After a morning tea party with the nobles, I returned to my room, mentally drained from the excessive emotional outburst. Who knew I'd be in this world overflowing with social behavior, speech, and smiles? It's exhausting.
"Princess, you don't have any plans for the rest of the day. Is there anything you'd like to do? Maybe watch a game or go shopping?"
As I was lost in my own daydreams, Milia politely asked me, "I woke up so early, I wanted to sleep more and do nothing. But I had a place to go." I leaned back on the sofa, weakly holding my head as I answered.
“I plan to go to the royal library.”
"As expected of a wise and generous Princess. You spend your free time reading. I'll call my maid to prepare a dress suitable for reading."
Oh, please, no, don't do that.
“...I plan to continue like this.”
"All right."
"I'd like to read without being disturbed, but I'm worried it'll be difficult if so many attendants follow me. After all, this is inside the palace, right?"
"Understood, Princess. We will wait in front of the library."
I headed to the royal library with Millia and two newly arrived maids. Anyone visiting the palace can enter, and because it's so large and houses so many ancient books, scholars and students often apply for access for study or research purposes. Millia spoke with a bright face.
"Princess, I've ordered everyone out of the library and banned them from entering for the day so you can read quietly without interruption."
No, that's not it either. Don't do that.
"Milia, the library is a place for everyone to use. Such abuse of power is problematic."
“...I was short-sighted. I apologize, Princess. I will be more careful in the future.”
Milia, who had been preparing to be praised, apologized, and her face turned gloomy. I scolded her, spitting out words that sounded like a grown-up, but the truth was, it was because my ambitious plan had failed. There was no way I'd come here purely to read books. I had arranged to meet Noah here, pretending it was a coincidence, pretending it was fate, but you made it so I could use it alone.
"You're right."
“You two seem like a good match. Have you ever tried to court him first?”
“He's not interested in women. And I... I’m not good at that kind of thing...”
Milia's voice, always strong and clear, gradually faltered, becoming almost inaudible at the end of her sentences. Eileen, seeing her face flush as if it were about to burst, burst into laughter.
“Princess, Sir Millia is brave, but she is quite clumsy in this area.”
“I see. Eileen, does Maria have a man in mind?”
“I don’t have any.”
Maria, who answers simply, seems to have a somewhat reserved personality. Eileen, who is always cheerful and bright, brushed back her hair and smiled.
"We broke up two days ago, so I still haven't gotten around to it. But that's okay. That's how relationships are."
“Oh my...”
It's a pity we're in similar situations. Anyway, I felt compelled to connect Millia with this man named Ted Dominic, so I raised my glass to Millia as if to bless her.
“Milia, I will help you.”
"Yes?"
"I want to help you get to Sir Ted as your prom partner. It's hard to just watch, isn't it? I'll give you the day off."
“Princess.. I am deeply humbled by your consideration and care for even the feelings of those below me.”
“Of course I should. You're my person.”
Milia's turquoise eyes sparkled, perhaps touched by the words "my person." I gazed into them, struck by their clarity and beauty. They were the eyes of the upright and honest people I'd always known. They always left me early. Thinking of those who vanished into the past filled me with a bittersweet feeling.
"Princess, you don't have any plans for the rest of the day. Is there anything you'd like to do? Maybe watch a game or go shopping?"
As I was lost in my own daydreams, Milia politely asked me, "I woke up so early, I wanted to sleep more and do nothing. But I had a place to go." I leaned back on the sofa, weakly holding my head as I answered.
“I plan to go to the royal library.”
"As expected of a wise and generous Princess. You spend your free time reading. I'll call my maid to prepare a dress suitable for reading."
Oh, please, no, don't do that.
“...I plan to continue like this.”
"All right."
"I'd like to read without being disturbed, but I'm worried it'll be difficult if so many attendants follow me. After all, this is inside the palace, right?"
"Understood, Princess. We will wait in front of the library."
I headed to the royal library with Millia and two newly arrived maids. Anyone visiting the palace can enter, and because it's so large and houses so many ancient books, scholars and students often apply for access for study or research purposes. Millia spoke with a bright face.
"Princess, I've ordered everyone out of the library and banned them from entering for the day so you can read quietly without interruption."
No, that's not it either. Don't do that.
"Milia, the library is a place for everyone to use. Such abuse of power is problematic."
“...I was short-sighted. I apologize, Princess. I will be more careful in the future.”
Milia, who had been preparing to be praised, apologized, and her face turned gloomy. I scolded her, spitting out words that sounded like a grown-up, but the truth was, it was because my ambitious plan had failed. There was no way I'd come here purely to read books. I had arranged to meet Noah here, pretending it was a coincidence, pretending it was fate, but you made it so I could use it alone.
I feel ruined. Noah and I aren't divorced yet, and we're still married, but we can't meet freely without a plausible reason. Everyone probably knows I'm preparing for a divorce and living apart. I can't do anything that would blatantly damage my right to the throne. Doing so could be detrimental to Noah.
"It's okay. I'll go and gather some food for my heart, Milia."
I smiled compassionately and entered the empty, silent library. Surely no one would be there anyway, so I threw my weary body down on the sofa inside. Outside the large window, I could see the green leaves of a large tree swaying. Warm sunlight filtered gently through the leaves, casting a gentle shadow over me as I lay there.
“It’s a shame. I missed you.”
It's not like we're secretly dating, what a shame. I haven't seen him in a week. Finding a reason to meet him is no easy feat.
As I lay there staring at the ceiling, my eyes closed involuntarily. I must have dozed off for a moment. A distinct scent, different from the oak and paper scents that enveloped the quiet library, startled me open. What I saw was someone's large hand. Rolling my eyes, I looked up and saw silver-white hair, backlit by the sunlight, twinkling like a halo. Noah, who had made me a lap pillow, was staring down at me, shielding my face from the sunlight.
“Noah. When did you get here?”
“It hasn’t been that long.”
“They said they wouldn’t let anyone in, how could you...?”
“Because infiltration is my specialty.”
The self-proclaimed undercover expert's eyes grew longer and more graceful, arching at the corners. The shadows made his dimples appear even deeper. Thinking it was a dream, I raised a hand to gently caress his face. He lowered his eyes and nuzzled my cheek like a cat. It was just the two of us in this vast space, as if we'd been granted a royal visit. I almost felt bad for reprimanding Milia.
"Diana. How have you been? It's been a week."
“Yes, I’ve been well...”
It wasn't the typical exchange between a married couple, but I decided to put aside any unnecessary thoughts. His smile, gazing down at me, was dazzlingly beautiful. Something I'd been so consumed by felt a surge of replenishment. I sat up and studied him. The upturned corners of his mouth, his high nose, his long, slanted eyes, his sharp jawline. Everything I loved was still there, and I felt a sense of relief that it was still there. He was dressed formally—a navy suit vest with fine stripes, a shirt, and a tie—but he looked strangely sexy. Perhaps it was because his waistline was a work of art? I added awkwardly, glancing at his broad shoulders and muscular chest.
“That... shall we hug for a moment?”
"Is it so?"
His scent drifted closer. Embraced by the warmth I hadn't felt in ages, all my worries seemed to melt away. I buried my face in his neck and took a deep breath. I think I sniffed without even realizing it. His shoulders trembled, and I felt his arms tighten around my waist. I held onto his back tightly. I wanted to stay like this all day. This man is the only joy in my life.
“Diana.”
Instead of gently pulling away, he brought his face closer to mine. Beneath his lowered lashes, his eyes, like the cloudy sky, were filled with longing. His voice, languidly wet, and his breath drifted into my ear.
“You didn’t come here to read books, did you?”
I briefly locked eyes with his mysterious blue, then closed them as if to consent. Soon, our soft lips met. Unlike his usual relaxed and easygoing pace, his breathing became increasingly rapid, a sense of urgency. He gripped my shoulders with a firm hand and pushed me down onto the sofa, acting as if he were thirsty. I frowned and roughly pulled at his stuffy tie, loosening it. I looked up at him with a flushed face and asked.
“Did you miss me?”
“Yeah. Enough to make me think about sneaking into your room.”
“Is that possible?”
“If you want.”
Noah's eyes were reddened. The countless words he wanted to say were swallowed deep inside. His strong arms, as if trying to fill the void he had left, embraced me tightly. No matter how much I quenched my thirst and swallowed everything in the brief moment allowed, the thirst incessantly arose. Noah slowly parted his lips, his face a sorrowful expression.
"Why won't you meet me? Is Princess's life more fun than hanging out with me?"
“No, I told you there was a reason.”
“I didn’t specifically tell you not to meet.”
"At least that's how it should look. I don't want to give them excuses like, 'I gave them enough time to sort things out.'"
“I hate it.”
Noah shook his head weakly. Is he throwing a tantrum? He's cute.
"Anyway..."
Noah paused as he began to say something. His clouded blue eyes glared fiercely, and he turned his head away.
“Why is that?”
He stared at the entrance. Soon, he heard Milia's voice from the library entrance.
“Princess, are you still reading?”
Noah and I simultaneously looked at each other, then back toward the entrance. If I were caught in such a blatant pose, my image as upright and exemplary would be shattered. After that, they'd be suspicious wherever I go, and surveillance would be tighter.
“Princess? I’ll go in.”
In my haste, I grabbed Noah's tie and stood up. I looked down at the tie, which had been pulled roughly, with slightly displeased eyes, as if he had been strangled unexpectedly.
“Honey, I think you treat me too roughly sometimes.”
“Shh, I’m sorry. Hide now.”
"Yes."
As I straightened my clothes and smoothed my disheveled attire, the sound of Milia's neat footsteps drew near. I picked up a random book and sat down on the sofa, pretending my precious reading time had been interrupted, my concentration interrupted, and I made a serious face.
“What’s going on?”
"I'm very sorry to disturb you. It's time for dinner. Her Majesty the Queen sent word that the Princess must never miss a meal."
"It's already lunchtime. I was so focused that I lost track of time. I think a simple sandwich would be fine."
“You are not allowed to eat in the library.”
“Why?”
“I’m sorry, but that’s not possible.”
"Why can't I do that, given the power to use the library as if I were renting it?" Millia's firm words made me nod with a helpless expression.
“I have a question for you, Princess. Is there a special reason why you read books like that?”
Milia's eyes sparkled with curiosity. Only then did I realize I was holding the book upside down, but I remained unfazed and answered solemnly.
"I try to read every single word without missing a single word. This way, I can accurately grasp the author's intentions."
“Ah, such a profound meaning.”
I sat up, looking at Noah, who was hiding behind the bookshelf across from me, with a pensive look.
But do I really have to go this far? I'm too tired. I feel like this won't do. The best thing would be to avoid seeing him altogether, but I'm only human, so that won't work. I might get so impatient that my clothes might burst. I think it's time for me to find someone to turn a blind eye to my secret encounters with him. And that includes helping me escape later.
Entering the room, I sat at the table set with food, my fork in hand, observing Millia, the newly arrived noble maid, Baroness Maria Cates, and the knight maid, Ensign Eileen Russell. They were discussing what I should wear for the upcoming ball and what accessories would look good on me. "It's a ball, and the maids are noble ladies, so they'd probably want to go with a partner," I muttered to myself, then smirked at them.
“Do you all have lovers?”
All three of them shook their heads at the same time at my question. They were such little kids. However, I noticed a slight blush on Milia's cheeks. I didn't miss it and immediately asked.
“Milia, I think you have a crush on someone.”
“Oh, how did you know?”
Embarrassed, Milia covered her mouth with both hands, and her eyes widened. She was a woman of honesty, and it was evident on her face.
"Your cheeks are red. Who is it? I really enjoy this kind of friendly conversation. Feel free to talk to me like a friend."
Speak quickly. I need to build empathy so they'll sympathize with me and help me, living alone, separated from my husband. And I need to figure out who you are. I offered a very humane smile. In reality, it was little more than a command disguised as friendliness, so Milia hesitated, then cautiously confessed.
“I have long admired and respected Lieutenant Colonel Ted Dominic of the Royal Horse Guards.”
"He's the eldest son of the Marquis Dominic family. The son of the Treasurer. He was knighted, wasn't he?"
"It's okay. I'll go and gather some food for my heart, Milia."
I smiled compassionately and entered the empty, silent library. Surely no one would be there anyway, so I threw my weary body down on the sofa inside. Outside the large window, I could see the green leaves of a large tree swaying. Warm sunlight filtered gently through the leaves, casting a gentle shadow over me as I lay there.
“It’s a shame. I missed you.”
It's not like we're secretly dating, what a shame. I haven't seen him in a week. Finding a reason to meet him is no easy feat.
As I lay there staring at the ceiling, my eyes closed involuntarily. I must have dozed off for a moment. A distinct scent, different from the oak and paper scents that enveloped the quiet library, startled me open. What I saw was someone's large hand. Rolling my eyes, I looked up and saw silver-white hair, backlit by the sunlight, twinkling like a halo. Noah, who had made me a lap pillow, was staring down at me, shielding my face from the sunlight.
“Noah. When did you get here?”
“It hasn’t been that long.”
“They said they wouldn’t let anyone in, how could you...?”
“Because infiltration is my specialty.”
The self-proclaimed undercover expert's eyes grew longer and more graceful, arching at the corners. The shadows made his dimples appear even deeper. Thinking it was a dream, I raised a hand to gently caress his face. He lowered his eyes and nuzzled my cheek like a cat. It was just the two of us in this vast space, as if we'd been granted a royal visit. I almost felt bad for reprimanding Milia.
"Diana. How have you been? It's been a week."
“Yes, I’ve been well...”
It wasn't the typical exchange between a married couple, but I decided to put aside any unnecessary thoughts. His smile, gazing down at me, was dazzlingly beautiful. Something I'd been so consumed by felt a surge of replenishment. I sat up and studied him. The upturned corners of his mouth, his high nose, his long, slanted eyes, his sharp jawline. Everything I loved was still there, and I felt a sense of relief that it was still there. He was dressed formally—a navy suit vest with fine stripes, a shirt, and a tie—but he looked strangely sexy. Perhaps it was because his waistline was a work of art? I added awkwardly, glancing at his broad shoulders and muscular chest.
“That... shall we hug for a moment?”
"Is it so?"
His scent drifted closer. Embraced by the warmth I hadn't felt in ages, all my worries seemed to melt away. I buried my face in his neck and took a deep breath. I think I sniffed without even realizing it. His shoulders trembled, and I felt his arms tighten around my waist. I held onto his back tightly. I wanted to stay like this all day. This man is the only joy in my life.
“Diana.”
Instead of gently pulling away, he brought his face closer to mine. Beneath his lowered lashes, his eyes, like the cloudy sky, were filled with longing. His voice, languidly wet, and his breath drifted into my ear.
“You didn’t come here to read books, did you?”
I briefly locked eyes with his mysterious blue, then closed them as if to consent. Soon, our soft lips met. Unlike his usual relaxed and easygoing pace, his breathing became increasingly rapid, a sense of urgency. He gripped my shoulders with a firm hand and pushed me down onto the sofa, acting as if he were thirsty. I frowned and roughly pulled at his stuffy tie, loosening it. I looked up at him with a flushed face and asked.
“Did you miss me?”
“Yeah. Enough to make me think about sneaking into your room.”
“Is that possible?”
“If you want.”
Noah's eyes were reddened. The countless words he wanted to say were swallowed deep inside. His strong arms, as if trying to fill the void he had left, embraced me tightly. No matter how much I quenched my thirst and swallowed everything in the brief moment allowed, the thirst incessantly arose. Noah slowly parted his lips, his face a sorrowful expression.
"Why won't you meet me? Is Princess's life more fun than hanging out with me?"
“No, I told you there was a reason.”
“I didn’t specifically tell you not to meet.”
"At least that's how it should look. I don't want to give them excuses like, 'I gave them enough time to sort things out.'"
“I hate it.”
Noah shook his head weakly. Is he throwing a tantrum? He's cute.
"Anyway..."
Noah paused as he began to say something. His clouded blue eyes glared fiercely, and he turned his head away.
“Why is that?”
He stared at the entrance. Soon, he heard Milia's voice from the library entrance.
“Princess, are you still reading?”
Noah and I simultaneously looked at each other, then back toward the entrance. If I were caught in such a blatant pose, my image as upright and exemplary would be shattered. After that, they'd be suspicious wherever I go, and surveillance would be tighter.
“Princess? I’ll go in.”
In my haste, I grabbed Noah's tie and stood up. I looked down at the tie, which had been pulled roughly, with slightly displeased eyes, as if he had been strangled unexpectedly.
“Honey, I think you treat me too roughly sometimes.”
“Shh, I’m sorry. Hide now.”
"Yes."
As I straightened my clothes and smoothed my disheveled attire, the sound of Milia's neat footsteps drew near. I picked up a random book and sat down on the sofa, pretending my precious reading time had been interrupted, my concentration interrupted, and I made a serious face.
“What’s going on?”
"I'm very sorry to disturb you. It's time for dinner. Her Majesty the Queen sent word that the Princess must never miss a meal."
"It's already lunchtime. I was so focused that I lost track of time. I think a simple sandwich would be fine."
“You are not allowed to eat in the library.”
“Why?”
“I’m sorry, but that’s not possible.”
"Why can't I do that, given the power to use the library as if I were renting it?" Millia's firm words made me nod with a helpless expression.
“I have a question for you, Princess. Is there a special reason why you read books like that?”
Milia's eyes sparkled with curiosity. Only then did I realize I was holding the book upside down, but I remained unfazed and answered solemnly.
"I try to read every single word without missing a single word. This way, I can accurately grasp the author's intentions."
“Ah, such a profound meaning.”
I sat up, looking at Noah, who was hiding behind the bookshelf across from me, with a pensive look.
But do I really have to go this far? I'm too tired. I feel like this won't do. The best thing would be to avoid seeing him altogether, but I'm only human, so that won't work. I might get so impatient that my clothes might burst. I think it's time for me to find someone to turn a blind eye to my secret encounters with him. And that includes helping me escape later.
Entering the room, I sat at the table set with food, my fork in hand, observing Millia, the newly arrived noble maid, Baroness Maria Cates, and the knight maid, Ensign Eileen Russell. They were discussing what I should wear for the upcoming ball and what accessories would look good on me. "It's a ball, and the maids are noble ladies, so they'd probably want to go with a partner," I muttered to myself, then smirked at them.
“Do you all have lovers?”
All three of them shook their heads at the same time at my question. They were such little kids. However, I noticed a slight blush on Milia's cheeks. I didn't miss it and immediately asked.
“Milia, I think you have a crush on someone.”
“Oh, how did you know?”
Embarrassed, Milia covered her mouth with both hands, and her eyes widened. She was a woman of honesty, and it was evident on her face.
"Your cheeks are red. Who is it? I really enjoy this kind of friendly conversation. Feel free to talk to me like a friend."
Speak quickly. I need to build empathy so they'll sympathize with me and help me, living alone, separated from my husband. And I need to figure out who you are. I offered a very humane smile. In reality, it was little more than a command disguised as friendliness, so Milia hesitated, then cautiously confessed.
“I have long admired and respected Lieutenant Colonel Ted Dominic of the Royal Horse Guards.”
"He's the eldest son of the Marquis Dominic family. The son of the Treasurer. He was knighted, wasn't he?"
"You're right."
“You two seem like a good match. Have you ever tried to court him first?”
“He's not interested in women. And I... I’m not good at that kind of thing...”
Milia's voice, always strong and clear, gradually faltered, becoming almost inaudible at the end of her sentences. Eileen, seeing her face flush as if it were about to burst, burst into laughter.
“Princess, Sir Millia is brave, but she is quite clumsy in this area.”
“I see. Eileen, does Maria have a man in mind?”
“I don’t have any.”
Maria, who answers simply, seems to have a somewhat reserved personality. Eileen, who is always cheerful and bright, brushed back her hair and smiled.
"We broke up two days ago, so I still haven't gotten around to it. But that's okay. That's how relationships are."
“Oh my...”
It's a pity we're in similar situations. Anyway, I felt compelled to connect Millia with this man named Ted Dominic, so I raised my glass to Millia as if to bless her.
“Milia, I will help you.”
"Yes?"
"I want to help you get to Sir Ted as your prom partner. It's hard to just watch, isn't it? I'll give you the day off."
“Princess.. I am deeply humbled by your consideration and care for even the feelings of those below me.”
“Of course I should. You're my person.”
Milia's turquoise eyes sparkled, perhaps touched by the words "my person." I gazed into them, struck by their clarity and beauty. They were the eyes of the upright and honest people I'd always known. They always left me early. Thinking of those who vanished into the past filled me with a bittersweet feeling.
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