088. Strange Excuses
"Ha!"
Emilia sighed.
Her brother didn't lie in the letter. He just exposed the bleak reality of the Bern family in a very blatant way.
Beginning with the story of Charlotte, the letter also contained a detailed account of her mother's warning from the doctor that she must quit her job at the factory immediately, as well as reflections on his own foolishness.
The latter part was even more poignant.
The story was full of stories about His Majesty the King cutting off the annual allowance after a year, the difficult circumstances, and the poor girl who couldn't work or even date like ordinary women because she was taking bride training.
As expected from an executive in charge of the Purge Corps' propaganda and public relations, Mitch Bern's writing skills were jaw-dropping.
When Emilia put the letter down from her hands, her face felt hot and she couldn't raise her head.
“Don’t blame your brother. I don’t know what you think, but I was very touched.”
Nathan grinned, draping his arms over the back of the bench. The cool breeze ruffled his thin, soft brown hair, making him look like a mischievous child.
“They say you can tell a lot about a person by their writing. Your brother will definitely become a great writer. I really want to meet him and see what kind of person he is.”
Emilia swallowed. The compliments she received for her brother made her heart feel happy, but it was not pleasant at all. Her stomach began to churn with worry and anxiety again.
“I understand now. How you’ve lived for the past five years, and why you can’t just leave for the New World.”
Emilia's heart became wet like water-soaked cotton in front of those affectionate eyes. On the other hand, she felt sorry.
Hardius is probably watching that guy.
She broke into a cold sweat as she recalled her own reckless words and actions, such as mentioning 'Romeo and Juliet' to provoke Hardius.
Isn't that a terrible deception?
“You are the most independent and self-reliant person I have ever met. That is probably why Sheila Cavendish bullied you so childishly. Independent women are often criticized in the world.”
The cold analysis and logical conclusion once again made Emilia's heart ache.
“But Emilia, too much is worse than too little. I don’t think you need to be so stubborn and build walls. No one in the world can live alone without the help of others. There’s nothing wrong with asking someone for help.”
Emilia was a little shocked.
You're saying I set the date and built a wall? Me?
“I’m not blaming or criticizing you. I was also drawn to your strength.”
The gentle eyes suddenly took on a dark color and gave off a strange vibe.
An alarm bell rang in Emilia's head. Cold, silver-grey eyes began to fill her head.
Nathan suddenly took on a stern expression, not knowing whether he knew Emilia or not.
“Let me help you. How can I pretend not to know when I even received a letter like this? I thought about going to the Meyer family. Whether it’s Prince or Duchess Meyer, if we meet them in person and talk, maybe we can come up with a solution...”
Her heart sank. Emilia pressed her trembling hands to her chest.
“Or you can have an audience with His Majesty the King. I don’t know about others, but His Majesty must not ignore you. The world knows that he used you and Meyer for political purposes.”
Emilia barely managed to hold back the moans that threatened to burst out.
The small spark thrown by Mitch Bern was on the verge of turning into a huge fire.
“No, my lord, I have something to tell you. My engagement is not that simple.”
Nathan didn't even pretend to listen.
“Why did you endure it so much? Even if His Majesty the King had no choice... Hardius Meyer wasn’t like that. I think the two of you were talking at the ball that day.”
Every time Nathan's name came out of his mouth, Emilia felt her heart break.
“Well, I’ve heard that he’s a mean and cunning fox. He probably pretends to be gentle on the outside, but treats you rudely behind your back.”
“No, that’s not true. Absolutely not.”
Emilia, who was shaking her head vigorously, was shocked for a moment. She thought she had just thoughtlessly said those words to calm Nathan down, but they came back to her like a boomerang, stabbing her heart painfully.
“He... isn’t... that bad of a person.”
Emilia felt ridiculous for saying such a thing.
Just a few days ago, weren't you sharpening your knife inwardly, thinking the exact same thing as Nathan?
Unlike her dazed head, her mouth continued to move on its own.
“He is very worried about me. He has been discussing my future with His Majesty the King after the breakup. Thanks to this, His Majesty has taken an interest in me and my family again, and I think he will soon help me in some way. My brother had no idea about it because the breakup was so secret and was decided so recently.”
Nathan's eyes widened in surprise. He lowered his arms from the armrests and stared straight at Emilia.
“The problems my family and I are experiencing will be resolved soon. I know why you came to me, Master, but... interfering in this way will only complicate matters.”
She believed that Nathan, being a reasonable man, would be completely convinced. However, his reaction was completely unexpected.
“Then there’s no problem.”
"Yes?"
“If it’s as you say, you’ll soon break off the engagement, and your family problems will be resolved. Then isn’t it okay now?”
Confusion appeared on Emilia's face.
“I mean, come with me to the New World.”
Her eyes widened.
“Oh, no. I can’t.”
“You said no?”
Nathan frowned.
Emilia seemed to know why he did that. There was a subtle difference between 'no' and 'no', and there was no way that a sensitive man wouldn't notice.
As expected, Nathan looked at her with a slightly different look in his eyes than before.
“Is there any other reason why you can’t leave with me?”
Emilia suddenly felt a surge of revulsion rising before his piercing gaze. She held back the urge to shut her mouth and continued speaking with difficulty.
“No, there’s nothing like that. There’s no problem...”
“Emilia.”
Strangely, his voice sounded so distant. Emilia tried to come to her senses, licking her dry lips with her tongue.
“I’m sorry, my lord, but I think I must go now.”
Emilia put strength into her trembling legs and sat up.
“I’ll tell you again, I’m not going to the New World. There’s no other reason. It’s just... I don’t want to go to such a faraway and dangerous place. I’m really sorry that my brother sent you a letter like that. But... I hope you won’t pay any more attention to me. If you keep doing this, I think I’ll lose my gratitude.”
As she blurted out the words, her heart ached, and tears began to well up in her eyes. Emilia swallowed her guilt and regret and bowed her head.
“Then goodbye.”
The hem of the dress drew a decisive concentric circle. Just before she turned around completely, she noticed that his shining green eyes had suddenly darkened. Emilia had no choice but to close her eyes tightly.
Kaitlyn felt a sense of emotion. Enria felt the same way.
The two were like unfortunate lovers who had to part ways due to royal command. They were robbed of countless hours in which they could have developed feelings for each other and built memories.
Ahem, Kaitlyn cleared her throat and winked at Enria first.
“Oh, by the way, weren’t you going to show me the newly decorated tapestry room?”
Enria also noticed immediately and got up.
“Oh, really? I forgot.”
Enria immediately looked back at the young man and woman.
“We’ll go away for a bit. Let’s have a nice chat, just the two of you.”
The two women quickly disappeared from the reception room. The door closed, and silence fell.
Bianca had been leading the conversation and setting the mood until just a moment ago. But now, she felt herself rapidly becoming speechless and awkward.
Her gaze wandered over the man's shoulder and then back to the teacup. Just before she blushed, Hardius spoke first.
“It must be a different feeling to be back home after a year. I heard that Young Lady is doing very well in school.”
“Huh? Yes, ah...”
“The Dean of Bruges, Lord Neuschwann, used to come to our family dinner every year. He was full of praise for the Young Lady.”
Bianca stared at Hardius with a blank expression. Then, something unexpected came out of her mouth.
“What are you doing now?”
Hardius showed no sign of agitation. He simply stared at his former fiancée with a terribly calm expression.
“Why are you talking like that again? It’s so awkward!”
“Are you uncomfortable?”
“Yes, stop it.”
Hardius blinked once and immediately replied, “Yes, I got it.” Bianca let out a sigh at his attitude, which changed as if he was turning over his hand.
“Yeah, you were like that originally. I completely forgot what kind of person you were.”
She grumbled and brought the teacup to her lips. She swallowed the cold water, trying to calm her trembling stomach.
It was the same as when she was a child.
Bianca threatened to hit the child who insisted on using honorifics, saying, "Lady Leichnen," if he didn't call her Vicky, and Hardius replied that he understood with his indifferent eyes as he did now. However, when they met again a few days later, they began speaking honorifically.
It was then that Bianca realized.
The fact that not care at all about titles, speech, and actions is evidence of indifference toward oneself.
“Let’s say hello again. It’s nice to finally meet you. Nice to meet you, Hardy.”
Bianca, who had boldly called him by his nickname, waited for him to call her 'Vicky' in return. However, Hardius just stared blankly at Bianca with an unreadable look in his eyes.
“How come nothing has changed? It’s so blunt and boring.”
The corners of the man's mouth slightly twisted upward.
What kind of face would you make, Hardy, if I confessed that even that crooked smile makes my heart flutter?
Bianca felt annoyed for no reason and got up from her seat.
“Do you want to go for a walk?”
Instead of answering, Hardius straightened his long body. Bianca put her hand on the man's forearm as if nothing had happened.
Of course, she regretted it right away.
It wasn't just his height that had grown so much. The muscles that were firmly held under his hands made Bianca suffocate.
Bianca followed him, calming her flustered mind.
Halfway from the living room to the garden, their reflections appeared in a large mirror. Bianca lifted her chin as if to show off.
As she lost weight, she heard over and over again that she was beautiful and pretty. Only God knows how hard it was to get to that point.
The last five years have not been pleasant at all. The convent of Bruges has been an inhumanly harsh and strict place.
The only thing that gave her the motivation to survive in such a place and transform into a swan was that man.
Hardy did everything he could to break off the engagement. He had to go into battle, get the mines, and negotiate with the Serpent King. That fact always brought Bianca relief.
“I know you’ve had a hard time.”
Hardius glanced at the words that came out of nowhere.
“How hard you tried to break off the engagement.”
There was an entity that naturally came to mind when she heard the word 'broken engagement'.
Whenever the subject of the child came up, Bianca tried hard to appear aloof.
What would your face be like if you found out that I was obsessed with extreme jealousy towards a woman whose face I didn't even know?
Bianca wrinkled her nose, her twisted heart crumpling.
If you think about it, their relationship was nothing special except that they were engaged. They visited each other's homes several times a month, but they were always accompanied by adults. They never played together or were left alone, except when they played chess.
This means that there is no reason for Hardius Meyer to give his heart to his fiancée.
Even back then, didn't you hear people say you were fat and weird?
So, there is no need to be upset. There is no need to be impatient. The relationship can be built from now on.
“Don’t worry about the banquet. I feel better if you don’t come. Instead, let’s meet secretly like this. Like tragic lovers.”
Bianca giggled.
“Let’s meet across the chessboard next time.”
Bianca said that and took her hand away from him. She continued walking lightly, but it felt like she was stepping on mud. With each step she took, something unpleasant clung to her. Bianca had no idea what it was.
The walk was disappointingly short. As soon as they left the entrance, Hardius said goodbye to Bianca. Bianca tried not to look at the bright sun that had just crossed the threshold of noon.
“Then take care.”
Bianca greeted him friendly, and Hardius responded with a proper bow before a Grand Duchess.
As he came out of the garden and headed for the entrance, the coachman noticed him and came running out.
“Are you finished?”
"Yes."
The coachman felt a chill run down his spine in front of his master's expressionless face, as if he were wearing a mask.
“Then, I will take you to Basilion House.”
Soon, the carriage set off.
Hardius, sitting with his legs crossed, had thoughts of three women: his mother, Bianca, and Enria Leichnen.
They got along very well. The conversation flowed naturally, and no one seemed uncomfortable.
But he felt uncomfortable the whole time, as if he had swallowed sand. He couldn't concentrate on the conversation at all, and his consciousness just floated in the air.
If he thinks about it, it's always been like that.
The daily routine of the social world represented by salons and clubhouses did not interest Hardius at all. The only times when his heart was ablaze were the formal banquets held once a year or the ball in Luen.
Suddenly, Emilia came to mind.
Yes, maybe this unbearable boredom is ultimately because you are not here. That is why I wanted to drag you into my world so badly...
Hardius loosened his tie. At one point, as he absentmindedly followed the trees passing by outside the window, he reached out and rang the carriage bell. The coachman, who had stopped his horse, came running in, panting.
“I must turn the carriage around. To the Palazzo Riccardi.”
“Yes? Right now?”
Hardius nodded.
The coachman blinked in surprise, then quickly grabbed the reins again. The carriage turned and started off powerfully toward Palazzo Riccardi.
"Ha!"
Emilia sighed.
Her brother didn't lie in the letter. He just exposed the bleak reality of the Bern family in a very blatant way.
Beginning with the story of Charlotte, the letter also contained a detailed account of her mother's warning from the doctor that she must quit her job at the factory immediately, as well as reflections on his own foolishness.
The latter part was even more poignant.
The story was full of stories about His Majesty the King cutting off the annual allowance after a year, the difficult circumstances, and the poor girl who couldn't work or even date like ordinary women because she was taking bride training.
As expected from an executive in charge of the Purge Corps' propaganda and public relations, Mitch Bern's writing skills were jaw-dropping.
When Emilia put the letter down from her hands, her face felt hot and she couldn't raise her head.
“Don’t blame your brother. I don’t know what you think, but I was very touched.”
Nathan grinned, draping his arms over the back of the bench. The cool breeze ruffled his thin, soft brown hair, making him look like a mischievous child.
“They say you can tell a lot about a person by their writing. Your brother will definitely become a great writer. I really want to meet him and see what kind of person he is.”
Emilia swallowed. The compliments she received for her brother made her heart feel happy, but it was not pleasant at all. Her stomach began to churn with worry and anxiety again.
“I understand now. How you’ve lived for the past five years, and why you can’t just leave for the New World.”
Emilia's heart became wet like water-soaked cotton in front of those affectionate eyes. On the other hand, she felt sorry.
Hardius is probably watching that guy.
She broke into a cold sweat as she recalled her own reckless words and actions, such as mentioning 'Romeo and Juliet' to provoke Hardius.
Isn't that a terrible deception?
“You are the most independent and self-reliant person I have ever met. That is probably why Sheila Cavendish bullied you so childishly. Independent women are often criticized in the world.”
The cold analysis and logical conclusion once again made Emilia's heart ache.
“But Emilia, too much is worse than too little. I don’t think you need to be so stubborn and build walls. No one in the world can live alone without the help of others. There’s nothing wrong with asking someone for help.”
Emilia was a little shocked.
You're saying I set the date and built a wall? Me?
“I’m not blaming or criticizing you. I was also drawn to your strength.”
The gentle eyes suddenly took on a dark color and gave off a strange vibe.
An alarm bell rang in Emilia's head. Cold, silver-grey eyes began to fill her head.
Nathan suddenly took on a stern expression, not knowing whether he knew Emilia or not.
“Let me help you. How can I pretend not to know when I even received a letter like this? I thought about going to the Meyer family. Whether it’s Prince or Duchess Meyer, if we meet them in person and talk, maybe we can come up with a solution...”
Her heart sank. Emilia pressed her trembling hands to her chest.
“Or you can have an audience with His Majesty the King. I don’t know about others, but His Majesty must not ignore you. The world knows that he used you and Meyer for political purposes.”
Emilia barely managed to hold back the moans that threatened to burst out.
The small spark thrown by Mitch Bern was on the verge of turning into a huge fire.
“No, my lord, I have something to tell you. My engagement is not that simple.”
Nathan didn't even pretend to listen.
“Why did you endure it so much? Even if His Majesty the King had no choice... Hardius Meyer wasn’t like that. I think the two of you were talking at the ball that day.”
Every time Nathan's name came out of his mouth, Emilia felt her heart break.
“Well, I’ve heard that he’s a mean and cunning fox. He probably pretends to be gentle on the outside, but treats you rudely behind your back.”
“No, that’s not true. Absolutely not.”
Emilia, who was shaking her head vigorously, was shocked for a moment. She thought she had just thoughtlessly said those words to calm Nathan down, but they came back to her like a boomerang, stabbing her heart painfully.
“He... isn’t... that bad of a person.”
Emilia felt ridiculous for saying such a thing.
Just a few days ago, weren't you sharpening your knife inwardly, thinking the exact same thing as Nathan?
Unlike her dazed head, her mouth continued to move on its own.
“He is very worried about me. He has been discussing my future with His Majesty the King after the breakup. Thanks to this, His Majesty has taken an interest in me and my family again, and I think he will soon help me in some way. My brother had no idea about it because the breakup was so secret and was decided so recently.”
Nathan's eyes widened in surprise. He lowered his arms from the armrests and stared straight at Emilia.
“The problems my family and I are experiencing will be resolved soon. I know why you came to me, Master, but... interfering in this way will only complicate matters.”
She believed that Nathan, being a reasonable man, would be completely convinced. However, his reaction was completely unexpected.
“Then there’s no problem.”
"Yes?"
“If it’s as you say, you’ll soon break off the engagement, and your family problems will be resolved. Then isn’t it okay now?”
Confusion appeared on Emilia's face.
“I mean, come with me to the New World.”
Her eyes widened.
“Oh, no. I can’t.”
“You said no?”
Nathan frowned.
Emilia seemed to know why he did that. There was a subtle difference between 'no' and 'no', and there was no way that a sensitive man wouldn't notice.
As expected, Nathan looked at her with a slightly different look in his eyes than before.
“Is there any other reason why you can’t leave with me?”
Emilia suddenly felt a surge of revulsion rising before his piercing gaze. She held back the urge to shut her mouth and continued speaking with difficulty.
“No, there’s nothing like that. There’s no problem...”
“Emilia.”
Strangely, his voice sounded so distant. Emilia tried to come to her senses, licking her dry lips with her tongue.
“I’m sorry, my lord, but I think I must go now.”
Emilia put strength into her trembling legs and sat up.
“I’ll tell you again, I’m not going to the New World. There’s no other reason. It’s just... I don’t want to go to such a faraway and dangerous place. I’m really sorry that my brother sent you a letter like that. But... I hope you won’t pay any more attention to me. If you keep doing this, I think I’ll lose my gratitude.”
As she blurted out the words, her heart ached, and tears began to well up in her eyes. Emilia swallowed her guilt and regret and bowed her head.
“Then goodbye.”
The hem of the dress drew a decisive concentric circle. Just before she turned around completely, she noticed that his shining green eyes had suddenly darkened. Emilia had no choice but to close her eyes tightly.
***
Kaitlyn felt a sense of emotion. Enria felt the same way.
The two were like unfortunate lovers who had to part ways due to royal command. They were robbed of countless hours in which they could have developed feelings for each other and built memories.
Ahem, Kaitlyn cleared her throat and winked at Enria first.
“Oh, by the way, weren’t you going to show me the newly decorated tapestry room?”
Enria also noticed immediately and got up.
“Oh, really? I forgot.”
Enria immediately looked back at the young man and woman.
“We’ll go away for a bit. Let’s have a nice chat, just the two of you.”
The two women quickly disappeared from the reception room. The door closed, and silence fell.
Bianca had been leading the conversation and setting the mood until just a moment ago. But now, she felt herself rapidly becoming speechless and awkward.
Her gaze wandered over the man's shoulder and then back to the teacup. Just before she blushed, Hardius spoke first.
“It must be a different feeling to be back home after a year. I heard that Young Lady is doing very well in school.”
“Huh? Yes, ah...”
“The Dean of Bruges, Lord Neuschwann, used to come to our family dinner every year. He was full of praise for the Young Lady.”
Bianca stared at Hardius with a blank expression. Then, something unexpected came out of her mouth.
“What are you doing now?”
Hardius showed no sign of agitation. He simply stared at his former fiancée with a terribly calm expression.
“Why are you talking like that again? It’s so awkward!”
“Are you uncomfortable?”
“Yes, stop it.”
Hardius blinked once and immediately replied, “Yes, I got it.” Bianca let out a sigh at his attitude, which changed as if he was turning over his hand.
“Yeah, you were like that originally. I completely forgot what kind of person you were.”
She grumbled and brought the teacup to her lips. She swallowed the cold water, trying to calm her trembling stomach.
It was the same as when she was a child.
Bianca threatened to hit the child who insisted on using honorifics, saying, "Lady Leichnen," if he didn't call her Vicky, and Hardius replied that he understood with his indifferent eyes as he did now. However, when they met again a few days later, they began speaking honorifically.
It was then that Bianca realized.
The fact that not care at all about titles, speech, and actions is evidence of indifference toward oneself.
“Let’s say hello again. It’s nice to finally meet you. Nice to meet you, Hardy.”
Bianca, who had boldly called him by his nickname, waited for him to call her 'Vicky' in return. However, Hardius just stared blankly at Bianca with an unreadable look in his eyes.
“How come nothing has changed? It’s so blunt and boring.”
The corners of the man's mouth slightly twisted upward.
What kind of face would you make, Hardy, if I confessed that even that crooked smile makes my heart flutter?
Bianca felt annoyed for no reason and got up from her seat.
“Do you want to go for a walk?”
Instead of answering, Hardius straightened his long body. Bianca put her hand on the man's forearm as if nothing had happened.
Of course, she regretted it right away.
It wasn't just his height that had grown so much. The muscles that were firmly held under his hands made Bianca suffocate.
Bianca followed him, calming her flustered mind.
Halfway from the living room to the garden, their reflections appeared in a large mirror. Bianca lifted her chin as if to show off.
As she lost weight, she heard over and over again that she was beautiful and pretty. Only God knows how hard it was to get to that point.
The last five years have not been pleasant at all. The convent of Bruges has been an inhumanly harsh and strict place.
The only thing that gave her the motivation to survive in such a place and transform into a swan was that man.
Hardy did everything he could to break off the engagement. He had to go into battle, get the mines, and negotiate with the Serpent King. That fact always brought Bianca relief.
“I know you’ve had a hard time.”
Hardius glanced at the words that came out of nowhere.
“How hard you tried to break off the engagement.”
There was an entity that naturally came to mind when she heard the word 'broken engagement'.
Whenever the subject of the child came up, Bianca tried hard to appear aloof.
What would your face be like if you found out that I was obsessed with extreme jealousy towards a woman whose face I didn't even know?
Bianca wrinkled her nose, her twisted heart crumpling.
If you think about it, their relationship was nothing special except that they were engaged. They visited each other's homes several times a month, but they were always accompanied by adults. They never played together or were left alone, except when they played chess.
This means that there is no reason for Hardius Meyer to give his heart to his fiancée.
Even back then, didn't you hear people say you were fat and weird?
So, there is no need to be upset. There is no need to be impatient. The relationship can be built from now on.
“Don’t worry about the banquet. I feel better if you don’t come. Instead, let’s meet secretly like this. Like tragic lovers.”
Bianca giggled.
“Let’s meet across the chessboard next time.”
Bianca said that and took her hand away from him. She continued walking lightly, but it felt like she was stepping on mud. With each step she took, something unpleasant clung to her. Bianca had no idea what it was.
The walk was disappointingly short. As soon as they left the entrance, Hardius said goodbye to Bianca. Bianca tried not to look at the bright sun that had just crossed the threshold of noon.
“Then take care.”
Bianca greeted him friendly, and Hardius responded with a proper bow before a Grand Duchess.
As he came out of the garden and headed for the entrance, the coachman noticed him and came running out.
“Are you finished?”
"Yes."
The coachman felt a chill run down his spine in front of his master's expressionless face, as if he were wearing a mask.
“Then, I will take you to Basilion House.”
Soon, the carriage set off.
Hardius, sitting with his legs crossed, had thoughts of three women: his mother, Bianca, and Enria Leichnen.
They got along very well. The conversation flowed naturally, and no one seemed uncomfortable.
But he felt uncomfortable the whole time, as if he had swallowed sand. He couldn't concentrate on the conversation at all, and his consciousness just floated in the air.
If he thinks about it, it's always been like that.
The daily routine of the social world represented by salons and clubhouses did not interest Hardius at all. The only times when his heart was ablaze were the formal banquets held once a year or the ball in Luen.
Suddenly, Emilia came to mind.
Yes, maybe this unbearable boredom is ultimately because you are not here. That is why I wanted to drag you into my world so badly...
Hardius loosened his tie. At one point, as he absentmindedly followed the trees passing by outside the window, he reached out and rang the carriage bell. The coachman, who had stopped his horse, came running in, panting.
“I must turn the carriage around. To the Palazzo Riccardi.”
“Yes? Right now?”
Hardius nodded.
The coachman blinked in surprise, then quickly grabbed the reins again. The carriage turned and started off powerfully toward Palazzo Riccardi.
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