Episode 36. It keeps making me feel smaller.
“The Olivia Liberty I know is stronger than anyone else. So...”
But Margot couldn't continue. Olivia slowly raised her head, but her eyes were filled with tears and welled up.
“No, Professor...”
Her tears fell, dripping down, soaking her skirt. Her throat tightened, and her voice cracked.
"I'm not strong. I... didn't want to be strong. I want to live without worry, without having to struggle to survive."
“...”
"I don't want to face a backlash. I'm not a fighter. I've never been happy while enduring."
Margot couldn't say anything to her as she cried endlessly and revealed her true feelings.
She was born Herod's Princess and has lived her entire life as a pampered Princess. So how can she possibly fully understand Olivia's struggles?
"...Sorry."
Olivia laughed and cried at Margot's words.
“Professor, I’m sorry. I was rude.”
Olivia quickly wiped her face, reflecting on herself for daring to be so insolent to Herod's Princess.
Although her reddened eyes and nose couldn't be hidden, she forced herself to smile again and bow her head.
“I’m going to go now.”
“Yeah, that’s right.”
As Olivia stood up with her bag, Margot quickly caught her.
“Olivia.”
"Yes."
“No one can judge your worth except you. You understand that, right?”
"...Sure."
“Come to me if you’re having a hard time.”
"Thank you."
Olivia bowed deeply, more deeply than ever, and left her office.
Then she went to the trash can behind the faculty building and threw away the lecture materials she spent months preparing into the paper trash. They were useless now.
But as she took a few steps back, Margot's voice overlapped her ears.
“No one can judge your worth except you.”
“Oh, really...”
Olivia wiped her face, then turned and pulled out the documents she'd tossed in the trash. She painstakingly straightened the crumpled documents, put them back in her bag, and left school.
So small.
That was Noah's first impression when he saw her house.
The distance between houses is so great that the concept of a village is vague, but Olivia's house was outside even that vague concept of a village. The only house nearby was apparently empty.
“Uh... It’ll be scary at night...”
Meson, who had barely managed to follow the Prince after much begging, glanced around and muttered, and the bodyguard nodded.
Noah swallowed a sigh and stepped into the small, simple garden of the house. The house, in Pulder's style, had no walls. Of course, the homes of the wealthy and high-ranking would have had walls.
The only thing worth seeing in this small, unassuming house was the lavender wisteria flowers hanging from the exterior walls.
The flowers hanging down were turning brown at the tips, indicating that they were about to wither.
"Your Highness, there's no telling how long we'll have to wait. How about returning to the hotel for now? One person will stay behind and wait, and when Miss Liberty arrives..."
“It’s a hassle.”
He dismissed it in one word and walked towards a small chair placed in the shade of a maple tree.
Then he took out a handkerchief, roughly dusted the chair, and sat down.
Honestly, it was the most uncomfortable chair he ever sat in.
First of all, the chair was too low for him, who was so tall, and it felt incredibly hard, like sitting on a rock. Ultimately, he couldn't overcome the discomfort in his lower back and ended up getting up.
Noah stared down at the most uncomfortable chair in the world. His cool gaze slowly drifted down the worn stone steps that met the chair, then to the front door and stone wall.
The shutters were tightly shut, making it stiflingly hot, and several locks on the old wooden door were cracking with age.
As Meson said, it must have been scary at night.
“...”
Noah suddenly remembered that day.
The day he reached out to her when she was cornered and surrounded by prodigal sons.
She looked at his hand as if to ask what he wanted her to do, and Noah found that funny.
What are you going to do if you don't take my hand now?
So I said it very lightly.
You just have to catch it.
Seeing that shabby house and the tightly shut door brings back that day. What a bad boy.
That was when.
“Huh? Your High! Is she coming? No, I think she is coming.”
At Meson's words, Noah turned around.
A woman was walking towards a shabby house standing alone.
Olivia boarded the multi-person carriage and sat at the very end of the carriage as they headed home. She stared blankly as the carriage rocked and swayed.
Then, when she was about a block away from her stop, a happy family got into the carriage and sat down across from her.
Olivia's gaze, which had been looking outside without meaning, slowly reached them.
It was a young girl, perhaps seven years old, and a couple who appeared to be her parents. They set the child in the middle.
The child's small hands, like maple leaves, held a bag of candy, as if she had bought it at a candy store.
As she peeled open the rolled-up shell and put the candy in her mouth, her parents kept checking her mouth to see if she would swallow it, and the child smiled happily at the sweet taste.
Then the child's eyes met Olivia's, who was looking at her from across the room. Olivia smiled at her.
The child who had been staring at Olivia while chewing on a candy bar smiled back, took a yellow candy out of the bag, and handed it to Olivia.
“Are you giving it to me?”
When Olivia asked with wide eyes, the child smiled and nodded. She glanced at her parents, and they nodded with smiles as if accepting her. Olivia cautiously took the candy from the child.
“Thank you. I’ll enjoy it.”
At that moment, the coachman shouted loudly, "Fourth Avenue!" As the carriage finally stopped, Olivia waved goodbye to the child and her parents before getting out.
The carriage drove off, and she was left behind, staring blankly down at the yellow candy in her hand.
It was so sweet to open the rolled-up shell and put the candy in her mouth.
But for some reason, tears welled up in her eyes.
Olivia lowered her head, holding the candy in her mouth. She didn't raise her head until the tiny candy had completely melted and disappeared.
The sweet taste brought back sweet memories and ran bitterly down her throat.
“Liv, you have to eat carefully.”
“Is it delicious, my daughter?”
She misses the welcoming voices and laughter so much.
Olivia huddled together like someone traversing a harsh winter alone. Like someone piercing through a bitter wind, she took a step, paused, took another step, and then paused again.
Mom, Dad.
Why did you leave me in this cold place, why?
Status, gender, money, and fame.
Those things that she could not do anything about, sometimes like a torrential downpour, sometimes like a storm, sometimes like lightning, would hit the small back that stood alone.
And Olivia endured it all without even an umbrella to shield herself.
Until now.
'A chick struggles to break out of its egg. Only after overcoming that struggle can it finally face the full world.'
'The pain that doesn't kill me makes me stronger.'
'A kite flies high against the wind, not with the wind.'
The famous quotes she had desperately clung to until now flashed through her mind in a very funny way.
She couldn't hang on to anything, so she hung on to those words. Just those words.
A deserted road, the way to a small, simple house.
Olivia covered her face with her hands and wept. Grief surged through her, and the tears poured out.
She just cried, taking one step, stopping, taking another step, stopping, and repeating this.
As if the world was falling apart.
As if the overcast sky was pouring down and the ground beneath her feet was twisting.
And then, it happened.
He appeared.
It was when she was left alone in a world that had fallen apart, gasping for breath and barely raising her head.
“...”
Olivia stared at him blankly.
As the tears that had been shaking the world fell to her feet, she saw him through her clearer vision.
A man who is like the embodiment of royalty.
A person who seems to personify the word perfection.
He kept making her feel smaller.
Noah Astrid.
He appeared as if it were a lie and held out his hand with a cold face.
“Everyone, get out of sight.”
"Yes?"
Meson, who was excited at the thought of seeing it, suddenly became sad, but Noah was merciless.
“Don’t make me say it twice.”
"All right."
The Navy guards gave him a military-style, polite greeting and quickly disappeared, leaving behind Meson, who was hesitating, clutching the back of his neck.
Noah stood upright in front of the mailbox that seemed to mark the boundary of the house.
He squinted his eyes against the bright sunlight of the Pulder, which felt so dazzling that it was distracting, and looked at the small silhouette that was gradually approaching.
This is the only house in this sparsely populated area, so that small silhouette must be her.
She had been walking for a long time along a worn, rocky road, against the pouring sunlight.
It looks like carriages don't even come here. How far do you have to walk to catch one?
But for some reason, she kept walking and stopping, and was approaching very slowly.
Noah's shallow patience was gradually wearing thin.
What on earth are you doing, crouching like that, walking and stopping repeatedly? Like someone braving the wind and rain.
Then, as Olivia took a few more steps toward him, Noah realized that she was truly standing alone in the pouring rain.
“...”
Wearing a white blouse and a pale blue flared skirt, she carried a rough leather bag in her arms, took a step, buried her face in her hands, took another step, and wiped away tears.
As if it were a deja vu, Noah let out a deep sigh as he remembered the memory of her wandering around crying alone.
Is this something he only encounters at moments like this, or does this woman always live in moments like this?
Noah looked at her with cold eyes and approached her, step by step, toward her, who didn't even realize he was approaching.
“The Olivia Liberty I know is stronger than anyone else. So...”
But Margot couldn't continue. Olivia slowly raised her head, but her eyes were filled with tears and welled up.
“No, Professor...”
Her tears fell, dripping down, soaking her skirt. Her throat tightened, and her voice cracked.
"I'm not strong. I... didn't want to be strong. I want to live without worry, without having to struggle to survive."
“...”
"I don't want to face a backlash. I'm not a fighter. I've never been happy while enduring."
Margot couldn't say anything to her as she cried endlessly and revealed her true feelings.
She was born Herod's Princess and has lived her entire life as a pampered Princess. So how can she possibly fully understand Olivia's struggles?
"...Sorry."
Olivia laughed and cried at Margot's words.
“Professor, I’m sorry. I was rude.”
Olivia quickly wiped her face, reflecting on herself for daring to be so insolent to Herod's Princess.
Although her reddened eyes and nose couldn't be hidden, she forced herself to smile again and bow her head.
“I’m going to go now.”
“Yeah, that’s right.”
As Olivia stood up with her bag, Margot quickly caught her.
“Olivia.”
"Yes."
“No one can judge your worth except you. You understand that, right?”
"...Sure."
“Come to me if you’re having a hard time.”
"Thank you."
Olivia bowed deeply, more deeply than ever, and left her office.
Then she went to the trash can behind the faculty building and threw away the lecture materials she spent months preparing into the paper trash. They were useless now.
But as she took a few steps back, Margot's voice overlapped her ears.
“No one can judge your worth except you.”
“Oh, really...”
Olivia wiped her face, then turned and pulled out the documents she'd tossed in the trash. She painstakingly straightened the crumpled documents, put them back in her bag, and left school.
***
So small.
That was Noah's first impression when he saw her house.
The distance between houses is so great that the concept of a village is vague, but Olivia's house was outside even that vague concept of a village. The only house nearby was apparently empty.
“Uh... It’ll be scary at night...”
Meson, who had barely managed to follow the Prince after much begging, glanced around and muttered, and the bodyguard nodded.
Noah swallowed a sigh and stepped into the small, simple garden of the house. The house, in Pulder's style, had no walls. Of course, the homes of the wealthy and high-ranking would have had walls.
The only thing worth seeing in this small, unassuming house was the lavender wisteria flowers hanging from the exterior walls.
The flowers hanging down were turning brown at the tips, indicating that they were about to wither.
"Your Highness, there's no telling how long we'll have to wait. How about returning to the hotel for now? One person will stay behind and wait, and when Miss Liberty arrives..."
“It’s a hassle.”
He dismissed it in one word and walked towards a small chair placed in the shade of a maple tree.
Then he took out a handkerchief, roughly dusted the chair, and sat down.
Honestly, it was the most uncomfortable chair he ever sat in.
First of all, the chair was too low for him, who was so tall, and it felt incredibly hard, like sitting on a rock. Ultimately, he couldn't overcome the discomfort in his lower back and ended up getting up.
Noah stared down at the most uncomfortable chair in the world. His cool gaze slowly drifted down the worn stone steps that met the chair, then to the front door and stone wall.
The shutters were tightly shut, making it stiflingly hot, and several locks on the old wooden door were cracking with age.
As Meson said, it must have been scary at night.
“...”
Noah suddenly remembered that day.
The day he reached out to her when she was cornered and surrounded by prodigal sons.
She looked at his hand as if to ask what he wanted her to do, and Noah found that funny.
What are you going to do if you don't take my hand now?
So I said it very lightly.
You just have to catch it.
Seeing that shabby house and the tightly shut door brings back that day. What a bad boy.
That was when.
“Huh? Your High! Is she coming? No, I think she is coming.”
At Meson's words, Noah turned around.
A woman was walking towards a shabby house standing alone.
Olivia boarded the multi-person carriage and sat at the very end of the carriage as they headed home. She stared blankly as the carriage rocked and swayed.
Then, when she was about a block away from her stop, a happy family got into the carriage and sat down across from her.
Olivia's gaze, which had been looking outside without meaning, slowly reached them.
It was a young girl, perhaps seven years old, and a couple who appeared to be her parents. They set the child in the middle.
The child's small hands, like maple leaves, held a bag of candy, as if she had bought it at a candy store.
As she peeled open the rolled-up shell and put the candy in her mouth, her parents kept checking her mouth to see if she would swallow it, and the child smiled happily at the sweet taste.
Then the child's eyes met Olivia's, who was looking at her from across the room. Olivia smiled at her.
The child who had been staring at Olivia while chewing on a candy bar smiled back, took a yellow candy out of the bag, and handed it to Olivia.
“Are you giving it to me?”
When Olivia asked with wide eyes, the child smiled and nodded. She glanced at her parents, and they nodded with smiles as if accepting her. Olivia cautiously took the candy from the child.
“Thank you. I’ll enjoy it.”
At that moment, the coachman shouted loudly, "Fourth Avenue!" As the carriage finally stopped, Olivia waved goodbye to the child and her parents before getting out.
The carriage drove off, and she was left behind, staring blankly down at the yellow candy in her hand.
It was so sweet to open the rolled-up shell and put the candy in her mouth.
But for some reason, tears welled up in her eyes.
Olivia lowered her head, holding the candy in her mouth. She didn't raise her head until the tiny candy had completely melted and disappeared.
The sweet taste brought back sweet memories and ran bitterly down her throat.
“Liv, you have to eat carefully.”
“Is it delicious, my daughter?”
She misses the welcoming voices and laughter so much.
Olivia huddled together like someone traversing a harsh winter alone. Like someone piercing through a bitter wind, she took a step, paused, took another step, and then paused again.
Mom, Dad.
Why did you leave me in this cold place, why?
Status, gender, money, and fame.
Those things that she could not do anything about, sometimes like a torrential downpour, sometimes like a storm, sometimes like lightning, would hit the small back that stood alone.
And Olivia endured it all without even an umbrella to shield herself.
Until now.
'A chick struggles to break out of its egg. Only after overcoming that struggle can it finally face the full world.'
'The pain that doesn't kill me makes me stronger.'
'A kite flies high against the wind, not with the wind.'
The famous quotes she had desperately clung to until now flashed through her mind in a very funny way.
She couldn't hang on to anything, so she hung on to those words. Just those words.
A deserted road, the way to a small, simple house.
Olivia covered her face with her hands and wept. Grief surged through her, and the tears poured out.
She just cried, taking one step, stopping, taking another step, stopping, and repeating this.
As if the world was falling apart.
As if the overcast sky was pouring down and the ground beneath her feet was twisting.
And then, it happened.
He appeared.
It was when she was left alone in a world that had fallen apart, gasping for breath and barely raising her head.
“...”
Olivia stared at him blankly.
As the tears that had been shaking the world fell to her feet, she saw him through her clearer vision.
A man who is like the embodiment of royalty.
A person who seems to personify the word perfection.
He kept making her feel smaller.
Noah Astrid.
He appeared as if it were a lie and held out his hand with a cold face.
“Everyone, get out of sight.”
"Yes?"
Meson, who was excited at the thought of seeing it, suddenly became sad, but Noah was merciless.
“Don’t make me say it twice.”
"All right."
The Navy guards gave him a military-style, polite greeting and quickly disappeared, leaving behind Meson, who was hesitating, clutching the back of his neck.
Noah stood upright in front of the mailbox that seemed to mark the boundary of the house.
He squinted his eyes against the bright sunlight of the Pulder, which felt so dazzling that it was distracting, and looked at the small silhouette that was gradually approaching.
This is the only house in this sparsely populated area, so that small silhouette must be her.
She had been walking for a long time along a worn, rocky road, against the pouring sunlight.
It looks like carriages don't even come here. How far do you have to walk to catch one?
But for some reason, she kept walking and stopping, and was approaching very slowly.
Noah's shallow patience was gradually wearing thin.
What on earth are you doing, crouching like that, walking and stopping repeatedly? Like someone braving the wind and rain.
Then, as Olivia took a few more steps toward him, Noah realized that she was truly standing alone in the pouring rain.
“...”
Wearing a white blouse and a pale blue flared skirt, she carried a rough leather bag in her arms, took a step, buried her face in her hands, took another step, and wiped away tears.
As if it were a deja vu, Noah let out a deep sigh as he remembered the memory of her wandering around crying alone.
Is this something he only encounters at moments like this, or does this woman always live in moments like this?
Noah looked at her with cold eyes and approached her, step by step, toward her, who didn't even realize he was approaching.
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