#114. Proposal
When Ian was born, Derek was there to support Olivia. Derek didn't say anything during the process. He didn't point a finger at her for being pregnant with her enemy's child, but rather pitied her. When she decided to raise Ian, he didn't say anything. Once, when she asked him why he didn't say anything, he said it was her freedom.
That silent affection is just like Fabian.
Olivia had no choice but to rely on Derek. She had difficulty leaving the house to care for the child, so she could not do any economic activity. If it weren't for Derek, she would never have thought of raising this child.
He hired a nanny with money she didn't know whether it was from the Count of Locania or Derek's own money, and saved Olivia from the hardships of raising him. She was grateful to Derek. She couldn't stand the gratitude.
“Olivia.”
Derek brainwashed her by calling her name as if trying to erase 'Daphne', turning her into Olivia.
But as Ian grew up, Derek started wandering again. Once a month, once every three months. Olivia waited for Derek to return. He came back every time, but once, on the sixth month of his absence, Olivia thought Derek had left her forever.
In the first place, she had been taken care of by the order of Count Locania. She had mentally prepared herself to stand up on her own. She thought it was okay, really okay. She thought it was right not to say goodbye, with only bitter gratitude.
But when Derek came back on a snowy winter day, she collapsed at her feet, sobbing. Derek looked shocked, then smiled so brightly that it was impossible to say anything.
“Have you been waiting?”
“...I think so.”
"Yes."
It was a short conversation. But Derek still didn't stay long. But after that, the maximum time he went out was about two weeks, and if it seemed like it would be long, he told Olivia and left. Later, she found out that he was a famous prosecutor, and because of that, he was in charge of escorting merchants and important figures. And since Olivia cried in front of him, he didn't take on escorts who went too far.
On the days Derek would come home, Olivia would cook the most delicious food she could and share it with him. He would always bring gifts for Olivia and Ian, and they would open them after dinner.
They talked a lot. Derek gradually started to grumble about the hardships he had while working, and Olivia talked about the frustrations and insecurities she had as a child. Sometimes Derek would burst out laughing, and he said he found Olivia's innocent view of the world amusing.
They were good friends and companions.
Derek considered this place his 'home' to return to, and Olivia raised a child while waiting for Derek. Anyone could see that it was a couple.
But even after six years of pretending to be a married couple, nothing happened between Olivia and Derek. They went around saying that he was the father of their child and were actually close, but they still slept in separate rooms and didn't do anything more than that.
It was strange. Still, Olivia felt safe and secure when she was with Derek. But Daphne also knew. Derek would never live with her.
That's why he told Ian not to call him father.
Derek and she are not a real couple. If Ian thought of Derek as his father, it would only cause them both pain.
“It’s okay, Olivia. I can be his father.”
Olivia bowed her head as she heard Derek's words. Father. Olivia didn't know what it was. She had never had one. But sometimes, when she saw Derek's strong side, she wondered if he was a father.
Could this man be that kind of person to Ian?
“No, you can’t. Derek would hate to be that kid’s father.”
A child who received the blood of an enemy. A child of Asherad who killed his beloved younger brother. Derek looked down and let out a small sigh at those words. Shr knows. Derek had a complicated expression every time he saw Ian. It was understandable. Ian had picked on Asherad.
At first, the face that resembled Olivia gradually began to resemble him. Olivia was also often startled whenever she saw him.
“He is the son of the enemy who killed my brother, but he is not his son because he was not raised by that man.”
“...”
“Olivia, I think the one who raised him should be his father. If I had considered him the child of my enemy, I would have killed him the moment he was born.”
Olivia felt her breath catch in her throat at Derek's words. Derek had never called the Count of Locania his father because he had not raised him. If the person who raised Ian was his father, then Derek was his father. Derek had been with Ian since he was born.
“I don’t really love him. I can’t say such hypocritical things.”
Olivia nodded at Derek's words. It was obvious. It was his child, who resembled Asherad.
“But I will love him as much as I can. Because I don’t hate him.”
It was Derek's tearful consideration. He was definitely older than Daphne. He said that he would embrace him even if he were the son of an enemy, because he had not grown up under an enemy.
"And..."
Derek seemed to hesitate for a moment. He rummaged through his pockets and pulled out a box. Olivia had a brief moment of foreboding. The purple square box he held out was covered in velvet and had a glossy sheen.
At first glance, it seems...
Olivia's heart pounded. Derek opened the box. It was a diamond ring on a sleek silver band.
“Let’s get married, Olivia.”
“...”
Olivia looked at the sparkling diamond. Olivia stared at the man who was proposing to her. Derek looked at her frozen face and spoke a little more forcefully.
“Marry me.”
“...”
“I will not bind you.”
Marriage. That's what Asherad and Daphne were going to do. And this man proposed to her. Olivia didn't hate this man. She liked it.
If she were to accept, this man would take responsibility for Olivia's life as her husband. He said he would also be Ian's father. But something seemed to be stuck in her throat. Derek said, looking at Olivia's sad face.
“Derek, we can’t do this.”
“...”
“I am also at fault for Fabian’s death. How could someone with such a sin marry the dead man’s brother?”
It was Olivia's reluctance. Living a comfortable life with the dead brother of Fabian? Her face grew hot. She couldn't do that.
“I told you it wasn’t your fault.”
“Do you think the Count would leave me alone if he knew about this situation?”
“That man is not my father.”
“There is no such thing as love between us.”
Derek's expression broke at Olivia's words. Even if Derek would never come here again, Olivia had to make sure. Otherwise, there would be more victims like Fabian. Tears welled up in her eyes.
“I don’t think I have any either?”
Olivia was shocked by those words. What does he mean? Derek loves me? What the...
As Olivia looked confused, Derek put a hand on her shoulder. He met Olivia's blue eyes and gaze.
“You don’t have to feel too burdened. But I want to be your family by your side. I will be the person who can take away your anxiety.”
“...”
“I will always protect you.”
“...”
"I love you."
In that six-year moment, Olivia gradually began to like this person. However, she did not 'love' him. She felt comfortable when they were together. He was like a tree, a big tree, just like her. Should I accept that love for Ian's future, for my future?
Olivia hesitated. Derek, seeing her worries, patted her head and left the room. A little later, Olivia went into the living room. Derek seemed to have just left the house. That was understandable. He probably needed time to think, too.
Ian was playing with his toys by himself.
'I love you.'
Olivia repeated those words.
She knew the other voice that said that. The man who had thrown her into the abyss and trapped her in his grasp. The smooth bridge of his nose that parted his jet-black hair. The image of the man smiling brightly while blinking his long eyelashes came to mind.
Asherad.
Asherad always said he loved her, but he abused her and drove her to the abyss. For six years, while fearing Asherad, she soon remembered the situation Asherad was in.
A man who doesn't know how to love because he hasn't been loved.
But the foolish man who loved and tormented Daphne, who sent her into the abyss.
One day, the fearful person who will come after her.
“Mom, what’s wrong?”
Olivia didn't hear Ian's voice. When she thought of Asherad, Olivia didn't hear anyone's voice. The murderer who killed Fabian while saying he loved her, and ignored her earnest pleas not to kill her, while saying she loved him.
The murderer who killed everyone around her, crushed their hearts, and shouted that he loved them. The person she thought of, her lover.
Olivia remembered the old days, when he had come through the rain and reached out to Daphne. The drizzle was falling, and his hair was soaking wet.
Was the man deceiving her even then? What is the man doing now? Is he chasing her? Or is he in despair, embracing his own collapsing country?
At that moment, someone grabbed Olivia by the waist. She turned around in surprise and saw Asherad standing there.
“I love you.”
Could this man have been chasing her? Olivia screamed. It was as if the terrible past was repeating itself. Asherad caught me. He came to me and deceived me by saying he loved me again!
Please, please let me go! Olivia pushed Asherad with all her might. Contrary to what she thought, he wouldn't be pushed back; Asherad was easily pushed back and even fell down.
“Oh, Mom.”
Olivia came to her senses at that sound. The one who had been pushed mercilessly by Olivia's hand was none other than Ian. The child who had been pushed by his mother and was lying down looked up as if in shock. A mother who thought of him as horrible. A mother who did not love him. A mother who hated him.
Young Ian was quite smart.
Ian, who noticed the subtlety, glared at Olivia and ran away without even crying.
The door slammed shut, and Olivia fell to her knees.
“Ahhhhhhh!”
She screamed. Everything was a mess. She should have just taken the poison and died then.
Olivia became Daphne again and screamed in agony. Tears fell and soaked the floor. Then she quickly followed Ian outside.
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