This time, Karl's expression was truly spectacular.
I stood facing the sword, smiling playfully.
My friend, who looks like a young boy who only comes to my heart.
I knew full well that he would never grow from this appearance.
He didn't grow up while I was growing up.
And I know he'll still be like this in 10 years.
'Karl never told me why it wasn't growing. Not until the day I died.'
In my past life, I often thought of Callius.
I happened to see him from a distance on the day I married Viscount Pelsus at the palace.
When the golden eyes that seemed to contain sunlight looked at me in my wedding dress, I was startled.
'I thought it was a knife for a moment.'
He was a man who looked very much like Karl.
If Karl were to grow, wouldn't he be exactly that person's face?
He caught my eye right away because of his striking resemblance to my close friend Karl, and he was etched into my mind.
That day was the first and last time I saw him.
After that, whenever I saw Karl, who appeared next to me without anyone noticing, I thought of him.
If I could go back in time, I would have liked to have seen Callius up close and in detail.
The more I felt Karl was precious, the more strangely curious I became about Callius.
But then I really did go back to the past, and as soon as I realized that, funny enough, the first thought that came to my mind was that I would be able to see Callius again.
Plus, the really cool idea that through him, I can create situations that Andrea most likely doesn't want.
“Huh huh...”
Karl looked up at me with wide eyes, smiling like a villain.
"What?"
"What?"
“That smile. Something feels different than usual.”
It was a face that felt unfamiliar to me.
I shrugged my shoulders, shaking my head.
"Yes?"
“It’s strange. You’ve been acting like a different person these past few days.”
“So, you don’t like it?”
Karl grinned.
“No, I like it very much.”
I smiled broadly at Karl's words.
"Thank you."
At that moment, a noise was heard from somewhere.
I looked back at Karl, thinking I would tell him to hide before they found out.
Luckily, Karl hid himself like a ghost before I could say anything.
'It's not that fast.'
I headed to my palace, trusting that Karl would reappear in a safe place as he always did.
As I approached my palace, which was filled only with Andrea's guards, my steps became heavier.
I walked down the hallway, dragging my feet.
The corridors, with their ornate roofs and decorative railings, were only sheltered from rain and sunlight, and were very windy.
I buttoned up my collar and grumbled to myself.
'If it's this cold in late summer, what on earth are we going to do in winter?'
In fact, the place where the palace is located is in the southernmost part of the empire, so it's relatively warm. It's just that I feel particularly cold.
'It's because my body has become too weak.'
I let out a small sigh and stroked my thin arms that could be felt under my pajamas.
My body was so bony under my pajamas that the thickness of my wrists and forearms was not that different.
'Can my body withstand the cold like this?'
When I was 7, after my mother passed away, I was tossed around by Andrea, suffering from a deepening sense of inferiority and helplessness day by day.
I could not take care of my own health, and no one truly cared for me or cared for me.
'I thought Andrea was taking good care of me, but I guess not.'
After my mother died, the Empress and Andrea's mother, Kavala, dismissed all of my courtiers.
Among them were my nanny and maids who had taken care of me since I was little.
The reason was that the court ladies who were influenced by my mother could also have a bad influence on me.
Kavala immediately recruited new maids to look after me and noble ladies of my age to be my companions, but naturally, there were no applicants.
Who would step forward to assist me, the daughter of the former Empress, while keeping an eye on Kavala, who has become the complete mistress of the palace?
I was young and weak.
'Even if there had been volunteers, Kavala and Andrea would have found fault and chased them away.'
Because he was planning to send his people to my palace to watch over me.
'You wish I would become weak and just die on my own.'
Thinking back now, I was really stupid.
Why didn't I think of that in my previous life and ruin myself the way they wanted and controlled me?
“Your Highness, the Princess!”
As I was walking around, resentful of the situation surrounding me, a maid from my palace found me. It seemed that she had realized I was missing and was looking for me.
“Where were you? I found you!”
"Why?"
“Well, you suddenly disappeared. Do you know how many people Your Highness made trouble for you?”
Then she tilted her head at the sight of Callius's outer garment draped over my shoulders.
“What are those clothes? Oh my, come to think of it, what are you wearing?”
Judging from her expression, it was clear that the maid still didn't know what was going on.
I guess they never imagined that I would go to the banquet hall dressed like this and thought I was just out for a walk at night alone.
I just talked around a bit.
“I just picked it up off the ground. I spilled a drink on my clothes.”
The maid frowned. Her face was astonished at having picked up the fallen clothes and put them on.
“If you go out like this without saying anything, it will be a problem for us. You make your clothes dirty like this. Why are you wearing clothes that have been thrown away? You look so dirty.”
The maid roughly grabbed my wrist and dragged me away, her voice sharp and irritated. Then, as if nothing had happened, she stabbed me in the chest with a knife.
“Go back quickly. What would you do if someone saw you? You’re not in your right mind. You should be ashamed.”
If it were me, I would have apologized to the maids for being a nuisance.
But I am different now.
“Let go.”
The maid looked back in surprise at my harsh voice, but that was it.
She shook her head, snorted, and muttered quietly, “What?”
It was clearly a soliloquy, but it was something I was telling people to listen to.
She must have thought that I, being psychologically intimidated, would be scared, pretend not to hear, and follow her.
What a rude, ill-mannered, and contemptuous attitude.
Andrea's maids never did me any serious physical harm.
'It's just that they've been secretly harassing each other in such a way that no one but the person involved can notice.'
Of course, that doesn't mean it's any less bad. Sometimes, a knife stabbed with words can be more painful.
A grudge welled up inside me.
I called out to the maid, who pulled my wrist roughly with a deliberately worried expression.
“It’s over there.”
“Why again?”
The maid glanced at me with displeasure.
One of her cheeks was slightly swollen.
“You took a vacation the day before yesterday because of a toothache, right?”
The maids would often treat me like I was invisible and talk about their stories, so even though I didn't like it, I was pretty well aware of their circumstances.
“But?”
“Did the treatment go well? Did you have the tooth pulled?”
“Why do you ask that?”
I whispered to her, as if I couldn't stand how worried I was about her.
“I heard somewhere that you shouldn’t eat undercooked seafood after having a tooth pulled and before your gums heal.”
The maid, who had been looking at me strangely, showed interest by rubbing my cheek.
"Why?"
“A person was in pain after eating undercooked seafood, and when I looked into it, I saw that his gums...”
I told the maid in detail all the disgusting and scary ghost stories I knew.
Then the maid's face turned pale.
“That, that kind of...!”
I continued speaking gloomily, as if I was very worried.
“That’s another story, some people have such a bad toothache that they go to the doctor, but, well...”
“Well, well, what is it?”
“The wisdom teeth are all the way from the roof of his mouth to his throat...”
As I continued my rambling, the maid swallowed dry saliva and turned her head away with a pale face.
“Stop it! Stop it and go to the bedroom.”
“I’m sorry. But it’s better to know than not to know, as a preventive measure. And I also heard something...”
The maid couldn't shut my mouth.
Even if she gave me a hint and treated me rudely, she couldn't shut my mouth when I was talking nonsense.
“Ouch! Stop it! It’s gross!”
She eventually let go of my wrist and covered her ears.
'Try to have a nightmare tonight.'
I sat right next to her and kept telling her all sorts of disgusting things.
And when I went to my quarters, I made up stories to the other maids about all sorts of painful and contagious diseases.
It didn't take long for the maid who pulled this out to become the object of shunning among the other maids.
'For commoners, getting sick is a pretty scary disease. It costs a lot of money, so they can't get proper treatment.'
I heard that among commoners, many people die because they cannot eat due to difficulty in even treating simple cavities.
“Everyone, be careful. It can be transmitted just by breathing.”
"Oh my god..."
The maids kept their distance and glanced at the maid who had pulled out her teeth.
The maid who pulled it out cried out in frustration.
“No! I just have a cavity...!”
Another maid asked cautiously.
“Hey, can you cover your mouth and speak?”
“Yeah. It can’t hurt if we take care of each other.”
I nodded with a look of pity on my face.
“What should I do... But that’s true. It can’t hurt to be careful. You never know.”
"Ah...!"
I shrugged my shoulders as I looked at the terrified faces of the maids.
The maid who pulled the tooth glared at me resentfully.
It was so different from my past life.
Why didn't I do this before?
What was I so afraid of that I kept checking everyone's reactions and censoring myself again and again?
All I got was these resentful stares, so why did I live in fear of them and cower?
'It's quite... fun, being able to do whatever you want without worrying about being hated.'
I stood facing the sword, smiling playfully.
My friend, who looks like a young boy who only comes to my heart.
I knew full well that he would never grow from this appearance.
He didn't grow up while I was growing up.
And I know he'll still be like this in 10 years.
'Karl never told me why it wasn't growing. Not until the day I died.'
In my past life, I often thought of Callius.
I happened to see him from a distance on the day I married Viscount Pelsus at the palace.
When the golden eyes that seemed to contain sunlight looked at me in my wedding dress, I was startled.
'I thought it was a knife for a moment.'
He was a man who looked very much like Karl.
If Karl were to grow, wouldn't he be exactly that person's face?
He caught my eye right away because of his striking resemblance to my close friend Karl, and he was etched into my mind.
That day was the first and last time I saw him.
After that, whenever I saw Karl, who appeared next to me without anyone noticing, I thought of him.
If I could go back in time, I would have liked to have seen Callius up close and in detail.
The more I felt Karl was precious, the more strangely curious I became about Callius.
But then I really did go back to the past, and as soon as I realized that, funny enough, the first thought that came to my mind was that I would be able to see Callius again.
Plus, the really cool idea that through him, I can create situations that Andrea most likely doesn't want.
“Huh huh...”
Karl looked up at me with wide eyes, smiling like a villain.
"What?"
"What?"
“That smile. Something feels different than usual.”
It was a face that felt unfamiliar to me.
I shrugged my shoulders, shaking my head.
"Yes?"
“It’s strange. You’ve been acting like a different person these past few days.”
“So, you don’t like it?”
Karl grinned.
“No, I like it very much.”
I smiled broadly at Karl's words.
"Thank you."
At that moment, a noise was heard from somewhere.
I looked back at Karl, thinking I would tell him to hide before they found out.
Luckily, Karl hid himself like a ghost before I could say anything.
'It's not that fast.'
I headed to my palace, trusting that Karl would reappear in a safe place as he always did.
As I approached my palace, which was filled only with Andrea's guards, my steps became heavier.
I walked down the hallway, dragging my feet.
The corridors, with their ornate roofs and decorative railings, were only sheltered from rain and sunlight, and were very windy.
I buttoned up my collar and grumbled to myself.
'If it's this cold in late summer, what on earth are we going to do in winter?'
In fact, the place where the palace is located is in the southernmost part of the empire, so it's relatively warm. It's just that I feel particularly cold.
'It's because my body has become too weak.'
I let out a small sigh and stroked my thin arms that could be felt under my pajamas.
My body was so bony under my pajamas that the thickness of my wrists and forearms was not that different.
'Can my body withstand the cold like this?'
When I was 7, after my mother passed away, I was tossed around by Andrea, suffering from a deepening sense of inferiority and helplessness day by day.
I could not take care of my own health, and no one truly cared for me or cared for me.
'I thought Andrea was taking good care of me, but I guess not.'
After my mother died, the Empress and Andrea's mother, Kavala, dismissed all of my courtiers.
Among them were my nanny and maids who had taken care of me since I was little.
The reason was that the court ladies who were influenced by my mother could also have a bad influence on me.
Kavala immediately recruited new maids to look after me and noble ladies of my age to be my companions, but naturally, there were no applicants.
Who would step forward to assist me, the daughter of the former Empress, while keeping an eye on Kavala, who has become the complete mistress of the palace?
I was young and weak.
'Even if there had been volunteers, Kavala and Andrea would have found fault and chased them away.'
Because he was planning to send his people to my palace to watch over me.
'You wish I would become weak and just die on my own.'
Thinking back now, I was really stupid.
Why didn't I think of that in my previous life and ruin myself the way they wanted and controlled me?
“Your Highness, the Princess!”
As I was walking around, resentful of the situation surrounding me, a maid from my palace found me. It seemed that she had realized I was missing and was looking for me.
“Where were you? I found you!”
"Why?"
“Well, you suddenly disappeared. Do you know how many people Your Highness made trouble for you?”
Then she tilted her head at the sight of Callius's outer garment draped over my shoulders.
“What are those clothes? Oh my, come to think of it, what are you wearing?”
Judging from her expression, it was clear that the maid still didn't know what was going on.
I guess they never imagined that I would go to the banquet hall dressed like this and thought I was just out for a walk at night alone.
I just talked around a bit.
“I just picked it up off the ground. I spilled a drink on my clothes.”
The maid frowned. Her face was astonished at having picked up the fallen clothes and put them on.
“If you go out like this without saying anything, it will be a problem for us. You make your clothes dirty like this. Why are you wearing clothes that have been thrown away? You look so dirty.”
The maid roughly grabbed my wrist and dragged me away, her voice sharp and irritated. Then, as if nothing had happened, she stabbed me in the chest with a knife.
“Go back quickly. What would you do if someone saw you? You’re not in your right mind. You should be ashamed.”
If it were me, I would have apologized to the maids for being a nuisance.
But I am different now.
“Let go.”
The maid looked back in surprise at my harsh voice, but that was it.
She shook her head, snorted, and muttered quietly, “What?”
It was clearly a soliloquy, but it was something I was telling people to listen to.
She must have thought that I, being psychologically intimidated, would be scared, pretend not to hear, and follow her.
What a rude, ill-mannered, and contemptuous attitude.
Andrea's maids never did me any serious physical harm.
'It's just that they've been secretly harassing each other in such a way that no one but the person involved can notice.'
Of course, that doesn't mean it's any less bad. Sometimes, a knife stabbed with words can be more painful.
A grudge welled up inside me.
I called out to the maid, who pulled my wrist roughly with a deliberately worried expression.
“It’s over there.”
“Why again?”
The maid glanced at me with displeasure.
One of her cheeks was slightly swollen.
“You took a vacation the day before yesterday because of a toothache, right?”
The maids would often treat me like I was invisible and talk about their stories, so even though I didn't like it, I was pretty well aware of their circumstances.
“But?”
“Did the treatment go well? Did you have the tooth pulled?”
“Why do you ask that?”
I whispered to her, as if I couldn't stand how worried I was about her.
“I heard somewhere that you shouldn’t eat undercooked seafood after having a tooth pulled and before your gums heal.”
The maid, who had been looking at me strangely, showed interest by rubbing my cheek.
"Why?"
“A person was in pain after eating undercooked seafood, and when I looked into it, I saw that his gums...”
I told the maid in detail all the disgusting and scary ghost stories I knew.
Then the maid's face turned pale.
“That, that kind of...!”
I continued speaking gloomily, as if I was very worried.
“That’s another story, some people have such a bad toothache that they go to the doctor, but, well...”
“Well, well, what is it?”
“The wisdom teeth are all the way from the roof of his mouth to his throat...”
As I continued my rambling, the maid swallowed dry saliva and turned her head away with a pale face.
“Stop it! Stop it and go to the bedroom.”
“I’m sorry. But it’s better to know than not to know, as a preventive measure. And I also heard something...”
The maid couldn't shut my mouth.
Even if she gave me a hint and treated me rudely, she couldn't shut my mouth when I was talking nonsense.
“Ouch! Stop it! It’s gross!”
She eventually let go of my wrist and covered her ears.
'Try to have a nightmare tonight.'
I sat right next to her and kept telling her all sorts of disgusting things.
And when I went to my quarters, I made up stories to the other maids about all sorts of painful and contagious diseases.
It didn't take long for the maid who pulled this out to become the object of shunning among the other maids.
'For commoners, getting sick is a pretty scary disease. It costs a lot of money, so they can't get proper treatment.'
I heard that among commoners, many people die because they cannot eat due to difficulty in even treating simple cavities.
“Everyone, be careful. It can be transmitted just by breathing.”
"Oh my god..."
The maids kept their distance and glanced at the maid who had pulled out her teeth.
The maid who pulled it out cried out in frustration.
“No! I just have a cavity...!”
Another maid asked cautiously.
“Hey, can you cover your mouth and speak?”
“Yeah. It can’t hurt if we take care of each other.”
I nodded with a look of pity on my face.
“What should I do... But that’s true. It can’t hurt to be careful. You never know.”
"Ah...!"
I shrugged my shoulders as I looked at the terrified faces of the maids.
The maid who pulled the tooth glared at me resentfully.
It was so different from my past life.
Why didn't I do this before?
What was I so afraid of that I kept checking everyone's reactions and censoring myself again and again?
All I got was these resentful stares, so why did I live in fear of them and cower?
'It's quite... fun, being able to do whatever you want without worrying about being hated.'
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