#134. True Love
A few days before reaching Asopos.
Asherad became close to the son who approached him. This guy seemed to treat him like a total hero, having saved the women of the city.
What would his expression be if his mother told him that she was afraid he would mate with another man? Of course, he tried hard to hide that twist.
This lovely boy had no idea that the man who gave him his blood would kill him.
Sometimes, he felt a twist in his stomach. He had a cruel urge to destroy that innocence. If he did, it would only lead to irreversible results. Asherad had ignored Ian, even throwing away his superficial kindness. Ian was strange. He looked exactly like him, but his smile and eyes resembled Daphne's.
At the same time, he was friendly and loved by everyone.
Unlike himself.
Yes, unlike himself.
It was annoying, and he tried to keep his distance as much as possible, but this guy came closer and held out his hand, begging to be petted. Daphne hated that expression, but this son was just like a 'puppy'.
He never thought that people would hate him, that he would be loved by everyone, and that his father, who gave him blood, would love him even more.
Following Asherad around like crazy, and begging him to hug him.
He reacts to everything in a big way, wants to share his feelings, and watches every gesture and step with sparkling eyes of longing.
So Ian looked good.
His own seed that he forcibly conceived to keep Daphne.
He had blonde hair like Daphne, and his eyes and face were exactly like his. However, unlike his own, his face was clear. Perhaps because he received a lot of love. His bright appearance made him feel angry, but Asherad was gradually, gradually... smiling.
When he saw this child, the anger he had felt disappeared.
He came to this place, pushed to the very end, and thought.
It was only then that he realized that he wanted to be like this child.
He wanted to be free like this child, and live in a world where love was a given, not hatred, jealousy, strife, anger, or violence.
Unlike himself, who sometimes walked with a bruised body and pretended to be dignified, the boy with clean legs ran through the barren battlefield like a young deer, dyeing the surroundings with his light.
“Your Highness, it's dirty.”
“It’s okay! I’ll help you.”
Ian ran and grabbed one of the moving horses and pulled it. Ian always helped someone. But it was an act of giving love, not an act of being loved. The young boy already knew how to give.
“Isn’t he such a lovely person?”
Leon, who was nearby, said.
“Do you love that look?”
“Yes. Look at that little body of his leading the horse.”
Could this be the case for a delicate and precious sprout growing on a barren land? People say that the insignificant sprout is cute, looking at it. He must have had a time like that, too. He must have had that face, that look. Why couldn't he have grown up in the love of everyone?
Asherad thought back to his childhood, and thought again. If he had lived in the Duke of Turbol's house, would he have been treated with affection?
He doesn't know.
Asherad thought of Duke Turbol. Fortunately, he survived. But there was no contact. What should I say to him if I see him again? Asherad looked at Ian, lost in thought.
"Father!"
Somehow, he couldn't escape when he heard that sound. Not 'Your Majesty' or 'Father'. Not a title like that, just 'Father'. He had said that word to the late Emperor whom he had killed, but it definitely felt different.
Now Ian was helping clean the weapons. He wasn't allowed to clean sharp objects like swords, so he was cleaning other things.
“Father, I cleaned it all. It’s round and clean.”
Does this guy know that that round thing is a hammer that crushes people's heads? As he looked at the glossy surface, Asherad patted his head as if he had done a good job. A smile appeared on Asherad's lips as he watched Ian's giggling face.
He didn't try to love this kid, but he kept coming closer and infiltrating him.
If you can't see it, you're curious, and if you see it, it steals your gaze.
Was it the same for Duke Turbol? Did he feel the same way when he saw himself? Did it happen to Ioannis? Did I really receive this kind of attention? Thinking of those who were not around, Asherad felt his guard against the child ease.
If this child had been born in the palace, he would never have loved this child. It would have been just a tool to capture Daphne. Of course.
Living in a narrow barracks, not in the vast palace, was enough for them to become close. He had to see Ian, even if he didn't want to. He had to protect Daphne, his only woman, and Ian, his child. He thought as he watched Ian and Daphne sleeping in the narrow barracks.
It was a place that was clearly much shabbier than the palace, but it felt like heaven. In the midst of all this, Ian saw him approaching and hugged him. It seemed like the three of them would end up lying on the narrow bed.
Why do you keep coming to me? To use me? Because I am the Emperor? Enjoying this strange peace, Asherad fell into a deep sleep for the first time in a long time.
Ian was noisy.
"Father!"
“...”
“Father, this is a bird I made.”
When Asherad gave him a dagger, he carved a bird out of wood and made a fuss. It was more like two circles stuck together than a bird. Asherad asked as Ian held out something smaller than his palm.
“Why that?”
“It’s a gift for my father.”
"What?"
“Take it with you when you fight.”
When Asherad didn't reach out, Ian quickly put it in his hand and disappeared. The knights' laughter could be heard.
“Your Highness is so self-willed. It must be difficult to raise you in the palace.”
The knights of Peneus, who had been in despair, regained their energy. Asherad also thought. Should I take that guy to the palace? Should I?
He thought of Ian in the palace. He imagined Ian running around the garden, holding the hands of noble children. It was funny to think of him being so charming in front of those sly nobles.
“It’s too much for that personality.”
“No. Where would the blood go? You just need to educate him. He will be as intelligent as Your Majesty, so I will assist him.”
Asherad chuckled.
He thinks he'll throw away the book because he doesn't want to read it. Or he'll dodge in various ways. Or he'll tease the teacher. Ian will definitely live differently from Asherad.
Asherad laughed as he recalled that moment.
If he were to return to the Peneus Palace, would he go with Ian? Would Daphne go with him? He knew that her current form was to hold her in the name of 'protection'.
What happens when this protection ends?
The woman will run away again, and he will be left alone, Asherad thought, lonely. He decided to talk to Daphne.
But their story is already over.
Didn't Daphne tie the knot? That day, Daphne and Asherad's bodies were entwined on a whim. Nothing happened after that.
So, the day of separation has arrived.
Before he set out, he got up and looked at the people lying down. Looking at Daphne and Ian, who were hugging each other tightly, he suddenly remembered that the wounds he had received from the bet with Prince Pindus had healed.
Daphne and Ian were always there to change the bandages. He's had countless wounds, but he's never wanted them to heal as slowly as they did.
That peaceful world was definitely something he had never experienced before. As if it were a dream, that sweet world came to an end like that.
He experienced true love.
That's why Asherad didn't even say goodbye. All he had to say to Ian yesterday was what he had said to him.
I want to kiss her goodbye. But, the situation doesn't allow it... He let out a small sigh. And it seemed like their relationship was over.
“Her Majesty the Empress and His Highness the Prince have returned. I believe Thalassa’s pursuit party has been dispatched.”
“Prepare for battle!”
The people took out their armor and armed themselves. The King of Pindus became irritated.
“In the midst of all this, there’s an Empress?”
In the midst of all this, he says this. Everyone is preparing for battle, and when the enemy forces come, the King runs out with great courage.
However, the battlefield was the most difficult and easiest place to assassinate.
That is, it was difficult for someone to hide on their battlefield, but when a battle actually broke out, it was easy for someone who knew' to kill them.
Asherad volunteered to be the King's escort and stood beside the King of Pindus. It was quite a joke that the King, who should have been the first to go, was keeping his place at the back. However, the knights of the King of Pindus served their lord faithfully, and even the knights of the escort all went to the battlefield.
As soon as they disappeared, Asherad swung his sword absentmindedly, as if he was always supposed to do so.
“Ouch!”
He stabbed the lungs so that they couldn't make a sound. The King was startled by the excruciating pain. Asherad smirked at the sight of his face collapsing, spitting out blood.
“Your younger brother asked me to say goodbye.”
“...”
“And you have to say goodbye to me, too.”
Asherad stabbed the King in the eye. It was the eye that had been looking at Daphne with a sinister look. But the King could not even scream. All that could be heard was a gasp of air. He had already spoken to the younger brother of the King of Pindus.
They declared that if the King were killed and his brother ascended the throne, they would be able to secure the help of Pindus when they returned to the empire. In other words, the real ally was not Tygan, the King of Pindus, but the King's brother, Duke Brooks.
Asherad numbly raised his sword and tore open his mouth. The mouth that had spoken dirty words to Daphne. Where should he cut next...?
But there was no time. He had to get to Daphne and Ian. Asherad stabbed the squirming corpse in the neck and ran out.
He felt the enemy retreat at his appearance. He raised his sword and cut, cut, and cut the enemies again as he went to where Daphne and Ian were.
He regretted spending time punishing the King. He thought he would be okay because he had a guard of knights, but they were all dead, and only the two of them were left alive. So Asherad rescued Daphne and Ian again.
And when he thought the arrow was headed towards them, he too moved his body first. That moment, that brief moment. The moment when his wide arms embraced his wife and his child.
He felt somehow fulfilled.
He should have tried this a long time ago.
I should have held you once before. Your things, the things I love, are so full in my arms. Why was there nothing in my arms? Why did I keep getting further away?
He smiled as he looked at Daphne's son.
The moment the arrow pierced his flesh through the gap in his armor, he felt a sense of elation.
This is it.
This is what it means to protect.
I found out another one.
He knew for sure what kind of love Ioannis had. He knew why it was called love. So he knew for a brief moment for sure what kind of love he had had.
'Wishing that person happiness. Wishing that person happiness. Wanting that person to be happy. Wanting that person to be happy, even if I get hurt or die. That's love.'
You're right, Daphne.
Because of that, he could close his eyes happily.
A few days before reaching Asopos.
Asherad became close to the son who approached him. This guy seemed to treat him like a total hero, having saved the women of the city.
What would his expression be if his mother told him that she was afraid he would mate with another man? Of course, he tried hard to hide that twist.
This lovely boy had no idea that the man who gave him his blood would kill him.
Sometimes, he felt a twist in his stomach. He had a cruel urge to destroy that innocence. If he did, it would only lead to irreversible results. Asherad had ignored Ian, even throwing away his superficial kindness. Ian was strange. He looked exactly like him, but his smile and eyes resembled Daphne's.
At the same time, he was friendly and loved by everyone.
Unlike himself.
Yes, unlike himself.
It was annoying, and he tried to keep his distance as much as possible, but this guy came closer and held out his hand, begging to be petted. Daphne hated that expression, but this son was just like a 'puppy'.
He never thought that people would hate him, that he would be loved by everyone, and that his father, who gave him blood, would love him even more.
Following Asherad around like crazy, and begging him to hug him.
He reacts to everything in a big way, wants to share his feelings, and watches every gesture and step with sparkling eyes of longing.
So Ian looked good.
His own seed that he forcibly conceived to keep Daphne.
He had blonde hair like Daphne, and his eyes and face were exactly like his. However, unlike his own, his face was clear. Perhaps because he received a lot of love. His bright appearance made him feel angry, but Asherad was gradually, gradually... smiling.
When he saw this child, the anger he had felt disappeared.
He came to this place, pushed to the very end, and thought.
It was only then that he realized that he wanted to be like this child.
He wanted to be free like this child, and live in a world where love was a given, not hatred, jealousy, strife, anger, or violence.
Unlike himself, who sometimes walked with a bruised body and pretended to be dignified, the boy with clean legs ran through the barren battlefield like a young deer, dyeing the surroundings with his light.
“Your Highness, it's dirty.”
“It’s okay! I’ll help you.”
Ian ran and grabbed one of the moving horses and pulled it. Ian always helped someone. But it was an act of giving love, not an act of being loved. The young boy already knew how to give.
“Isn’t he such a lovely person?”
Leon, who was nearby, said.
“Do you love that look?”
“Yes. Look at that little body of his leading the horse.”
Could this be the case for a delicate and precious sprout growing on a barren land? People say that the insignificant sprout is cute, looking at it. He must have had a time like that, too. He must have had that face, that look. Why couldn't he have grown up in the love of everyone?
Asherad thought back to his childhood, and thought again. If he had lived in the Duke of Turbol's house, would he have been treated with affection?
He doesn't know.
Asherad thought of Duke Turbol. Fortunately, he survived. But there was no contact. What should I say to him if I see him again? Asherad looked at Ian, lost in thought.
"Father!"
Somehow, he couldn't escape when he heard that sound. Not 'Your Majesty' or 'Father'. Not a title like that, just 'Father'. He had said that word to the late Emperor whom he had killed, but it definitely felt different.
Now Ian was helping clean the weapons. He wasn't allowed to clean sharp objects like swords, so he was cleaning other things.
“Father, I cleaned it all. It’s round and clean.”
Does this guy know that that round thing is a hammer that crushes people's heads? As he looked at the glossy surface, Asherad patted his head as if he had done a good job. A smile appeared on Asherad's lips as he watched Ian's giggling face.
He didn't try to love this kid, but he kept coming closer and infiltrating him.
If you can't see it, you're curious, and if you see it, it steals your gaze.
Was it the same for Duke Turbol? Did he feel the same way when he saw himself? Did it happen to Ioannis? Did I really receive this kind of attention? Thinking of those who were not around, Asherad felt his guard against the child ease.
If this child had been born in the palace, he would never have loved this child. It would have been just a tool to capture Daphne. Of course.
Living in a narrow barracks, not in the vast palace, was enough for them to become close. He had to see Ian, even if he didn't want to. He had to protect Daphne, his only woman, and Ian, his child. He thought as he watched Ian and Daphne sleeping in the narrow barracks.
It was a place that was clearly much shabbier than the palace, but it felt like heaven. In the midst of all this, Ian saw him approaching and hugged him. It seemed like the three of them would end up lying on the narrow bed.
Why do you keep coming to me? To use me? Because I am the Emperor? Enjoying this strange peace, Asherad fell into a deep sleep for the first time in a long time.
Ian was noisy.
"Father!"
“...”
“Father, this is a bird I made.”
When Asherad gave him a dagger, he carved a bird out of wood and made a fuss. It was more like two circles stuck together than a bird. Asherad asked as Ian held out something smaller than his palm.
“Why that?”
“It’s a gift for my father.”
"What?"
“Take it with you when you fight.”
When Asherad didn't reach out, Ian quickly put it in his hand and disappeared. The knights' laughter could be heard.
“Your Highness is so self-willed. It must be difficult to raise you in the palace.”
The knights of Peneus, who had been in despair, regained their energy. Asherad also thought. Should I take that guy to the palace? Should I?
He thought of Ian in the palace. He imagined Ian running around the garden, holding the hands of noble children. It was funny to think of him being so charming in front of those sly nobles.
“It’s too much for that personality.”
“No. Where would the blood go? You just need to educate him. He will be as intelligent as Your Majesty, so I will assist him.”
Asherad chuckled.
He thinks he'll throw away the book because he doesn't want to read it. Or he'll dodge in various ways. Or he'll tease the teacher. Ian will definitely live differently from Asherad.
Asherad laughed as he recalled that moment.
If he were to return to the Peneus Palace, would he go with Ian? Would Daphne go with him? He knew that her current form was to hold her in the name of 'protection'.
What happens when this protection ends?
The woman will run away again, and he will be left alone, Asherad thought, lonely. He decided to talk to Daphne.
But their story is already over.
Didn't Daphne tie the knot? That day, Daphne and Asherad's bodies were entwined on a whim. Nothing happened after that.
So, the day of separation has arrived.
Before he set out, he got up and looked at the people lying down. Looking at Daphne and Ian, who were hugging each other tightly, he suddenly remembered that the wounds he had received from the bet with Prince Pindus had healed.
Daphne and Ian were always there to change the bandages. He's had countless wounds, but he's never wanted them to heal as slowly as they did.
That peaceful world was definitely something he had never experienced before. As if it were a dream, that sweet world came to an end like that.
He experienced true love.
That's why Asherad didn't even say goodbye. All he had to say to Ian yesterday was what he had said to him.
I want to kiss her goodbye. But, the situation doesn't allow it... He let out a small sigh. And it seemed like their relationship was over.
“Her Majesty the Empress and His Highness the Prince have returned. I believe Thalassa’s pursuit party has been dispatched.”
“Prepare for battle!”
The people took out their armor and armed themselves. The King of Pindus became irritated.
“In the midst of all this, there’s an Empress?”
In the midst of all this, he says this. Everyone is preparing for battle, and when the enemy forces come, the King runs out with great courage.
However, the battlefield was the most difficult and easiest place to assassinate.
That is, it was difficult for someone to hide on their battlefield, but when a battle actually broke out, it was easy for someone who knew' to kill them.
Asherad volunteered to be the King's escort and stood beside the King of Pindus. It was quite a joke that the King, who should have been the first to go, was keeping his place at the back. However, the knights of the King of Pindus served their lord faithfully, and even the knights of the escort all went to the battlefield.
As soon as they disappeared, Asherad swung his sword absentmindedly, as if he was always supposed to do so.
“Ouch!”
He stabbed the lungs so that they couldn't make a sound. The King was startled by the excruciating pain. Asherad smirked at the sight of his face collapsing, spitting out blood.
“Your younger brother asked me to say goodbye.”
“...”
“And you have to say goodbye to me, too.”
Asherad stabbed the King in the eye. It was the eye that had been looking at Daphne with a sinister look. But the King could not even scream. All that could be heard was a gasp of air. He had already spoken to the younger brother of the King of Pindus.
They declared that if the King were killed and his brother ascended the throne, they would be able to secure the help of Pindus when they returned to the empire. In other words, the real ally was not Tygan, the King of Pindus, but the King's brother, Duke Brooks.
Asherad numbly raised his sword and tore open his mouth. The mouth that had spoken dirty words to Daphne. Where should he cut next...?
But there was no time. He had to get to Daphne and Ian. Asherad stabbed the squirming corpse in the neck and ran out.
He felt the enemy retreat at his appearance. He raised his sword and cut, cut, and cut the enemies again as he went to where Daphne and Ian were.
He regretted spending time punishing the King. He thought he would be okay because he had a guard of knights, but they were all dead, and only the two of them were left alive. So Asherad rescued Daphne and Ian again.
And when he thought the arrow was headed towards them, he too moved his body first. That moment, that brief moment. The moment when his wide arms embraced his wife and his child.
He felt somehow fulfilled.
He should have tried this a long time ago.
I should have held you once before. Your things, the things I love, are so full in my arms. Why was there nothing in my arms? Why did I keep getting further away?
He smiled as he looked at Daphne's son.
The moment the arrow pierced his flesh through the gap in his armor, he felt a sense of elation.
This is it.
This is what it means to protect.
I found out another one.
He knew for sure what kind of love Ioannis had. He knew why it was called love. So he knew for a brief moment for sure what kind of love he had had.
'Wishing that person happiness. Wishing that person happiness. Wanting that person to be happy. Wanting that person to be happy, even if I get hurt or die. That's love.'
You're right, Daphne.
Because of that, he could close his eyes happily.
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