He held his wife with a heart full of resentment that only grew without any resolution.
Even Kishian himself didn't know how to handle his feelings, so he just expressed them so violently.
But no matter how hard he pressed, he couldn't hear what he wanted from the Grand Duchess.
I'm really sorry. I ask for your forgiveness, and I still want you, so please stay by my side...
Even though that was all she had to say, the Grand Duchess simply kept her mouth shut.
Like someone who believes that if they just endure silently, the pain will eventually pass.
And holding such a woman gave Kishian a terrible feeling.
The image of her crying silently while holding him was etched into his mind like a knife, and it was not easily erased.
He was trying to focus on something else and was currently directly supervising the soldiers' training, but it didn't catch his eye.
He just pretended to look after the soldiers and sat in the training ground, lost in thought.
What brought him back to his senses from his trance was Anne's voice, heard out of nowhere.
"Your Highness, the Grand Duchess has asked me for a favor."
Archduchess. Please. That alone was enough to bring him back to his senses.
It was the story of a woman who had been crying and enduring as if she had nothing to ask for, but now had something to ask for the first time.
The golden eyes that had been lost in thought regained their clarity and stared at Anne.
"What do she want?"
"Two days later, she said she wanted to go out for a bit in the morning."
"Outing?"
His nerves were on edge.
The last time he saw her, the Grand Duchess had told him to throw her out.
If you want Letie, then take her instead.
She said something that didn't even sound like it.
'You don't have any intention of solving the complicated situation, you just think about running away...'
It was unusual for the Grand Duchess, who had wanted to run away so badly, to suddenly ask permission to go out.
He shook his head, feeling a prickling sense of unease stabbing his insides.
"Not allowed."
"Yes?"
"I don't know why she suddenly wants to go out. If she feels suffocated, she can just take a walk in the garden, and if she needs anything, I can get it for her, so why does she have to go out?"
"... Her Highness has been looking tired lately. A walk in the garden... might not be enough. I think she should go out, meet people, and see nice places to feel better..."
"I told you not to allow it. I don't want to talk about it anymore, so tell the Grand Duchess that."
After saying that, Kishian turned his gaze back to the soldiers.
It was a clear refusal to hear any more.
Normally, Anne would have given up and backed down at that point.
But this time, she opened her mouth again, hesitating but not leaving.
"But, Your Highness, as you know. Her Highness is quite different from usual."
"..."
"I hear sobbing coming from inside the room. Not only does she not eat properly, but she also avoids the maids and does not pay attention to them."
"..."
"It's never been like this before... I'm so worried. I'm worried that something bigger might happen if this continues."
The thought that something bigger might happen caught Kishian's ears again.
A big thing that can happen to someone who is extremely depressed.
As soon as the thought of what it was came to mind, his mind went blank.
"The condition is that bad? I'll go check her out now..."
"No! I don't think that would be good. I feel like Her Highness is afraid of meeting Your Highness the Grand Duke..."
It was a fact that even Kishian knew without having to hear it through the maid's mouth.
The Grand Duchess wants to avoid him.
Anne took advantage of his silence to say:
"She's been crying all along, but this is the first time she's asked me for something. She barely told me what she wanted, and now you're rejecting that too..."
If he was rejected this time, the door to her heart that had barely opened might close forever.
Kishian let out a sigh as deep as his worries.
"...I'll think about it and tell you by evening, so keep an eye on my wife until then."
"Yes, Your Highness."
Anne nodded and turned away, as if she thought that was enough to say.
Left alone, Kishian began to think about the Grand Duchess again.
He really didn't want to allow the Grand Duchess to go out, as it seemed like she wanted to escape from this situation.
But the maid's words that her current situation looked serious were not a lie.
It seemed like she was quite shocked that her identity was revealed, but if he continues like this and makes a really bad choice...
'I guess I can grant that request. If I send her with a lot of escorts, there won't be anything to worry about.'
It didn't take long to make a decision.
Of course, he wanted to keep the Grand Duchess safe by his side.
Even if she suffered, he wanted her to suffer by his side.
But still, he wanted her to be by his side with a happy face rather than suffering.
When she goes out and comes back, she'll feel a little better, so they might be able to go back to being a normal, moderately happy couple like before.
He never gave up on that hope.
***
I couldn't even catch a wink of sleep.
I lay there blankly staring at the ceiling until morning came, then got up and got ready to go out.
At first glance, it felt like any other day.
It was an ordinary morning, like the countless days I spent at the Grand Palace.
I also called the maids without showing any unusual expression.
Wash up, eat breakfast, get dressed as usual...
I acted so innocently that no one would notice my decision.
Anne said as she was combing my hair.
"You look bright today."
"I feel a little excited at the thought of going out for the first time in a while."
"I'm glad that His Highness has given you permission to go out. I tried hard to persuade him the day before yesterday. He is so stubborn."
"Thank you, Anne. So... I have something for you."
I opened the drawer and took out three small boxes I had prepared yesterday, and handed them over.
"This is..."
"Gifts. The one in the red box is yours. The blue one is for Madame Bianca, and the green one is for Frida."
"Is it a gift?"
I nodded and answered.
"They're jewelry. They're not new, but they're all good jewelry, so they'll make a lot of money if you sell them."
I heard from Madame Bianca earlier that her second daughter is getting married soon, so she will need money.
Frida and Anne are also responsible for supporting their families, so having some extra money will make things a little easier.
So, I chose gifts that would be as easy to cash in as possible.
"But such a precious thing..."
"Just accept it. It's not something expensive enough to warrant such a burden."
Actually, I wanted to give them something better.
If it weren't for the maids, I probably wouldn't have made it this far.
The gifts I give to my loved ones always feel inadequate, so I really wanted to give them something better, but I didn't have the time for that at the moment.
Instead, I filled in the gaps with words.
"Thank you."
"..."
Anne couldn't answer and just stared blankly at the gift box in her hand.
Did she notice anything?
Soon tears began to form in Anne's eyes.
"Anne."
"Your Highness... Your Highness, is it possible that..."
Anne opened her mouth and looked at me as if she had something to ask.
But in the end, she didn't ask.
The two trembling lips closed gently again.
After sobbing for a while longer, a single word finally came out of her mouth.
"I hope you are always happy."
It seemed as if she had noticed.
But she didn't stop me and told me not to go.
I nodded to Anne and went out.
I had no intention of taking Anne with me.
If I disappeared while we were together, Anne might have been punished for not being able to keep an eye on me.
I got on the carriage alone, which had been prepared in advance.
The coachman immediately started the carriage.
The sight of the Grand Duke's residence outside the window was slowly receding into the distance.
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