19. The beginning of spring
The Duke, who had carried Chloe to the castle, cancelled dinner with her mother on the pretext that she was sick. Priscilla returned with a bright smile, unable to hide her anticipation that something good might have finally happened to the newlyweds. She had heard the news of the Duke and Duchess's marriage, and having an heir was the most important thing for a noble family.
“Your Excellency, I swore to be faithful to my marriage, and I will continue to do so. Some may consider infidelity to be a refined thing, but I do not.”
It was a given. As far as Damien knew, Chloe was the most old-fashioned person he had ever met. But in the heart of the young Duke, blinded by jealousy, only anger burned.
“Gray is my good friend.”
“Don’t mention another man’s name.”
“He is a great servant.”
“Don’t speak to others as if you were in awe of them.”
Chloe sighed and frowned.
“Then what should I do?”
Chloe, knowing what answer would come out of Damien's mouth, continued speaking in a raised voice.
“How can I continue to fulfill my Duchess’ duties...!”
Chloe bit him as he covered her mouth with a kiss. Bright red blood appeared on Damien's lips. Chloe spat at him, shivering.
“Please get out. Before I despise you even more.”
Boom! The door slammed shut roughly.
At night, Chloe lay still in her bedroom, quietly blinking her eyes. The sound of rain hitting the window sounded eerie. It seemed true that most of Tisse’s four seasons were fierce. Chloe felt a little heartbroken when she thought of Gray, who had left alone on the train on a rainy night.
Why is the Duke so self-righteous?
Chloe once again asked the unanswered question, but all she got was silence. In fact, Gray had done nothing wrong. Why was the Duke so cruel to the servant who had even perjured himself in court for her? The Damien that Chloe had seen so far was not an irrational person, although he had a bad personality.
Chloe, who was pondering the reason, suddenly opened her eyes.
That's ridiculous.
She squeezed her eyes shut again and shook her head. Her hair squeaked against the soft pillow. Chloe turned around and hugged the large pillow. Margaret kept saying strange things about him, and her judgment must have been flawed.
Wasn't it a marriage without love from the beginning? And even if nothing else, this one thing was certain.
'I can't believe that someone so twisted could truly care about someone.'
Chloe, who had concluded that it was even more unlikely that the other person was her, rolled over again and lay down straight. She pulled the blanket down to her chin and tried to stop her useless fantasies. With a bang, the candle went out.
At dawn, when the sound of rain was getting deeper, the bedroom door opened quietly, and Damien approached. His footsteps were muffled by the soft wool carpet. He watched Chloe in the darkness for a while, then came to the bedside and lowered his head. His lips touched Chloe’s forehead as if branding it, then slowly lifted. Next, the bridge of her nose, then her cheek, then her ear.
“The reason I’m not hugging you now is because I’m trying to show the least bit of courtesy to the Duchess.”
It was a voice that knew exactly that she wasn't sleeping. Chloe swallowed dryly without realizing it and curled up.
“I am grateful that - married me and gave me the name Tisse.”
If I hadn't, I would have hugged you carelessly, broken you into pieces, and made you cry.
Damien whispered the last word perfectly into her ear before pulling away from Chloe, whose eyelids were fluttering.
“Good night, Ma’am.”
It was no wonder Chloe had trouble sleeping at night.
***
It was a little later than usual when the bell rang in the Duchess's bedroom. Her personal maid, Margaret, got up quickly and headed to the bedroom. She had already finished preparing to serve breakfast.
In fact, when they learned that the infirm Duchess had become the new Duchess, there were rumors among the servants. The majority of them thought that she was not qualified to be the mistress of a large castle as the daughter of a poor country lord, and that she was not good enough. The few who remained sympathized with her. The position of Duchess of Tisse was one in which she would inevitably meet many people, so her future was bright and she would be ignored by others.
'Huh! Everyone got it all wrong.'
The Duchess, who had not been to the castle for half a year even after her marriage, caused a huge stir as soon as she appeared at Birch Castle. She not only fired Lady Eliza and Mr. Robinson, who had been the leaders of the servants, but also saved Charlie, Eliza's grandson who had committed adultery, and even made an unconventional appointment by appointing Margaret, who had been a mere kitchen maid, as the Duchess's personal maid, citing her skillful hands.
“Are you on your way to Madam?”
“Yes, that’s right.”
The new butler, Paul, who had been in charge of the Swanton's villa, called Margaret over. Some said that he was a city person and a bit of a slacker, but he was also the only one who had no complaints about Margaret being the Duchess's personal maid.
“When Madam finishes, you can help the Duke get ready.”
“Huh? What about Mr. Bernard?”
“Leave the Duke’s attendants and let the lady help with the preparations herself.”
Paul lowered his voice slightly as he looked at Margaret, whose eyes were wide.
“It was ordered by the Duke. The two are spending their time, and we don’t need to know why. It’s just that the two skipped dinner last night...”
“I’ll prepare some sandwiches and biscuits. There’s still some time until breakfast.”
“Please.”
Paul nodded as Margaret spoke cleverly. Margaret hurried to the kitchen.
“Please prepare some food for the master and madam to eat together in the morning.”
“I should make something light since I have breakfast too.”
Margaret nodded and turned to leave, but then returned to her seat.
“No. I want something sufficient without lacking anything.”
"Why?"
“...Because the story between the two of them might be long.”
Mrs. Dutton, who had been watching Margaret nod, opened her eyes wide and belatedly realized her intention. It meant that the Duke and Duchess, who had been giving off a cold vibe since last night, might need some private time.
“I’ll send them a morning so wonderful that the two won’t have to leave the bedroom until dinnertime.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Dutton.”
“Thanks to Madam, I can remain in this castle, and I must see with my own eyes that she produces a worthy successor. Yes.”
Before Mrs. Dutton could finish her speech, Margaret smiled and hurried to the lady’s bedroom. It was now the wish of all the servants that the Duchess, who valued only the sincerity and ability of each person, would live happily in this castle for a long time.
“To do that, first, we need to reconcile the two of them.”
After laying out all the supplies, Margaret quietly closed the door and disappeared.
“What are you doing?”
Chloe, who had been standing there blankly, forced herself to move her unsteady steps only after Damien glanced at her.
“I don’t know if the Duchess’s duties include performing the duties of an attendant.”
“If I stay with someone who is sick, I will be in big trouble if I catch an infectious disease.”
It was unfortunate that Bernard, the attendant, had started coughing, but Chloe never thought that she would have to attend to the Duke herself.
“But I’ve never done anything like this before.”
“You can sew up a laceration, so I don’t think you could do something as simple as scraping a face with a dull knife.”
Chloe swallowed dryly as Damien simply reprimanded her. The silver cart was lined with shaving supplies, gleaming in the morning sunlight. The butter knife was meant to be used to trim the beard growing on the Duke’s chin.
“Your Excellency.”
"Ma'am."
Damien looked straight at her. Lying sideways on the single sofa, he looked like a man fully prepared.
“I don’t think it would detract from your perfect appearance, Your Excellency, if you neglected to trim your beard for a day or so, which is so fine that it is almost invisible to the eye.”
Damien let out a small laugh. Chloe hurried to continue before he could sugarcoat her words again.
“Your Excellency, you are in such good order that you could go out for formal training right now.”
“Chloe.”
"Yes."
“I’m hungry, so you’d better finish quickly.”
The words “Do it yourself” were on the tip of her tongue, but Chloe barely managed to swallow them and turned her head to grab the shining sword. It seemed like the only way to end the feeling of talking to a wall was to quickly resolve the task at hand.
“Are you good at it?”
“I told you not to say anything...”
Chloe clenched her teeth and muttered. Damien licked his lips, looking at Chloe’s focused, determined eyes and firm lips. Chloe’s eyes glared at him. It was clear that she was paying attention to even the slightest movement, as she was trying hard not to hurt his face.
Damien felt the smoothness of the knife moving squarely, squarely, desperately over his jawline. This was what made women so angry.
“There’s nothing you can’t do. You would have done well as a maid.”
Chloe frowned, and a wrinkle appeared between her white eyebrows. She couldn’t bear to look into his eyes because she was worried that her emotions would show. She didn’t know that no matter how hard she tried to hide it, it would all show through her attitude.
“I appreciate the compliment, but I think it might have been too much for a maid.”
“Why?”
“I am not good at decorating my hair. It is something that Your Excellency the Duke yourself pointed out.”
The aftertaste was also this long. Damien turned his head towards her, who was trying hard to hide his trembling voice while still saying what he wanted to say. As a result, his skin grazed the blade, and red blood spread under Damien’s chin.
Chloe dropped the knife in surprise. It was so nice to see her face turn pale. Her hands were shaking as she wiped his face with a warm cloth and pressed it against his.
“Stay still.”
“It’s a mess.”
“It’s because the Duke is moving...”
“I like it when you’re a mess.”
Chloe took a deep breath as she watched him mutter while staring at her intently. The knife was so sharp that it could have been a disaster, but the man in front of her acted as if it had nothing to do with being cut.
“I.. I don’t want to be a mess.”
"I don't care."
Damien smiled slightly. Chloe had expected that answer to some extent. Now, rather than hating the terribly selfish man, she felt more curious.
“The Duke expected me to be a perfect Duchess. Now you say you like me to make mistakes and mess things up. I just... can’t figure out what the Duke wants.”
“I thought you were smart, but you’re actually quite stupid.”
“Don’t avoid answering by blaming the other person.”
Damien licked his lips again. Chloe slowly removed the cloth that had been pressing down on his wound. There were still a few drops of blood seeping out, so she pressed the cloth again. She had no choice but to stay with him until the bleeding stopped.
“That’s what I want, Chloe.”
Chloe held her breath and focused on Damien's words.
“You, who are perfect, are only messed up in front of me.”
Chloe's hands trembled quietly. Damien, who felt her trembling vividly, saw more and more drops of blood spread across the nape of his neck.
“I need to change the clothes.”
“Didn’t you want a clear answer?”
He grabbed Chloe's wrist as she tried to back away, and she fell on top of him. The cloth she was holding fell to the floor.
“Your head is full of me. You worry about my every move, you make stupid mistakes, and you still want me to hold you.”
Chloe felt her heart beating strongly against her chest. As the heartbeat grew stronger, blood continued to flow from the wound.
“Your Excellency, I have one question for you.”
“Yes. As much as you want.”
“Do you love me?”
Damien just stared at her with darkened eyes and didn’t answer. Chloe looked at him and asked again. It seemed like it was the only time she could ask.
“Answer me, Damien. Do you love me?”
So why are you acting so contradictory towards me?
“Is that what you want? To have me whisper sweet nothings in your ear, telling you I love you?”
Damien finally opened his mouth and looked at her, snickering in a low voice. Chloe paid no attention to his ridicule.
“If all your hypocrisy was because you loved me, then I’m willing to forgive you.”
“I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I don’t need your forgiveness.”
Damien's expression was distorted as if he were angry.
“Your Excellency, I cannot love someone I cannot forgive.”
Damien's eyes shook for the first time as he looked into Chloe's sincere eyes.
“What does that mean?”
“Just like I said.”
“...Tell me what you mean right now.”
“I asked the question first, Your Excellency.”
Chloe's voice trembled thinly. She now really wanted to know.
“Do you love me?”
She wanted to show that if this is how he loves someone, there are other ways in this world.
“Any answer is fine. Just tell me the truth.”
Finally, Damien held her tightly in his hand and whispered in a low voice.
“From the moment I first saw you, I wanted to hold you in my hand.”
Chloe gasped for breath. Her heart was pounding so fast it felt like it might burst.
“If wanting to make you mine is called love, then I have loved you madly for a very long time.”
His face, which spoke of love, was completely different from the whispers of love that young Chloe had vaguely imagined. It was not earnest, nor did it make her blush with trembling and excitement, but rather a confession so cruel that it took her breath away.
“I’ll tell you this a thousand, ten thousand times.”
Chloe was finally forced to experience the truth she had tried so hard to ignore out of fear: he had shot an arrow into her heart.
“I love you, Chloe Verdier.”
Chloe whispered to him with red lips.
“Now, I think it’ll be okay.”
"What?"
“Your Excellency, I see you in such a disheveled state.”
Damien's lips curved upwards in a very typical permission.
“I’m looking forward to it.”
Everything I did to make you Chloe von Tisse, slowly melts away with the start of spring.
"Me too."
The moment I see your heart, which I never thought was love, my frozen heart slowly melts.
That day, the Duke and Duchess' bedroom door remained open for a long time.
“It was ordered by the Duke. The two are spending their time, and we don’t need to know why. It’s just that the two skipped dinner last night...”
“I’ll prepare some sandwiches and biscuits. There’s still some time until breakfast.”
“Please.”
Paul nodded as Margaret spoke cleverly. Margaret hurried to the kitchen.
“Please prepare some food for the master and madam to eat together in the morning.”
“I should make something light since I have breakfast too.”
Margaret nodded and turned to leave, but then returned to her seat.
“No. I want something sufficient without lacking anything.”
"Why?"
“...Because the story between the two of them might be long.”
Mrs. Dutton, who had been watching Margaret nod, opened her eyes wide and belatedly realized her intention. It meant that the Duke and Duchess, who had been giving off a cold vibe since last night, might need some private time.
“I’ll send them a morning so wonderful that the two won’t have to leave the bedroom until dinnertime.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Dutton.”
“Thanks to Madam, I can remain in this castle, and I must see with my own eyes that she produces a worthy successor. Yes.”
Before Mrs. Dutton could finish her speech, Margaret smiled and hurried to the lady’s bedroom. It was now the wish of all the servants that the Duchess, who valued only the sincerity and ability of each person, would live happily in this castle for a long time.
“To do that, first, we need to reconcile the two of them.”
***
After laying out all the supplies, Margaret quietly closed the door and disappeared.
“What are you doing?”
Chloe, who had been standing there blankly, forced herself to move her unsteady steps only after Damien glanced at her.
“I don’t know if the Duchess’s duties include performing the duties of an attendant.”
“If I stay with someone who is sick, I will be in big trouble if I catch an infectious disease.”
It was unfortunate that Bernard, the attendant, had started coughing, but Chloe never thought that she would have to attend to the Duke herself.
“But I’ve never done anything like this before.”
“You can sew up a laceration, so I don’t think you could do something as simple as scraping a face with a dull knife.”
Chloe swallowed dryly as Damien simply reprimanded her. The silver cart was lined with shaving supplies, gleaming in the morning sunlight. The butter knife was meant to be used to trim the beard growing on the Duke’s chin.
“Your Excellency.”
"Ma'am."
Damien looked straight at her. Lying sideways on the single sofa, he looked like a man fully prepared.
“I don’t think it would detract from your perfect appearance, Your Excellency, if you neglected to trim your beard for a day or so, which is so fine that it is almost invisible to the eye.”
Damien let out a small laugh. Chloe hurried to continue before he could sugarcoat her words again.
“Your Excellency, you are in such good order that you could go out for formal training right now.”
“Chloe.”
"Yes."
“I’m hungry, so you’d better finish quickly.”
The words “Do it yourself” were on the tip of her tongue, but Chloe barely managed to swallow them and turned her head to grab the shining sword. It seemed like the only way to end the feeling of talking to a wall was to quickly resolve the task at hand.
“Are you good at it?”
“I told you not to say anything...”
Chloe clenched her teeth and muttered. Damien licked his lips, looking at Chloe’s focused, determined eyes and firm lips. Chloe’s eyes glared at him. It was clear that she was paying attention to even the slightest movement, as she was trying hard not to hurt his face.
Damien felt the smoothness of the knife moving squarely, squarely, desperately over his jawline. This was what made women so angry.
“There’s nothing you can’t do. You would have done well as a maid.”
Chloe frowned, and a wrinkle appeared between her white eyebrows. She couldn’t bear to look into his eyes because she was worried that her emotions would show. She didn’t know that no matter how hard she tried to hide it, it would all show through her attitude.
“I appreciate the compliment, but I think it might have been too much for a maid.”
“Why?”
“I am not good at decorating my hair. It is something that Your Excellency the Duke yourself pointed out.”
The aftertaste was also this long. Damien turned his head towards her, who was trying hard to hide his trembling voice while still saying what he wanted to say. As a result, his skin grazed the blade, and red blood spread under Damien’s chin.
Chloe dropped the knife in surprise. It was so nice to see her face turn pale. Her hands were shaking as she wiped his face with a warm cloth and pressed it against his.
“Stay still.”
“It’s a mess.”
“It’s because the Duke is moving...”
“I like it when you’re a mess.”
Chloe took a deep breath as she watched him mutter while staring at her intently. The knife was so sharp that it could have been a disaster, but the man in front of her acted as if it had nothing to do with being cut.
“I.. I don’t want to be a mess.”
"I don't care."
Damien smiled slightly. Chloe had expected that answer to some extent. Now, rather than hating the terribly selfish man, she felt more curious.
“The Duke expected me to be a perfect Duchess. Now you say you like me to make mistakes and mess things up. I just... can’t figure out what the Duke wants.”
“I thought you were smart, but you’re actually quite stupid.”
“Don’t avoid answering by blaming the other person.”
Damien licked his lips again. Chloe slowly removed the cloth that had been pressing down on his wound. There were still a few drops of blood seeping out, so she pressed the cloth again. She had no choice but to stay with him until the bleeding stopped.
“That’s what I want, Chloe.”
Chloe held her breath and focused on Damien's words.
“You, who are perfect, are only messed up in front of me.”
Chloe's hands trembled quietly. Damien, who felt her trembling vividly, saw more and more drops of blood spread across the nape of his neck.
“I need to change the clothes.”
“Didn’t you want a clear answer?”
He grabbed Chloe's wrist as she tried to back away, and she fell on top of him. The cloth she was holding fell to the floor.
“Your head is full of me. You worry about my every move, you make stupid mistakes, and you still want me to hold you.”
Chloe felt her heart beating strongly against her chest. As the heartbeat grew stronger, blood continued to flow from the wound.
“Your Excellency, I have one question for you.”
“Yes. As much as you want.”
“Do you love me?”
Damien just stared at her with darkened eyes and didn’t answer. Chloe looked at him and asked again. It seemed like it was the only time she could ask.
“Answer me, Damien. Do you love me?”
So why are you acting so contradictory towards me?
“Is that what you want? To have me whisper sweet nothings in your ear, telling you I love you?”
Damien finally opened his mouth and looked at her, snickering in a low voice. Chloe paid no attention to his ridicule.
“If all your hypocrisy was because you loved me, then I’m willing to forgive you.”
“I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I don’t need your forgiveness.”
Damien's expression was distorted as if he were angry.
“Your Excellency, I cannot love someone I cannot forgive.”
Damien's eyes shook for the first time as he looked into Chloe's sincere eyes.
“What does that mean?”
“Just like I said.”
“...Tell me what you mean right now.”
“I asked the question first, Your Excellency.”
Chloe's voice trembled thinly. She now really wanted to know.
“Do you love me?”
She wanted to show that if this is how he loves someone, there are other ways in this world.
“Any answer is fine. Just tell me the truth.”
Finally, Damien held her tightly in his hand and whispered in a low voice.
“From the moment I first saw you, I wanted to hold you in my hand.”
Chloe gasped for breath. Her heart was pounding so fast it felt like it might burst.
“If wanting to make you mine is called love, then I have loved you madly for a very long time.”
His face, which spoke of love, was completely different from the whispers of love that young Chloe had vaguely imagined. It was not earnest, nor did it make her blush with trembling and excitement, but rather a confession so cruel that it took her breath away.
“I’ll tell you this a thousand, ten thousand times.”
Chloe was finally forced to experience the truth she had tried so hard to ignore out of fear: he had shot an arrow into her heart.
“I love you, Chloe Verdier.”
Chloe whispered to him with red lips.
“Now, I think it’ll be okay.”
"What?"
“Your Excellency, I see you in such a disheveled state.”
Damien's lips curved upwards in a very typical permission.
“I’m looking forward to it.”
Everything I did to make you Chloe von Tisse, slowly melts away with the start of spring.
"Me too."
The moment I see your heart, which I never thought was love, my frozen heart slowly melts.
That day, the Duke and Duchess' bedroom door remained open for a long time.
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