TFDBF - Chapter 22




'The most powerful and unforgettable memory came to mind first. This is because it is remembered in the body. Asking for help is just a common phrase that any child in danger can say. Moreover, she described the memories quite clearly. It felt like she was riding in a carriage, going on a picnic, and people were shooting arrows at them.'

'But...!'

'I think the Commander-in-Chief is overly excited.'

I know. No matter how much I think about it, Alfred's excitement is excessive.

I was lost in thought as I sipped the ginger tea Annie gave me, saying it was good for mental and physical stability.

Considering his loyalty to Madam, this may be natural, but where does his endless loyalty come from?

Is it loyalty to the dead Viscount who selected him?

Even though he is related to the Viscountess, he is probably only a 5th cousin.

Is family something that takes even this kind of reckless loyalty for granted?

"Miss?"

I raised my head and smiled at Annie, who called me curiously.

"Thank you. I thought about something else for a moment."

"Well, it just brings back bad memories. Shake it off."

At the words of the maid who was in tears, I tried to smile and raised the corners of my mouth.

"This is a secret. The Madam told me to make arrangements for the young lady to be able to stay until the treatment is completed. So she has the maid blind and others preparing a room for the lady."

I blinked and looked at her in disbelief, then smiled shyly, and then Annie laughed along with me.

"Do not worry. Everyone is very happy that you are staying here!"

"Thank you. I'm also glad that I can watch you for a little longer."

Of course, some people won't like it that much.

***

Regardless of what he was thinking, Alfred came to visit me the next day and treated me with the same polite and courteous attitude.

The new bedroom I was shown was so wonderful that it couldn't be compared to the guest room I was shown before.

I was so overwhelmed with emotion that I couldn't keep my hands still and kept blinking as if I didn't know what to do. 

"I never thought you would care this much.."

"Lord Frank said that you might have to go through more painful nights like yesterday before all your memories come back. I thought it would be a good idea to make life a little more comfortable."

The Madam's eyes looking at me were complicated.

After staying up all night, she ignored me, not showing up at mealtime or tea time.

The hospitality was generous, but her attitude toward me was distant from before.

'It can be said that half of what was intended was achieved.'

The reason she was avoiding me was because seeing me brought back old memories and open wounds.

Also, it may be difficult to see myself hurt by painful memories after going through a near-death crisis as a child.

"Thank you, Ma'am."

I greeted her perfectly and formally, just as she taught me.

This time it was a perfect greeting without a single trace of immaturity.

"...Your skills have improved again."

"That's too much praise."

"No. You must have been a great girl from a decent family."

A faint smile appeared on the Madam's face before disappearing, and she suddenly asked.

"Would you like to take a walk in the garden together?"

"Great."

After hearing the conversation, the head maid from afar caught my eye with a worried expression on her face as if she was concerned about Madam's condition.

Surely. Unlike her usual flawless appearance, the current Madam was somehow loose and disheveled.

Her face looked as if she had lost her soul.

"Could you please wait a moment?"

I wrapped the green shawl that was lying on one side of the room over her shoulders.

"It is cold. I'm all for taking a walk in the garden but I don't want it to harm your health."

"You're a good kid."

She said that with a sigh and slowly took the lead and headed toward the garden, tying the shawl I had covered her with.

The colorful flowers lined up in rows were not as flashy as they should have been.

As she walked through the garden in silence, as if lost in thought, she stopped somewhere.

What I was staring at was a small glass greenhouse in the middle of the garden. The Madam, who had been standing at a distance for a while staring at the empty greenhouse, came to her senses when she heard the sound of a branch snapping.

"Oh. Look at my mind." 

Only then did she notice my presence as she was waiting quietly and reached out her hand to touch my cheek?

"Oh my God, your face is as cold as ice. You were exposed to the cold air for too long." 

"It's okay. I thought you were lost in thought so I wanted to interrupt you. I also had a lot to think about while cooling my head."

She looked at me apologetically, looked around, seemed to hesitate for a moment, and then opened the door to the glass greenhouse.

"It's warm here because there's no wind."

The expression on her face as she slightly lifted the hem of her dress and looked at me as I entered was subtle.

When the door was finally closed, a warm atmosphere lingered in the glass greenhouse.

"There's a light spell on it. So that we can maintain the temperature throughout the four seasons."

She explained after reading my curious blinking expression.

"This is a place he made for my daughter, who especially loves spring flowers."

"There are no flowers now."

"Because the child who likes flowers is no longer here."

Hearing her quiet voice, I carefully sat down on the wooden bench without saying anything.

It felt a little small to me, but if the owner of this bench had been a child, it probably would have been perfect.

"It was that child's favorite spot."

I quietly looked at the sad face and lowered my eyes.

Eric's cold words rang in my ears.

'Do you feel uncomfortable touching the heart of a mother who lost her child?'

'The person you are dealing with is a person who cannot be defeated solely by judging the right and wrong. I cannot guarantee whether you will succeed even if I use all my resources, and in the meantime, you cannot take into consideration the circumstances of all the people who will be included in the plan.'

The kidnapping of Madam's daughter, Flora, was the act of the nobles who were reluctant to see the influence of the Viscount working for the imperial family grow.

Those who were kidnapped with their daughter urged the Viscount to side with the imperial family and stop revising the noble tax obligation law.

The Viscountess did not compromise, and she lost her daughter before her eyes.

After their only daughter disappeared, the couple's relationship could not go back to the way it was before.

The Viscount passed away, suffering from mental illness due to neglecting her children and wife, and the imperial family bestowed upon her the title of Lady.

The title may have made her a role model for many nobles, but it clearly did not make her happy. 

"Ma'am."

At my call, she raised her head with an expression on her face.

"I didn't tell you, but there's actually one more thing that came to mind."

"Yes?"

I wasn't completely opposed to Eric's strategy of digging into her weakest parts.

However, as he said, he did not want to treat the other person solely for his goal'. 

Sometimes, when appropriate sincerity is mixed, persuasion exerts even greater power. 

"The moment my mother died."

I felt the Viscountess flinch at my words.

I placed my hand on her cool hand.

Hoping to convey some warmth. A shadow fell on her face at my words.

I guess she was worried because every memory she remembered was full of unhappy and painful things. 

"spin "Are you gone?"

I nodded and quietly lined up the scenes I remembered.

"I think it was an illness. He was very worried about me until the last moment. You told me I had to live. He held my hand and patted me and told me that I must live."

It was a memory of Isabella that remained vivid in my mind.

Her sadness, pain, and suffering remained and agitated my heart.

My real parents, well.

I have never felt any particular familial affection from the woman who died, leaving behind ny father, whom she had not seen since birth, and her newborn son, Oliver.

Is that why?

Rather than happy moments, there were more painful, unhappy, insulting, and miserable moments that remained in my memory.

The Madam, seeing that my expression was not good, carefully sat down next to me.

"If it's a bad memory, how about not trying to recall it?"

"Yes?"

"I am... If it's a truly unfortunate and painful memory for you, I think it might be better not to try to recall it."

For someone who always had a clear demeanor, her face was very disheveled and her muttering voice was uncertain.

After carefully looking at her face, I spoke slowly but clearly.

"No, Ma'am. I don't want to do that."

She seemed surprised by my firm answer and blinked.


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