I joined the St. Louis Club as promised to Barbara, and ended up being invited to the vast golf course owned by the Chelsea family.
A neatly mowed lawn covers the entire field, creating a verdant landscape. Gazing at the endless, unobstructed field, reaching toward the sky, one feels as if the world is nothing but sky blue and green.
A white tent has been erected in the corner, resembling a waiting room, and beneath a sunshade, a dessert table, wine, champagne, and other items are set out. It also appears that there are quite a few members.
Not only the smartly dressed upper class but also many modestly dressed middle-class people were seen. They saluted and greeted Commander Chelsea, the chairman. Their expressions of gratitude for the help seemed more like a human touch.
"I think it would be great if the winner of this anniversary shooting competition came from our St. Louis Club. What do you think, Count Rotsilt?"
Commander Chelsea repeatedly patted Barbara on the back for successfully recruiting us, his face beaming with pride. The Commander's gray eyes doggedly followed Noah. Standing next to him, my profile stung. Noah remained resolute.
“Well, I’m busy.”
“Can’t you show your manly side to your wife?”
The commander, dressed in a lounge suit and a bowler hat, smiled at me kindly. Barbara, with her arms crossed, covered her lips with one hand as she spoke to me.
"The prize money is enormous. It's a solid gold trophy, and with so many people participating, it's a whopping 100,000 pounds."
The capitalist within me awakened, and I kept tapping away at the calculator. It was on a whole other level than the prize money from a golf tournament. I glanced at Noah. I knew he was quite skilled during his playing days, but he didn't seem to have much intention of doing it.
“What is this child’s name?”
Barbara asked, stroking Boaz's head as he sat right next to me. I answered, "Boaz." She then told him to sit, put his hands together, and lie down, then smiled at me.
"That's clever. How about Boaz joining as a member?"
Even if the membership requirements are low, isn't that too biased?
“I’ll ask. His opinion is important.”
I gave a vague answer, examining the hickory club in my hand. Barbara, in her deep willow-colored bloomers, seemed to blend in with the field.
“Have you ever played golf?”
"No."
I tried it out, and it was a quintessential hobby for the wealthy in my world. Now, my original life and world feel like an utterly unrealistic fantasy.
"I'll teach you here on the beginner tee box. It's easy. Just put the ball in that hole."
“Yes, thank you.”
Barbara began laying out some rules and explanations. Noah was still held captive by Commander Chelsea, enduring a lengthy persuasion. Suddenly, Boaz approached, wagging his tail, and the Commander picked him up in a hug. He was over 190 cm tall and had a formidable physique, making the large dog look like a small puppy. He also had a powerful voice.
“How cute! It looks like he was a military dog!”
Commander Chelsea was a generous man, and Barbara, despite being the daughter of a wealthy, prominent military officer, wasn't arrogant. Unlike my selfish self, I found spending time with them quite enjoyable.
It was a leisurely weekend. A blissful time when I could do nothing. While Noah was out, I rolled around in bed until the afternoon, watching the sky turn a rosy shade. Then, a maid came into my room.
"A woman named Ayla Delson has come to see you. Did you make an appointment in advance? If not, I'll have a harsh word with her and send her away."
She came to see me in person? Confused, I slowly got up and smoothed my disheveled hair.
“Please show her to my room. And please bring me the tea I brought from Cynthia.”
"All right."
Soon after, there was a knock on the door, and Ayla, dressed in a plain, plain one-piece dress with long hair flowing down her face, entered with an awkward smile. She had become even more pale over the past few days, looking like a withered wildflower, deprived of sunlight.
“What’s going on?”
I asked in a nonchalant tone. Her pale cheeks and bluish eyes were shadowed by eyelashes.
“I, I wanted to give you this... I’m on vacation until tomorrow, so I stopped by while I was passing by.”
She handed me a stuffed doll she had made herself.
It's the same cat doll I gave you before, only the color is different, it has button eyes, and is covered with cloth.
“Thank you for coming all the way to give it to me in person.”
“I think it would be better if there were two of them. It’s lonely alone.”
I chuckled at the childlike, innocent thought. My laughter flushed her cheeks with a delightful rosy glow.
I answered, carefully placing the new cat doll next to the doll on the display case across from me.
“You want me to be friends with the cat you gave me back then? That’s a cute idea.”
“Yes, since I don’t have any friends...”
I sat back down, picked up my teacup, and took a sip. It was fragrant, but left a bitter aftertaste on my tongue. It seemed the maid had failed to adjust the water temperature for the small-leaf black tea leaves.
“Why aren’t there any? There are so many people in the palace.”
“Everyone hates me. My coworkers don’t want to share a room with me, so I’m using a room alone.”
“You're a good person, so why would they hate you? It’s strange.”
"Isn't it a good thing to have a single room?" I thought complacently, when I suddenly realized she was a government official. I'd long since forgotten my prejudices, so I'd forgotten. I quickly tried to change the subject.
"So what are you planning on doing after quitting your job as a maid? A doll shop? A baby store?"
“I don’t dare to quit.”
The tea was bitter and astringent, so I felt a little irritated, but I gave a vague answer and let it go.
“Then I guess you should keep going.”
"Madam, you must be frustrated with me, too. I'm sorry. I feel like I'm stupid, too."
“Don’t belittle yourself when you haven’t done anything wrong.”
Her eyes were slightly moist. "Don't cry in front of me, I'll kick you out," I thought, clicking my tongue inwardly as I slammed the teacup down with a clatter.
"Is it wrong to not be able to make decisions quickly? Everyone has different thoughts and personalities. It's indeed frustrating for the onlookers."
“It became even harder to make decisions after seeing the first decision I made on my own initiative lead to a more painful outcome.”
"How can people always make the right choices? Only uninvolved third parties can make objective judgments. Emotions can also lead to mistakes."
Pain. I was eventually used by Mastiff, dumped, or something like that. Men are everywhere in the world, after all. I tilted my head, smiled, and offered the best solution.
"Can I introduce you to a good man? My secretary is handsome and solid. He's as tall as my husband and has a lot of money from his business. There's a bit of an age difference, but I think you'd be a good match for someone older and more dependable."
“Oh, he’s cool. But it’s okay, thank you.”
Maybe she's not into men. Maybe she likes men who look dangerous and fierce, like Mastiff. I tried to think of good-looking bad guys around me, but only Noah came to mind, so I quickly gave up.
"I don't know many people either. The only people I've decided to be friends with are a pilot in Chintya and a six-year-old boy, young master."
“As expected, you only keep noble and excellent people as friends. You are so intelligent, Madam.”
Ayla, who had been smiling, spoke with admiration. "No one has ever asked me to be their friend. Why are you misunderstanding me like that?"
"There are no conditions for being friends. If you're compatible, you're friends. I don't take just anyone as a friend, but that's not what I'm looking for."
“Well then, yes...”
Ayla paused, starting to say something, and her face turned inwardly displeased. She absentmindedly brought her lips to the teacup, then, startled by the heat, pulled it away. Like a startled puppy, I almost burst out laughing.
“It didn’t burn? Blow on it and drink it.”
Ayla, who had been watching me with an awkward smile, did as she was told, letting the tea cool and drinking it carefully. My eyebrows twitched, wondering if it was still hot.
Her eyes widened as she took a sip of the tea infused with flower petals. Judging by the way her lips curled upward, she seemed to like it. Even after drinking tasteless tea, she still made that expression.
"It's delicious. I can taste such a beautiful fragrance. It's like my mouth is filled with the happy scent of flowers."
“That’s a romantic expression.”
“Oh, thank you.”
Clearly, having worked as a maid for a noble family for a long time, and even as a maid in the royal palace, she would be well-versed in visiting etiquette. It seems she possesses even basic manners.
There must be a reason why a timid woman came to me out of the blue and without any manners.
“So, isn’t there something else you want to talk about?”
At my direct question, Ayla's eyes darted to me, then to the cat figurines standing amicably on the display case. She cupped her teacup with her hands, bowed her head, hesitating as if she had something to say. Her chapped lips trembled and quivered. Just like that first day, when I asked her about the bruises.
"... Countess."
She finally decided to speak her mind, sighing deeply and looking around. Her once-bright, sky-blue eyes were gradually becoming more and more depressed.
“Tell me.”
Ayla, who had been hesitating as she stared at me with her arms crossed, began biting her fingernails, perhaps out of unconscious habit. Her face, which had once been slightly brighter, withered again.
I don't know why, but I really hate that pitiful expression.
“No, I’ll be going now. Thank you for the tea.”
She didn't speak again. For her to give something meant she wanted help. She was a woman who had never received help without asking for anything in return. So, considering herself to have nothing but her body, she probably didn't ask me for help when I asked about her bruises. Adding to her timid nature, she seemed afraid of causing harm to those around her.
"Is it so?"
I answered nonchalantly.
In fact, even if she hadn't given me the doll, she might have helped me as much as possible. She's gentle and kind. But she can't do anything unless you ask her first.
"Woof!"
“Oh my! Hello.”
I heard Ayla's panicked voice. Boaz, who had entered my room, looked at her with a bright expression and panted. She shifted slightly, perhaps frightened by the large dog approaching.
“Don’t be afraid. His name is Boaz.”
“Oh, yes. Boaz.”
Boaz was sniffing around, wagging his tail, trying to figure her out.
“You’re a good boy, you’re a good boy.”
She mustered up the courage to stroke Boaz, then nodded to me, indicating she was leaving. However, looking at those emaciated arms, I felt as if, as a Korean, I could no longer bear it.
"Wait a minute, it's dinner time. Let's eat and go. Why are you so skinny? Aren't you eating?"
For a moment, an unbearable loneliness and sadness crossed Ayla's face. It was an expression that couldn't possibly be cried. Her slightly narrowed eyes, as if nothing had happened, widened into a rounded shape.
"I bought something delicious while playing outside today. It was from that famous chimney bread shop in Francia. I'll buy it for you next time. Thank you for your concern. You're really... so kind."
Boaz circled in front of Ayla and rubbed his snout against her belly. She flinched and left the room without even saying goodbye. Boaz followed suit.
I watched Ayla's long hair flutter like a kite as she fled through the window. Boaz seemed to be escorting her to the front door. Suddenly, Celine's words came to mind.
'They say she was bitten by a fierce dog.'
I looked back at the two palm-sized dolls leaning against each other and felt a bad feeling, but decided not to care anymore.
'Even if you see it, pretend not to see it. Even if you hear it, pretend not to hear it.'
This was advice from Celine, who lived as a bystander. My stomach ached, and my mouth felt bitter. It must have been the tasteless tea.
From that day on, whenever I happened to see Ayla, she'd just smile and say hello, but she didn't say anything else. I could only see her growing more pale and withered with each passing day. She still didn't speak, and I didn't ask her.
But despite all my repeated promises, I ended up getting involved in her business.
A neatly mowed lawn covers the entire field, creating a verdant landscape. Gazing at the endless, unobstructed field, reaching toward the sky, one feels as if the world is nothing but sky blue and green.
A white tent has been erected in the corner, resembling a waiting room, and beneath a sunshade, a dessert table, wine, champagne, and other items are set out. It also appears that there are quite a few members.
Not only the smartly dressed upper class but also many modestly dressed middle-class people were seen. They saluted and greeted Commander Chelsea, the chairman. Their expressions of gratitude for the help seemed more like a human touch.
"I think it would be great if the winner of this anniversary shooting competition came from our St. Louis Club. What do you think, Count Rotsilt?"
Commander Chelsea repeatedly patted Barbara on the back for successfully recruiting us, his face beaming with pride. The Commander's gray eyes doggedly followed Noah. Standing next to him, my profile stung. Noah remained resolute.
“Well, I’m busy.”
“Can’t you show your manly side to your wife?”
The commander, dressed in a lounge suit and a bowler hat, smiled at me kindly. Barbara, with her arms crossed, covered her lips with one hand as she spoke to me.
"The prize money is enormous. It's a solid gold trophy, and with so many people participating, it's a whopping 100,000 pounds."
The capitalist within me awakened, and I kept tapping away at the calculator. It was on a whole other level than the prize money from a golf tournament. I glanced at Noah. I knew he was quite skilled during his playing days, but he didn't seem to have much intention of doing it.
“What is this child’s name?”
Barbara asked, stroking Boaz's head as he sat right next to me. I answered, "Boaz." She then told him to sit, put his hands together, and lie down, then smiled at me.
"That's clever. How about Boaz joining as a member?"
Even if the membership requirements are low, isn't that too biased?
“I’ll ask. His opinion is important.”
I gave a vague answer, examining the hickory club in my hand. Barbara, in her deep willow-colored bloomers, seemed to blend in with the field.
“Have you ever played golf?”
"No."
I tried it out, and it was a quintessential hobby for the wealthy in my world. Now, my original life and world feel like an utterly unrealistic fantasy.
"I'll teach you here on the beginner tee box. It's easy. Just put the ball in that hole."
“Yes, thank you.”
Barbara began laying out some rules and explanations. Noah was still held captive by Commander Chelsea, enduring a lengthy persuasion. Suddenly, Boaz approached, wagging his tail, and the Commander picked him up in a hug. He was over 190 cm tall and had a formidable physique, making the large dog look like a small puppy. He also had a powerful voice.
“How cute! It looks like he was a military dog!”
Commander Chelsea was a generous man, and Barbara, despite being the daughter of a wealthy, prominent military officer, wasn't arrogant. Unlike my selfish self, I found spending time with them quite enjoyable.
***
It was a leisurely weekend. A blissful time when I could do nothing. While Noah was out, I rolled around in bed until the afternoon, watching the sky turn a rosy shade. Then, a maid came into my room.
"A woman named Ayla Delson has come to see you. Did you make an appointment in advance? If not, I'll have a harsh word with her and send her away."
She came to see me in person? Confused, I slowly got up and smoothed my disheveled hair.
“Please show her to my room. And please bring me the tea I brought from Cynthia.”
"All right."
Soon after, there was a knock on the door, and Ayla, dressed in a plain, plain one-piece dress with long hair flowing down her face, entered with an awkward smile. She had become even more pale over the past few days, looking like a withered wildflower, deprived of sunlight.
“What’s going on?”
I asked in a nonchalant tone. Her pale cheeks and bluish eyes were shadowed by eyelashes.
“I, I wanted to give you this... I’m on vacation until tomorrow, so I stopped by while I was passing by.”
She handed me a stuffed doll she had made herself.
It's the same cat doll I gave you before, only the color is different, it has button eyes, and is covered with cloth.
“Thank you for coming all the way to give it to me in person.”
“I think it would be better if there were two of them. It’s lonely alone.”
I chuckled at the childlike, innocent thought. My laughter flushed her cheeks with a delightful rosy glow.
I answered, carefully placing the new cat doll next to the doll on the display case across from me.
“You want me to be friends with the cat you gave me back then? That’s a cute idea.”
“Yes, since I don’t have any friends...”
I sat back down, picked up my teacup, and took a sip. It was fragrant, but left a bitter aftertaste on my tongue. It seemed the maid had failed to adjust the water temperature for the small-leaf black tea leaves.
“Why aren’t there any? There are so many people in the palace.”
“Everyone hates me. My coworkers don’t want to share a room with me, so I’m using a room alone.”
“You're a good person, so why would they hate you? It’s strange.”
"Isn't it a good thing to have a single room?" I thought complacently, when I suddenly realized she was a government official. I'd long since forgotten my prejudices, so I'd forgotten. I quickly tried to change the subject.
"So what are you planning on doing after quitting your job as a maid? A doll shop? A baby store?"
“I don’t dare to quit.”
The tea was bitter and astringent, so I felt a little irritated, but I gave a vague answer and let it go.
“Then I guess you should keep going.”
"Madam, you must be frustrated with me, too. I'm sorry. I feel like I'm stupid, too."
“Don’t belittle yourself when you haven’t done anything wrong.”
Her eyes were slightly moist. "Don't cry in front of me, I'll kick you out," I thought, clicking my tongue inwardly as I slammed the teacup down with a clatter.
"Is it wrong to not be able to make decisions quickly? Everyone has different thoughts and personalities. It's indeed frustrating for the onlookers."
“It became even harder to make decisions after seeing the first decision I made on my own initiative lead to a more painful outcome.”
"How can people always make the right choices? Only uninvolved third parties can make objective judgments. Emotions can also lead to mistakes."
Pain. I was eventually used by Mastiff, dumped, or something like that. Men are everywhere in the world, after all. I tilted my head, smiled, and offered the best solution.
"Can I introduce you to a good man? My secretary is handsome and solid. He's as tall as my husband and has a lot of money from his business. There's a bit of an age difference, but I think you'd be a good match for someone older and more dependable."
“Oh, he’s cool. But it’s okay, thank you.”
Maybe she's not into men. Maybe she likes men who look dangerous and fierce, like Mastiff. I tried to think of good-looking bad guys around me, but only Noah came to mind, so I quickly gave up.
"I don't know many people either. The only people I've decided to be friends with are a pilot in Chintya and a six-year-old boy, young master."
“As expected, you only keep noble and excellent people as friends. You are so intelligent, Madam.”
Ayla, who had been smiling, spoke with admiration. "No one has ever asked me to be their friend. Why are you misunderstanding me like that?"
"There are no conditions for being friends. If you're compatible, you're friends. I don't take just anyone as a friend, but that's not what I'm looking for."
“Well then, yes...”
Ayla paused, starting to say something, and her face turned inwardly displeased. She absentmindedly brought her lips to the teacup, then, startled by the heat, pulled it away. Like a startled puppy, I almost burst out laughing.
“It didn’t burn? Blow on it and drink it.”
Ayla, who had been watching me with an awkward smile, did as she was told, letting the tea cool and drinking it carefully. My eyebrows twitched, wondering if it was still hot.
Her eyes widened as she took a sip of the tea infused with flower petals. Judging by the way her lips curled upward, she seemed to like it. Even after drinking tasteless tea, she still made that expression.
"It's delicious. I can taste such a beautiful fragrance. It's like my mouth is filled with the happy scent of flowers."
“That’s a romantic expression.”
“Oh, thank you.”
Clearly, having worked as a maid for a noble family for a long time, and even as a maid in the royal palace, she would be well-versed in visiting etiquette. It seems she possesses even basic manners.
There must be a reason why a timid woman came to me out of the blue and without any manners.
“So, isn’t there something else you want to talk about?”
At my direct question, Ayla's eyes darted to me, then to the cat figurines standing amicably on the display case. She cupped her teacup with her hands, bowed her head, hesitating as if she had something to say. Her chapped lips trembled and quivered. Just like that first day, when I asked her about the bruises.
"... Countess."
She finally decided to speak her mind, sighing deeply and looking around. Her once-bright, sky-blue eyes were gradually becoming more and more depressed.
“Tell me.”
Ayla, who had been hesitating as she stared at me with her arms crossed, began biting her fingernails, perhaps out of unconscious habit. Her face, which had once been slightly brighter, withered again.
I don't know why, but I really hate that pitiful expression.
“No, I’ll be going now. Thank you for the tea.”
She didn't speak again. For her to give something meant she wanted help. She was a woman who had never received help without asking for anything in return. So, considering herself to have nothing but her body, she probably didn't ask me for help when I asked about her bruises. Adding to her timid nature, she seemed afraid of causing harm to those around her.
"Is it so?"
I answered nonchalantly.
In fact, even if she hadn't given me the doll, she might have helped me as much as possible. She's gentle and kind. But she can't do anything unless you ask her first.
"Woof!"
“Oh my! Hello.”
I heard Ayla's panicked voice. Boaz, who had entered my room, looked at her with a bright expression and panted. She shifted slightly, perhaps frightened by the large dog approaching.
“Don’t be afraid. His name is Boaz.”
“Oh, yes. Boaz.”
Boaz was sniffing around, wagging his tail, trying to figure her out.
“You’re a good boy, you’re a good boy.”
She mustered up the courage to stroke Boaz, then nodded to me, indicating she was leaving. However, looking at those emaciated arms, I felt as if, as a Korean, I could no longer bear it.
"Wait a minute, it's dinner time. Let's eat and go. Why are you so skinny? Aren't you eating?"
For a moment, an unbearable loneliness and sadness crossed Ayla's face. It was an expression that couldn't possibly be cried. Her slightly narrowed eyes, as if nothing had happened, widened into a rounded shape.
"I bought something delicious while playing outside today. It was from that famous chimney bread shop in Francia. I'll buy it for you next time. Thank you for your concern. You're really... so kind."
Boaz circled in front of Ayla and rubbed his snout against her belly. She flinched and left the room without even saying goodbye. Boaz followed suit.
I watched Ayla's long hair flutter like a kite as she fled through the window. Boaz seemed to be escorting her to the front door. Suddenly, Celine's words came to mind.
'They say she was bitten by a fierce dog.'
I looked back at the two palm-sized dolls leaning against each other and felt a bad feeling, but decided not to care anymore.
'Even if you see it, pretend not to see it. Even if you hear it, pretend not to hear it.'
This was advice from Celine, who lived as a bystander. My stomach ached, and my mouth felt bitter. It must have been the tasteless tea.
***
From that day on, whenever I happened to see Ayla, she'd just smile and say hello, but she didn't say anything else. I could only see her growing more pale and withered with each passing day. She still didn't speak, and I didn't ask her.
But despite all my repeated promises, I ended up getting involved in her business.
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