Contrary to my expectations, the journey was smooth.
The night was as thick as tarry, but the morning dawned without anyone getting bloody, and they packed up their belongings and set out again before the sun went up.
Although the schedule was delayed little by little due to the soldiers who were tired of the sweltering heat, the pilgrimage went on without a major hitch.
Five days after leaving the palace, Gareth and his bodyguard arrived at the northwestern town of Sortica, where they spent the day before heading back north.
Meanwhile, I watched the attendants sent by Senevere with their eyes lit up.
They feigned an abominable loyalty, but I never let go of my suspicions about them.
They are just waiting for the right time. It was obvious that something terrible would happen soon.
Senevere's involvement was always accompanied by an ominous conspiracy.
If not today, then tomorrow, if not tomorrow, the next day... Soon, a horrible scene will unfold before our eyes.
I didn't know if I was afraid of it or expecting it.
When I saw Barcas, who had been so cold to me, so kind to Ayla, I hoped that the terrible devastation would happen right away.
I felt sorry for them if they were so horrible that I couldn't even recognize them. It was a hundred times better to see him standing beside Ayla, and to see his corpse.
However, as night fell, I was afraid that I would suffocate. I repeated hundreds of times that it didn't matter if a man like that died, but it was no use.
I, who had been trembling with anxiety all night, ran out of the barracks before daybreak. Then, relying on the dim light of dawn, I searched for him. It was only when I saw Barcas alive and breathing with my own eyes that I felt like I could breathe.
I hurriedly walked along a narrow, wooded path, only to stop when I heard the horse rustle.
As I made my way through the thick bushes, I saw a gray stallion with a black mane.
Barcas, who skillfully dragged the great horse to the fountain, sat down on one knee on the ground. Then he pulled the reins to induce the horse to bow to the surface of the water, and with his other hand, he scooped up the spring water and moistened the stallion's long, towering nape.
The sunlight penetrated through the lush foliage and colored his hair with a beautiful silver hue. I, who watched the scene with bated breath, closed my eyes in despair.
No matter how much I cut and cut out, my love for Barcas grew like a tumor and ate away at me. I couldn't see a way out of this quagmire.
How can I get rid of this feeling?
Leaning back against the beautiful tree, I, who was looking up at the sky in the distance, turned around helplessly. Then I spotted Ayla walking down the trail and hurriedly hid behind a tree.
As soon as she got out of bed, she was wearing only a gown over a thin dress, her long hair hanging over her shoulders. She looked as disheveled as I was, or even more disturbed than I was.
Nevertheless, Ayla looked noble and dignified. I thought that maybe there was something in her blood that I couldn't have even if I died soon.
"You were in a place like this."
Ayla, reddish heat on her cheeks, cautiously approached him and sat down on the flat rock.
Barcas's gaze fell on her. As if she couldn't stand the silent gaze, Ayla gently bent the corners of her eyes and carefully took off her shoes. Then she dipped her feet in the spring water and splashed the water lightly.
The sound of horses purring, the splashing of water, and cheerful laughter like birds chirping blended into the cold early morning air.
I resisted my desire to run out and grab my half-sister's hair, tore her lips off as she smiled at him, and resisted the urge to pull out her tongue that was chattering at him. I didn't want to see Barcas trying to protect Ayla, even if I died.
Eventually, Ayla, who had enjoyed the water to her satisfaction, reached out for him. Instead of grabbing her hand and lifting her up, Barcas bent down and wiped her feet. He put on her shoes carefully as if he were a loyal servant. The sight was like a dagger piercing my heart.
I turned around and started running. Branches and blades of grass scratched at my arms and calves, but I couldn't feel any pain. It was as if all my senses had failed.
I gasped for breath as I galloped like a racehorse through the winding woods. Then, I tripped over the roots of the tree and fell apart. Buried in the bushes, my heart pounded, and I suddenly burst out laughing.
What would Senevere say when she saw this? She would probably frown and shake her head. I could hear her sneering voice from somewhere.
"There are two paths for you. One is to get the man you want by any means necessary, and the other is to be a less miserable loser."
She seemed to want me to seduce him, but I could not be like Senevere even if I died soon.
I would have achieved what I wanted by any means necessary. But I didn't know what to do but pray for the painful time to end as soon as possible.
I looked up at the shattered sky through the branches, and then I straightened myself to my feet. As I walked through the dark forest road with tired steps, I saw a few knights running back and forth. As I walked past them and approached the front of the carriage, a guard knight who was wondering if it was Lubon or something quickly stopped me.
"Where on earth did you go without saying a word? You can't go alone without an escort..."
The knight, who was pouring out a cheeky nagging voice, suddenly stopped talking. He seemed quite surprised by my messiness.
"What the hell... That's what it looks like... Where did you get Impeached?"
I passed him and stepped onto the carriage footstool.
But the man didn't seem to want to stop nagging. He grabbed the doorpost and continued in a firm tone.
"I must protect Your Highness, so..."
"I think someone really cares about me."
I looked down at him with a sneer.
"It seems that you were instructed by the Empress not to take your eyes off me even for a moment... If you're going to keep an eye on me, you have to keep your mind straight. Why do you blame me for missing out on you?"
The man shuts his mouth, speechless.
I slammed the door shut in front of him.
A man with his fingers stuck in the crack of the door spat out a harsh curse. He was wearing a gauntlet and didn't seem to be seriously injured, but he felt a lot of pain, and a gurgling sound continued for a long time.
I ignored all the complaints from the outside, as I always do.
If I had listened to everything that the people around me were saying, I would have gone crazy long ago.
After becoming a Princess, the first thing I learned was how to listen.
I curled up like a hedgehog with a thick curtain over the window where the morning dawn came in.
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