There were countless things I wanted to do with him, yet they were simple.
Waking up together, spending time together, and going to bed together—a lifelong cycle, until death. A monotonous existence, where the only special events are minor changes like travel or moving, like a trip to the same routine. The limited four-day grace period, while imbuing it with a sense of specialness, also made us lose everything we took for granted.
“There is nothing.”
Within the constraints of my circumstances, there were so many things I wanted to do with him that I couldn't do. So, I had no choice but to answer, "No." His eyelashes slowly lowered as he gazed at me. The corners of his mouth still lifted gracefully.
"You said you wanted to do a lot with me. You said you wanted to go on a pleasure plane, and you even suggested we build a secret base in your garden. You even made a year-long plan. You said we'd go to a seaside villa in the summer, take a trip to Estonia to see the autumn foliage, and go skiing in the Zenith Mountains in the winter."
“It’s all useless now, so it’s gone.”
“We’re not breaking up.”
“I wanted us to be together. Always, always.”
I suddenly felt angry. I felt both resentful and sad. I really liked him. That's why I was angry. Why didn't he run away with me? He said he liked me. I knew it wasn't right, but I stubbornly threw a tantrum. Like a child unable to control her emotions, I lashed out and screamed, refusing to listen to him no matter what. I stood still, trying to calm my tumultuous mind, but eventually, all the truth I'd been suppressing burst out.
“I want to run away.”
“I think so too.”
Noah, for some reason, spoke with sympathy. Perhaps he had truly shared the same sentiment. He sighed deeply and brushed back his bangs, revealing his handsome forehead and eyebrows. Beneath them, narrow blue eyes, the delicate lines at the corners of his eyes rising even further. He added, frowning slightly.
"But the escape route isn't well-equipped with bunkers. You might end up making pizza in a brick oven."
How dare he say something like that in such a serious situation? I couldn't help but chuckle at the thought of his serious tone and completely unserious words.
“No, can you please speak to suit the mood?”
“It’s been so long since I deserted that that’s the only good example that comes to mind.”
Looking at him differently, he looked like a sullen cat, his eyes narrowed and his ears folded back. Apparently, he'd learned that direct words offend me. He no longer spoke only negative and realistic words like before. I held his hand with both of my own, a lingering smile on my face.
"You never know, maybe someone else could be crowned King. I have flaws, after all."
“Yeah, it’s possible.”
"So, don't think of it as the time we have left. Why not just think of it as a date? I think it'll be fun."
“Then date me. For four days straight.”
"Great."
I stood next to him, arms crossed, smiling and looking up at him. I didn't want to spend time with him depressed about something that hadn't happened yet. This moment was precious. Noah narrowed his eyes, feigning force.
“I knew you wouldn’t send me home.”
“Then where do we sleep?”
“I’ll think about it when I get home.”
It wasn't until we got home that we realized he meant a "four-day trip." As usual, we washed, changed into our pajamas, and lay down in bed. We talked about our plans for tomorrow: where we'd go and what we'd do.
"It's safe in Korea, so it's okay to go a little further. Should we go to the port city of Jayton? I have a villa there. Honey, you like seeing the ocean."
“Yes. I want to go see the ocean with you.”
Jayton flourished centuries ago as a gateway city for the exploration of the New World. I knew it had a relatively recently opened art museum and the world's largest cathedral, but that didn't really matter. All I cared about was spending time alone with Noah, undisturbed, somewhere else. After a lively conversation, I fell asleep, anticipating a tomorrow that would remain unchanged.
The ordinary routine of standing on a thin glass floor and anxiously carrying on has long since been shattered. Yet, for us, who cling to each other's hands, a profound change has come. Our lives are no longer ordinary.
In conclusion, we couldn't set off on our journey. It was because unfamiliar courtiers and guards, not Baroness Mason, showed up at the mansion early in the morning. Perhaps it was also because I overslept. It wasn't that unexpected, but it left a gloomy impression.
“It is an imperial order to enter the palace quickly.”
“Oh, yes.”
Still half-asleep, I replied irritably and climbed into the royal car with Noah. Boaz must have sensed something unusual, as he came up to the front of the car and barked and howled. Perhaps he knew, with his animal instincts, that I wouldn't be returning. Still dazed, I asked.
“Can I take him? My dog has separation anxiety.”
“I don’t think I can do it because we have to go to an important place first.”
"Yes."
When I finally faced the situation I'd been so terrified of, I wasn't confused, but rather indifferent. It didn't feel real right away, and it felt more like a helpless resignation, like it was going to happen anyway. Perhaps I'd already prepared myself mentally. Nevertheless, my hand desperately clung to Noah's. Noah spoke reassuringly.
“I will take good care of Boaz.”
“Yes, but I don’t want to go.”
I hummed with a blank expression, devoid of any trace of desperation or sadness. Noah grinned, running his other hand through my hair.
“You said you wanted to be ordinary.”
"Yes."
“Then there is no other way, Diana.”
"I know."
It was just a pointless complaint, he whispered softly.
“I told you. Since you chose me, nothing will change.”
"I remember. Even if circumstances change, our relationship remains the same. I'll just think of it as a weekend couple. The mere fact that we're in the same city is comforting, and we know each other's thoughts without having to say a word. I guess that's what they call a bond."
“Yeah. I see. You always think about it.”
The sound of Boaz's pitiful barking faded away.
I turned my head and looked at Boaz, who had been caught by Molly as he ran after the car. Our mansion, the familiar scenery, was fading away. It had once been my home, the one I would return to. Entering our new home for the first time, holding Noah's hand. Me swinging with Daniel. Dr. Rugen is walking in the garden with a cane. Molly, who always greeted me with an upright posture. Noah, walking with me. Even the memories of that place were fading away.
Arriving at Tempshire Palace, I was immediately guided to the Queen's Throne Room. The Queen sat on a magnificent throne, flanked by knights-in-waiting, including Baroness Mason. Prime Minister Stanley and his ministers were also present. Count Harrison, nervous, was seen repeatedly wiping sweat with a handkerchief. The stern-looking chamberlain spoke.
"Countess Diana Ross I'll is the sole direct descendant of Her Majesty Queen Grace II and first in line to the throne of the United Kingdom of Medea. This fact was discovered during a search and investigation of the deceased Admiral Claire's mansion with the assistance of Belford."
"Yes."
My monotonous answer and indifferent expression cast a chilling silence over the spacious audience room. They seemed shaken by my unexpected response.
“From now on, as a direct descendant of Her Majesty Queen Grace Spencer Mary, you will inherit the Spencer surname and Her Majesty’s name. You will be Princess Diana Spencer Grace.”
How many times have I changed my last name since I came here? I stared at the Queen with cold eyes, without answering. I held Noah's hand, feeling as if I was about to be swept away. The Queen, who had been observing my expression, smiled elegantly.
"She seems surprised by the sudden turn of events. As a mother who has been separated from her daughter, I need to have a heart-to-heart talk with her, so please leave for a moment. Sir Noah is no exception."
At the Queen's words, the ministers, knights, and maids left, and Noah smiled at me before leaving. She and I were left alone in the audience chamber. The Queen, leaning back against the back of her chair, let out a long sigh. Her face slightly sunken, she spoke.
“So this is how it ended up.”
“I’m sorry.”
Despite my rant, she didn't react angrily. She simply rested her chin on her hand and stared at me with a strangely curious look in her eyes.
“That boldness reminds me of my younger self.”
A fat tabby cat waddled over and plopped down on the Queen's lap. It seemed familiar in the palace gardens. She slowly rubbed the cat's chin and lowered her eyes.
"Diana. I know you have a lot to be upset about."
"No."
"You're a clever child. So you'll likely accept the Princess's position without hesitation. I suppose you're worried about your husband, Count Noah Rotsilt."
"You're right."
"There's a clause in the eligibility criteria for the throne that says 'not married to a foreigner.' Being an illegitimate child effectively disqualifies you, but fortunately, your father, Admiral Claire, died without revealing this fact."
"Yes. And I already know that eligibility depends on marital status, not marital history."
"Yes, my smart daughter. If you divorce, you'll no longer be married. That's what happens when the first heir dies or is disqualified."
Feeling helpless, with the annulment or divorce now certain, I bit my lower lip. She continued.
"Noah and I made a deal. In exchange for cooperating with Medea, I promised to guarantee you a life together. A Queen never breaks a promise once she's made."
“How do you plan to keep that promise?”
"Well, things have changed quite a bit since Erita was unexpectedly dethroned. I haven't decided exactly what form our relationship will take. It could take several forms. You could take another nobleman as your husband, produce a legitimate heir, and then leave together. Or you could have an extramarital affair with him and keep him by your side as a knight. Of course, it would be a form of government."
The Queen's gaze suddenly turned cold at my question, which contained a firm intention of rejection. The tabby cat sitting on her lap meowed, rubbing its cheek against her snow-white hand.
"This child's name is Maryfin. She's fat, but she's very good at catching mice, and she's very charming, so she's my favorite."
"Yes."
"The reason I didn't deal with you earlier was because of your potential, your utility to Noah Rotsilt. To refuse that would mean you'd be less useful than this cat."
"Worse than a cat?" Her blunt words left a bitter taste in her mouth. The Queen chuckled and continued.
"I'll eliminate you, you've become useless, and replace you with another suitable member of a high-ranking noble family, the true Princess. Since the true Princess's whereabouts are unknown, that's the way it is. Those who are useless are weeded out, and those who cause nothing but harm are disposed of. Just like Erita."
“Was it just that you needed someone to fill the position of heir to the throne?”
My vision blurred like dizziness, then gradually cleared. There was no way she could suddenly feel maternal love for me. Even Erita, whom she raised since infancy, whom shr tried so hard to secure as a Princess, was finally being disposed of in tears.
"It's quite exhausting to be without a successor at such a crucial time. In any case, I commend your wisdom for not fleeing this place. You would have been captured and killed anyway. With the Allied and Alliance forces targeting you everywhere, it wouldn't have been easy."
This was the reason Noah didn't run away with me, the reason he insisted over and over again that I should become the true Princess after my identity was discovered and Erita was dethroned. I was of no use except as heir, and if I refused, I would be a stumbling block who would surely be killed. Amidst the chills, a gentle and kind voice spoke.
"So, how about we become a good mother and daughter? Even acting would be fine. In the royal family, appearances are important. I intend to cherish and respect you as much as possible."
I remembered what Noah had said before.
“I have to live.”
For me, that was the only way to survive.
Waking up together, spending time together, and going to bed together—a lifelong cycle, until death. A monotonous existence, where the only special events are minor changes like travel or moving, like a trip to the same routine. The limited four-day grace period, while imbuing it with a sense of specialness, also made us lose everything we took for granted.
“There is nothing.”
Within the constraints of my circumstances, there were so many things I wanted to do with him that I couldn't do. So, I had no choice but to answer, "No." His eyelashes slowly lowered as he gazed at me. The corners of his mouth still lifted gracefully.
"You said you wanted to do a lot with me. You said you wanted to go on a pleasure plane, and you even suggested we build a secret base in your garden. You even made a year-long plan. You said we'd go to a seaside villa in the summer, take a trip to Estonia to see the autumn foliage, and go skiing in the Zenith Mountains in the winter."
“It’s all useless now, so it’s gone.”
“We’re not breaking up.”
“I wanted us to be together. Always, always.”
I suddenly felt angry. I felt both resentful and sad. I really liked him. That's why I was angry. Why didn't he run away with me? He said he liked me. I knew it wasn't right, but I stubbornly threw a tantrum. Like a child unable to control her emotions, I lashed out and screamed, refusing to listen to him no matter what. I stood still, trying to calm my tumultuous mind, but eventually, all the truth I'd been suppressing burst out.
“I want to run away.”
“I think so too.”
Noah, for some reason, spoke with sympathy. Perhaps he had truly shared the same sentiment. He sighed deeply and brushed back his bangs, revealing his handsome forehead and eyebrows. Beneath them, narrow blue eyes, the delicate lines at the corners of his eyes rising even further. He added, frowning slightly.
"But the escape route isn't well-equipped with bunkers. You might end up making pizza in a brick oven."
How dare he say something like that in such a serious situation? I couldn't help but chuckle at the thought of his serious tone and completely unserious words.
“No, can you please speak to suit the mood?”
“It’s been so long since I deserted that that’s the only good example that comes to mind.”
Looking at him differently, he looked like a sullen cat, his eyes narrowed and his ears folded back. Apparently, he'd learned that direct words offend me. He no longer spoke only negative and realistic words like before. I held his hand with both of my own, a lingering smile on my face.
"You never know, maybe someone else could be crowned King. I have flaws, after all."
“Yeah, it’s possible.”
"So, don't think of it as the time we have left. Why not just think of it as a date? I think it'll be fun."
“Then date me. For four days straight.”
"Great."
I stood next to him, arms crossed, smiling and looking up at him. I didn't want to spend time with him depressed about something that hadn't happened yet. This moment was precious. Noah narrowed his eyes, feigning force.
“I knew you wouldn’t send me home.”
“Then where do we sleep?”
“I’ll think about it when I get home.”
It wasn't until we got home that we realized he meant a "four-day trip." As usual, we washed, changed into our pajamas, and lay down in bed. We talked about our plans for tomorrow: where we'd go and what we'd do.
"It's safe in Korea, so it's okay to go a little further. Should we go to the port city of Jayton? I have a villa there. Honey, you like seeing the ocean."
“Yes. I want to go see the ocean with you.”
Jayton flourished centuries ago as a gateway city for the exploration of the New World. I knew it had a relatively recently opened art museum and the world's largest cathedral, but that didn't really matter. All I cared about was spending time alone with Noah, undisturbed, somewhere else. After a lively conversation, I fell asleep, anticipating a tomorrow that would remain unchanged.
***
The ordinary routine of standing on a thin glass floor and anxiously carrying on has long since been shattered. Yet, for us, who cling to each other's hands, a profound change has come. Our lives are no longer ordinary.
In conclusion, we couldn't set off on our journey. It was because unfamiliar courtiers and guards, not Baroness Mason, showed up at the mansion early in the morning. Perhaps it was also because I overslept. It wasn't that unexpected, but it left a gloomy impression.
“It is an imperial order to enter the palace quickly.”
“Oh, yes.”
Still half-asleep, I replied irritably and climbed into the royal car with Noah. Boaz must have sensed something unusual, as he came up to the front of the car and barked and howled. Perhaps he knew, with his animal instincts, that I wouldn't be returning. Still dazed, I asked.
“Can I take him? My dog has separation anxiety.”
“I don’t think I can do it because we have to go to an important place first.”
"Yes."
When I finally faced the situation I'd been so terrified of, I wasn't confused, but rather indifferent. It didn't feel real right away, and it felt more like a helpless resignation, like it was going to happen anyway. Perhaps I'd already prepared myself mentally. Nevertheless, my hand desperately clung to Noah's. Noah spoke reassuringly.
“I will take good care of Boaz.”
“Yes, but I don’t want to go.”
I hummed with a blank expression, devoid of any trace of desperation or sadness. Noah grinned, running his other hand through my hair.
“You said you wanted to be ordinary.”
"Yes."
“Then there is no other way, Diana.”
"I know."
It was just a pointless complaint, he whispered softly.
“I told you. Since you chose me, nothing will change.”
"I remember. Even if circumstances change, our relationship remains the same. I'll just think of it as a weekend couple. The mere fact that we're in the same city is comforting, and we know each other's thoughts without having to say a word. I guess that's what they call a bond."
“Yeah. I see. You always think about it.”
The sound of Boaz's pitiful barking faded away.
I turned my head and looked at Boaz, who had been caught by Molly as he ran after the car. Our mansion, the familiar scenery, was fading away. It had once been my home, the one I would return to. Entering our new home for the first time, holding Noah's hand. Me swinging with Daniel. Dr. Rugen is walking in the garden with a cane. Molly, who always greeted me with an upright posture. Noah, walking with me. Even the memories of that place were fading away.
Arriving at Tempshire Palace, I was immediately guided to the Queen's Throne Room. The Queen sat on a magnificent throne, flanked by knights-in-waiting, including Baroness Mason. Prime Minister Stanley and his ministers were also present. Count Harrison, nervous, was seen repeatedly wiping sweat with a handkerchief. The stern-looking chamberlain spoke.
"Countess Diana Ross I'll is the sole direct descendant of Her Majesty Queen Grace II and first in line to the throne of the United Kingdom of Medea. This fact was discovered during a search and investigation of the deceased Admiral Claire's mansion with the assistance of Belford."
"Yes."
My monotonous answer and indifferent expression cast a chilling silence over the spacious audience room. They seemed shaken by my unexpected response.
“From now on, as a direct descendant of Her Majesty Queen Grace Spencer Mary, you will inherit the Spencer surname and Her Majesty’s name. You will be Princess Diana Spencer Grace.”
How many times have I changed my last name since I came here? I stared at the Queen with cold eyes, without answering. I held Noah's hand, feeling as if I was about to be swept away. The Queen, who had been observing my expression, smiled elegantly.
"She seems surprised by the sudden turn of events. As a mother who has been separated from her daughter, I need to have a heart-to-heart talk with her, so please leave for a moment. Sir Noah is no exception."
At the Queen's words, the ministers, knights, and maids left, and Noah smiled at me before leaving. She and I were left alone in the audience chamber. The Queen, leaning back against the back of her chair, let out a long sigh. Her face slightly sunken, she spoke.
“So this is how it ended up.”
“I’m sorry.”
Despite my rant, she didn't react angrily. She simply rested her chin on her hand and stared at me with a strangely curious look in her eyes.
“That boldness reminds me of my younger self.”
A fat tabby cat waddled over and plopped down on the Queen's lap. It seemed familiar in the palace gardens. She slowly rubbed the cat's chin and lowered her eyes.
"Diana. I know you have a lot to be upset about."
"No."
"You're a clever child. So you'll likely accept the Princess's position without hesitation. I suppose you're worried about your husband, Count Noah Rotsilt."
"You're right."
"There's a clause in the eligibility criteria for the throne that says 'not married to a foreigner.' Being an illegitimate child effectively disqualifies you, but fortunately, your father, Admiral Claire, died without revealing this fact."
"Yes. And I already know that eligibility depends on marital status, not marital history."
"Yes, my smart daughter. If you divorce, you'll no longer be married. That's what happens when the first heir dies or is disqualified."
Feeling helpless, with the annulment or divorce now certain, I bit my lower lip. She continued.
"Noah and I made a deal. In exchange for cooperating with Medea, I promised to guarantee you a life together. A Queen never breaks a promise once she's made."
“How do you plan to keep that promise?”
"Well, things have changed quite a bit since Erita was unexpectedly dethroned. I haven't decided exactly what form our relationship will take. It could take several forms. You could take another nobleman as your husband, produce a legitimate heir, and then leave together. Or you could have an extramarital affair with him and keep him by your side as a knight. Of course, it would be a form of government."
“What will you do if I don't agree?”
"This child's name is Maryfin. She's fat, but she's very good at catching mice, and she's very charming, so she's my favorite."
"Yes."
"The reason I didn't deal with you earlier was because of your potential, your utility to Noah Rotsilt. To refuse that would mean you'd be less useful than this cat."
"Worse than a cat?" Her blunt words left a bitter taste in her mouth. The Queen chuckled and continued.
"I'll eliminate you, you've become useless, and replace you with another suitable member of a high-ranking noble family, the true Princess. Since the true Princess's whereabouts are unknown, that's the way it is. Those who are useless are weeded out, and those who cause nothing but harm are disposed of. Just like Erita."
“Was it just that you needed someone to fill the position of heir to the throne?”
My vision blurred like dizziness, then gradually cleared. There was no way she could suddenly feel maternal love for me. Even Erita, whom she raised since infancy, whom shr tried so hard to secure as a Princess, was finally being disposed of in tears.
"It's quite exhausting to be without a successor at such a crucial time. In any case, I commend your wisdom for not fleeing this place. You would have been captured and killed anyway. With the Allied and Alliance forces targeting you everywhere, it wouldn't have been easy."
This was the reason Noah didn't run away with me, the reason he insisted over and over again that I should become the true Princess after my identity was discovered and Erita was dethroned. I was of no use except as heir, and if I refused, I would be a stumbling block who would surely be killed. Amidst the chills, a gentle and kind voice spoke.
"So, how about we become a good mother and daughter? Even acting would be fine. In the royal family, appearances are important. I intend to cherish and respect you as much as possible."
I remembered what Noah had said before.
“I have to live.”
For me, that was the only way to survive.
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