There were no acacias or epaulets in Blie, but Doris's heart seemed to have hardened. While people were dancing, laughing, and making noise in the party hall, her mood was always in the gutter.
“I’m not drinking, but shall we have a toast?”
Even the friendly behavior of Bardenaldo, who held a cup of tea instead of a glass of wine with a blank expression on his face as if he knew nothing, seemed like nothing more than a disgusting show of coquetry in her eyes.
“You have really taken my maid away. Isn’t that why I can’t take my eyes off Your Highness even for a second?”
“What do you mean?”
“My maid became Your Highness’s aide, so how come I didn’t know anything about it?”
“Oh, that’s the story. It’s only been a few days. Who would have thought that Ephero would return home so suddenly?”
'Oh, that's what you're talking about?'
Doris opened her mouth wide as if she was going to scream, but as the music died down, she barely managed to shut her mouth tightly. If that damn Prince Epero hadn’t come, she would have invited the Crown Prince to her palace and broken a few vases. Just as Doris was taming the Crown Prince in exchange for keeping quiet about the Archduke’s rebels, the Duke of Castagna also frequently left his territory and visited the Crown Prince’s palace in exchange for preventing Ephero from returning home. It’s true that she couldn’t stop Epero for a while, but it’s another matter to have Blie as an aide and to decide to do so without consulting her even once.
“I guess you don’t remember how much time we spent together in those few days.”
“Aren’t you busy with the aftermath of the Grand Duke-related matters?”
Doris clenched her trembling fists and tried to control her anger. She transferred some of the powers that the Archduke had over to the Duke of Castagna, and also made arrangements with several of the Archduke's existing vassals. This was to prevent the remaining Archduke's forces from having any altercations. Of course, the Archduke's vassals were either vassals of the Crown Prince's maternal grandmother, the Marquis of Winston, or senior vassals of the senior Crown Prince's faction, so any 'altercations' they had would be minor.
'Who will become the leader of the Crown Prince's faction?'
There were more and more places that showed that the Duke of Castagna was at the forefront. For example, the Duke of Castagna invited them to the capital and led a meeting. The Crown Prince silently followed the Duke and kept his place, and the remaining Crown Prince faction tacitly acknowledged the Duke of Castagna. Blie was put aside, and today was the long-awaited day of annexation with Bardenaldo. In short, today was a day that Doris should have been in a very good mood.
“It’s a shame about Ephero.”
Even though it was his brother's welcoming party, Bardenaldo expressed his regret without hesitation.
“Her Majesty the Empress seems to have been moved by the consideration shown by His Highness the Crown Prince after seeing this welcoming ceremony. How cruel.”
“Because it’s a different matter from my feelings for my younger brother.”
So, it means that her father is in real trouble because he can't do his job properly.
“Countess Acacia is another matter to me.”
“I heard she's taking a break from serving you. Who else in this palace can I trust and rely on? I trusted and entrusted her to you. She’s a young and beautiful lady, so I thought it would be better to talk about something else than politically speaking to Ephero.”
“Whether or not you consult with me is a different matter.”
Doris responded without hesitation.
“This is friction that wouldn’t have occurred if Ephero hadn’t returned home, so how about we leave it at that?”
No. If you had only consulted me, I wouldn’t have been this angry.
'Something's going to happen.'
If Doris were conscious of her surroundings and the corners of her mouth went up but her eyes didn't blink at all and she quietly suppressed her anger like that, something would definitely happen.
“Your Highness... Your Highness!”
The hand that pulled my slender arm with force was rough, though not painful. His wide back was tense and angry, and I was flustered by the sight of Rhodnes, whom I had never seen before, and was swung around helplessly. As soon as we entered the deserted corridor, Rhodnes suddenly stopped walking quickly.
“What did you talk about?”
I thought for a moment. Should I share with Rhodnes the story I shared with Ephero? Shouldn't I talk about it after I'm a little more certain? If he goes into detail about the fact that Ephero's been acting like a fool, he might go back and smash Ephero's head before he can hear the details.
“Even if it seems like no one is there, there might be someone listening. Let’s talk later when we’re alone and have our thoughts organized in a quiet place.”
I answered quietly, thinking that I would rather convey the main point later than be rude to Ephero. However, Rhodnes listened to the answer without any change in expression and then snickered. I looked up at his lips blankly at the sound that was almost a mockery.
“When was that?”
I briefly regained my sense of embarrassment at the mocking reply.
“First of all... I have to carry out my assigned mission for a few days. You know that.”
“...Which number am I to you?”
I was speechless for a moment. For a moment, I felt a surge of emotion. When Ephero had asked me why I distinguished between allies and enemies, and what my purpose was, I looked at Rhodnes without realizing it. What I wanted was the future. A future I could draw with Rhodnes. I lived in the present to avenge the past, but now that I had a healthy body, I wanted to dream of a future where I could be a little more human.
His voice was calm and low, and not at all excited, but I couldn't shake the feeling that Rhodnes was angry.
“This isn’t that hard. I made the decision because I thought I could do it.”
“...Is it that hard to lean on me?”
Ah. That was the reason. I relaxed my stiff neck for a moment, released my hands that were holding the hem of my dress, and politely brought them forward. He was right. It would have been a little easier if I had asked him. However, I decided that it was better to be by the Crown Prince’s side because he needed me, rather than because he asked me to be by his side. That way, if anything went wrong with the plan...
“Are you afraid that if something goes wrong with your plan, I will be the one to blame?”
“...”
In silent affirmation, Rhodnes roughly stroked his cheek. His face was pale, but his neck was flushed.
“Am I the kind of person who can’t give you that much trust? Are we really friends? You trust and ask for favors and use everyone else, but you don’t do that to me.”
"Your Highness."
“It drives me crazy, Adrienne.”
I couldn't respond to the words pouring out along with the cold breath.
“I still remain in you, in that ‘inside’ of your childhood.”
Ah, the wounded eyes. Looking at those sparkling red eyes, I couldn't make a sound.
“I feel like I can’t even be a proper friend to you.”
Rhodnes knew it too. It wouldn't be a problem to blame me. But I had endured it for a long time. I was a woman who had shared my feelings with him all along, but then married another man and fell in love with him. I jumped in without hesitation, saying I wanted to know the truth. But in the process, he felt completely excluded.
“Friend, it’s good. It’s good to know the truth. No matter what happens to us in the future, it’s good to be fucking friends for now. But... Today is a little difficult.”
"Your Highness."
“I just, I think I need to say this too.”
Rhodnes approached as if he was being dragged, grabbed my shoulder, and lowered his head. I could no longer respond when I saw his sturdy shoulders tremble slightly. He trembled as if he was crying, even though not a single tear fell to the floor. I was held to him like a person in bondage. And after endless silence, Rhodnes' voice was finally heard.
“I’m jealous.”
“!”
“Those fucking kids...m Sorry, I know you don’t like swearing, but just let it go for today. I just wanted to get those kids out of your sight. My insides were burning, and even though I knew you didn’t care about them at all, my throat was still burning and I was going crazy. I’m sorry. For saying such stupid things.”
"Your Highness."
“Yeah. I know. I’m not qualified to say that right now. Even though we’re just friends, I’m afraid of how I’ll torment you if I say anything more than that.”
He spat out the words, his voice thick with self-contempt.
“I didn’t know that. That’s the kind of person I am. That’s why I couldn’t stand seeing you around other men before... In the end, I couldn’t even come near the capital and just wandered around the outskirts, seeing only blood."
“I’m not drinking, but shall we have a toast?”
Even the friendly behavior of Bardenaldo, who held a cup of tea instead of a glass of wine with a blank expression on his face as if he knew nothing, seemed like nothing more than a disgusting show of coquetry in her eyes.
“You have really taken my maid away. Isn’t that why I can’t take my eyes off Your Highness even for a second?”
“What do you mean?”
“My maid became Your Highness’s aide, so how come I didn’t know anything about it?”
“Oh, that’s the story. It’s only been a few days. Who would have thought that Ephero would return home so suddenly?”
'Oh, that's what you're talking about?'
Doris opened her mouth wide as if she was going to scream, but as the music died down, she barely managed to shut her mouth tightly. If that damn Prince Epero hadn’t come, she would have invited the Crown Prince to her palace and broken a few vases. Just as Doris was taming the Crown Prince in exchange for keeping quiet about the Archduke’s rebels, the Duke of Castagna also frequently left his territory and visited the Crown Prince’s palace in exchange for preventing Ephero from returning home. It’s true that she couldn’t stop Epero for a while, but it’s another matter to have Blie as an aide and to decide to do so without consulting her even once.
“I guess you don’t remember how much time we spent together in those few days.”
“Aren’t you busy with the aftermath of the Grand Duke-related matters?”
Doris clenched her trembling fists and tried to control her anger. She transferred some of the powers that the Archduke had over to the Duke of Castagna, and also made arrangements with several of the Archduke's existing vassals. This was to prevent the remaining Archduke's forces from having any altercations. Of course, the Archduke's vassals were either vassals of the Crown Prince's maternal grandmother, the Marquis of Winston, or senior vassals of the senior Crown Prince's faction, so any 'altercations' they had would be minor.
'Who will become the leader of the Crown Prince's faction?'
There were more and more places that showed that the Duke of Castagna was at the forefront. For example, the Duke of Castagna invited them to the capital and led a meeting. The Crown Prince silently followed the Duke and kept his place, and the remaining Crown Prince faction tacitly acknowledged the Duke of Castagna. Blie was put aside, and today was the long-awaited day of annexation with Bardenaldo. In short, today was a day that Doris should have been in a very good mood.
“It’s a shame about Ephero.”
Even though it was his brother's welcoming party, Bardenaldo expressed his regret without hesitation.
“Her Majesty the Empress seems to have been moved by the consideration shown by His Highness the Crown Prince after seeing this welcoming ceremony. How cruel.”
“Because it’s a different matter from my feelings for my younger brother.”
So, it means that her father is in real trouble because he can't do his job properly.
“Countess Acacia is another matter to me.”
“I heard she's taking a break from serving you. Who else in this palace can I trust and rely on? I trusted and entrusted her to you. She’s a young and beautiful lady, so I thought it would be better to talk about something else than politically speaking to Ephero.”
“Whether or not you consult with me is a different matter.”
Doris responded without hesitation.
“This is friction that wouldn’t have occurred if Ephero hadn’t returned home, so how about we leave it at that?”
No. If you had only consulted me, I wouldn’t have been this angry.
Doris suppressed her anger that threatened to explode and turned her head away. She also knew that suggesting that this was the most rebellious thing Bardenaldo could do. But what was this anger?
The woman who should have been completely abandoned, who should no longer show her face near Rhodnes, let alone herself, was right in front of her. Not only that, but she was also getting along with people she shouldn’t be around, and she was monopolizing Rhodnes’ gaze and all the gazes she got from following him around!
Noura was a few steps away, listening to the conversation between the Crown Prince and his wife, feeling anxious. She could see Doris scraping the hangnails off her thumbnails with her well-groomed index fingernails.
'Something's going to happen.'
If Doris were conscious of her surroundings and the corners of her mouth went up but her eyes didn't blink at all and she quietly suppressed her anger like that, something would definitely happen.
***
“Your Highness... Your Highness!”
The hand that pulled my slender arm with force was rough, though not painful. His wide back was tense and angry, and I was flustered by the sight of Rhodnes, whom I had never seen before, and was swung around helplessly. As soon as we entered the deserted corridor, Rhodnes suddenly stopped walking quickly.
“What did you talk about?”
I thought for a moment. Should I share with Rhodnes the story I shared with Ephero? Shouldn't I talk about it after I'm a little more certain? If he goes into detail about the fact that Ephero's been acting like a fool, he might go back and smash Ephero's head before he can hear the details.
“Even if it seems like no one is there, there might be someone listening. Let’s talk later when we’re alone and have our thoughts organized in a quiet place.”
I answered quietly, thinking that I would rather convey the main point later than be rude to Ephero. However, Rhodnes listened to the answer without any change in expression and then snickered. I looked up at his lips blankly at the sound that was almost a mockery.
“When was that?”
I briefly regained my sense of embarrassment at the mocking reply.
“First of all... I have to carry out my assigned mission for a few days. You know that.”
“...Which number am I to you?”
I was speechless for a moment. For a moment, I felt a surge of emotion. When Ephero had asked me why I distinguished between allies and enemies, and what my purpose was, I looked at Rhodnes without realizing it. What I wanted was the future. A future I could draw with Rhodnes. I lived in the present to avenge the past, but now that I had a healthy body, I wanted to dream of a future where I could be a little more human.
If only I could. Really, if only I could. If I had to choose between knowing the truth and dying or covering it up and living, I would choose the former. All I could think was that I couldn’t move forward without erasing all those foolish days from the past.
“Oh, that thing. That thing is important.”
“...”
“I’m your friend too. I get mad because you keep making new friends while you don’t even use your good friends.”
The deep, mocking voice of Rhodnes's voice, filled with self-mockery, penetrated deep into the silence. I thought that the voice was a soliloquy addressed to Rhodnes himself, not to me.
“Am I your 'friend'?”
"...Of course."
My heart ached.
I answered, trying to hide my trembling voice.
“Of course, Your Highness said that you were my best friend just now...”
“Then why do you keep so many secrets from your friends?”
Is this because I didn't properly tell you what I had said to Ephero? I hurriedly answered in a very different atmosphere than usual.
“When Prince Ephero realized that it was me who had called him, he told me that he wanted to be friends with me.”
Thinking about it, it was painful to think that calling Ephero was something I hadn't discussed with Rhodnes.
“How much closer will we become?”
“As much as you need.”
Rhodnes was silent for a moment at the reply that he would be more friendly as needed.
“...Can’t I? No, if you had asked me to do it without calling Ephero in the first place, it wouldn’t have been difficult for me to become His Highness the Crown Prince’s aide.”
“I needed an excuse.”
“Can’t you just make up an excuse? Why do you have to bring in someone else and make it so hard for yourself?”
“Oh, that thing. That thing is important.”
“...”
“I’m your friend too. I get mad because you keep making new friends while you don’t even use your good friends.”
The deep, mocking voice of Rhodnes's voice, filled with self-mockery, penetrated deep into the silence. I thought that the voice was a soliloquy addressed to Rhodnes himself, not to me.
“Am I your 'friend'?”
"...Of course."
My heart ached.
I answered, trying to hide my trembling voice.
“Of course, Your Highness said that you were my best friend just now...”
“Then why do you keep so many secrets from your friends?”
Is this because I didn't properly tell you what I had said to Ephero? I hurriedly answered in a very different atmosphere than usual.
“When Prince Ephero realized that it was me who had called him, he told me that he wanted to be friends with me.”
Thinking about it, it was painful to think that calling Ephero was something I hadn't discussed with Rhodnes.
“How much closer will we become?”
“As much as you need.”
Rhodnes was silent for a moment at the reply that he would be more friendly as needed.
“...Can’t I? No, if you had asked me to do it without calling Ephero in the first place, it wouldn’t have been difficult for me to become His Highness the Crown Prince’s aide.”
“I needed an excuse.”
“Can’t you just make up an excuse? Why do you have to bring in someone else and make it so hard for yourself?”
His voice was calm and low, and not at all excited, but I couldn't shake the feeling that Rhodnes was angry.
“This isn’t that hard. I made the decision because I thought I could do it.”
“...Is it that hard to lean on me?”
Ah. That was the reason. I relaxed my stiff neck for a moment, released my hands that were holding the hem of my dress, and politely brought them forward. He was right. It would have been a little easier if I had asked him. However, I decided that it was better to be by the Crown Prince’s side because he needed me, rather than because he asked me to be by his side. That way, if anything went wrong with the plan...
“Are you afraid that if something goes wrong with your plan, I will be the one to blame?”
“...”
In silent affirmation, Rhodnes roughly stroked his cheek. His face was pale, but his neck was flushed.
“Am I the kind of person who can’t give you that much trust? Are we really friends? You trust and ask for favors and use everyone else, but you don’t do that to me.”
"Your Highness."
“It drives me crazy, Adrienne.”
I couldn't respond to the words pouring out along with the cold breath.
“I still remain in you, in that ‘inside’ of your childhood.”
Ah, the wounded eyes. Looking at those sparkling red eyes, I couldn't make a sound.
“I feel like I can’t even be a proper friend to you.”
Rhodnes knew it too. It wouldn't be a problem to blame me. But I had endured it for a long time. I was a woman who had shared my feelings with him all along, but then married another man and fell in love with him. I jumped in without hesitation, saying I wanted to know the truth. But in the process, he felt completely excluded.
“Friend, it’s good. It’s good to know the truth. No matter what happens to us in the future, it’s good to be fucking friends for now. But... Today is a little difficult.”
"Your Highness."
“I just, I think I need to say this too.”
Rhodnes approached as if he was being dragged, grabbed my shoulder, and lowered his head. I could no longer respond when I saw his sturdy shoulders tremble slightly. He trembled as if he was crying, even though not a single tear fell to the floor. I was held to him like a person in bondage. And after endless silence, Rhodnes' voice was finally heard.
“I’m jealous.”
“!”
“Those fucking kids...m Sorry, I know you don’t like swearing, but just let it go for today. I just wanted to get those kids out of your sight. My insides were burning, and even though I knew you didn’t care about them at all, my throat was still burning and I was going crazy. I’m sorry. For saying such stupid things.”
"Your Highness."
“Yeah. I know. I’m not qualified to say that right now. Even though we’re just friends, I’m afraid of how I’ll torment you if I say anything more than that.”
He spat out the words, his voice thick with self-contempt.
“I didn’t know that. That’s the kind of person I am. That’s why I couldn’t stand seeing you around other men before... In the end, I couldn’t even come near the capital and just wandered around the outskirts, seeing only blood."
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