55. The reason why I didn't die
Even after seeing Daphne's resigned face, the man continued to spew venomous words.
“If life is like that, then it’s not worth living. Why do you live like a worm, struggling so much? It’s better for a life like yours, a disaster, to die.”
Daphne gasped. He was right. Life was worthless. She felt like a disaster.
In the end, how many people died because of her? She would live her entire life with guilt if even one person died, but many people died because of Daphne.
What was more maddening was that she didn't even know how many people had died.
Daphne sobbed for a long time.
“Answer me! Why didn’t you die? Did you want to live? Did you want to crawl on the ground, for God’s sake? Giving your heart to the Emperor!”
The man shouted. Daphne bit her lip to keep herself from crying.
“What good have you done? Leave the abomination behind! You cuckoo! Just be honest! You wanted to live regardless of whether others got hurt or not! Whether you were free or were made fun of, you just wanted to enjoy the luxury!”
Daphne shook her head without realizing it at the man's words. That wasn't it. It wasn't because she wanted to enjoy luxury.
“Answer me! Why didn’t you die when you knew that the guy who loved you so much died because of you?!”
A red-haired man passed by in the blue sky. She thought of the man who had smiled at her. She thought of the hellish life she had lived after Fabian died.
Those were the days when breathing felt like swallowing a shard of glass.
The pain came back to her mind again. She also wanted to make excuses to the family who had branded her a prostitute.
“I want to die!”
It was a scream, as if she was lashing out. It was a cry of sorrow, as if it were a final struggle, as if it were her last words. In the face of death, Daphne screamed as if she would lose consciousness.
“I wanted to die, but they threatened to kill you if I died!”
“Threat? What?!”
The man paused. He was listening to the dying Daphne's struggling sounds.
“My precious person! He died because of me, and he threatened to kill his family, too! I couldn’t die!”
Daphne bit her lip to make it numb. Fabian. Her feelings for him were diluted. Her guilt toward his family was also fading. But that was something she had tried to forget. She had not forgotten Fabian.
How could she forget the person who showed her freedom? She always felt sorry and sorry.
“It’s true that I wanted to live! But I also thought it would be better to die. But, but... I couldn’t die because he said he’d kill them.”
“...”
The man's eyes trembled under the mask. Now that she looked at them, they looked like Fabian's. She said, as if she was seeing something she missed.
“He said he loved his mother. He said he loved his sister. I could see how much he loved his family. He seemed happy when he talked about his family.”
“...”
“If I die, they’ll kill those people too. I’m sorry that Fabian died because of me, but he said that their family has to die because of me too.”
The masked man listened to Daphne's words with a stiff expression. Daphne was sincere. She tried hard to forget about Fabian, but she couldn't.
Daphne bent over and wept. She wished she could drown herself in tears.
“I’m sorry for being alive. I’m sorry for breathing.”
“...”
“I also think that it would be better for this kind of life to disappear.”
Tears and snot flowed down Daphne's face. The masked man looked down at her. His breathing was shaky. There was a terrible silence.
The man stared intently at Daphne as if he were thinking about something. Her scream was by no means a lie. The face of a woman who had lived in an empty hell was revealed.
Was it the magic of the yoke? The man watched it for a while, then sighed deeply and took off his mask.
"Chief!"
She heard someone's voice.
The middle-aged man with his mask off had a red beard. He was also related to Fabian. Daphne looked at the man with a tearful face.
“That kid... didn’t he talk about his father, about his father?”
Daphne nodded. He spoke with reddened eyes.
Daphne searched her memory. She wanted to convey a memory like a gift to the man who had Fabian's eyes.
'My father is an idiot.'
I remembered what Fabian had said in a grumbling tone.
“He said, ‘You idiot...’”
“Oh, right... That guy is like that.”
He turned his head and exhaled, whoosh, whoosh. Then a masked man approached Fabian's father and said,
“Your Grace, we must execute her. The Emperor must have noticed the strangeness.”
“...”
The middle-aged man looked at the bound Daphne with a serious expression. His eyes changed from murderous to deep sorrow. Then he looked at Daphne again with anger, and his eyes turned to pain.
How can one gauge such a vast emotional change? The leader asked in a stiff voice.
“So, you really didn’t die for Fabian’s family?”
“...”
“Because of Fabian’s mother and sister?”
There was no need to think about that any further. Daphne shook her head.
“At first, I couldn’t die because of that. But I think I also didn’t want to die.”
Her tearful voice was calm.
“It was a horrible life, like a bug, but I still wanted to die. I wanted to live, I think.”
“...”
“If you were worried about them, you wouldn’t have even thought about running away.”
Daphne became a little more honest.
Yes, if she had any affection for Fabian's family, Daphne would not have chosen to run away. Of course, she ran away because she thought that Asherad had forgotten her for three years. But this time, she is thinking of running away because she is prepared to give up everything.
“So please stop killing me now.”
She never thought that this day would ever come. Asherad was absolute.
But now she thought the time had come.
At the point where she found out that this man was related to Fabian, Daphne gave up on her life.
Whatever the pain, let's accept it. Let's not scream or beg for mercy. Daphne smiled.
Oh, if she could find freedom in death, that would be fun too.
I want to follow my mother.
I want to apologize to Fabian.
I want to leave that annoying guy.
“I understand why Fabian liked you.”
“...”
“That must have been the case. Because he emphasized responsibility so incredibly.”
“...”
“...I won’t kill the young lady now. If I kill the young lady, I know what will happen to my wife and daughter.”
There was a strange playfulness in those words. But Daphne saw the hatred in the man’s eyes. It wasn’t hatred directed at Daphne.
“Young lady, you have to survive and pay off your debt.”
He smiled at Daphne. Then the sound of a horn was heard.
“Chief!”
The man chuckled at the urging voice.
“See you later, Miss Daphne.”
“Ugh!”
He picked up the dagger and stabbed Daphne in the chest. Daphne's eyes widened. Perhaps because of the medicine, Daphne's consciousness was fading.
“I’m sorry, we shouldn’t be suspicious of each other.”
After those harsh words, Daphne lost consciousness.
Daphne came to her senses at the touch of the cold ice. It was dark somewhere. Daphne realized that she was inside the barracks.
"Daphne!"
Asherad hugged Daphne, wrapping his arms around her. Daphne was in Asherad's arms with a blank expression. She was somehow sleepy.
“I... was definitely stabbed.”
At Daphne's muttering, Asherad pulled Daphne away from his body.
“Fortunately, the doctor said it wasn’t a deep stab wound.”
Now that she thinks about it, it didn't feel like a sharp stab. If she had to say, it was more like a thud. Daphne, who had been thinking about the grim thoughts without any concern, looked around. The sun was still the same, and judging from the fact that she was inside the tent, she was still in the Arlon Forest.
Considering that patients were usually taken to the palace, the time she lost consciousness would have been very brief.
“The person who stabbed me...”
“We’re tracking them, don’t worry. Daphne.”
Asherad spoke softly. Her heart pounded. Fortunately, Fabian’s father seemed to have escaped capture. At that moment, someone entered the tent. It was the Knight Commander.
“Report.”
The knight commander bowed and said at Asherad's words.
“Your Majesty, we surrounded the forest and pursued them, but we found no one.”
“...”
“I think I missed it.”
Daphne let out a sigh of relief without realizing it. Thank goodness. Daphne got up. Asherad supported her.
“What happened to Count Locania?”
“Your Majesty, there is nothing unusual in the west either.”
Daphne looked over and almost screamed. The man who had just stabbed her was coming in and reporting. Why was Fabian's father there?
She wrapped her neck around Asherad's arms and buried her head in his chest, fearing that he would catch her surprise. Then a hand caressed the back of her neck.
Her heart was pounding.
“Thank you for your hard work, Count Locania.”
"No."
“I am simply fulfilling my duty as the sword of the empire.”
It was a humble remark. The conversation between the culprit, who was hiding his identity, and the person who was trying to find him was so calm. That was why Daphne, who was listening, was sweating coldly. Count Locania. Fabian was the Count's son...
“Most of the people disappeared like a mirage in that forest? Alas.”
Asherad made a knowing expression.
“The traces are not mixed with the hunting contestants, but rather, it means that one of the hunting contestants was a subversive force. Make sure none of the contestants escape, and search their bodies.”
Daphne grabbed Asherad's collar. She grabbed it properly. Daphne slowly raised her head. Count Locania's beard also twitched slightly.
“Your Majesty, I am being presumptuous. If we search the bodies of nobles, there will certainly be some who will be offended.”
Count Locania gently tried to dissuade him. Then Asherad laughed.
“Why, you are the intruder, Count Locania?”
The atmosphere became cold and gloomy.
Even after seeing Daphne's resigned face, the man continued to spew venomous words.
“If life is like that, then it’s not worth living. Why do you live like a worm, struggling so much? It’s better for a life like yours, a disaster, to die.”
Daphne gasped. He was right. Life was worthless. She felt like a disaster.
In the end, how many people died because of her? She would live her entire life with guilt if even one person died, but many people died because of Daphne.
What was more maddening was that she didn't even know how many people had died.
Daphne sobbed for a long time.
“Answer me! Why didn’t you die? Did you want to live? Did you want to crawl on the ground, for God’s sake? Giving your heart to the Emperor!”
The man shouted. Daphne bit her lip to keep herself from crying.
“What good have you done? Leave the abomination behind! You cuckoo! Just be honest! You wanted to live regardless of whether others got hurt or not! Whether you were free or were made fun of, you just wanted to enjoy the luxury!”
Daphne shook her head without realizing it at the man's words. That wasn't it. It wasn't because she wanted to enjoy luxury.
“Answer me! Why didn’t you die when you knew that the guy who loved you so much died because of you?!”
A red-haired man passed by in the blue sky. She thought of the man who had smiled at her. She thought of the hellish life she had lived after Fabian died.
Those were the days when breathing felt like swallowing a shard of glass.
The pain came back to her mind again. She also wanted to make excuses to the family who had branded her a prostitute.
“I want to die!”
It was a scream, as if she was lashing out. It was a cry of sorrow, as if it were a final struggle, as if it were her last words. In the face of death, Daphne screamed as if she would lose consciousness.
“I wanted to die, but they threatened to kill you if I died!”
“Threat? What?!”
The man paused. He was listening to the dying Daphne's struggling sounds.
“My precious person! He died because of me, and he threatened to kill his family, too! I couldn’t die!”
Daphne bit her lip to make it numb. Fabian. Her feelings for him were diluted. Her guilt toward his family was also fading. But that was something she had tried to forget. She had not forgotten Fabian.
How could she forget the person who showed her freedom? She always felt sorry and sorry.
“It’s true that I wanted to live! But I also thought it would be better to die. But, but... I couldn’t die because he said he’d kill them.”
“...”
The man's eyes trembled under the mask. Now that she looked at them, they looked like Fabian's. She said, as if she was seeing something she missed.
“He said he loved his mother. He said he loved his sister. I could see how much he loved his family. He seemed happy when he talked about his family.”
“...”
“If I die, they’ll kill those people too. I’m sorry that Fabian died because of me, but he said that their family has to die because of me too.”
The masked man listened to Daphne's words with a stiff expression. Daphne was sincere. She tried hard to forget about Fabian, but she couldn't.
Daphne bent over and wept. She wished she could drown herself in tears.
“I’m sorry for being alive. I’m sorry for breathing.”
“...”
“I also think that it would be better for this kind of life to disappear.”
Tears and snot flowed down Daphne's face. The masked man looked down at her. His breathing was shaky. There was a terrible silence.
The man stared intently at Daphne as if he were thinking about something. Her scream was by no means a lie. The face of a woman who had lived in an empty hell was revealed.
Was it the magic of the yoke? The man watched it for a while, then sighed deeply and took off his mask.
"Chief!"
She heard someone's voice.
The middle-aged man with his mask off had a red beard. He was also related to Fabian. Daphne looked at the man with a tearful face.
“That kid... didn’t he talk about his father, about his father?”
Daphne nodded. He spoke with reddened eyes.
“Remember, Father. You must have said something about him. He had his quirks, but I loved him anyway.”
'My father is an idiot.'
I remembered what Fabian had said in a grumbling tone.
“He said, ‘You idiot...’”
“Oh, right... That guy is like that.”
He turned his head and exhaled, whoosh, whoosh. Then a masked man approached Fabian's father and said,
“Your Grace, we must execute her. The Emperor must have noticed the strangeness.”
“...”
The middle-aged man looked at the bound Daphne with a serious expression. His eyes changed from murderous to deep sorrow. Then he looked at Daphne again with anger, and his eyes turned to pain.
How can one gauge such a vast emotional change? The leader asked in a stiff voice.
“So, you really didn’t die for Fabian’s family?”
“...”
“Because of Fabian’s mother and sister?”
There was no need to think about that any further. Daphne shook her head.
“At first, I couldn’t die because of that. But I think I also didn’t want to die.”
Her tearful voice was calm.
“It was a horrible life, like a bug, but I still wanted to die. I wanted to live, I think.”
“...”
“If you were worried about them, you wouldn’t have even thought about running away.”
Daphne became a little more honest.
Yes, if she had any affection for Fabian's family, Daphne would not have chosen to run away. Of course, she ran away because she thought that Asherad had forgotten her for three years. But this time, she is thinking of running away because she is prepared to give up everything.
“So please stop killing me now.”
She never thought that this day would ever come. Asherad was absolute.
But now she thought the time had come.
At the point where she found out that this man was related to Fabian, Daphne gave up on her life.
Whatever the pain, let's accept it. Let's not scream or beg for mercy. Daphne smiled.
Oh, if she could find freedom in death, that would be fun too.
I want to follow my mother.
I want to apologize to Fabian.
I want to leave that annoying guy.
“I understand why Fabian liked you.”
“...”
“That must have been the case. Because he emphasized responsibility so incredibly.”
“...”
“...I won’t kill the young lady now. If I kill the young lady, I know what will happen to my wife and daughter.”
There was a strange playfulness in those words. But Daphne saw the hatred in the man’s eyes. It wasn’t hatred directed at Daphne.
“Young lady, you have to survive and pay off your debt.”
He smiled at Daphne. Then the sound of a horn was heard.
“Chief!”
The man chuckled at the urging voice.
“See you later, Miss Daphne.”
“Ugh!”
He picked up the dagger and stabbed Daphne in the chest. Daphne's eyes widened. Perhaps because of the medicine, Daphne's consciousness was fading.
“I’m sorry, we shouldn’t be suspicious of each other.”
After those harsh words, Daphne lost consciousness.
***
Daphne came to her senses at the touch of the cold ice. It was dark somewhere. Daphne realized that she was inside the barracks.
"Daphne!"
Asherad hugged Daphne, wrapping his arms around her. Daphne was in Asherad's arms with a blank expression. She was somehow sleepy.
“I... was definitely stabbed.”
At Daphne's muttering, Asherad pulled Daphne away from his body.
“Fortunately, the doctor said it wasn’t a deep stab wound.”
Now that she thinks about it, it didn't feel like a sharp stab. If she had to say, it was more like a thud. Daphne, who had been thinking about the grim thoughts without any concern, looked around. The sun was still the same, and judging from the fact that she was inside the tent, she was still in the Arlon Forest.
Considering that patients were usually taken to the palace, the time she lost consciousness would have been very brief.
“The person who stabbed me...”
“We’re tracking them, don’t worry. Daphne.”
Asherad spoke softly. Her heart pounded. Fortunately, Fabian’s father seemed to have escaped capture. At that moment, someone entered the tent. It was the Knight Commander.
“Report.”
The knight commander bowed and said at Asherad's words.
“Your Majesty, we surrounded the forest and pursued them, but we found no one.”
“...”
“I think I missed it.”
Daphne let out a sigh of relief without realizing it. Thank goodness. Daphne got up. Asherad supported her.
“What happened to Count Locania?”
“Your Majesty, there is nothing unusual in the west either.”
Daphne looked over and almost screamed. The man who had just stabbed her was coming in and reporting. Why was Fabian's father there?
She wrapped her neck around Asherad's arms and buried her head in his chest, fearing that he would catch her surprise. Then a hand caressed the back of her neck.
Her heart was pounding.
“Thank you for your hard work, Count Locania.”
"No."
“You and your vassals, Duke of Turbol, are always so helpful.”
It was a humble remark. The conversation between the culprit, who was hiding his identity, and the person who was trying to find him was so calm. That was why Daphne, who was listening, was sweating coldly. Count Locania. Fabian was the Count's son...
“Most of the people disappeared like a mirage in that forest? Alas.”
Asherad made a knowing expression.
“The traces are not mixed with the hunting contestants, but rather, it means that one of the hunting contestants was a subversive force. Make sure none of the contestants escape, and search their bodies.”
Daphne grabbed Asherad's collar. She grabbed it properly. Daphne slowly raised her head. Count Locania's beard also twitched slightly.
“Your Majesty, I am being presumptuous. If we search the bodies of nobles, there will certainly be some who will be offended.”
Count Locania gently tried to dissuade him. Then Asherad laughed.
“Why, you are the intruder, Count Locania?”
The atmosphere became cold and gloomy.
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