annette was waiting for Katrine Groth.
Katrine didn't visit the residence the next day or the day after that. It had already been nearly a week. But Annette waited for her.
Time continued to pass. She didn't contact her again, and no one came calling, but Annette waited for her.
Annette didn't know how long she would have to wait. But the feeling of waiting for someone was not bad, so she figured it would be okay if she arrived very late.
"Ah..."
Annette, who was looking out the window, unconsciously let out a sigh.
On the first floor, Annelie Engels was walking briskly, carrying a heavy-looking box of documents. She looked very busy.
Annette stared down at her. She didn't have any particular feelings for Annelie Engels. She simply looked at her.
She was curious as to why she was so busy.
Suddenly, Annelie stopped. Annette turned her head in the opposite direction.
Heiner, accompanied by his aide, was walking slowly towards her. His large size made him immediately noticeable from afar.
As expected, Heiner and Annelie greeted each other. They exchanged some words, then Heiner turned and began walking side by side.
Heiner reached out as if to take the box of documents from Annelie. Annelie hesitated, declined, and then reluctantly handed it over.
Annelie laughed out loud at the interesting story. Heiner smiled faintly as well. The birds perched on the fence fluttered in flight.
A calm gaze, without any moisture, stared at the two.
Annette didn't really understand jealousy. She'd never even considered the possibility that Heiner would ever look at another woman.
It's a bit funny to think about it herself, but it was the same even though she ended up in this situation.
“I originally had no intention of accepting it, so I tried to quietly decline, but the article came out... Anyway, I won’t change my mind.”
She didn't believe that was a lie. She didn't think Heiner would lie about something like that, or at least he wouldn't cheat.
Suddenly, a hollow laugh escaped her lips.
'I believe you after being fooled like that.'
Is the Heiner you knew really the Heiner you knew? Of all the things you thought you knew about him, is there anything you can be certain of?
Suddenly, she noticed her empty hand, missing a ring. The ring finger, which had long been adorned with a ring, was slightly tapered at the bottom.
She didn't feel particularly empty.
Annette turned her gaze out the window, feeling a strange sensation. The view behind her became clearer. Time seemed to have stopped, passing slowly.
Heiner raised his head and looked this way.
Annette wasn't particularly surprised, nor did she look away. He was so far away that she couldn't even be sure he was really looking at her.
After a moment, Heiner turned his head again. Time, which had stopped, began to flow quickly again. The tree branches swayed gently.
A faint breeze and Annelie's laughter filtered through the slightly open window. The two walked forward. The road stretched on ahead of them.
Annette quietly closed the window.
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