RAMHM - Chapter 17 < Everything From the Look On Your eyes to the way you speak is impure and annoying >

I stared blankly at Rhodes, my mind now a little better.

'There is no help without a reason.'

This beast before my eyes was clearly trying to make me owe him a debt for some reason. 

Gulp. 

I swallowed my saliva without realizing it. My throat felt as if it was burning and dry. I didn’t know why he was angry. Was it because he didn’t like the fact that the woman who wanted to get away from Noevian was in the mansion? 

But I didn’t come here with any intention from the beginning. I just wanted to please Noevian and act like a tongue in his mouth, and then later on, I hoped that he would be abandoned even more miserably.

“I have not forgotten, Your Highness.”

I don't know why Rodnes was angry, but I understood what he meant, and I suddenly felt that I had to get some help since it had come to this. Asking for help from my family was too absurd, considering the position of Blie and my situation. The only way forward that came to mind was to divorce Count Acacia, inform Noevian of this, and break up with him.

'I did need help from the direct royal family.'

Divorce among nobles was not simple, requiring the seal of a direct imperial family member. If I wanted to proceed without Noevian knowledge, he would have to steal his seal or get help from a close imperial family member.

'If I could get one more help... let's ask this man who seemed to despise the existence of Noevian's government to approve the divorce.'

As I thought about it, my heart which had been beating fast began to calm down. I didn't know what I was asking for, but I was sure I would get something out of it.

'The only thing that's on my mind is...'

I glanced at his complicated-looking eyes.

'Why are you looking at me like that?'

Was it just because he was surprised to see this Blie, who had a face so similar to hers, in front of Adrienne's tombstone? Why did I run away without even paying proper respects to him, a member of the royal family?

'If not that...'

I thought he was pursuing me because he was in love with me, but his expression was always arrogant and cold compared to his polite speech, and his actions were extremely restrained. 

When Rhodnes's bright red eyes and mine met as if someone had pulled them apart.

“Countess Acacia.”

Noevian's voice cut through the space filled with subtle tension.

“I heard that the maids in my mansion were rude to you, Madam. Are you okay?”

***

“I dedicate this poem to Her Highness the Grand Duchess, who at the flower of her youth responded to the Lord’s call and went to Abbey.”

Clap clap clap clap clap!! 

Applause poured out. I watched people I didn't know tell me good stories and miss me. Things like my volunteer work at the orphanage I went to for an event and the temple worship that everyone in the empire goes to were packaged so beautifully. Some even praised me as an incarnation of Saint Marini. They were planning to do this ridiculous event for two days.

"Lady."

“...Let’s go now.”

There was nothing more to see. Before and after death, only those who remembered Adrienne were like that. People who wanted to look good to Noevian. People who wanted to get close to him. 

I walked in the direction where Noevian and Rhodnes disappeared together. When Noevian appeared, Rhodnes dragged him out, saying he had something to tell him. 

I pulled down the hat that Jonah had brought me, but the maids’ eyes quickly followed me, perhaps because of the red dress shining under the black shawl. The music that had been softly playing in the party hall gradually faded away. 

As I walked toward the carriage, I heard a different sound as I got closer to my carriage.

“...I don’t like my wife being a spectacle.”

It was Noevian's voice.

“I don’t want to see Adrienne’s body.”

“...”

“I just wanted to check.”

“I didn’t even send you an invitation, so is that why you came here?”

The calm voice of Noevian overlapped with the voice of Rhodnes, who seemed to be suppressing his anger. I pretended not to hear and moved my legs as fast as my heart was beating. Then I quietly got into the carriage, opened the window, and watched them.

“What are you checking?”

“...I have to see Adrienne’s body with my own eyes.”

“It’s been two years since my wife became the Grand Duchess, so I feel embarrassed when you call her by her name.”

All I could see was Noevian's face straight ahead. Rhodnes's splendid blond hair was not moving at all.

“It’s hard to explain it with my own mouth.”

“Is that an explanation?”

Noevian's expressionless face gradually grew colder. He slowly raised his polite head and looked down at Rhodnes as if he were looking at the most ridiculous thing in the world. Rhodnes and he were about the same height, but he lifted his chin and looked down at his nephew.

“Your first love from your reckless days. Do you want to see the dead body of that first love?”

“...How dare you.”

“I don’t think you’re still thinking about her.”

“I knew her first, and I took her to heart first.”

“...So?”

Noevian snickered. Rhodnes was seen clenching his fists. It was an unusual sight for the Prince, who always seemed so relaxed.

“Aren’t I the one who has a lover, a husband, and now even the head of household?”

“...”

“Adrienne needed a stable, mature man like me, not a troublemaker like Your Highness who ran around here and there and had blood on his hands. Don’t waste time on what you can’t have, invest time on what you can have.”

And Noevian's dark blue eyes met mine. He smiled as if he already knew of my presence.

“I have to see the guests off, so I’ll take my leave now.”

And he approached me with his back to the still-standing Rhodnes. It was just far enough for me to hear his voice, but he reached me without taking even a few steps.

“Are you okay?”

“...”

And his flawless face was filled with worry. I was unnecessarily concerned about Rodnes. He must have said that he wanted to check on my body, which Noevian had brought into the mansion. And he was sure that I was his...

'You said I was your first love.'

“Blie.”

Noevian grabbed my chin as I was staring over his shoulder.

He didn't even have half the strength in his grip, but it hurt a little.

“Look at me.”

“...”

“I asked if you were okay. What did the maids in my mansion do to you?”

They did nothing. Some of them just gathered because they were curious about the face of the landlady they used to serve, and some of them gathered because they were curious about the commotion.

“Aren’t you going to answer?”

Noevian didn’t release the hand that was holding my chin. I turned my gaze away from him and met his blue eyes. I felt as if the carriage seat I was sitting on had suddenly collapsed. I slowly pulled away from Noevian’s hand and stepped back a little. He didn’t take his eyes off me.

“Tell me what the maids did to you.”

“Nothing.”

He held on to the window frame as if he was enduring it.

"Say it."

Even while I was out of my mind after hearing Rhodnes's sudden confession, I suddenly, very suddenly, had this thought. 

Back when I was Adrienne. If Noevian had asked me this question several times back then, would I have opened my mouth? As he had told Rhodnes, he was a mature enough man that I could rely on. He could have solved the problems inside the mansion with a blink of an eye.

“You keep testing my patience.”

They did nothing to Blie. What about Adrienne? 

Well, then there's a lot to say.

“If I had to say, all the maids in the mansion looked down on me.”

"What?"

“From the look in their eyes to the way they spoke, everything was so impure and repulsive that I couldn’t stand it.”

When you were gone, I was just a ghost there. No one was there to talk to me, and I had no choice but to rely on them, so I withered away alone. I was afraid that my every move would be heard by the imperial family through their mouths, and that I would be caught and become someone to you.

'I've been waiting for you to come.'

I wanted to tell you to stay by my side even though I knew you were busy. As the fear inside the Grand Duke's mansion passed, anger came to mind clearly. I remembered them being terrified by Rhodnes's words and apologizing as they dispersed. They didn't show even a single bit of courtesy to Adrienne or Blie.

“It’s unpleasant.”

“...Instead, apologize.”

He answered like that after a long silence. I avoided his gaze. There were many things in my heart, but I was frustrated that I couldn’t say them with Blie’s mouth, and at the same time, I wasn’t satisfied with his answer. 

What would Adrienne have said? Would she have whispered affectionately, “I’ll take care of everything, so don’t worry about it.” 

Just imagining it made me feel like the tears I had been holding back would burst out. A reminiscence party was held for me, who was still alive. A necklace by my lost mother. Noevian who wanted Blie. And yet Noevian who called Adrienne “my wife.”

“I'll go.”

“Just wait a moment. I’ll attach the knight.”

I was swallowing my tears and saying I was going to go, when suddenly. 

Bang!

“I guess that won’t be necessary.”

“!”
Someone gently opened the closed left door of the carriage. I turned my head and a shiny man came in, filling the carriage to capacity.

“I will see the lady off, and the host of the party can stay at the mansion.”

It was Rhodnes, who had been standing far behind Noevian. 

Bang bang! 

As soon as he hit the carriage wall twice, the coachman started the carriage as if he had been waiting. The carriage went so fast that Noevian had no choice but to let us go with wide eyes. I, too, was as surprised as Noevian and wide-eyed, and I saw Rhodnes sitting across from me, with his long legs and arms crossed. A pair of bright red eyes stared at me. His expression looked very dissatisfied.

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