I looked up at him, flinching as the hand he was holding felt hot as if it was on fire.
Perdes' eyes met mine and his gaze curved prettily.
“The order was reversed. I should have told you what I thought of you first.”
No. You have to stop it.
“I don’t think of you as just a colleague.”
I have to stop it...
“I love you as a woman.”
“...”
“I think you already know.”
In the end, the words that could not be stopped became large rocks and created deep waves in the calm lake.
Said.
I finally said it.
Although Perdes had expressed his feelings many times before, this was the first time he was saying it of his own volition, so he was a little moved.
The emotion was short-lived, and when Adele looked very embarrassed and lowered her head, Perdes smiled bitterly.
It stung because the action felt like a subtle rejection.
He didn't want to embarrass her, so he put his heart in a box and hid it away.
Even though his feelings had grown bigger and spilled out from time to time, he pretended not to notice them, pretended he had made a mistake, and did his best to ignore them.
But when Perdes heard that a man he didn't even know was trying to make Adele his Queen, the sanity that he had been holding onto suddenly snapped.
He didn't want to lose her to another man.
'It was taken away.'
Perdes laughed inwardly, finding it funny that he was using the expression "she was taken away" when she had never been his.
He also regretted acting so hastily.
But it was already spilled milk.
Even if he could turn back time, he would have made the same choice.
So let's push forward.
Perdes, who had promised himself to be honest and show her all his heart even if she threw him out because of this, opened his heavy mouth.
“I know that this situation and my confession are burdensome. I fully understand that you are flustered.”
As Perdes gently ran his thumb over the back of her hand, Adele's earlobes turned bright red.
Her small body flinched and clung to the back of the sofa.
“But please don’t push me away too much. I want you to think about it seriously. About spending the rest of your life with me.”
“...!”
Adele, who had been burying herself in the back of the sofa as if it were a mouse hole, raised her head in surprise.
Eyes that seemed similar but held different emotions crossed in the air.
“What are you saying now...”
“I told you to seriously consider spending the rest of your life with me.”
She thought she misheard, but she didn't. Adele bit her lip at the words that were more embarrassing than simply confessing his love.
Spending the rest of our lives together was no different from getting married.
Marriage?
I'm marrying Perdes.
Her bright green eyes widened at something she had never thought about before.
On the other hand, he thought she would immediately reject it, but instead, she saw Perdes' expression brighten slightly as he looked at her with hope as he pondered the matter.
Perdes leaned slightly towards Adele and asked in a low voice.
“You hate me?”
Adele's ears tingled as he spoke in a whisper at a very close distance.
Adele hesitated, craned her neck, then shook her head slightly.
“Then you don’t want to marry me?”
"That..."
Adele closed her mouth without being able to continue speaking.
Her eyes, which had turned downward to avoid the burdensome gaze of Perdes, traced the ornate patterns on the tablecloth.
She had to firmly refuse.
Hesitating like this would only give him useless hope, so it was right to draw a clear line.
“...”
That's true, but why can't I say anything?
When Chernosser and others hinted at getting married, she cut them off without a second thought.
But why can't that be done now?
Is it because I have received a lot of help from Perdes, so I don't want to hurt him?
'I don't know.'
Her mind was completely jumbled because she couldn't figure out what to do.
She wasn't this confused when she found out her father's secret, but now she doesn't know why.
“You were planning on getting married anyway.”
Perdes threw another stone into the lake of her heart, where a torrent of water was rising.
When Adele raised her head again and looked at him, he asked again.
“You were going to get married someday, right?”
Adele answered, blinking her eyes slowly.
“Maybe... I should.”
Since all of her previous marriages were unhappy, she didn't want to do it, but she had no choice because she needed a child to continue the family line.
She had no choice.
So Adele was considering adopting the boy Leo had brought home as his heir and passing him on to the Leopold family if he really was a blood relative of the Duke of Leopold.
Then there would be no need to marry a man she doesn't like and put in the effort to have children.
Adele no longer had to worry that that guy would take her place like Chernosser did.
But the decision was made not to do so because there was no guarantee that the boy would not covet her position.
She also wanted to see her child grow up to be a great leader in the industry.
A child who is not simply a blood relative of Duke Leopold's family, but is her own blood.
Kid.
Adele suddenly remembered the child she had borne in her first life and bit the soft flesh in her mouth until it bled.
She had lost interest in Chernosser a long time ago, but she couldn't hate the child in her stomach.
Rather, she felt even more affectionate towards him because this child was the only family she had left.
I'll treat you well when you're born.
Adele promised over and over again that she would do her best as a mother, but in the end, she died in vain without ever being able to hold her child in her arms.
'I guess it's better this way.'
If she had held the child in my arms, she might not have been able to let go of her obsession with the child and might have done something crazy like marry Chernosser again.
Adele turned her head to hide the bitter smile spreading across her lips, but Perdes had already seen it.
He said with a smile as bitter as Adele's.
“It seems like you don’t want to get married.”
Adele nodded, not because she meant it that way, but because it was hard to explain the original meaning and because what she said was true.
“It’s not a good thing. To me, marriage is a duty to have children, nothing more, nothing less.”
So, it was a euphemism for saying that it was hard to accept his feelings, but Perdes must have taken it in a different way because he closed his eyes and smiled prettily.
“Really? Then I can do my duty with you.”
Adele was speechless at the completely unexpected answer and stared blankly at him. Then Perdes pressed his forehead against hers.
“Choose me, Adele.”
His low voice rang softly in her ears and made her heart pound mercilessly.
Adele just realized that the only person in this world who called her by her name was Perdes.
“I won’t be greedy enough to make you look at me with the same feelings.”
“...”
“Choose me because I will just be there for you silently, like I am now, to give you strength.”
Adele closed her eyes tightly, feeling a little burdened by the honest feelings that were pressing upon her.
The sound of her heart pounding echoed in her ears.
Objectively speaking, it wasn't a bad suggestion. Rather, it made her ears perk up.
That was understandable. The husband she wanted was someone who would not be greedy for her position and would not be a burden to the family, and Perdes met all of these conditions.
Moreover, he said that he does not covet her heart, so it would be hard to find a more perfect husband than him.
'That's why I couldn't easily reject his confession and were worried.'
Adele found the source of her tangled worries, but she still felt uneasy.
She felt like she was missing something.
Adele tried to think about what it could be, but her head, which was bursting with worries, refused to think any further.
It's not really that important.
Adele, who thought so, nodded without thinking further, relying on the conclusions she had reached so far.
“I'll think about it.”
"Yes."
Although Perdes was disappointed that he had not received a perfect answer after having gathered up the courage to confess, he was satisfied with the positive response he had received.
He felt like pressing on further here would have the opposite effect.
Perdes lifted his chin and spoke forcefully.
“I must try to make it so that you can choose me from now on.”
“You are doing well enough even now.”
“It means I’ll do better. So that you won’t be able to think of any other husband besides me.”
I already don't think about anyone else but you.
Adele rolled the words she couldn't bring herself to say in her mouth, swallowed them, and smiled weakly.
Even that appearance looks pretty, so even if the bean pod is covered, it is covered tightly.
Perdes, who realized anew how much he liked Adele, smiled faintly and lightly kissed the back of her hand.
Then he felt her fingers curl inward as if embarrassed.
He told Adele that she didn't need to give him her heart, but in truth, that was a blatant lie.
She was already quite surprised, but if he asked her to give him her heart, he thought she would get scared and run away.
Now that he's succeeded in appealing to her, he needs to take it slow from now on.
His ultimate goal was to slowly seep into her, like a drizzle soaking her collar, so that when she suddenly came to her senses, she would be completely absorbed in him and unable to escape.
Perdes' eyes met mine and his gaze curved prettily.
“The order was reversed. I should have told you what I thought of you first.”
No. You have to stop it.
“I don’t think of you as just a colleague.”
I have to stop it...
“I love you as a woman.”
“...”
“I think you already know.”
In the end, the words that could not be stopped became large rocks and created deep waves in the calm lake.
***
Said.
I finally said it.
Although Perdes had expressed his feelings many times before, this was the first time he was saying it of his own volition, so he was a little moved.
The emotion was short-lived, and when Adele looked very embarrassed and lowered her head, Perdes smiled bitterly.
It stung because the action felt like a subtle rejection.
He didn't want to embarrass her, so he put his heart in a box and hid it away.
Even though his feelings had grown bigger and spilled out from time to time, he pretended not to notice them, pretended he had made a mistake, and did his best to ignore them.
But when Perdes heard that a man he didn't even know was trying to make Adele his Queen, the sanity that he had been holding onto suddenly snapped.
He didn't want to lose her to another man.
'It was taken away.'
Perdes laughed inwardly, finding it funny that he was using the expression "she was taken away" when she had never been his.
He also regretted acting so hastily.
But it was already spilled milk.
Even if he could turn back time, he would have made the same choice.
So let's push forward.
Perdes, who had promised himself to be honest and show her all his heart even if she threw him out because of this, opened his heavy mouth.
“I know that this situation and my confession are burdensome. I fully understand that you are flustered.”
As Perdes gently ran his thumb over the back of her hand, Adele's earlobes turned bright red.
Her small body flinched and clung to the back of the sofa.
“But please don’t push me away too much. I want you to think about it seriously. About spending the rest of your life with me.”
“...!”
Adele, who had been burying herself in the back of the sofa as if it were a mouse hole, raised her head in surprise.
Eyes that seemed similar but held different emotions crossed in the air.
“What are you saying now...”
“I told you to seriously consider spending the rest of your life with me.”
She thought she misheard, but she didn't. Adele bit her lip at the words that were more embarrassing than simply confessing his love.
Spending the rest of our lives together was no different from getting married.
Marriage?
I'm marrying Perdes.
Her bright green eyes widened at something she had never thought about before.
On the other hand, he thought she would immediately reject it, but instead, she saw Perdes' expression brighten slightly as he looked at her with hope as he pondered the matter.
Perdes leaned slightly towards Adele and asked in a low voice.
“You hate me?”
Adele's ears tingled as he spoke in a whisper at a very close distance.
Adele hesitated, craned her neck, then shook her head slightly.
“Then you don’t want to marry me?”
"That..."
Adele closed her mouth without being able to continue speaking.
Her eyes, which had turned downward to avoid the burdensome gaze of Perdes, traced the ornate patterns on the tablecloth.
She had to firmly refuse.
Hesitating like this would only give him useless hope, so it was right to draw a clear line.
“...”
That's true, but why can't I say anything?
When Chernosser and others hinted at getting married, she cut them off without a second thought.
But why can't that be done now?
Is it because I have received a lot of help from Perdes, so I don't want to hurt him?
'I don't know.'
Her mind was completely jumbled because she couldn't figure out what to do.
She wasn't this confused when she found out her father's secret, but now she doesn't know why.
“You were planning on getting married anyway.”
Perdes threw another stone into the lake of her heart, where a torrent of water was rising.
When Adele raised her head again and looked at him, he asked again.
“You were going to get married someday, right?”
Adele answered, blinking her eyes slowly.
“Maybe... I should.”
Since all of her previous marriages were unhappy, she didn't want to do it, but she had no choice because she needed a child to continue the family line.
She had no choice.
So Adele was considering adopting the boy Leo had brought home as his heir and passing him on to the Leopold family if he really was a blood relative of the Duke of Leopold.
Then there would be no need to marry a man she doesn't like and put in the effort to have children.
Adele no longer had to worry that that guy would take her place like Chernosser did.
But the decision was made not to do so because there was no guarantee that the boy would not covet her position.
She also wanted to see her child grow up to be a great leader in the industry.
A child who is not simply a blood relative of Duke Leopold's family, but is her own blood.
Kid.
Adele suddenly remembered the child she had borne in her first life and bit the soft flesh in her mouth until it bled.
She had lost interest in Chernosser a long time ago, but she couldn't hate the child in her stomach.
Rather, she felt even more affectionate towards him because this child was the only family she had left.
I'll treat you well when you're born.
Adele promised over and over again that she would do her best as a mother, but in the end, she died in vain without ever being able to hold her child in her arms.
'I guess it's better this way.'
If she had held the child in my arms, she might not have been able to let go of her obsession with the child and might have done something crazy like marry Chernosser again.
Adele turned her head to hide the bitter smile spreading across her lips, but Perdes had already seen it.
He said with a smile as bitter as Adele's.
“It seems like you don’t want to get married.”
Adele nodded, not because she meant it that way, but because it was hard to explain the original meaning and because what she said was true.
“It’s not a good thing. To me, marriage is a duty to have children, nothing more, nothing less.”
So, it was a euphemism for saying that it was hard to accept his feelings, but Perdes must have taken it in a different way because he closed his eyes and smiled prettily.
“Really? Then I can do my duty with you.”
Adele was speechless at the completely unexpected answer and stared blankly at him. Then Perdes pressed his forehead against hers.
“Choose me, Adele.”
His low voice rang softly in her ears and made her heart pound mercilessly.
Adele just realized that the only person in this world who called her by her name was Perdes.
“I won’t be greedy enough to make you look at me with the same feelings.”
“...”
“Choose me because I will just be there for you silently, like I am now, to give you strength.”
Adele closed her eyes tightly, feeling a little burdened by the honest feelings that were pressing upon her.
The sound of her heart pounding echoed in her ears.
Objectively speaking, it wasn't a bad suggestion. Rather, it made her ears perk up.
That was understandable. The husband she wanted was someone who would not be greedy for her position and would not be a burden to the family, and Perdes met all of these conditions.
Moreover, he said that he does not covet her heart, so it would be hard to find a more perfect husband than him.
'That's why I couldn't easily reject his confession and were worried.'
Adele found the source of her tangled worries, but she still felt uneasy.
She felt like she was missing something.
Adele tried to think about what it could be, but her head, which was bursting with worries, refused to think any further.
It's not really that important.
Adele, who thought so, nodded without thinking further, relying on the conclusions she had reached so far.
“I'll think about it.”
"Yes."
Although Perdes was disappointed that he had not received a perfect answer after having gathered up the courage to confess, he was satisfied with the positive response he had received.
He felt like pressing on further here would have the opposite effect.
Perdes lifted his chin and spoke forcefully.
“I must try to make it so that you can choose me from now on.”
“You are doing well enough even now.”
“It means I’ll do better. So that you won’t be able to think of any other husband besides me.”
I already don't think about anyone else but you.
Adele rolled the words she couldn't bring herself to say in her mouth, swallowed them, and smiled weakly.
Even that appearance looks pretty, so even if the bean pod is covered, it is covered tightly.
Perdes, who realized anew how much he liked Adele, smiled faintly and lightly kissed the back of her hand.
Then he felt her fingers curl inward as if embarrassed.
He told Adele that she didn't need to give him her heart, but in truth, that was a blatant lie.
She was already quite surprised, but if he asked her to give him her heart, he thought she would get scared and run away.
Now that he's succeeded in appealing to her, he needs to take it slow from now on.
His ultimate goal was to slowly seep into her, like a drizzle soaking her collar, so that when she suddenly came to her senses, she would be completely absorbed in him and unable to escape.
Support Novellate!
Comments
Post a Comment