ICTV - Chapter 49

ICTV - Chapter 49

I Changed The Villain

Intoxicated by the warmth provided by Da-seo, Ji-hye practiced analyzing the market and writing more passionately to get more attention.

However, as a high school student, there were limitations to researching without anyone's help. After becoming an adult, I felt that if I received a professional education at university, I would be able to write something that would be more loved.

So, I carefully told my homeroom teacher, and the homeroom teacher responded positively, saying it would be okay since I had many awards. Ji-Hye secretly breathed a sigh of relief.

Yes, excellence awards are also recorded in the life record. Since people only think of winning the grand prize as great, I thought winning the right prize wasn't even an award. I can't write as well as Da-seo, but whatever. What if I'm not the main character? 

I just have to follow my own path. That's what I promised. But,

'What? Department of Creative Writing? Do you want to starve to death? Are you crazy?'

Honestly, it wasn't wrong. Because it was difficult to make a living as a creator.

‘I wonder if you have passion and talent like that kid. Because if I go around with an ugly person like you, I will stand out more.'

When my younger brother asked me to buy equipment for an internet broadcast, I bought it for him right away.

I felt sad and pitiful about my situation that day, and my blood started to burst.

I had an argument with my parents. Up until now, I have lived obediently to my parents, and have never asked them to buy me anything. There weren't even a few clothes hanging in the closet right now. They said it would be okay for students to wear uniforms, but they didn't even take me to the clothing store.

But there was nothing Ji-hye, a minor, could do. Because my parents threatened to not pay my application fee if I applied to the Department of Creative Writing, I ended up having to apply to the department my parents wanted. Because it was a stable university, they were easily accepted, but Ji-Hye was not happy.

‘You’re giving up creative writing? Good idea. Are you saying that no matter how much you try, you'll never be as good as Da-seo?'

‘Mom and Dad, don’t give it a hard time and be more disciplined. Why is she so selfish that my older sister is a senior in high school?'

‘How many times have I told you to smile a little? Are you getting more and more moldy on your face? Because of you, the whole atmosphere in the house is dead.'

I hated hearing the verbal abuse poured at me, but the greatest feeling of loss was the feeling of loss. If I had not had hope from the beginning, I would have been recognized from the beginning

If I hadn't known joy, I wouldn't have been in so much pain.

I tried to convince myself that it would be better, that if I had a stable job, I would be able to write as a hobby, but that didn't work out either. That's because, unlike my own life, which was a series of misfortunes, Da-seo, who had continued good luck, was right next to him.

'When I said I wanted to live alone and write, my mom found me an officetel! Really good! I finally feel like I'm an adult!'

'...'

'And maybe I can live with Ye-ji?'

Jihye’s heart sank at that name. Ye-ji was Da-seo's friend who went to the teacher's office with her when they first met and was Da-seo's best friend until they entered third grade.

‘Yeji’s parents called my mom. If the two of you live together, you can save money on rent by not having to pay the rent, so think about it. But what should I do? If you live here, an apartment is better than an officetel, but there aren't many small apartments for sale.'

He was a child who loved Da-seo so much that he always belittled Ji-hye and was jealous.

‘To be a writer, you have to be good enough to be good, right? What is the author on the topic?'

But she can live with that friend. I pursed my lips and then just closed my mouth. Because Da-seo looked so happy.

It was a terrible curse to watch a life that was completely opposite to your own right next to you.

To make matters worse, the number of views and comments gradually decreased because the plot was boring. I refreshed it several times, every few hours, but the results were the same. Only then did I realize the reality.

I will never survive in this field.

Even if the work I am serializing now is very, very lucky and gets a publication offer or is selected before the contest, what happens after that? 

If I want to make money without relying on my parents, I have to keep publishing new books. I constantly try to understand readers' tastes and maintain popularity...

Ah, I combed my hair. Although I felt lucky that I didn't apply to the Creative Writing Department, I felt even worse because I felt like I had been confirmed dead.

From that day on, I became a complete wreck. But no one noticed such a change in me. They just thought I was quiet even after the college entrance exam and passed it on.

'You said you would start studying coffee right away when you go to college, right?'

'Huh. Because my dream is to become a barista!'

‘Shh, lower your voice. Can't you see the kids sleeping?'

After the college entrance exam, the school was noisy and quiet at the same time. Some children were busy making plans for the future, while others slept all day. I was neither of the two. I just lay down and stared at the empty seat next to me. 

Da-seo now spends more time outside than in class. This is because as soon as the college entrance exam was over, Ye-ji came to visit from time to time as if she had been waiting for it.

‘It’s time to come. Let’s go to the canteen quickly.’

'okay. Hey, Ji-hye, you also....'

'Let's hurry. I'm so hungry!'

As Ye-ji dragged Da-seo out, she looked down at me with eyes full of victory, but I was unconcerned. Rather, I thought it was all luck because Da-seo was not next to me. I muttered with my face buried in the desk.

'There's nothing wrong with you.'

Why am I the only one with an inferiority complex and jealous of that kid? 

I was so disgusted with myself that I felt sick to my stomach. It's okay to get some outside air, is it? 

I eventually had to go out into the hallway. I stood in front of the hallway window.

'Everyone will have their own concerns.'

I shouldn't be jealous of that kid. She really didn't do anything wrong. 

My head whipped itself to get my mind back, but my body was out of control. I muttered.

'I'm really ugly.'

I put my hands in her pockets as if possessed by something.

Whenever I enter a writing contest with Da-seo, the reason we all get compared is because of the people we compare to.

The reason I couldn't apply to the Department of Creative Writing was because of my parents.

The reason I can't write well is because I'm pathetic and have no talent.

With that thought in mind, I took my hand out of my pocket. The small cutter knife sparkled. It was something I impulsively grabbed while getting ready for school this morning. 

I stared intently at the cutter knife. No matter how hard I struggle, I can't get what I want. I keep wanting to be compared.

It is not a map. The moment those two thoughts intersected, the will to not want to live arose. I held a cutter knife. My whole body was shaking. I muttered.

' I can't do it.'

If I do this in a public place like this, it will be a nuisance to other children. How shocked other children would be if they saw this scene now. These are children who need to have fun after the college entrance exam. But what on earth am I trying to do? 

But I still couldn't control my body. The moment the hand holding the cutter knife gradually gained strength, suddenly I felt a presence.

I hurriedly turned around, hiding the cutter knife behind my back. Da-seo was standing across the hallway, holding a can of drink in each hand. I stepped back like a guilty person.

‘Da-seo, this is…’ 

Da-seo asked in a subdued voice while clutching the canned drink tightly.

'What're you doing?'

***

"What're you doing?"

I lifted my face from my knees. Beryl, who was undisturbed despite the constant shaking everywhere, asked as he took out a potion from his bag.

"Are you sick? Are you motion sick?”

"...No. I just suddenly remembered the old days."

Today was the day I left for my travel destination.

I looked around appropriately. Let's clear our heads as much as possible. Let’s enjoy the trip without thinking about anything. I don’t want to go this far and kill the mood. Let's act as if nothing happened. Let's act as if nothing happened with Belial during the trip.

I tried to keep a nonchalant expression, but Beryl, who interpreted that expression to mean something else, sighed in relief.

“You don’t have to force yourself to endure motion sickness.”

Beryl placed my palm on the constantly shaking wooden floor.

“Isn’t it uncomfortable as expected? I’m sorry.”

“No, this is also fresh and good in its own way. Mera and Taksha also look so happy.”

“Those two are always happy wherever they go.”

“That’s right.”

I agreed and looked at the two sitting in the wagon doorway. Mera was humming a song and shaking her legs.

“Let’s go on a trip~! The Young Lady and the Young Master~ With you~!”

Taksha also swung his legs and took out snacks from his backpack.

“Eat snacks~! The Young Lady and the Young Master~ With you~!”

It was a brownie cookie made with the chef's generous skill. Taksha held out a cookie, but Beryl and I shook our heads at the same time. Taksha's eyes widened.

"Young Master. Are you still feeling uneasy?"

"..."

“Don’t be too upset, Young Master. It’s not your fault that the carriage was damaged, right?”

"That's right. This place is also quite clean and nice.”

Mera looked inside the wagon. Wooden boxes were piled up inside the wagon. Mera tilted her head.

“But what did you say you were carrying this wagon?”

“Meat and vegetables! I said we had to move quickly because we didn’t want it to get damaged!”

“Yes, indeed.”

Today is the day Beryl leaves on the trip he has wanted so much. The four of them set off for Tara early in the morning before it was even light.

Originally, we were going to use the plainest and inconspicuous carriage in the Pale family, but that carriage was to be used when Primrose went to her parent's house. 

Beryl had no choice but to get into another carriage. The four of us had a great time playing card games and snacking on snacks in a brown carriage that was a little shabby but had no inconveniences. But, when there was about a third of the way to the enemy territory, the wheel of the carriage suddenly broke. 

The coachman said he would quickly call someone from the village he had passed by earlier, but Beryl was full of worry.

'If you wait until the repairs are complete, it's too late. We'll arrive at Tara only after lunchtime.'

'But that doesn't mean we can walk. If we arrive late, my plans will be ruined.'

Beryl thought deeply and then suddenly asked.

'Do you know how to ride a horse?'

Mera said with an expression on her face that was dumbfounded.

‘Does it look like I can ride it? I know how to run like an animal, but I don't know how to ride an animal.'

‘Yes, I am a fool for expecting too much from a wild child like you.’

Beryl looked back at me. He can ride with Taksha by himself, but Mera is the problem. I know how to ride a horse, but she is not good at it.

You can't have someone sit behind you. It was when Beryl was just pressing his forehead.

'What do we do.'

'It's okay, Brother. I don't mind arriving a little late.'

'It's okay, what's okay? If we arrive late, I have to reorganize my entire schedule.'

‘A nobleman would be better. I'm sorry, but can I leave for a moment?'

It was a gay cart that appeared right then. As soon as the farmer driving the wagon received a few pennies from Beryl, his mouth fell open. He laughed and gave the group a ride.

“Hold on a little. You have to get to Tara early so you can enjoy a lot of things.”

I yawned.

“This is already the fifth time you've said that.”

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