100m before I meet you (10)
It's too late.
I couldn't help but stand next to the sofa and bow my head. Ian entered the entrance of the barracks and stopped walking.
Even if I don't look up, I can feel the gaze. The tension made my forearm flabby.
"I'm sorry... Because cleaning was delayed... I'm going out now."
A heavy silence weighed heavily on my shoulders.
I wanted to get out of the barracks right away, but I couldn't because Ian was standing in front of the entrance.
His body odor tickles the tip of my nose. My mouth was dry, and my heart was pounding.
I wish Ian didn't recognize me. No, it must be.
But I want him to find out. I hope so.
What kind of mind is this? I couldn't understand my feelings either.
"Do you need anything?"
"..."
'Why don't you say anything?'
In the ensuing brief, I stood still with my head bowed.
I couldn't even breathe much. I felt like Ian's gaze was becoming a chain, entrapping my whole body
I don't think I'm surprised, but what the hell am I thinking? Do you suspect me of being a monster?
I put the back of my wounded hand forward and folded my hands so that I could see him clearly.
"Whoa..."
Only then did Ian sigh softly and take off his dirty leather gloves.
Should I take that or not? While I was thinking about it, he threw his glove on the table.
It means to clean up, right? As I awkwardly picked up his gloves, Ian spoke for the first time.
"Leave it alone."
I almost breathed a sigh of relief. He doesn't know, I think.
"Shouldn't I wash it?"
"I'll do it, so leave it alone."
I wanted to talk about this part anyway, but it went well.
"You don't have to clean up your clothes. Leave it on the floor and I'll clean it up."
"..."
"If you have any special food or tea, please let me know in advance. You can also take notes."
"Is it Hana?"
Yes? Didn't you know I was your maid?
"My name is Adina, and I've been serving you for a few days now."
"Adina."
"Yes..."
Somehow, Ian's eyes became piercingly sharp.
The cold expression, as if the ice is dripping, makes me feel a little intimidated. I said in a creepy voice.
"Well, if you don't have anything else to do, I'll go out first. Please rest."
"Hah..."
With a short sigh, he brushed his head.
Just as I was about to pass by him, he grabbed me by the forearm.
"What the hell."
"Yes, yes?"
"Are you sure you have to be hit in the ass to listen to me?"
"What, what do you mean?"
"A maid? What, Adina? That's a reversal of Nadia's name! Are you kidding me now? Millenia!"
"...!"
I was so surprised that I gasped for a moment. I was as hard as a piece of wood and managed to touch my lips.
"I thought it was me... Uh, how did you know? I was disguised..."
"Do you call that a disguise? I will take care of you!"
Ian raised his voice and squeezed his eyes shut as if trying to control his emotions.
And yet when he opened his eyes again, his golden eyes were fluttering with passion.
"How can I not know you?"
I've been running into the knights of the Eldern, including Beorn, for the past week, but none of them recognized me.
Only Ian recognized me. He didn't even look at my face properly.
I thought I was in perfect disguise, but I guess he wasn't.
'What should I do now?'
My head turned white, and I couldn't think of a solution. Ian pulled my arm in a panic.
"Where is the accommodation? Pack your bags right away."
"Why me?"
"There is a supply ship that arrived a little while ago. Take it to the rear and go home tomorrow morning."
"I don't like it."
I held on with my arms shaking, and Ian looked back at me with a terrified expression.
"Millennia!"
"I'm not going. I'll be here until the end of the Rift."
"Do you know that this is a children's playground? Please go back before I tell the Marquis."
I know I'm wrong. I don't mean to deny that.
But that's not what you say, is it?
"I know this is not a playground. I risked my life to get here."
"What?"
Ian's eyes changed for a moment. When I saw his face getting cold, my heart burned.
Ian forced my chin to turn away from my gaze.
"Perhaps... Were you on a supply ship that was threatened by a high-level monster a few days ago?"
"..."
"Oh my God, Millenia!'
I should have been careful with my words in front of this quick-witted man, but the problem was that I was unknowingly throbbing.
There was only one way to avoid being evicted. I grabbed Ian's finger.
"Why do you want to send me like that? I also help in my own way. I didn't hurt anyone."
"You're already hurting me!"
"What kind of damage did I do to you... I?"
Ian grabbed my shoulder with both hands. Fingers that couldn't control their strength dug into my shoulders.
"Why do you think I participated in the war? To protect the world? Because of the knight's sense of duty? No, it was just because of one person. I want to protect you?"
My face became ridiculously hot. Ian's words sounded like a confession to my ears.
"What kind of heart was I holding onto! What if you come here! What did you think when you came to the most dangerous place? Fearless!"
The boy's image was superimposed on Ian's angry figure in a suppressed voice like a silent flame.
The smell of sweat that I didn't hate, strangely, his body that was less mature than it is now, the words that were less than mine, and the voice that felt like a boy's greenness.
The boy who comforted me just by being with me grew up and became the person he is today.
Finally, the fact that I had only in my head came to reality.
'I found it.'
I finally found the boy who had comforted me, the man who had come to the land of hell and made a wish that could not be granted.
Please don't die
Did Ian love me in his past life? Maybe that's why he hugged me and trembled.
Also, did he not fulfill his love because he was a 'keeper'?
When I thought about it again, it didn't matter.
There was nothing more important than that at this moment.
I couldn't control my passion and hugged Ian.
"I missed you."
Ian was silent. I buried my face in the hardened man's chest and took a deep breath.
The faint smell of soap and light sweat.
During his stay in the Eldern, everyone in the containment area used Rahon's soap.
Everyone smelled similarly, but why did I only react to Ian's body odor?
From then on, I thought Ian was special without even realizing it.
"I miss you so much that I can't stand it. I couldn't sleep the whole time, but now that I'm here, I can barely sleep."
"Millenia..."
"Now that the Great Rift is over, you will return to your domain. So until then... Until then, let me stay by your side."
Ian's hand stopped in the air as he tried to hug me. He bit his lip and pushed me away.
"No. I can't. Go back."
"Coward..."
"Do you know that now? I'm a coward who is afraid that I will hurt your fingertips."
"I'm not hurt! I won't hurt a single hair!"
"I don't like it. You're here."
"..."
Ian replied firmly and turned away. As if he didn't want to talk anymore.
I glared at the back of his head and stood in his way. I raised my eyebrows disapprovingly, grabbed his shoulders, and lifted my heels.
"What... Ugh!"
Ian's eyes widened. His frozen golden eyes slowly began to tremble.
Only then did I let go of his lower lip, which I had been biting hard. I licked the slightly uneven surface and slipped my tongue between his.
"..."
Ian squeezed his eyes shut. At the same time, he held my arm in pain.
I'm going to be pushed out again.
I gasped as I thought about it, it was because Ian hugged me so that my heart sank.
My lips interlocked with each other. The hot flesh rushed into my mouth and wrapped around mine in one gulp.
I could feel all kinds of sweetness on the tip of my tongue. Ian wrapped his arm around my waist, which was staggering from my knees.
My hair tie was broken, so Ian carefully brushed the hair that was pouring down my back.
Suddenly, my eyes became hot.
A thirsty kiss, a gentle hand stroking my hair, and the trembling of my fingertips.
'I wish time stopped.'
Then, as if glimpsed into my head, Ian stopped all the action.
"Ian?"
Ian's face was white. Just like someone who has seen a scary scene.
'What are you watching?'
The next moment, something like dust floated between me and Ian.
"What is this..."
It was ashes.
It was my hair until a while ago.
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