26. Epidemics
The King's funeral, which lasted for 100 days, was finally over. People took off their black mourning clothes, but the mood in the kingdom was still uneasy. The decisive reason for the postponement of Johannes's coronation was the epidemic.
“The spread of the epidemic that started in the south is showing an alarming trend.”
One of the people who had gathered secretly at Birch Castle spoke seriously. Damien looked at the piled-up reports in front of him once more. The disease that causes a high fever of unknown origin and causes collapse has no cure and is highly contagious, making people tremble with fear even more. At this rate, even Tisse, which is relatively far from the epicenter of the outbreak, could no longer be safe.
“How are Johannes’s movements?”
As Damien opened his mouth, Weiss frowned and answered.
“Even in this situation, he raised his voice in the parliament, saying that the coronation should proceed quickly, but when he saw his secretary collapse before his eyes due to the epidemic, he hurriedly left the place with only his closest aides to a secret villa located on the outskirts of the capital.”
It was clear that he had an extremely strong fear of death, as he was originally mentally unstable.
“The plan keeps getting delayed, so wouldn’t it be better to bring it forward?”
“There are reports that the Prince has joined hands with the Carter Duchy. If he tries to strengthen the legitimacy of his throne by relying on the Carter Duchy’s power, things will get complicated.”
Damien, sitting at the head of the long table, listened silently to what they were saying. There was no problem with cutting off Johannes’s head right away. Johannes’s abilities were too inadequate to have the fortune of inheriting the throne, and he was not in his right mind. Damien was not the type to watch a madman ruin the country, and he was not good enough to swear allegiance to someone inferior to himself.
“What would you like to do, Your Excellency?”
There was only one reason he had hesitated until now. He didn't want to be remembered by Chloe as someone who had killed his own blood relatives. It didn't matter now. After that stormy night, he wanted to make it even clearer to Chloe, who was looking at him with creepy eyes. This is me. Admit that she loves this man.
“I think it would be better to deal with Johannes.”
The moment Damien spoke in a cold voice, the eyes of those gathered looked both determined and relieved. This was because they had been objecting to his inaction up until now.
“It’s a messy situation, so it might be easy to blame it on an infectious disease.”
“Yes, if you don’t want to move yourself...”
"No."
Damien raised an eyebrow at Weiss, who seemed to be showing some concern.
“I must cut off Johannes’s head myself. That is the final courtesy I owe to my royal family and relatives.”
“Then... when do you plan on going to Swanton?”
When someone asked cautiously, Damien spat out softly.
“Tomorrow morning, at sunrise, I will set out with you.”
***
Damien informed the butler of his schedule. When he said that he might be away for a while this time, the butler replied with a loyal expression, “Don’t worry.”
A banquet was held at Birch Castle, where guests had been welcomed for a long time. Chloe also sat next to Damien and took the place of hostess, as the Duke had said that he would be away for a while. She was dressed in a perfect evening dress, and her velvet gloves that went up to her elbows looked loose, so she looked so slender. However, if you looked closely, you could vaguely see that her slightly bulging belly was not a single body.
“It is an honor to have you stay with us until so late, Duchess.”
After dinner, they moved to a place to have a light drink. Weiss, who was familiar with Chloe, smiled and spoke to her.
"No."
Chloe shook her head in slight denial. Weiss continued speaking to her with a friendly expression, seemingly uncomfortable for some reason.
“His Excellency the Duke has great concern and affection for his wife.”
In fact, everyone in the room knew the purpose of the Duke's visit to the capital tomorrow, but Chloe did not. Given the Duke's personality, it was also unlikely that he would have given advance notice to his pregnant wife.
“I’m sure he'll be back tomorrow after finishing his schedule at Swanton in a hurry. Madam, no matter what happens, please don’t worry and just take care of your health.”
Chloe remained calm, not knowing whether she was aware of Weiss's efforts to ease her anxiety and tension without knowing the details of the situation.
“His Excellency's plans are always flawless. Of course, I have no need to worry.”
“The person who has become the biggest variable in my life is greatly overestimating me.”
Damien, who had been silent, slowly opened his mouth. Chloe naturally avoided his gaze as he poured his drink, and instead of answering, she looked for her servant.
“The gentlemen are leaving before breakfast tomorrow morning, so please ask Mrs. Dutton to pack some food for them to eat in the carriage.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Chloe opened her mouth, wiping the sweat from her forehead with the handkerchief she was holding.
“Then, may I step aside first so that the gentlemen can talk comfortably?”
“It’s our last night before we leave, so why don’t you stay with me a little longer?”
Damien looked at her and spoke quietly. While the gentlemen present were coughing slightly and each was lost in their own romantic sentiments, Chloe alone felt extremely uncomfortable at this time.
"...All right."
In fact, it had been a long time since she had come out to dinner and had a meal. Since the day of the autumn storm, Damien had left Chloe alone, as Chloe had wished.
Chloe did not eat with Damien after that day, and even when she went out for a walk, she moved with her maid. However, she did not know that her husband was watching her every move. Damien seemed to be waiting for the moment when he would be left 'alone' with her.
As her belly grew, it was obvious that his patience would be stretched to its limit. Chloe was rather grateful that she was pregnant.
“Your Excellency the Duke’s child will live in a world that is different from the past in many ways. Isn’t that right?”
Someone in the room spoke with a slightly drunken expression on their face. Johannes's resignation was something they had planned for a long time, but when it was about to happen, they were overcome with an inevitable sense of tension and excitement that made it difficult to calm down. Damien lightly raised his glass toward him.
“There is no need to include future descendants. This applies to us who are here now. Haven’t we already experienced many changes in our lives? Just like the world before and after the war is different.”
“That is a valid point.”
Damien moistened his lips with red wine and chuckled.
“Well, it would be different if you were planning to pass away within a few days, right?”
“Hahaha. Sorry, but I don’t have any plans for that yet.”
Damien was good at making people feel relaxed by making jokes in the face of important events with uncertain outcomes. Most of them had been on the battlefield with him at least once, so they were used to his methods.
“Not everyone wants change.”
The men's joking laughter suddenly stopped. Chloe, who had been silently listening to the conversation, just smiled. When Damien turned his gaze to her, Chloe continued speaking in a small but clear voice.
“Some people live quite content with the world they live in now.”
The air above the spacious dining table changed slightly. Damien asked as the wood in the fireplace crackled.
“Even if it’s a change for the better?”
“Who decides what the better direction is in the first place?”
Chloe gasped and swallowed dryly. Sweat beaded on her pale forehead. She had not been feeling well since dinner, and it was getting harder and harder to bear. Was it because she had forced herself to attend in the first place, because she didn't want to be nitpicked by Damien?
“Chloe.”
Damien frowned slightly and tilted his head toward her, who was sitting on the edge of the table. The moment he saw her face, soaked in cold sweat, swaying under the candlelight of the chandelier, Damien took off his gloves and grabbed her cheek with his bare hand.
“Why are you like this?”
Damien's face hardened as he felt her hot body temperature directly. Everyone present was taken aback by the Duke's words, which threw away any courtesy toward his wife, and coughed softly.
“Your Excellency.”
Chloe forced her voice out, pushing his arm away with her limp hand.
“I’m not feeling well... I think I should get up first.”
“I will guide you to the bedroom.”
The Duke followed her and jumped up from his seat. The faces of those present were filled with worry, concern, and confusion. The one with the sharpest eyes was Damien.
“No. We can’t just leave the guests and leave all of us behind...”
As Chloe stumbled, panting, Damien wrapped his arms around her waist. It wasn't just her face that was hot. Even though she was wearing thick clothes, her entire body felt like a fireball. It was as if she had come all the way here to stay and watch the dinner table in this body.
No way. A look of despair appeared in his eyes.
“Your Excellency, please bring the Duchess...”
“Stay away, don’t come near me.”
“Your Excellency.”
“Can’t you hear what I’m saying?”
Damien lifted her up in his arms and gave her orders in a quick voice.
“Everyone, return to your rooms immediately and check your health. Keep servants out until the doctor arrives. Do not contact anyone until you have been examined by the doctor.”
Chloe lost consciousness in his arms. It was the day when the epidemic that had spread silently to Tisse revealed its terrifying identity.
***
“Will you tell me the truth, Sir Brown?”
“There is still no definitive cure for the epidemic. We can only pray that the Duchess will overcome the disease.”
Guilt and regret spread across the face of Brown, the Duke's personal doctor. Priscilla, who was beside him, sighed repeatedly, clutching her handkerchief tightly.
“Wasn’t there a report that some of the symptoms of the epidemic improved when the herb of Remetia, which is effective against fever, was administered? Why didn’t it work at all for the Duchess?”
“That. That...”
When Damien pointed it out, the attending doctor trailed off and made an awkward expression. Damien glared at him sharply and continued speaking in a low voice.
“I think you know better than anyone that time is running out. It’s already been four days since the Duchess was unconscious.”
Brown opened his mouth with a determined expression as he read the warning message in his voice.
“Actually... the day she collapsed, Madam asked me to do something.”
“No, what on earth did a child who was unconscious and couldn’t speak properly say, Sir Brown?”
When Priscilla did not hide her worry, Brown answered with a complicated expression.
“Yes. Even while she was in and out of consciousness, Madam strongly ordered me... not to give her any medicine that could harm the child.”
"What?"
Damien's eyes flashed with a sharp, aggressive glare as he asked briefly. The attending doctor, who knew the gravity of the situation well, swallowed dry saliva and tried to continue his explanation calmly.
“Your Excellency, like Her Excellency the Duchess, already knew about the severity of the epidemic. As a person with medical knowledge, I also thought it was not strange.”
“Just tell me the conclusion.”
Damien cut him off as his words grew longer. Brown finally broke the silence in the freezing air.
“Remetia herb increases the risk of premature birth when taken by pregnant women.”
Damien's brow furrowed ominously.
“Bring that medicine right here in front of me.”
“Hey, Damien.”
“Are you saying that you’ve been able to hold out this whole time without taking medicine just because of that reason?”
“We cannot force a patient to continue receiving treatment they do not want, Your Excellency.”
Damien gritted his teeth as he watched the doctor's expression change from a sense of duty to confusion.
“If a patient asks you to kill him, it sounds like you’re going to kill him. Tell me with your own mouth what the doctor’s duty is.”
“Damien, Chloe loves the child in her womb more than her own life. Don’t you really know your wife’s personality?”
Despite Priscilla's persuasion, Damien's anger did not stop.
“I know full well that I will not lose my wife for such a trivial reason.”
It was a matter of seconds before Damien grabbed Brown by the shoulder and reached for the medicine bag he was hiding. As he was walking into the bedroom with a labeled vial, Priscilla whispered softly behind him.
“Damien, please understand Chloe.”
“It’s impossible, Mother.”
“Then at least try.”
Priscilla's voice sounded like an appeal, but it did not reach Damien's ears. He felt an intense urge to tear the limbs of the attending doctor who had accepted such a mere excuse and delayed treatment to save the unborn child.
“I’ll think about it after I save her.”
Damien's expression was colder than the north wind in midwinter.
“If the Duchess does something wrong, you will pay the price.”
Brown took off his glasses and touched his temple. As a doctor, when he thought about it calmly, it was too much to expect a miracle where both the Duchess and the child would live. Rationally, it would have been right to prescribe medicine and bring down her fever first. However... If he had seen the Duchess’s desperate face, shedding tears and saying that she could not live if the child died, anyone would have made the same choice.
“Is Chloe okay? Can you tell her she’s okay?”
“...I hope so too.”
Priscilla clasped her hands together in front of the closed bedroom door. She could not come forward recklessly because she understood both Chloe’s maternal instincts as she carried her child in her womb and Damien’s heart as he could not lose the woman he loved for the first time in his life.
Marriage was when two people from different worlds met and formed a family. Damien and Chloe were surprisingly compatible in some ways, but they had stark differences in their core values.
In order to close that gap, they would have to take a step closer to each other. In order to do that, Chloe had to get over her illness and get back on her feet. Priscilla could only pray earnestly that God would give them another chance.
***
Chloe opened her eyes with difficulty at the sound of the door being roughly shut. Margaret, who had been nursing her all night, quietly left her seat after seeing the Duke. Damien approached Chloe, whose face was so pale that it was indistinguishable from the bed sheets, and took his dry lips away.
“How are you feeling?”
The sunken eyes slowly closed and opened. The brown pupils were half-focused, and the voice that came out of the lips that were barely open showed no energy at all.
“I had a dream about my mother.”
Damien's throat rippled violently as he swallowed dry saliva.
“Until now, I only heard her voice... but this time, for the first time... she even showed up. I was so... happy...”
Chloe's gasping and labored breathing sounded like the sound of her soul leaving her. Blue veins appeared on the back of Damien's white hand holding the vial.
“Just like when I was young... You picked a bunch of blue forget-me-nots by the river... and gave them to me... Gulp...”
“Don't talk.”
“She... hugged me.”
Chloe's lips, dry and white from all the moisture, turned upwards in a smile. As he watched her smiling face, sweating profusely and writhing in pain, Damien vividly felt a fire rising inside him. It felt as if the embers of anger growing in his stomach would burn his entire body.
“It’s a similar color to your eyes... I wonder what color our child’s eyes will be... whether they’ll be the same as yours... or will they resemble me...”
She gasped for breath.
“Did my mother tell you...?”
Damien couldn't listen any longer. He approached her, who was confusing dreams with reality, and opened the bottle.
“We’ll have to get ourselves out of the way first to check that out, Chloe.”
Damien, who was supporting Chloe's back and helping her up, felt a hot lava-like anger bursting out of his chest. Her skinny body was as heavy as a feather, not much different from a pillow. Her body, sagging, suddenly turned her head and asked him.
“What kind of... medicine is that?”
“Drink.”
As Damien held the vial with his mouth shut, Chloe instinctively jerked her head to the side. Damien muttered softly as he watched her tremble like a deer at the sound of a gunshot.
“You have to drink, Chloe.”
"...no, I do not want."
Chloe's eyes, noticing the situation, returned to focus. Damien chewed his lips and muttered quietly.
“I hope I don’t force you to take it. And if I hear that sound coming out of your mouth one more time, you’ll be forced to take this medicine.”
“I won’t give my child any medicine that would be harmful to him.”
“If you don’t drink this, you’ll die.”
Chloe's dry lips let out a self-deprecating whisper. Her head shook violently from side to side.
“I can't do that.”
“No. You have to do that.”
“...I can’t do it.”
A beastly growl came out of Damien's teeth.
“Do you think that a Duchess has to die before completing a year of married life?”
Chloe, who had been avoiding eye contact, turned her head and glared at him. Chloe's face turned pale, and her eyes sparkled.
“How could you directly inject poison into our child and kill him!!!”
Her eyes, which looked as if she would collapse at any moment, flashed like a madman. Damien thought that was better. He was relieved that she, who couldn't tell the difference between dreams and reality and who seemed like she would leave the world at any moment, came to her senses and screamed.
“Think carefully, Chloe. If you don’t take this medicine, there’s a high probability that you’ll be reunited with your mother in heaven. Your chances of survival are extremely slim.”
“If I take this medicine, my child will die.”
“The sample size is too small to be sure. You know that, right?”
Damien didn't miss the flickering of Chloe's eyes. He held her confused gaze tightly.
“Wake up and think calmly. There are definitely people who took this medicine and didn’t have premature births. Their children were born without any problems. But what if you die before that? You’re basically not giving the child in your womb a chance to be born.”
“Ugh...”
Tears flowed from Chloe's sunken eyes. Damien looked straight at her, holding the tears that were continuously falling from the tip of her chin in his hand.
“The child of Tisse will never die.”
Chloe's hunched shoulders trembled slightly. Her dry lips were wet with tears, and she let out a thin sob or a whisper.
“Ah, ah... baby... ah...”
“You can think of it as the last. Trust me, Chloe. This is the only way for everyone to survive.”
Chloe tried to take the vial from Damien's hand, but her hands were shaking too much. Damien grabbed her hand and brought the vial to her lips. Chloe's brown eyes met his gaze.
Emotions flashed through her bloodshot eyes. As if she were reproaching him, yet still wanting to rely on a ray of hope. As soon as the medicine entered her lips, which were clearly showing her pain, she spat it out. Her head accepted it, but her whole body rejected it. Damien chewed his lips as he watched Chloe sobbing and chattering her teeth.
Shit.
He downed the bottle in one gulp and then put his face against Chloe's. The desperate sobs were transmitted through their lips. Damien looked straight into Chloe's eyes and swallowed her bursting sorrow. He held onto her tightly as she bit her lip and struggled, breathing fierce life into her.
I have never failed you, and I will not fail you again. I will make you happy enough to forget all your pain, so please live. Chloe.
Chloe, who had passed out after taking the medicine, hovered between life and death for two days. Her fever began to subside when her bleeding stopped. The servants of the Duke felt relief for the Duchess, who had overcome the epidemic and survived, as well as pity for her child, who had been so tragically lost.
“Are you okay, ma’am?”
“Please keep counting.”
Mrs. Dutton sighed as she stirred the bread dough.
“Getting absorbed in something is just to forget something.”
“You’re so normal, it’s almost strange.”
Margaret lowered her voice slightly, looking worried. Mrs. Dutton sighed deeply and blinked.
“When I see the laundry maid changing the wet pillowcases every day, I can imagine how the madam feels, and my heart aches.”
“I wish she would express her anger or sadness instead.”
“Seeing that she has to be formal even in times like this, I don’t know if the life of a nobleman is all that great.”
As the butler appeared, the two people who had been talking shut their mouths. Paul looked at them and warned them with a stern expression.
“Margaret, when do you plan on bringing the tea out to the drawing room?”
“Now.”
Margaret, carrying a silver tray, hurried out of the kitchen and headed to the drawing room. Chloe was looking out the window in the drawing room, lost in thought.
"Madam."
“...Margaret.”
Chloe noticed the presence of people belatedly and turned her head.
“Aren’t you cold? Would you like some more coal?”
“Would you do that?”
Chloe looked at her with a faint smile. After losing her child to the pandemic, Chloe felt a different wall than before. Of course, it would be strange for a person not to change after going through such a big thing, but Margaret felt a little regretful.
"Madam."
"Yes."
“If there is anything I can do, please tell me so I can do it. Not only I, but all the servants of this castle think so too. Of course... You are the mistress of this castle.”
“You are a very good person, Margaret.”
Chloe continued speaking softly to her.
“When I collapsed, you stayed by my side and nursed me without sleeping. I didn’t even get to properly thank you for taking the risk.”
“I am your dedicated maid. I just did what was expected of me.”
“There is nothing in the world that should be done naturally.”
There is only sincerity. Margaret, who felt a little choked up in front of Chloe, who was whispering softly, wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.
“I worked as a kitchen maid, and all I heard was nagging about where I was spending my time. If you have time to wake up at the crack of dawn and do your hair, you should learn how to bake a pie properly.”
“I liked the way you were always dressed. Even at the most formal balls at the Swanton, I never saw a lady with her hair done as nicely as yours. So I thought you would be the perfect person to help me out on my day.”
Margaret blinked quickly twice, then closed her reddened eyes and smiled.
“Just let me know when you’re ready to go to the Swanton.”
This winter has been a time of turmoil not only in Tisse but also throughout the kingdom. The fact that word of the troubles in Swanton had spread to this place made it clear that the situation was serious. It had been a week since Mrs. Dutton complained that the railway strike was causing difficulties in transporting food.
Johannes, who had fled to the outskirts while the epidemic was spreading in Tisse, returned to the palace when the situation calmed down and held a hasty coronation ceremony with only a few high-ranking clergy. Disappointed citizens were dissatisfied with the King, who was only concerned with his own survival rather than trying to calm the epidemic situation, and telegrams were sent to the Duke every day. Margaret, a mere maid, noticed that something was serious and that the Duke had to leave for Swanto right away, and Chloe could not have been unaware.
“I want to go see the theater soon, too.”
As Margaret smiled brightly, Chloe faced her.
“You haven’t given up on your dream of becoming an actress, have you?”
“Can someone like me, who has no numbers, become an actor?”
“I will cheer you on from the front row of the stage where you are the main character.”
“I know when that day will come.”
As Margaret smiled shyly, the Duke's footsteps were heard through the door.
"Then, if you need anything, please call me."
As the maid quietly left after putting down the tea, silence fell over the spacious living room. Chloe quietly turned her gaze to Damien, who was sitting on the single sofa to her right, and poured the tea. Gulp. Hot water dripped into the fancy teacup, and the fragrant scent of the tea wafted to her nose.
“Once your body is somewhat stable, it would be better to leave for Swan.”
“Yes. Sure.”
Damien remained silent for a moment as Chloe answered obediently. Chloe smiled slightly at Damien, who was looking at her with suspicious eyes.
“It was midwinter when I first came here, and it’s winter when I leave here too.”
“...”
“I think I’ll remember Tisse as winter.”
It seemed to imply something. Damien stared at her intently and opened his mouth.
“You’ve definitely experienced all four seasons of Tisse. Winter seems to be the most memorable.”
“Yes.”
Chloe tilted her teacup, looking straight at him.
“It was terribly long.”
A light flashed silently in Damien’s eyes. Crack. There was a faint sound of the stacked logs collapsing inside the fireplace. Chloe filled her empty teacup with graceful hands, then turned her head out the window where the winter sunlight was shining. Her eyes narrowed as she looked at the landscape of the backyard, where the gray birch trees were covered in snow.
“Thank goodness. Swanton’s winter won’t be as long as Tisse’s.”
“You’ll eventually overthrow the King and take his place, right?”
“Unless something unexpected happens.”
Chloe knew that he had to leave for Swanton as soon as possible. It had been a month since she had recovered from her illness. In the meantime, Count Weiss had visited Birch Castle twice and had long conversations with the Duke.
“Even though Lord Brown told me I was over the edge, why didn’t you leave for Swanton?”
Damien answered Chloe's soft question briefly.
"Because I didn't want to."
"So, I'm asking why you, Your Excellency, didn't want to do it."
Chloe's voice was slightly higher than usual. She continued before Damien, who furrowed his brows slightly, could answer.
“Was it because you felt guilty about the Duke killing my child?”
Her brown eyes looked straight at him.
“Or was it to play the role of a loving husband in front of people?”
Chloe didn’t stop talking even as she watched Damien’s face harden.
“Or were you afraid that I would commit suicide and disgrace the great Tisde family?”
“Chloe von Tisse.”
“Don’t call me by that name!!!”
As Chloe gasped for breath, the butler nearby looked at her in surprise.
“Master, madam. Whatever happens...”
“Close the door and let no one come near until I call.”
At Damien’s low command, the door to the reception room was firmly shut.
“Answer my question.”
“Do you really want to hear the answer?”
Chloe grimaced as she looked at Damien, who was looking at her with a cold face. She wanted to return the favor to the person who had been spewing arrow-like questions at her every day.
“Yes. I don’t intend to believe every lie that comes out of your mouth anyway.”
“I guess we’ll have to postpone going to Swanton. You need stability now.”
“No. I’m ready to go to Swanton.”
Chloe cut Damien off and lifted her head. She spoke the words she had been preparing for quite some time.
“We need to hurry if we want to file divorce papers at Swanton’s court before you become king.”
“Divorce?”
His expression changed completely. He lifted his lips up crookedly as if he had heard a very funny story, but it was impossible not to know that it was an expression of anger. Chloe looked straight into his eyes, blazing with anger, and continued.
“Yes.”
“Who the hell is talking about divorce?”
“I remember what you said before. We only have one child and there won’t be any more. With no heirs, divorce is a given.”
“Chloe, you’re not so stupid as to not think about being flexible when circumstances change.”
Chloe's clenched fist trembled at Damien's sharp rebuke. If he knew how much his words that this would be the first and last pregnancy had burdened her, he shouldn't have said such things now. If he knew how much she cherished the child, he shouldn't have laughed at her by talking about 'flexible thinking'. After all, Chloe had come to know that everything surrounding her was a lie, and the child was the only truth she could rely on.
“You tricked me until the very end and pushed me over the edge. You made me test the child. I shouldn’t have taken that medicine, in the end I... I...!”
“If you hadn’t taken that medicine, you would have died.”
“Then you should have just let me die!!!”
Chloe shed hot tears, her veins rising on her slender neck. As she gasped for breath and clutched her chest, Damien came closer and met her eyes. Looking directly into her eyes, Damien whispered bitterly.
“Let me answer the question I asked you earlier. The reason I forced you to take that drug was to save you. Because I love you so much, Chloe. After all the hard work I put into having you, you can’t leave me so soon, right?”
Chloe's body trembled.
“You are not worthy of mentioning love.”
“You have no right to judge my feelings either. This is the love I make, Chloe von Tisse.”
“I never wanted that kind of love.”
Chloe spat out sharply through her teeth. She wanted to hurt him. She wanted his heart to be torn to shreds, just like hers.
“Is that really so?”
Damien whispered wickedly, holding her gaze.
“Can you guarantee that I am not in your head, in your soul?”
Why did God give the devil such a beautiful face and a three-inch tongue? Why did he make her believe his words of love?
“That was until I saw your dirty secret one stormy night.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Chloe. That’s not such a big secret to me. If it were, I wouldn’t have forgotten that I even put it there. If it was such a big secret, I would have burned it all down to ashes the moment you confessed your love to me.”
Chloe's eyes filled with tears, and she trembled.
“Don’t you have any shame?”
“It might be so for those who swore to become one before God.”
“How can you be so confident when everything about your marriage was a lie?”
“I said I could explain everything from beginning to end, but you were the one who refused. You were the one who blocked your ears and closed your eyes to avoid seeing the truth.”
“You’ve had more than your fair share of opportunities. You’ve had... so many opportunities to tell me the truth.”
Chloe thought back to the countless nights and days she had spent with him. She felt something hot burst inside her as the happy moments she had melted into his secret gaze as he looked at her flashed through her mind. She truly loved Damien. She felt nauseous as she remembered what she had done to please him, to see those beautiful lips turn up in an arc as they looked at her.
“Did it ever occur to you, even a little bit, that you should tell me the truth, since I gave you everything because I loved you?”
Even at the moment when he put his hands in her hair and moaned on the bed, even at the moment when he touched her cheeks full of himself and the veins on his arms stood out, Damien ran only towards his own desires, not caring about her true feelings.
“Why should I do that?”
His voice cracked, leaving Chloe speechless. Goosebumps ran down Chloe's skin as if windows had shattered everywhere, as if the temperature in the room had dropped completely.
“Why should I plant a single ray of anxiety in your eyes that adore me?”
Damien's lips twisted and distorted.
“I wasn’t stupid enough to leave you alone, dammit.”
Chloe could sense his anger clearly. And it was painfully clear to her that there was only one reason he was angry right now. Damien was angry right now at the very situation where a 'small' thing he had carelessly forgotten had snowballed into something bigger.
“I admit my mistake, so now I’m making sure you’re never out of my sight.”
Chloe's eyes shook with despair as she heard the real reason why he didn't leave for Swanton.
“You have no right to reject me, Chloe.”
“Please let me go.”
“The word divorce will never exist in my life. It won’t exist in yours either.”
“...So are you saying we should continue this empty marriage until we die?”
Damien smiled at Chloe, who asked with a dejected face.
“Remember that this tedious winter you spoke of will end someday. Don’t make the mistake of kicking away the paradise that will unfold before your eyes because you can’t stand this time.”
Chloe closed her eyes silently, speechless. Then Damien ran his hand down the back of her neck, savoring it.
“I love you.”
Chloe slowly opened her closed eyes. The man who had whispered words of love to her with his beautiful face that captivated others slowly approached her and kissed her. The light kiss soon changed into a deep kiss with clear intentions. At the end of Damian’s gaze, looking at Chloe’s wet lips, a flame of desire burned.
“You just...”
Damien's knees slowly touched the floor. The two hands that were rolling up her skirt slowly took control of her. The morning sunlight reflected off Damien's dazzling blond hair, and for a moment, he looked almost holy. Chloe whispered softly, gasping for breath.
“It’s good that I move according to your will.”
“...Maybe so.”
Damien did not deny it. Chloe's green dress hem spread out on the gorgeous red sofa. Chloe's eyes, looking down at Damien's dazzling blond hair, were blurred and wet. Her skin flushed red as he wanted, and her vocal cords continuously emitted moans and whimpers as he stimulated them.
“But you love me like this.”
As Chloe's handprints spread across the velvet sofa, Damien's hand clasped around hers. Chloe sobbed like a completely captured prey. Maybe Damien was right. Maybe she still loved him.
“Face what’s important, Chloe. Don’t make stupid choices in a moment of anger that lead you to give up what’s most important, my love.”
As she trembled at the pleasure that Damien poured out, Chloe thought, what she wanted from him was a sincere apology. And she realized with a bitterness that she would never get what she wanted again. The last ray of hope she had held onto was completely gone.
“Yes, I love you. It just happened that way.”
Damien's lips drew a satisfied curve at the tearful words that fell from her mouth. Chloe added to him.
“And I regret it deeply.”
“Time will heal everything. Trust me, Chloe.”
Chloe closed her eyes as she listened to Damien's voice whispering affectionately. Chloe had once told him with certainty that she could not love someone who could not forgive.
But when she could no longer forgive someone she had already fallen in love with, she didn't know what to do. Of all the people she had truly loved, none had ever made her so desperate. Even when Alice left home without a word, she didn't hate her. Even when her father brought the family to the brink of bankruptcy, she felt more regret than resentment.
“Is there any other woman who can make me kneel besides you?”
Damien, kneeling between her legs, did not look shabby, but rather the opposite. At this moment, he was the one holding her breath and continuing the hunt until the end. Chloe bit her lip as she exhaled rapidly.
"Ha..."
Now she vaguely knew. When she could not forgive the person she loved, what decision would she make? No, maybe she already knew. Maybe she had been postponing that moment, or hiding behind her love, giving herself a reason not to leave him until the very end.
“Ahh. Chloe. You’re so sweet.”
Damien's voice was filled with joy. It was as if he were appreciating a work of art he had created.
“It’s only natural that all my shame, prostrating myself like a dog in front of you, would disappear.”
Damien must know that Chloe's shame is reaching its limit as he whispers, enjoying her reaction.
Long tears fell from Chloe's eyes. She could no longer avoid them. Chloe Verdier was not a person who could hold love and hate in the same heart. She had already expected that they would not be able to part beautifully. Her legs, which were on Damien's shoulders, clenched tightly and trembled.
Only when the butler came running into the living room did Damien raise his face while slowly lowering her skirt.
"What?"
Chloe took her breath away as she stared at the fireplace, trying to look away while Damien took off his cravat and cleaned his face.
“I apologize, my lord. An urgent message has arrived from Count Weiss’s men.”
The fact that the butler had barged into a place where the owner had forbidden entry without warning meant that the matter was not trivial. Damien silently accepted the letter he had been handed. It was Weiss's own handwriting, written in a hurry.
“I need to get ready to leave for Swanton right away.”
“Is there something urgent, Master?”
Damien opened his mouth with a stern expression in response to the butler's question.
“They say the citizens rioted. Mobs of people gathered sporadically from all over the city and burned down the royal villa in one day.”
The telegram said that Johannes was currently missing and that the royal army was in disarray due to the King's absence. Someone was needed to take command of the situation as soon as possible.
Damien took a deep breath. A new era had already begun. He was the one who would eventually get everything he wanted, one way or another.
“You will guard the Duchess here until everything is sorted out.”
“Please let me go too. I’m so confused, I want to be alone.”
Damien looked into Chloe's eyes as she opened her mouth with a trembling voice, then shook his head.
“A woman who is to become a Queen should not go to the church in person with divorce papers.”
“...I won’t do that.”
Chloe opened her eyes wide and whispered. And Damien knew. The truth was hidden in her wavering eyes. No. You can't fool me, Chloe.
Damien's pleas were useless. Damien, at a loss, gave orders in a low voice to the butler, who kept his mouth shut.
“Until I give my permission, do not let the Duchess leave this castle even one step.”
“Damien.”
Chloe looked at him in disbelief, but Damien didn't budge.
“Don’t forget to be extra vigilant, as my wife may become neurotic in confusing situations.”
Paul, the butler, was also embarrassed.
“Then what about the events inside and outside the territory...”
“Send word to Lady Priscilla immediately and have her come to Birch Castle, and leave external affairs to my mother.”
“Damien!!!”
His back, walking away without looking back, disappeared from Chloe's sight.
For several days after Damien's departure, extra editions were scattered throughout the kingdom. The newspapers ran front pages about how effectively and quickly he suppressed the uprising after he finally made up his mind and entered Swanton, a place he had been secluded in Tisse.
In the process, it was also notable that he minimized violent suppression and skillfully reached an agreement with the citizens' representatives. Damien proposed an unconventional policy of maintaining the monarchy but including a certain number of citizens' representatives in the parliament.
The civic representative, who was well aware of the Duke's footsteps of marrying into the poor lower nobility and not hesitating to mingle with the middle class who were looked down upon because they had money but no title, recognized that the Duke of Tisse was the only person who could change the Swanton regime as it existed at least up to now.
It was also important that Damien was the only one who could protect the royal legitimacy while Johannes’s future was unclear. The fact that he could gather a strong military force while the nobles who still supported Johannes (although they were not in a position to speak out) was also a reassuring factor for the people.
“Things that had been unresolved for years have been resolved in less than two weeks since His Excellency left.”
“That’s right.”
“What should we do when my lord ascends to the throne? Should we all prepare to move to the Swanton Palace together?”
After Mrs. Dutton finished slicing the sandwich into strips, she raised her voice at the kitchen assistant.
“It seems like what you need to do now is to quickly deliver the sandwich to Madam before it dries out.”
“I’ll take it, Mrs. Dutton.”
When Margaret appeared, Mrs. Dutton nodded at her.
“Would you like that? I put in a lot of your favorite blueberry jam and cheese.”
"Thank you."
“How are madam?”
Margaret's expression turned awkward.
“There is no big change.”
Mrs. Dutton sighed and sipped her lemonade. The news that the mistress of the Tisse family had demanded a divorce had already spread throughout Birch Castle. Of course, upon hearing that the Duke of Tisse, who would never accept the demand, had ordered her not to leave Birch Castle, some of the servants looked away, not knowing what expression to make.
“Margaret, I don’t know about anyone else, but you know how much the Duke cares for Madam.”
Mrs. Dutton was the servant who had worked in the castle the longest since Eliza left.
“Some men are clumsy at expressing their feelings and make mistakes, but since I have been working in this castle, I have never seen so much butter, sugar, strawberries, and cream delivered to the bedroom. You two are clearly very much in love.”
Margaret nodded vaguely at her words and took the tray.
“I’ll go now before Madam waits.”
“Yes, that’s right. If you meet Mr. Paul on the way up, can you check with him about when the ingredients will arrive? They should have arrived two days ago. We’re almost out of flour, and everyone in the castle is going to starve.”
Margaret stopped walking as Mrs. Dutton raised her voice and wiped her hands on her apron.
“Oh, he said it was going to arrive this afternoon. It seems like the schedule within Tisse has been disrupted due to the prolonged railway strike.”
Margaret hurried out the back door of the castle, leaving Mrs. Dutton's complaints behind. She ran to the cottage to keep her sandwiches from drying out in the cold wind. Chloe was currently staying in a small cottage behind Birch Castle and hadn't stepped out.
It was not hard to understand the feelings of the hostess who was locked up in a space surrounded by things she had prepared for the baby. In fact, it was strange that the sadness she had suppressed for so long had not exploded sooner.
Priscilla, who returned to the castle after receiving the Duke's call, visited the cabin several times to try to comfort Chloe's heartbreak, but all attempts failed. There was no way to force Chloe out, who asked for a short time to mourn her dead child alone.
"Madam."
Chloe looked up as the door creaked open.
“Yeah. You came at a good time, Margaret.”
Chloe handed Margaret the letter that was lying on the table. Knowing that it was her only means of communication when she was unable to go outside, Margaret carefully placed the letter in her apron.
“I brought you food.”
As she opened the silver platter's lid, the food filling it up was revealed. Chloe smiled faintly.
“I asked for more, but Mrs. Dutton has big hands, after all.”
"Madam."
“Let’s sit down and eat together, Margaret.”
Margaret shook her head as if it were nonsense, looking at Chloe, who was calmly opening her mouth. Margaret stared at her for a moment and took a deep breath. Chloe noticed her anxiety and asked quietly.
“...Are you okay?”
Margaret, clenching her fists, finally opened her mouth as if she had made up her mind.
“Madam, a guest has come to see you.”
Chloe blinked quietly. She watched Margaret open the door to the cabin, look around, and finally whistle softly. Soon, an unexpected person appeared before her eyes.
"...Gray."
Margaret quickly confessed as she stood beside Gray as he entered the cabin.
“I just opened the back door leading outside the hunting grounds because he had something to tell you. If the caretaker or Mr. Paul were to pass by and find him, there would be trouble. If His Excellency the Duke found out, I would...”
“Thank you, Margaret.”
Chloe limped towards Margaret, who was at a loss, and took her hand affectionately.
"Thank you so much."
“I don’t have much time. Well, I’ll be back soon.”
Margaret gave Gray a small bow, opened the cabin door, and hurriedly disappeared. Chloe closed the door tightly, then approached Gray and squeezed his hands. Feeling his warm body temperature even in the winter, her eyes grew hot without warning.
“Wonderful, Gray. Like a priest from a foreign land.”
Chloe smiled at him with wet eyes. Gray looked at her and wrinkled his nose a little embarrassedly.
“The priest’s robe... is awkward.”
“No. It suits you well. Really.”
Chloe led him and sat him down on a small chair, then went to the stove and familiarly poured tea. Gray’s eyes darkened as he watched her withered back. Although he had heard a rough account of what had happened to her through Margaret, his heart felt even heavier when he saw her noticeably thin with his own eyes.
“Miss, are you okay?”
Chloe's shoulders flinched slightly as she turned around. Finally, she turned around and smiled brightly at Gray.
“Today is the best day I’ve had in months.”
Why do my tears flow when I see the young lady's smile? Gray could only hold both hands tightly as he watched her smile that seemed as if it would shatter like a faint light.
Uruk.
Chloe offered him some tea mixed with cream and sugar. Gray took a bite of the sandwich she offered without hesitation.
“If you’re worried, I’m not crazy, Gray.”
Margaret told him that Madame was locked in a room surrounded by her dead child's belongings and never went outside. She added that the Duchess had been going through a hard time after losing her child while treating the epidemic. But it seemed to Gray that Chloe was the only one who was having a hard time. The last Gray heard of the Duke was that he had entered the Swanton and was about to be crowned King.
“In fact, I can’t remember the last time my mind was this clear.”
“I know you’re not the type of person who will break down so easily.”
As Gray lowered his lips, Chloe looked at him with eyes full of affection. Gray knew how to comfort Chloe.
“Even if the world doesn’t know, I feel proud of myself because you know.”
“I can only imagine how hard it is for you to endure this.”
Chloe's lips trembled silently at Gray's softly caressing words. Chloe sipped her tea and quickly collected her expression.
“If I study the will of God, will I gain the skill to read people’s minds?”
“I indeed entered a monastery, but I never studied the will of God.”
“Really? I think you would have done well if you had studied. You would have probably done much better than Alice.”
Gray swallowed dryly as he looked at her laughing.
“Miss, do you know the decisive reason why I helped Miss Alice escape?”
“That must be because the child cried and clung to you in front of you.”
Of course, Alice had tearfully pleaded with Gray to speak out. But there was another decisive reason why Gray turned a blind eye to her escape.
“Miss Alice told me that she wanted to be happy.”
“...That was a very Alice-like appeal.”
A longing smile appeared on Chloe's face. Gray looked at her and spoke with trembling eyes.
“Miss Chloe. I can... do the same for you.”
As Chloe stared blankly at him, Gray continued speaking in a nervous voice.
“I thought about it for quite some time. If it would make the young lady happy, I thought it would be best not to open my mouth until I die, no matter what I heard or what I knew.”
Chloe's warm, brown eyes stared at Gray's rough hands shaking on the table.
“You must have had a hard time, Gray.”
A ragged breath escaped Gray's lips. This is why he sincerely wishes for Chloe's happiness. No matter what unfortunate situation he finds himself in, his heart aches at the tenderness with which he can think of others first.
“You have no idea what I found out, young lady.”
Gray's expression seemed to have returned to that of a ten-year-old who had been acting up in front of her, not knowing what to do. Chloe opened her mouth, carefully pushing a warm cup of tea in front of him, who had his lips pursed.
“I know that whatever it was, it was something that made you take the risk and come to me. And... I can guess what kind of story you heard.”
“The Duke of Tisse approached you with a clear purpose from the beginning.”
Chloe quietly put down her teacup as she listened to Gray's trembling voice. As the wind brushed her cheeks, the cold winter wind was cruel, and as she thought about how deeply Gray had agonized and hesitated as he came here alone, a corner of her heart grew warm.
“He knew in advance that there was gold buried in Verdier’s mountain, and he planned to propose to Miss Alice. A man named Count Cromwell planned to embroil Miss Alice in a scandal. Even if Miss Alice had not run away, Verdier would have been in trouble anyway, Miss.”
Ah, but Count Cromwell seemed like a good guy. A bitter smile appeared on Chloe's lips as she confirmed through Gray's mouth one thing about Damien's plan that she had not known about.
“You’re not really... surprised.”
Gray immediately noticed her calm reaction. Chloe nodded and tried to smile, but she couldn't help but feel her lips tremble.
“There is no secret in this world that can be hidden forever.”
“That’s not all.”
There was a small surge of excitement in Gray's voice. Chloe opened her mouth before he could suffer the pain of telling his story.
“It was a truly clever and cruel thing to make me a suspect in the Marchioness’s murder.”
“...Do you really think you forgave him even though you knew all that?”
Chloe let out a deep breath in front of Gray, who had an expression of disbelief on his face. Her lowered eyes blinked slowly.
“I hated him so much I couldn’t stand it. But isn’t it strange? I didn’t hate the child. Even though I hated Tisse’s name so much, I wanted to pass it on to my child. I guess I’m just a hopeless materialistic person.”
Gray whispered softly to her as she wiped the tears from her eyes with a handkerchief.
“Don’t say that. The young lady just wanted to protect her precious one.”
“Yeah. It’s all over now.”
He squeezed Chloe's hand as she tried to smile. He felt sorry for the girl who always had to endure and bear everything on her own. But it was also a shame that he couldn't do anything for her.
“Is it impossible for you to start over with me?”
Chloe looked at Gray with slightly surprised eyes. The way he lowered his gaze, unable to meet hers, showed just how much courage it took for him to say those words.
“The monastery sponsored by the House of Count Weiss was actually a secret meeting place for those who supported the Duke of Tisse. Just by keeping an ear open there, I could learn about how the world was going. So I saved up my salary and invested it in a trading company in the Duchy of Carter. I borrowed the name of a nobleman who is no longer in use.”
“That’s great, Gray.”
Chloe smiled genuinely at him.
“It was something anyone could do.”
“No. It was something I could do because it was you.”
Gray whispered softly, his eyes reddening and his breathing heavy.
“It was natural that I could not worship God in the monastery. I knew that it would be a sin for me, a person of humble birth, to dare to... harbor such feelings toward a noble lady.”
Chloe quietly reached out and caressed his hand. The tip of Gray's soft voice trembled faintly.
“Living my life waiting for a single ray of warm kindness from you, like sunshine, is drying me up to death.”
“...”
“I’ve become so greedy now that I can’t stand it anymore.”
“Don’t cry, Gray.”
“Please run away with me... Ugh...”
Tears flowed down Gray's face, which still retained the boyish aura. Chloe carefully handed him the handkerchief she had been using and finally opened her mouth.
“Thank you, Gray.”
“...”
“I will never forget it until I die. I will live forever, never forgetting this moment when you, risking your life, came here and told me to run away. If I become a chatty old lady, I will brag to the kind and grateful people who listen to my stories. I had this kind of romance, too. People who risked everything to come and confess their love...”
Chloe swallowed dryly and forced a smile through her wet eyes.
“There really was a good man...”
Gray's brown face turned completely red. Chloe's rejection was so typical of her. How could her rejection be so gentle and affectionate? Would it be possible to give up on her and live on?
“The tea has cooled down. I’ll give you some more.”
It was when Chloe took a deep breath and got up from her seat, and headed towards the stove.
“Can I never be gone?”
Gray, who grabbed her shoulder as she moved away without realizing it, sobbed in a wet voice. He couldn’t hold her tightly, and he couldn’t even touch her properly, as if he were touching a piece of craftsmanship that he was afraid would break, but his precious feelings were completely conveyed to Chloe.
"Gray."
Chloe slowly turned around and stood facing him on her uneasy legs. She smoothed the messy hair on his forehead, then spoke softly but clearly.
“It’s not that you can’t do it, it’s that I can’t do it.”
“Because I am of lowly status?”
"No."
Chloe shook her head with a clear expression. Ever since she set foot in Tisse, the dignity of nobility had long been an illusion to her.
"Sure?"
“Because you deserve a good girl who can give you her whole heart.”
Gray knew the weight of Chloe's words.
“I don’t care about anything.”
“Of course it is. But I’m not the type of person who can do that.”
The girl Gray fell in love with was someone who answered his sincerity with sincerity. Gray realized anew that Chloe's kindness could make him so sad.
“If I rely on your good intentions now, I will have to live my whole life feeling guilty towards you. You, who see me like that, will never be able to be happy either. Because...”
Chloe paused for a moment, then whispered.
“Because you are not the kind of person who can oppress someone and keep them by your side.”
He may never learn, and will never know, how to force another person's feelings on them and make them his own.
“Let me ask you one last question.”
“What is that?”
“If only I had confessed to you a little sooner... before all this happened...”
Gray swallowed dryly as his throat got clogged. Chloe listened to him with difficulty as he spoke.
“Would the outcome have been different if that had happened?”
Warm gazes collided in the air.
“What if you told me to leave everything behind and run away with you?”
"Yes."
Chloe and Gray both knew when that time was. It was the night Chloe had decided to go to the Duke of Tisse, right after Alice had run away. It was a summer night when the morning dew clung to the grass. She still had no idea about the Duke’s hidden plans.
“Perhaps my answer would have been the same as today.”
Gray finally nodded, his face completely wet.
“I knew you would say that.”
“Gray, you know. I always thought you had a personality similar to mine.”
“...In what way?”
“In that they are people who want to protect the other person’s world rather than destroy it.”
Gray wiped his tears with the back of his hand and smiled. It was his good fortune to have met someone like the woman before him even once in his life.
“Promise me one thing, miss.”
“What is it?”
Outside, Margaret knocked, signaling that someone was coming to check on the Duchess' safety.
“I really hope you are happy, Miss. For my sake, at least.”
“Yeah. You just remember this one thing.”
Chloe spoke clearly as she opened the cabin door.
“Whatever choice I make, I do it of my own free will.”
“...I will keep that in mind.”
“I’ll be happy, Gray.”
Gray finally turned around after taking one last look at Chloe's face, which was still smiling brightly. As soon as he disappeared into the grass, she saw the butler, Paul, walking towards her from a distance, dragging a box of coal. Chloe stood with her hands on the hard wooden wall and took a deep breath.
This is all I have to do in this world.
The train, which had been packed from Swanton to the freight car, was packed. The gentleman sitting among the crowd of the cheapest third-class passengers looked like a person of high status, but no one thought it was strange. They just thought he was some unlucky nobleman who couldn't get a first-class seat despite his money because of the prolonged railway strike.
“Where are you going, my lord?”
“Isn’t this the final destination?”
When the gentleman with his hat pulled down asked briefly, the short man who had spoken gave an awkward smile.
“Ah, that’s right. I guess you live in Tisse. The people of Tisse territory must be very excited to hear that His Excellency the Duke has become King.”
When the gentleman did not respond, the man sitting next to him quickly found another topic.
“I’m a phonograph dealer. I travel all over the kingdom, selling phonographs. Have you heard of it, my lord? It’s a machine that plays music. When my mother first saw it, she was so frightened that she thought she had seen an evil spirit. Of course, now she’s demanding that I bring her more music.”
The man continued speaking, his voice rising.
“Now that the royal family, who had been suffering from headaches, has stabilized, isn’t this a time of true peace? In times like these, what the people seek is romance. Imagine being able to hear the performance of Julian Wyatt, who is praised for his devilish talent, in your own home.”
“Are you trying to sell to me now?”
“Oh, no. My lord, you can see his performance from the front row. Even people like us can listen to his music, at least on the gramophone. I’m just saying.”
The man added sheepishly, scratching his chubby cheek, where his red beard had grown thickly.
“If Duke Tisse... no, His Majesty the King were to hear this, he would laugh at it, wouldn’t he?”
The train, which had been passing through the birch forest, was now entering its final destination, Tisse Station. The gentleman suddenly asked the man who was packing his bag.
“Why do you think he would laugh?”
“Aren’t there many people who do businesses that are much more profitable than this?”
“Do you have Julian’s music too?”
A man whose small suit looked like it was about to burst spoke in a broken voice, hugging a heavy bag.
“That’s... I have no way of contacting you. I tried to ask the nobles I have connections with, but I was turned away.”
The man's eyes widened silently as the gentleman took out a checkbook from inside his coat. Could it be that the sale was successful? The gentleman took out a fountain pen and glanced at him, asking in a dry voice.
“How much does a gramophone cost?”
Underneath the brim of his hat, the man who had seen the gentleman’s face for the first time swallowed dry saliva involuntarily, feeling nervous. It was a great face, but the gaze that was looking straight at him made his legs tremble even though he had done nothing wrong.
“Tch, seven thousand five hundred sekels. You have no idea how much I ran around trying to meet this price.”
“Isn’t the price still too high for an average household?”
The red-bearded man clenched his jaw as the gentleman asked the man who was emphasizing that he was absolutely not being ripped off just because he was a noble. In fact, not many people would buy a gramophone, which had been treated as a recorder or a child's toy, for listening to music. He couldn't honestly say that he had to sell it at a high price, even if he sold one, because he had to make enough money to feed his family. The gentleman glanced at his embarrassed expression and wrote down the amount on the check.
“I’ll give you Julian’s address, so meet him in person and try to persuade him. Then send him the gramophone and his music along with it.”
The man froze for a moment, dumbfounded by the tremendous opportunity presented by the gentleman before him.
“Is it too much?”
“That... that can’t be true, my lord!”
The train came to a screeching halt. The gentleman handed the man the check and added one last word.
“If I may give you a word of advice, you should have more confidence and faith in what you are doing, before everyone else rushes in and easily follows the path you have paved.”
The gentleman who opened the guest room door disappeared faster than anyone else. The man quickly put on his glasses and held up the check to the light to check its authenticity, wondering if the gentleman had been teasing him.
“Julian Wyatt’s address. Is this true?”
The man's eyes widened as he looked at the beautifully handwritten letters. This was because he had noticed the signature next to the seal with a birch tree drawn on it.
Things go to the royal family.
Damien Ernst von Tise
The man hurriedly put the check into the inside pocket of his tight jacket, afraid that someone might see it.
“Aren’t you going to get off?”
The other passengers who had woken up looked at him strangely and winked. The man blinked and then hit his cheek hard with his hand. It didn’t hurt, whether it was a dream or reality.
Damien walked quickly through the crowds that filled the hall to the horse storage area. Weiss had said he would bring the Duchess himself, but he couldn't wait until then. He had to make sure everything was right before the coronation.
“Stop pushing. Are you planning on knocking the old man down?”
A sharp voice reached his ear. Damien turned his head at the familiar voice and saw Eliza standing a little way away from him. She seemed to be boarding the last train to Winsbury via Swanton.
“Come here...!”
Eliza was seen holding the hand of her attendant and helping her board the train. The small old woman seemed to be her mother, who lived in Winsbury. Thanks to Chloe's good recommendation, she was living well with her family despite her great injustice in Tisse.
“Take care!!!”
Before Eliza, who was shouting at the back of his old mother's head, could find him, Damien quickly turned around. In this situation, where he was practically being pushed by the crowd, there was nothing good in having his identity revealed.
When he returned to the castle, he thought it might be a good idea to bring up Eliza's story to Chloe to start a conversation. He wasn't particularly interested in the old servant's well-being. He was just sure that his wife, who had a particularly close bond with the servants, would be pleased.
“The train to Winsbury is leaving soon!”
Amid the huge crowd, the stationmaster blew his whistle until his face turned red.
“The last train to Winsbury via Swanton! Hurry up and get on board!”
Damien hurried out of the station, pushing past the crowd of people who were swarming in. There was no time to waste here. The letter from Chloe was neatly folded and stored in his clothes.
To my dear Duke
After you left, I thought a lot on my own and realized something.
That I've been acting like a child and sacrificing you for my sorrow.
Even though I know it is a needless worry, I am writing this because I am worried that I might cause Your Excellency to miss out on something you have so desperately wanted to do.
Please finish everything safely and bring it back to you. Show that my father's regret at not being able to send me to the palace was not in vain.
Because you are the only one who can prove it to me.
I love you, Damien.
I sincerely hope that I have not become your weakness.
From Chloe, who is looking forward to the changed world you will create.
It didn't matter whether the teardrop-stained letter was her true heart or a ploy to get to the Supreme Court in Swanton with divorce papers. The task of life had been completed, and now all that was left for Damien to do was to give Chloe the Queen's crown and confess to her. To me, the sun of this country, you are the only one forever. Our child can now be born without any worries.
Given Chloe's personality, it would be impossible for her to completely forget the past. But Damien staked everything on the fact that she admitted that she loved him.
He will gently caress Chloe's frozen heart for a very long time and eventually melt it. It was in this context that he showed impulsive generosity to the phonograph businessman he met by chance on the train. In the most beautiful bedroom of the Rose Palace, which will now be the royal palace, he will listen to the passionate music of Julian Wyatt that captivated her, and his even more passionate breathing will make her small lips burst open.
Even if the beginning was wrong, it was impossible to erase the memories they had made together. It meant that they could not deny the moments when they exchanged affectionate glances, the times when they poured out their true feelings mixed with desire.
Chloe, you and I can start over now.
A dense birch forest with gray-brown trees, each raising its head upwards. A train with a loud whistle began to move southward, belching black smoke. A smile appeared on Damien's face as he rode away quickly in the opposite direction of the train.
“Just like when I was young... You picked a bunch of blue forget-me-nots by the river... and gave them to me... Gulp...”
“Don't talk.”
“She... hugged me.”
Chloe's lips, dry and white from all the moisture, turned upwards in a smile. As he watched her smiling face, sweating profusely and writhing in pain, Damien vividly felt a fire rising inside him. It felt as if the embers of anger growing in his stomach would burn his entire body.
“It’s a similar color to your eyes... I wonder what color our child’s eyes will be... whether they’ll be the same as yours... or will they resemble me...”
She gasped for breath.
“Did my mother tell you...?”
Damien couldn't listen any longer. He approached her, who was confusing dreams with reality, and opened the bottle.
“We’ll have to get ourselves out of the way first to check that out, Chloe.”
Damien, who was supporting Chloe's back and helping her up, felt a hot lava-like anger bursting out of his chest. Her skinny body was as heavy as a feather, not much different from a pillow. Her body, sagging, suddenly turned her head and asked him.
“What kind of... medicine is that?”
“Drink.”
As Damien held the vial with his mouth shut, Chloe instinctively jerked her head to the side. Damien muttered softly as he watched her tremble like a deer at the sound of a gunshot.
“You have to drink, Chloe.”
"...no, I do not want."
Chloe's eyes, noticing the situation, returned to focus. Damien chewed his lips and muttered quietly.
“I hope I don’t force you to take it. And if I hear that sound coming out of your mouth one more time, you’ll be forced to take this medicine.”
“I won’t give my child any medicine that would be harmful to him.”
“If you don’t drink this, you’ll die.”
Chloe's dry lips let out a self-deprecating whisper. Her head shook violently from side to side.
“I can't do that.”
“No. You have to do that.”
“...I can’t do it.”
A beastly growl came out of Damien's teeth.
“Do you think that a Duchess has to die before completing a year of married life?”
Chloe, who had been avoiding eye contact, turned her head and glared at him. Chloe's face turned pale, and her eyes sparkled.
“How could you directly inject poison into our child and kill him!!!”
Her eyes, which looked as if she would collapse at any moment, flashed like a madman. Damien thought that was better. He was relieved that she, who couldn't tell the difference between dreams and reality and who seemed like she would leave the world at any moment, came to her senses and screamed.
“Think carefully, Chloe. If you don’t take this medicine, there’s a high probability that you’ll be reunited with your mother in heaven. Your chances of survival are extremely slim.”
“If I take this medicine, my child will die.”
“The sample size is too small to be sure. You know that, right?”
Damien didn't miss the flickering of Chloe's eyes. He held her confused gaze tightly.
“Wake up and think calmly. There are definitely people who took this medicine and didn’t have premature births. Their children were born without any problems. But what if you die before that? You’re basically not giving the child in your womb a chance to be born.”
“Ugh...”
Tears flowed from Chloe's sunken eyes. Damien looked straight at her, holding the tears that were continuously falling from the tip of her chin in his hand.
“The child of Tisse will never die.”
Chloe's hunched shoulders trembled slightly. Her dry lips were wet with tears, and she let out a thin sob or a whisper.
“Ah, ah... baby... ah...”
“You can think of it as the last. Trust me, Chloe. This is the only way for everyone to survive.”
Chloe tried to take the vial from Damien's hand, but her hands were shaking too much. Damien grabbed her hand and brought the vial to her lips. Chloe's brown eyes met his gaze.
Emotions flashed through her bloodshot eyes. As if she were reproaching him, yet still wanting to rely on a ray of hope. As soon as the medicine entered her lips, which were clearly showing her pain, she spat it out. Her head accepted it, but her whole body rejected it. Damien chewed his lips as he watched Chloe sobbing and chattering her teeth.
Shit.
He downed the bottle in one gulp and then put his face against Chloe's. The desperate sobs were transmitted through their lips. Damien looked straight into Chloe's eyes and swallowed her bursting sorrow. He held onto her tightly as she bit her lip and struggled, breathing fierce life into her.
I have never failed you, and I will not fail you again. I will make you happy enough to forget all your pain, so please live. Chloe.
***
Chloe, who had passed out after taking the medicine, hovered between life and death for two days. Her fever began to subside when her bleeding stopped. The servants of the Duke felt relief for the Duchess, who had overcome the epidemic and survived, as well as pity for her child, who had been so tragically lost.
“Are you okay, ma’am?”
“Please keep counting.”
Mrs. Dutton sighed as she stirred the bread dough.
“Getting absorbed in something is just to forget something.”
“You’re so normal, it’s almost strange.”
Margaret lowered her voice slightly, looking worried. Mrs. Dutton sighed deeply and blinked.
“When I see the laundry maid changing the wet pillowcases every day, I can imagine how the madam feels, and my heart aches.”
“I wish she would express her anger or sadness instead.”
“Seeing that she has to be formal even in times like this, I don’t know if the life of a nobleman is all that great.”
As the butler appeared, the two people who had been talking shut their mouths. Paul looked at them and warned them with a stern expression.
“Margaret, when do you plan on bringing the tea out to the drawing room?”
“Now.”
Margaret, carrying a silver tray, hurried out of the kitchen and headed to the drawing room. Chloe was looking out the window in the drawing room, lost in thought.
"Madam."
“...Margaret.”
Chloe noticed the presence of people belatedly and turned her head.
“Aren’t you cold? Would you like some more coal?”
“Would you do that?”
Chloe looked at her with a faint smile. After losing her child to the pandemic, Chloe felt a different wall than before. Of course, it would be strange for a person not to change after going through such a big thing, but Margaret felt a little regretful.
"Madam."
"Yes."
“If there is anything I can do, please tell me so I can do it. Not only I, but all the servants of this castle think so too. Of course... You are the mistress of this castle.”
“You are a very good person, Margaret.”
Chloe continued speaking softly to her.
“When I collapsed, you stayed by my side and nursed me without sleeping. I didn’t even get to properly thank you for taking the risk.”
“I am your dedicated maid. I just did what was expected of me.”
“There is nothing in the world that should be done naturally.”
There is only sincerity. Margaret, who felt a little choked up in front of Chloe, who was whispering softly, wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.
“I worked as a kitchen maid, and all I heard was nagging about where I was spending my time. If you have time to wake up at the crack of dawn and do your hair, you should learn how to bake a pie properly.”
“I liked the way you were always dressed. Even at the most formal balls at the Swanton, I never saw a lady with her hair done as nicely as yours. So I thought you would be the perfect person to help me out on my day.”
Margaret blinked quickly twice, then closed her reddened eyes and smiled.
“Just let me know when you’re ready to go to the Swanton.”
This winter has been a time of turmoil not only in Tisse but also throughout the kingdom. The fact that word of the troubles in Swanton had spread to this place made it clear that the situation was serious. It had been a week since Mrs. Dutton complained that the railway strike was causing difficulties in transporting food.
Johannes, who had fled to the outskirts while the epidemic was spreading in Tisse, returned to the palace when the situation calmed down and held a hasty coronation ceremony with only a few high-ranking clergy. Disappointed citizens were dissatisfied with the King, who was only concerned with his own survival rather than trying to calm the epidemic situation, and telegrams were sent to the Duke every day. Margaret, a mere maid, noticed that something was serious and that the Duke had to leave for Swanto right away, and Chloe could not have been unaware.
“I want to go see the theater soon, too.”
As Margaret smiled brightly, Chloe faced her.
“You haven’t given up on your dream of becoming an actress, have you?”
“Can someone like me, who has no numbers, become an actor?”
“I will cheer you on from the front row of the stage where you are the main character.”
“I know when that day will come.”
As Margaret smiled shyly, the Duke's footsteps were heard through the door.
"Then, if you need anything, please call me."
As the maid quietly left after putting down the tea, silence fell over the spacious living room. Chloe quietly turned her gaze to Damien, who was sitting on the single sofa to her right, and poured the tea. Gulp. Hot water dripped into the fancy teacup, and the fragrant scent of the tea wafted to her nose.
“Once your body is somewhat stable, it would be better to leave for Swan.”
“Yes. Sure.”
Damien remained silent for a moment as Chloe answered obediently. Chloe smiled slightly at Damien, who was looking at her with suspicious eyes.
“It was midwinter when I first came here, and it’s winter when I leave here too.”
“...”
“I think I’ll remember Tisse as winter.”
It seemed to imply something. Damien stared at her intently and opened his mouth.
“You’ve definitely experienced all four seasons of Tisse. Winter seems to be the most memorable.”
“Yes.”
Chloe tilted her teacup, looking straight at him.
“It was terribly long.”
A light flashed silently in Damien’s eyes. Crack. There was a faint sound of the stacked logs collapsing inside the fireplace. Chloe filled her empty teacup with graceful hands, then turned her head out the window where the winter sunlight was shining. Her eyes narrowed as she looked at the landscape of the backyard, where the gray birch trees were covered in snow.
“Thank goodness. Swanton’s winter won’t be as long as Tisse’s.”
“You’ll eventually overthrow the King and take his place, right?”
“Unless something unexpected happens.”
Chloe knew that he had to leave for Swanton as soon as possible. It had been a month since she had recovered from her illness. In the meantime, Count Weiss had visited Birch Castle twice and had long conversations with the Duke.
“Even though Lord Brown told me I was over the edge, why didn’t you leave for Swanton?”
Damien answered Chloe's soft question briefly.
"Because I didn't want to."
"So, I'm asking why you, Your Excellency, didn't want to do it."
Chloe's voice was slightly higher than usual. She continued before Damien, who furrowed his brows slightly, could answer.
“Was it because you felt guilty about the Duke killing my child?”
Her brown eyes looked straight at him.
“Or was it to play the role of a loving husband in front of people?”
Chloe didn’t stop talking even as she watched Damien’s face harden.
“Or were you afraid that I would commit suicide and disgrace the great Tisde family?”
“Chloe von Tisse.”
“Don’t call me by that name!!!”
As Chloe gasped for breath, the butler nearby looked at her in surprise.
“Master, madam. Whatever happens...”
“Close the door and let no one come near until I call.”
At Damien’s low command, the door to the reception room was firmly shut.
“Answer my question.”
“Do you really want to hear the answer?”
Chloe grimaced as she looked at Damien, who was looking at her with a cold face. She wanted to return the favor to the person who had been spewing arrow-like questions at her every day.
“Yes. I don’t intend to believe every lie that comes out of your mouth anyway.”
“I guess we’ll have to postpone going to Swanton. You need stability now.”
“No. I’m ready to go to Swanton.”
Chloe cut Damien off and lifted her head. She spoke the words she had been preparing for quite some time.
“We need to hurry if we want to file divorce papers at Swanton’s court before you become king.”
“Divorce?”
His expression changed completely. He lifted his lips up crookedly as if he had heard a very funny story, but it was impossible not to know that it was an expression of anger. Chloe looked straight into his eyes, blazing with anger, and continued.
“Yes.”
“Who the hell is talking about divorce?”
“I remember what you said before. We only have one child and there won’t be any more. With no heirs, divorce is a given.”
“Chloe, you’re not so stupid as to not think about being flexible when circumstances change.”
Chloe's clenched fist trembled at Damien's sharp rebuke. If he knew how much his words that this would be the first and last pregnancy had burdened her, he shouldn't have said such things now. If he knew how much she cherished the child, he shouldn't have laughed at her by talking about 'flexible thinking'. After all, Chloe had come to know that everything surrounding her was a lie, and the child was the only truth she could rely on.
“You tricked me until the very end and pushed me over the edge. You made me test the child. I shouldn’t have taken that medicine, in the end I... I...!”
“If you hadn’t taken that medicine, you would have died.”
“Then you should have just let me die!!!”
Chloe shed hot tears, her veins rising on her slender neck. As she gasped for breath and clutched her chest, Damien came closer and met her eyes. Looking directly into her eyes, Damien whispered bitterly.
“Let me answer the question I asked you earlier. The reason I forced you to take that drug was to save you. Because I love you so much, Chloe. After all the hard work I put into having you, you can’t leave me so soon, right?”
Chloe's body trembled.
“You are not worthy of mentioning love.”
“You have no right to judge my feelings either. This is the love I make, Chloe von Tisse.”
“I never wanted that kind of love.”
Chloe spat out sharply through her teeth. She wanted to hurt him. She wanted his heart to be torn to shreds, just like hers.
“Is that really so?”
Damien whispered wickedly, holding her gaze.
“Can you guarantee that I am not in your head, in your soul?”
Why did God give the devil such a beautiful face and a three-inch tongue? Why did he make her believe his words of love?
“That was until I saw your dirty secret one stormy night.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Chloe. That’s not such a big secret to me. If it were, I wouldn’t have forgotten that I even put it there. If it was such a big secret, I would have burned it all down to ashes the moment you confessed your love to me.”
Chloe's eyes filled with tears, and she trembled.
“Don’t you have any shame?”
“It might be so for those who swore to become one before God.”
“How can you be so confident when everything about your marriage was a lie?”
“I said I could explain everything from beginning to end, but you were the one who refused. You were the one who blocked your ears and closed your eyes to avoid seeing the truth.”
“You’ve had more than your fair share of opportunities. You’ve had... so many opportunities to tell me the truth.”
Chloe thought back to the countless nights and days she had spent with him. She felt something hot burst inside her as the happy moments she had melted into his secret gaze as he looked at her flashed through her mind. She truly loved Damien. She felt nauseous as she remembered what she had done to please him, to see those beautiful lips turn up in an arc as they looked at her.
“Did it ever occur to you, even a little bit, that you should tell me the truth, since I gave you everything because I loved you?”
Even at the moment when he put his hands in her hair and moaned on the bed, even at the moment when he touched her cheeks full of himself and the veins on his arms stood out, Damien ran only towards his own desires, not caring about her true feelings.
“Why should I do that?”
His voice cracked, leaving Chloe speechless. Goosebumps ran down Chloe's skin as if windows had shattered everywhere, as if the temperature in the room had dropped completely.
“Why should I plant a single ray of anxiety in your eyes that adore me?”
Damien's lips twisted and distorted.
“I wasn’t stupid enough to leave you alone, dammit.”
Chloe could sense his anger clearly. And it was painfully clear to her that there was only one reason he was angry right now. Damien was angry right now at the very situation where a 'small' thing he had carelessly forgotten had snowballed into something bigger.
“I admit my mistake, so now I’m making sure you’re never out of my sight.”
Chloe's eyes shook with despair as she heard the real reason why he didn't leave for Swanton.
“You have no right to reject me, Chloe.”
“Please let me go.”
“The word divorce will never exist in my life. It won’t exist in yours either.”
“...So are you saying we should continue this empty marriage until we die?”
Damien smiled at Chloe, who asked with a dejected face.
“Remember that this tedious winter you spoke of will end someday. Don’t make the mistake of kicking away the paradise that will unfold before your eyes because you can’t stand this time.”
Chloe closed her eyes silently, speechless. Then Damien ran his hand down the back of her neck, savoring it.
“I love you.”
Chloe slowly opened her closed eyes. The man who had whispered words of love to her with his beautiful face that captivated others slowly approached her and kissed her. The light kiss soon changed into a deep kiss with clear intentions. At the end of Damian’s gaze, looking at Chloe’s wet lips, a flame of desire burned.
“You just...”
Damien's knees slowly touched the floor. The two hands that were rolling up her skirt slowly took control of her. The morning sunlight reflected off Damien's dazzling blond hair, and for a moment, he looked almost holy. Chloe whispered softly, gasping for breath.
“It’s good that I move according to your will.”
“...Maybe so.”
Damien did not deny it. Chloe's green dress hem spread out on the gorgeous red sofa. Chloe's eyes, looking down at Damien's dazzling blond hair, were blurred and wet. Her skin flushed red as he wanted, and her vocal cords continuously emitted moans and whimpers as he stimulated them.
“But you love me like this.”
As Chloe's handprints spread across the velvet sofa, Damien's hand clasped around hers. Chloe sobbed like a completely captured prey. Maybe Damien was right. Maybe she still loved him.
“Face what’s important, Chloe. Don’t make stupid choices in a moment of anger that lead you to give up what’s most important, my love.”
As she trembled at the pleasure that Damien poured out, Chloe thought, what she wanted from him was a sincere apology. And she realized with a bitterness that she would never get what she wanted again. The last ray of hope she had held onto was completely gone.
“Yes, I love you. It just happened that way.”
Damien's lips drew a satisfied curve at the tearful words that fell from her mouth. Chloe added to him.
“And I regret it deeply.”
“Time will heal everything. Trust me, Chloe.”
Chloe closed her eyes as she listened to Damien's voice whispering affectionately. Chloe had once told him with certainty that she could not love someone who could not forgive.
But when she could no longer forgive someone she had already fallen in love with, she didn't know what to do. Of all the people she had truly loved, none had ever made her so desperate. Even when Alice left home without a word, she didn't hate her. Even when her father brought the family to the brink of bankruptcy, she felt more regret than resentment.
“Is there any other woman who can make me kneel besides you?”
Damien, kneeling between her legs, did not look shabby, but rather the opposite. At this moment, he was the one holding her breath and continuing the hunt until the end. Chloe bit her lip as she exhaled rapidly.
"Ha..."
Now she vaguely knew. When she could not forgive the person she loved, what decision would she make? No, maybe she already knew. Maybe she had been postponing that moment, or hiding behind her love, giving herself a reason not to leave him until the very end.
“Ahh. Chloe. You’re so sweet.”
Damien's voice was filled with joy. It was as if he were appreciating a work of art he had created.
“It’s only natural that all my shame, prostrating myself like a dog in front of you, would disappear.”
Damien must know that Chloe's shame is reaching its limit as he whispers, enjoying her reaction.
Long tears fell from Chloe's eyes. She could no longer avoid them. Chloe Verdier was not a person who could hold love and hate in the same heart. She had already expected that they would not be able to part beautifully. Her legs, which were on Damien's shoulders, clenched tightly and trembled.
Only when the butler came running into the living room did Damien raise his face while slowly lowering her skirt.
"What?"
Chloe took her breath away as she stared at the fireplace, trying to look away while Damien took off his cravat and cleaned his face.
“I apologize, my lord. An urgent message has arrived from Count Weiss’s men.”
The fact that the butler had barged into a place where the owner had forbidden entry without warning meant that the matter was not trivial. Damien silently accepted the letter he had been handed. It was Weiss's own handwriting, written in a hurry.
“I need to get ready to leave for Swanton right away.”
“Is there something urgent, Master?”
Damien opened his mouth with a stern expression in response to the butler's question.
“They say the citizens rioted. Mobs of people gathered sporadically from all over the city and burned down the royal villa in one day.”
The telegram said that Johannes was currently missing and that the royal army was in disarray due to the King's absence. Someone was needed to take command of the situation as soon as possible.
Damien took a deep breath. A new era had already begun. He was the one who would eventually get everything he wanted, one way or another.
“You will guard the Duchess here until everything is sorted out.”
“Please let me go too. I’m so confused, I want to be alone.”
Damien looked into Chloe's eyes as she opened her mouth with a trembling voice, then shook his head.
“A woman who is to become a Queen should not go to the church in person with divorce papers.”
“...I won’t do that.”
Chloe opened her eyes wide and whispered. And Damien knew. The truth was hidden in her wavering eyes. No. You can't fool me, Chloe.
Damien's pleas were useless. Damien, at a loss, gave orders in a low voice to the butler, who kept his mouth shut.
“Until I give my permission, do not let the Duchess leave this castle even one step.”
“Damien.”
Chloe looked at him in disbelief, but Damien didn't budge.
“Don’t forget to be extra vigilant, as my wife may become neurotic in confusing situations.”
Paul, the butler, was also embarrassed.
“Then what about the events inside and outside the territory...”
“Send word to Lady Priscilla immediately and have her come to Birch Castle, and leave external affairs to my mother.”
“Damien!!!”
His back, walking away without looking back, disappeared from Chloe's sight.
***
For several days after Damien's departure, extra editions were scattered throughout the kingdom. The newspapers ran front pages about how effectively and quickly he suppressed the uprising after he finally made up his mind and entered Swanton, a place he had been secluded in Tisse.
In the process, it was also notable that he minimized violent suppression and skillfully reached an agreement with the citizens' representatives. Damien proposed an unconventional policy of maintaining the monarchy but including a certain number of citizens' representatives in the parliament.
The civic representative, who was well aware of the Duke's footsteps of marrying into the poor lower nobility and not hesitating to mingle with the middle class who were looked down upon because they had money but no title, recognized that the Duke of Tisse was the only person who could change the Swanton regime as it existed at least up to now.
It was also important that Damien was the only one who could protect the royal legitimacy while Johannes’s future was unclear. The fact that he could gather a strong military force while the nobles who still supported Johannes (although they were not in a position to speak out) was also a reassuring factor for the people.
“Things that had been unresolved for years have been resolved in less than two weeks since His Excellency left.”
“That’s right.”
“What should we do when my lord ascends to the throne? Should we all prepare to move to the Swanton Palace together?”
After Mrs. Dutton finished slicing the sandwich into strips, she raised her voice at the kitchen assistant.
“It seems like what you need to do now is to quickly deliver the sandwich to Madam before it dries out.”
“I’ll take it, Mrs. Dutton.”
When Margaret appeared, Mrs. Dutton nodded at her.
“Would you like that? I put in a lot of your favorite blueberry jam and cheese.”
"Thank you."
“How are madam?”
Margaret's expression turned awkward.
“There is no big change.”
Mrs. Dutton sighed and sipped her lemonade. The news that the mistress of the Tisse family had demanded a divorce had already spread throughout Birch Castle. Of course, upon hearing that the Duke of Tisse, who would never accept the demand, had ordered her not to leave Birch Castle, some of the servants looked away, not knowing what expression to make.
“Margaret, I don’t know about anyone else, but you know how much the Duke cares for Madam.”
Mrs. Dutton was the servant who had worked in the castle the longest since Eliza left.
“Some men are clumsy at expressing their feelings and make mistakes, but since I have been working in this castle, I have never seen so much butter, sugar, strawberries, and cream delivered to the bedroom. You two are clearly very much in love.”
Margaret nodded vaguely at her words and took the tray.
“I’ll go now before Madam waits.”
“Yes, that’s right. If you meet Mr. Paul on the way up, can you check with him about when the ingredients will arrive? They should have arrived two days ago. We’re almost out of flour, and everyone in the castle is going to starve.”
Margaret stopped walking as Mrs. Dutton raised her voice and wiped her hands on her apron.
“Oh, he said it was going to arrive this afternoon. It seems like the schedule within Tisse has been disrupted due to the prolonged railway strike.”
Margaret hurried out the back door of the castle, leaving Mrs. Dutton's complaints behind. She ran to the cottage to keep her sandwiches from drying out in the cold wind. Chloe was currently staying in a small cottage behind Birch Castle and hadn't stepped out.
It was not hard to understand the feelings of the hostess who was locked up in a space surrounded by things she had prepared for the baby. In fact, it was strange that the sadness she had suppressed for so long had not exploded sooner.
Priscilla, who returned to the castle after receiving the Duke's call, visited the cabin several times to try to comfort Chloe's heartbreak, but all attempts failed. There was no way to force Chloe out, who asked for a short time to mourn her dead child alone.
"Madam."
Chloe looked up as the door creaked open.
“Yeah. You came at a good time, Margaret.”
Chloe handed Margaret the letter that was lying on the table. Knowing that it was her only means of communication when she was unable to go outside, Margaret carefully placed the letter in her apron.
“I brought you food.”
As she opened the silver platter's lid, the food filling it up was revealed. Chloe smiled faintly.
“I asked for more, but Mrs. Dutton has big hands, after all.”
"Madam."
“Let’s sit down and eat together, Margaret.”
Margaret shook her head as if it were nonsense, looking at Chloe, who was calmly opening her mouth. Margaret stared at her for a moment and took a deep breath. Chloe noticed her anxiety and asked quietly.
“...Are you okay?”
Margaret, clenching her fists, finally opened her mouth as if she had made up her mind.
“Madam, a guest has come to see you.”
Chloe blinked quietly. She watched Margaret open the door to the cabin, look around, and finally whistle softly. Soon, an unexpected person appeared before her eyes.
"...Gray."
Margaret quickly confessed as she stood beside Gray as he entered the cabin.
“I just opened the back door leading outside the hunting grounds because he had something to tell you. If the caretaker or Mr. Paul were to pass by and find him, there would be trouble. If His Excellency the Duke found out, I would...”
“Thank you, Margaret.”
Chloe limped towards Margaret, who was at a loss, and took her hand affectionately.
"Thank you so much."
“I don’t have much time. Well, I’ll be back soon.”
Margaret gave Gray a small bow, opened the cabin door, and hurriedly disappeared. Chloe closed the door tightly, then approached Gray and squeezed his hands. Feeling his warm body temperature even in the winter, her eyes grew hot without warning.
“Wonderful, Gray. Like a priest from a foreign land.”
Chloe smiled at him with wet eyes. Gray looked at her and wrinkled his nose a little embarrassedly.
“The priest’s robe... is awkward.”
“No. It suits you well. Really.”
Chloe led him and sat him down on a small chair, then went to the stove and familiarly poured tea. Gray’s eyes darkened as he watched her withered back. Although he had heard a rough account of what had happened to her through Margaret, his heart felt even heavier when he saw her noticeably thin with his own eyes.
“Miss, are you okay?”
Chloe's shoulders flinched slightly as she turned around. Finally, she turned around and smiled brightly at Gray.
“Today is the best day I’ve had in months.”
Why do my tears flow when I see the young lady's smile? Gray could only hold both hands tightly as he watched her smile that seemed as if it would shatter like a faint light.
Uruk.
Chloe offered him some tea mixed with cream and sugar. Gray took a bite of the sandwich she offered without hesitation.
“If you’re worried, I’m not crazy, Gray.”
Margaret told him that Madame was locked in a room surrounded by her dead child's belongings and never went outside. She added that the Duchess had been going through a hard time after losing her child while treating the epidemic. But it seemed to Gray that Chloe was the only one who was having a hard time. The last Gray heard of the Duke was that he had entered the Swanton and was about to be crowned King.
“In fact, I can’t remember the last time my mind was this clear.”
“I know you’re not the type of person who will break down so easily.”
As Gray lowered his lips, Chloe looked at him with eyes full of affection. Gray knew how to comfort Chloe.
“Even if the world doesn’t know, I feel proud of myself because you know.”
“I can only imagine how hard it is for you to endure this.”
Chloe's lips trembled silently at Gray's softly caressing words. Chloe sipped her tea and quickly collected her expression.
“If I study the will of God, will I gain the skill to read people’s minds?”
“I indeed entered a monastery, but I never studied the will of God.”
“Really? I think you would have done well if you had studied. You would have probably done much better than Alice.”
Gray swallowed dryly as he looked at her laughing.
“Miss, do you know the decisive reason why I helped Miss Alice escape?”
“That must be because the child cried and clung to you in front of you.”
Of course, Alice had tearfully pleaded with Gray to speak out. But there was another decisive reason why Gray turned a blind eye to her escape.
“Miss Alice told me that she wanted to be happy.”
“...That was a very Alice-like appeal.”
A longing smile appeared on Chloe's face. Gray looked at her and spoke with trembling eyes.
“Miss Chloe. I can... do the same for you.”
As Chloe stared blankly at him, Gray continued speaking in a nervous voice.
“I thought about it for quite some time. If it would make the young lady happy, I thought it would be best not to open my mouth until I die, no matter what I heard or what I knew.”
Chloe's warm, brown eyes stared at Gray's rough hands shaking on the table.
“You must have had a hard time, Gray.”
A ragged breath escaped Gray's lips. This is why he sincerely wishes for Chloe's happiness. No matter what unfortunate situation he finds himself in, his heart aches at the tenderness with which he can think of others first.
“You have no idea what I found out, young lady.”
Gray's expression seemed to have returned to that of a ten-year-old who had been acting up in front of her, not knowing what to do. Chloe opened her mouth, carefully pushing a warm cup of tea in front of him, who had his lips pursed.
“I know that whatever it was, it was something that made you take the risk and come to me. And... I can guess what kind of story you heard.”
“The Duke of Tisse approached you with a clear purpose from the beginning.”
Chloe quietly put down her teacup as she listened to Gray's trembling voice. As the wind brushed her cheeks, the cold winter wind was cruel, and as she thought about how deeply Gray had agonized and hesitated as he came here alone, a corner of her heart grew warm.
“He knew in advance that there was gold buried in Verdier’s mountain, and he planned to propose to Miss Alice. A man named Count Cromwell planned to embroil Miss Alice in a scandal. Even if Miss Alice had not run away, Verdier would have been in trouble anyway, Miss.”
Ah, but Count Cromwell seemed like a good guy. A bitter smile appeared on Chloe's lips as she confirmed through Gray's mouth one thing about Damien's plan that she had not known about.
“You’re not really... surprised.”
Gray immediately noticed her calm reaction. Chloe nodded and tried to smile, but she couldn't help but feel her lips tremble.
“There is no secret in this world that can be hidden forever.”
“That’s not all.”
There was a small surge of excitement in Gray's voice. Chloe opened her mouth before he could suffer the pain of telling his story.
“It was a truly clever and cruel thing to make me a suspect in the Marchioness’s murder.”
“...Do you really think you forgave him even though you knew all that?”
Chloe let out a deep breath in front of Gray, who had an expression of disbelief on his face. Her lowered eyes blinked slowly.
“I hated him so much I couldn’t stand it. But isn’t it strange? I didn’t hate the child. Even though I hated Tisse’s name so much, I wanted to pass it on to my child. I guess I’m just a hopeless materialistic person.”
Gray whispered softly to her as she wiped the tears from her eyes with a handkerchief.
“Don’t say that. The young lady just wanted to protect her precious one.”
“Yeah. It’s all over now.”
He squeezed Chloe's hand as she tried to smile. He felt sorry for the girl who always had to endure and bear everything on her own. But it was also a shame that he couldn't do anything for her.
“Is it impossible for you to start over with me?”
Chloe looked at Gray with slightly surprised eyes. The way he lowered his gaze, unable to meet hers, showed just how much courage it took for him to say those words.
“The monastery sponsored by the House of Count Weiss was actually a secret meeting place for those who supported the Duke of Tisse. Just by keeping an ear open there, I could learn about how the world was going. So I saved up my salary and invested it in a trading company in the Duchy of Carter. I borrowed the name of a nobleman who is no longer in use.”
“That’s great, Gray.”
Chloe smiled genuinely at him.
“It was something anyone could do.”
“No. It was something I could do because it was you.”
Gray whispered softly, his eyes reddening and his breathing heavy.
“It was natural that I could not worship God in the monastery. I knew that it would be a sin for me, a person of humble birth, to dare to... harbor such feelings toward a noble lady.”
Chloe quietly reached out and caressed his hand. The tip of Gray's soft voice trembled faintly.
“Living my life waiting for a single ray of warm kindness from you, like sunshine, is drying me up to death.”
“...”
“I’ve become so greedy now that I can’t stand it anymore.”
“Don’t cry, Gray.”
“Please run away with me... Ugh...”
Tears flowed down Gray's face, which still retained the boyish aura. Chloe carefully handed him the handkerchief she had been using and finally opened her mouth.
“Thank you, Gray.”
“...”
“I will never forget it until I die. I will live forever, never forgetting this moment when you, risking your life, came here and told me to run away. If I become a chatty old lady, I will brag to the kind and grateful people who listen to my stories. I had this kind of romance, too. People who risked everything to come and confess their love...”
Chloe swallowed dryly and forced a smile through her wet eyes.
“There really was a good man...”
Gray's brown face turned completely red. Chloe's rejection was so typical of her. How could her rejection be so gentle and affectionate? Would it be possible to give up on her and live on?
“The tea has cooled down. I’ll give you some more.”
It was when Chloe took a deep breath and got up from her seat, and headed towards the stove.
“Can I never be gone?”
Gray, who grabbed her shoulder as she moved away without realizing it, sobbed in a wet voice. He couldn’t hold her tightly, and he couldn’t even touch her properly, as if he were touching a piece of craftsmanship that he was afraid would break, but his precious feelings were completely conveyed to Chloe.
"Gray."
Chloe slowly turned around and stood facing him on her uneasy legs. She smoothed the messy hair on his forehead, then spoke softly but clearly.
“It’s not that you can’t do it, it’s that I can’t do it.”
“Because I am of lowly status?”
"No."
Chloe shook her head with a clear expression. Ever since she set foot in Tisse, the dignity of nobility had long been an illusion to her.
"Sure?"
“Because you deserve a good girl who can give you her whole heart.”
Gray knew the weight of Chloe's words.
“I don’t care about anything.”
“Of course it is. But I’m not the type of person who can do that.”
The girl Gray fell in love with was someone who answered his sincerity with sincerity. Gray realized anew that Chloe's kindness could make him so sad.
“If I rely on your good intentions now, I will have to live my whole life feeling guilty towards you. You, who see me like that, will never be able to be happy either. Because...”
Chloe paused for a moment, then whispered.
“Because you are not the kind of person who can oppress someone and keep them by your side.”
He may never learn, and will never know, how to force another person's feelings on them and make them his own.
“Let me ask you one last question.”
“What is that?”
“If only I had confessed to you a little sooner... before all this happened...”
Gray swallowed dryly as his throat got clogged. Chloe listened to him with difficulty as he spoke.
“Would the outcome have been different if that had happened?”
Warm gazes collided in the air.
“What if you told me to leave everything behind and run away with you?”
"Yes."
Chloe and Gray both knew when that time was. It was the night Chloe had decided to go to the Duke of Tisse, right after Alice had run away. It was a summer night when the morning dew clung to the grass. She still had no idea about the Duke’s hidden plans.
“Perhaps my answer would have been the same as today.”
Gray finally nodded, his face completely wet.
“I knew you would say that.”
“Gray, you know. I always thought you had a personality similar to mine.”
“...In what way?”
“In that they are people who want to protect the other person’s world rather than destroy it.”
Gray wiped his tears with the back of his hand and smiled. It was his good fortune to have met someone like the woman before him even once in his life.
“Promise me one thing, miss.”
“What is it?”
Outside, Margaret knocked, signaling that someone was coming to check on the Duchess' safety.
“I really hope you are happy, Miss. For my sake, at least.”
“Yeah. You just remember this one thing.”
Chloe spoke clearly as she opened the cabin door.
“Whatever choice I make, I do it of my own free will.”
“...I will keep that in mind.”
“I’ll be happy, Gray.”
Gray finally turned around after taking one last look at Chloe's face, which was still smiling brightly. As soon as he disappeared into the grass, she saw the butler, Paul, walking towards her from a distance, dragging a box of coal. Chloe stood with her hands on the hard wooden wall and took a deep breath.
This is all I have to do in this world.
***
The train, which had been packed from Swanton to the freight car, was packed. The gentleman sitting among the crowd of the cheapest third-class passengers looked like a person of high status, but no one thought it was strange. They just thought he was some unlucky nobleman who couldn't get a first-class seat despite his money because of the prolonged railway strike.
“Where are you going, my lord?”
“Isn’t this the final destination?”
When the gentleman with his hat pulled down asked briefly, the short man who had spoken gave an awkward smile.
“Ah, that’s right. I guess you live in Tisse. The people of Tisse territory must be very excited to hear that His Excellency the Duke has become King.”
When the gentleman did not respond, the man sitting next to him quickly found another topic.
“I’m a phonograph dealer. I travel all over the kingdom, selling phonographs. Have you heard of it, my lord? It’s a machine that plays music. When my mother first saw it, she was so frightened that she thought she had seen an evil spirit. Of course, now she’s demanding that I bring her more music.”
The man continued speaking, his voice rising.
“Now that the royal family, who had been suffering from headaches, has stabilized, isn’t this a time of true peace? In times like these, what the people seek is romance. Imagine being able to hear the performance of Julian Wyatt, who is praised for his devilish talent, in your own home.”
“Are you trying to sell to me now?”
“Oh, no. My lord, you can see his performance from the front row. Even people like us can listen to his music, at least on the gramophone. I’m just saying.”
The man added sheepishly, scratching his chubby cheek, where his red beard had grown thickly.
“If Duke Tisse... no, His Majesty the King were to hear this, he would laugh at it, wouldn’t he?”
The train, which had been passing through the birch forest, was now entering its final destination, Tisse Station. The gentleman suddenly asked the man who was packing his bag.
“Why do you think he would laugh?”
“Aren’t there many people who do businesses that are much more profitable than this?”
“Do you have Julian’s music too?”
A man whose small suit looked like it was about to burst spoke in a broken voice, hugging a heavy bag.
“That’s... I have no way of contacting you. I tried to ask the nobles I have connections with, but I was turned away.”
The man's eyes widened silently as the gentleman took out a checkbook from inside his coat. Could it be that the sale was successful? The gentleman took out a fountain pen and glanced at him, asking in a dry voice.
“How much does a gramophone cost?”
Underneath the brim of his hat, the man who had seen the gentleman’s face for the first time swallowed dry saliva involuntarily, feeling nervous. It was a great face, but the gaze that was looking straight at him made his legs tremble even though he had done nothing wrong.
“Tch, seven thousand five hundred sekels. You have no idea how much I ran around trying to meet this price.”
“Isn’t the price still too high for an average household?”
The red-bearded man clenched his jaw as the gentleman asked the man who was emphasizing that he was absolutely not being ripped off just because he was a noble. In fact, not many people would buy a gramophone, which had been treated as a recorder or a child's toy, for listening to music. He couldn't honestly say that he had to sell it at a high price, even if he sold one, because he had to make enough money to feed his family. The gentleman glanced at his embarrassed expression and wrote down the amount on the check.
“I’ll give you Julian’s address, so meet him in person and try to persuade him. Then send him the gramophone and his music along with it.”
The man froze for a moment, dumbfounded by the tremendous opportunity presented by the gentleman before him.
“Is it too much?”
“That... that can’t be true, my lord!”
The train came to a screeching halt. The gentleman handed the man the check and added one last word.
“If I may give you a word of advice, you should have more confidence and faith in what you are doing, before everyone else rushes in and easily follows the path you have paved.”
The gentleman who opened the guest room door disappeared faster than anyone else. The man quickly put on his glasses and held up the check to the light to check its authenticity, wondering if the gentleman had been teasing him.
“Julian Wyatt’s address. Is this true?”
The man's eyes widened as he looked at the beautifully handwritten letters. This was because he had noticed the signature next to the seal with a birch tree drawn on it.
Things go to the royal family.
Damien Ernst von Tise
The man hurriedly put the check into the inside pocket of his tight jacket, afraid that someone might see it.
“Aren’t you going to get off?”
The other passengers who had woken up looked at him strangely and winked. The man blinked and then hit his cheek hard with his hand. It didn’t hurt, whether it was a dream or reality.
***
Damien walked quickly through the crowds that filled the hall to the horse storage area. Weiss had said he would bring the Duchess himself, but he couldn't wait until then. He had to make sure everything was right before the coronation.
“Stop pushing. Are you planning on knocking the old man down?”
A sharp voice reached his ear. Damien turned his head at the familiar voice and saw Eliza standing a little way away from him. She seemed to be boarding the last train to Winsbury via Swanton.
“Come here...!”
Eliza was seen holding the hand of her attendant and helping her board the train. The small old woman seemed to be her mother, who lived in Winsbury. Thanks to Chloe's good recommendation, she was living well with her family despite her great injustice in Tisse.
“Take care!!!”
Before Eliza, who was shouting at the back of his old mother's head, could find him, Damien quickly turned around. In this situation, where he was practically being pushed by the crowd, there was nothing good in having his identity revealed.
When he returned to the castle, he thought it might be a good idea to bring up Eliza's story to Chloe to start a conversation. He wasn't particularly interested in the old servant's well-being. He was just sure that his wife, who had a particularly close bond with the servants, would be pleased.
“The train to Winsbury is leaving soon!”
Amid the huge crowd, the stationmaster blew his whistle until his face turned red.
“The last train to Winsbury via Swanton! Hurry up and get on board!”
Damien hurried out of the station, pushing past the crowd of people who were swarming in. There was no time to waste here. The letter from Chloe was neatly folded and stored in his clothes.
To my dear Duke
After you left, I thought a lot on my own and realized something.
That I've been acting like a child and sacrificing you for my sorrow.
Even though I know it is a needless worry, I am writing this because I am worried that I might cause Your Excellency to miss out on something you have so desperately wanted to do.
Please finish everything safely and bring it back to you. Show that my father's regret at not being able to send me to the palace was not in vain.
Because you are the only one who can prove it to me.
I love you, Damien.
I sincerely hope that I have not become your weakness.
From Chloe, who is looking forward to the changed world you will create.
It didn't matter whether the teardrop-stained letter was her true heart or a ploy to get to the Supreme Court in Swanton with divorce papers. The task of life had been completed, and now all that was left for Damien to do was to give Chloe the Queen's crown and confess to her. To me, the sun of this country, you are the only one forever. Our child can now be born without any worries.
Given Chloe's personality, it would be impossible for her to completely forget the past. But Damien staked everything on the fact that she admitted that she loved him.
He will gently caress Chloe's frozen heart for a very long time and eventually melt it. It was in this context that he showed impulsive generosity to the phonograph businessman he met by chance on the train. In the most beautiful bedroom of the Rose Palace, which will now be the royal palace, he will listen to the passionate music of Julian Wyatt that captivated her, and his even more passionate breathing will make her small lips burst open.
Even if the beginning was wrong, it was impossible to erase the memories they had made together. It meant that they could not deny the moments when they exchanged affectionate glances, the times when they poured out their true feelings mixed with desire.
Chloe, you and I can start over now.
A dense birch forest with gray-brown trees, each raising its head upwards. A train with a loud whistle began to move southward, belching black smoke. A smile appeared on Damien's face as he rode away quickly in the opposite direction of the train.
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